Hello all faithful followers! I am not sure how many of you are left, but maybe I can tempt some newbies to make up for it. I apologise for taking so long for all my updates, but life shifted me away from playing more frequently at my HP fanfic hobby. It's a shame because I have promised my fics aren't and will never be abandoned - and I mean it - despite appearances.

Anyway, I found some time and inspiration, so please enjoy this latest installment...

Severus and Sarah have some working though to do...

Reviews appreciated - thanks in advance. 3

Chapter 10 – Moments

Severus and Albus stood with their gazes fixed upon one another's after the young woman rushed from the room.

"It is a great deal to take in," Albus suggested, with obvious regret. His expression was grim, yet still shaped with some optimism. "Give her a few minutes before you go after her."

Severus frowned at the old man, confused by his proposal. "Why me?" he asked, tilting his head slightly in question. In short, he didn't like being told what he should do… especially as he rarely had the autonomy to choose at the best of times.

Dumbledore's lips shaped an amused, yet gentle smile. "I think, Severus, that you and Miss Evans might have unfinished business between the pair of you," he hinted, obliquely, "and what better opportunity than after you have seen to it that she is okay after her quite sizeable shock?"

The dark man's frown deepened. He had no clue as to what the Headmaster was implying, but very sure 'something' was being implied. It was exasperating, to say the least, but rather than be drawn into the old man's allusive game Severus took the opportunity to clear something else up that had recently come to light.

"Her name is 'Evans'?" he queried, feeling both rather curious and the stirrings of turmoil in his chest at contemplating the familiar name from his past.

Dumbledore's smile broadened slightly as if he believed his bait had been taken, observing his dark teacher carefully with sparkling eyes. "Yes… so it seems," he confirmed with a short nod. "Though I have no idea whether there is a connection or not… that will be for you to ascertain, my boy… should you wish, of course," he added, with no small amount of manipulation, Severus believed.

He stood slightly taller, despite the strain it caused his injury, and narrowed his eyes; hoping to fend off any continuation of the old man's emotive needling.

It seemed to work, or otherwise Dumbledore was finished with him for now anyway.

"You should go after her now… comfort her, Severus," the older wizard advised.

"She isn't anything to me," Severus argued, resisting almost purely out of principle. He didn't understand why Dumbledore appeared to be pushing him toward the Muggle woman. He'd stumbled over her (literally) by complete chance; she was not his responsibility. He didn't like the feelings of culpability for her circumstances still weighing in his gut, gouging his conscience whenever the memories came to mind… if he denied her altogether, kept away, didn't involve himself further, perhaps it would all go away?

"She isn't?" the old wizard said, his eyes narrowing with cynical scepticism. "And why should that matter, anyway, Severus?" Albus countered, matter-of-factly.

Severus appeared unsure, looking deep within to come up with some reasoning to save himself from what was likely to be further torment.

Albus took advantage of Severus' moment of uncertainty to pointedly correct him. "You asked for Sarah to accompany you, Severus… that certainly makes her your guest whilst at Hogwarts, no?"

And with that it was 'check-mate'… Severus had no counter response. He had indeed wished for Albus to get Sarah medical assistance. His recollections specifically asking Dumbledore to bring Sarah to Hogwarts with him were a little sketchy, as he had been quite out of it at the time, but he knew that he had probably done so.

The Headmaster swept open the curtain and stepped into the middle of the hospital wing, inviting Snape with a wave of his arm to follow him. Severus, now having virtually no choice, obliged and just as he was turning toward the Infirmary doors the Potter boy pushed through them.

"Ah, Harry… feeling more refreshed?" Dumbledore queried the boy. Severus was secretly pleased to see for himself that the teen was unharmed… and out of harm's way.

The boy looked askance at Severus… but glimpsing down himself he understood why. Severus was still barely dressed; wearing the simple pyjama bottoms, no shoes and only the thick bandage around his middle. The boy would certainly not be used to his stern Professor being dressed so sparsely.

"Er… yeah… fine. Um… Professor, there's somebody crying hysterically in the ladies loos just down the hall," the teenager imparted quite worriedly to Professor Dumbledore.

The older wizard looked promptly to Severus with his eyebrow raised expectantly. Severus conceded and nodded his agreement.

"Fine… I will see to her," he said, wishing he had time to dress appropriately before he attended to the upset woman… but Severus, despite what he'd tried to convince Dumbledore of moments earlier, was privately concerned for the wellbeing of Sarah given the guilt he felt for the damage he'd personally contributed to her situation… he'd just wished somebody else could have taken up this duty to care for her. And given she was now officially his responsibility he did not care to dally. He walked as quickly as he was currently able out through the doors and toward the sanctuary the Muggle woman had evidently fled into.

As he approached the door he heard her crying. Whilst not the complete hysteria Potter had described, Sarah certainly sounded distraught.

He sighed. "Merlin," he muttered quietly; steeling himself with a breath before pushing upon the door and admitting himself to the ladies bathroom.

He saw her immediately… leaning mournfully over the nearest sink covering her face with her hands wailing her eyes out.

She seemed to be aware that he'd entered the room, but couldn't stop weeping despite turning away and trying to compose herself. He moved closer, resigned to the fact that he'd need to physically try to calm her. He reached out and hand and grasped her shoulder, which continued to shudder with each sob.

"Sarah?" he tried, his voice as gentle and soothing as he could manage to make himself sound.

Her breath hitched where she again tried to halt her crying, but was unsuccessful and the mournful wails continued. Severus promptly conceded he had to try a little harder… do it right. He'd read plenty of novels, among them a scene of romance and consolation or two… he knew what was supposed to work.

"Sarah… come on," he invited her softly, reaching with his other hand to take a hold of her arm and turning her gently toward his embrace. When she had turned fully he closed the gap between them, drew her to his chest and folded his arms securely around her, tucking her head neatly under his chin. "It's okay," he soothed.

She practically melted against his body, sobbing even more frantically into his chest for only a short time before the embrace worked its own type of magic and she managed to gain some control over the rebellious hysteria.

After a further few minutes and as soon as she was calm enough that only a few sniffles remained she pulled away slightly to wipe the remaining tears clinging to her cheeks with one of her hands, placing the other flat across where the bandage wrapping his torso ended on his chest. "Are you really okay, Severus… I'm sorry I didn't ask you directly before now."

Severus dropped one of his arms from around her and glanced down, somewhat bemused at how fast her demeanour had changed from thoroughly distraught in herself to suddenly finding concern for him. But he responded, nonetheless.

"I am a little sore still… but, yes, I will heal. I'm okay," he assured her.

She sighed with what seemed like relief. "Good… that's good," she said, nodding lightly. "I wasn't sure if you were going to make it… I mean… there was a moment there when… well, it was horrifying," she explained. Sarah lifted her chin and they locked gazes. "I'm so glad you survived."

The few moments from the previous evening where he felt they had made a fleeting, yet profound connection flitted through Severus' mind… and he mentally added this one among them.

She felt it 'horrifying' the thought of his demise? There was something about that concept that buoyed him internally. His eyes roved her intense expression and was drawn toward her soft, slightly parted lips… hanging with expectancy just there in front of him.

And then the moment passed; Sarah dropped her gaze and Severus released her from the embrace of his arm that had remained encircled comfortingly around her shoulders.

"I'm also so sorry you were hurt in the first place, Severus. I realised before when I looked back on what happened that it was entirely my fault. I hope you'll forgive me," she added, apologetically.

Severus tilted his head with a slight frown of confusion. "I never said I blamed you," he contended. He might have 'thought' it, he admitted internally, but he definitely would never have accused her of such aloud. He knew he could have chosen to Apparate away any time he wished… it was his choice to stay and ensure she escaped the situation too, miscalculated as it was.

She replied insistently. "No… you didn't needed to have though. I know it was because of my idiocy that you were still there to take that hit."

With a soft snort of amusement Severus cracked a small wry smirk. "I very nearly left you in the end," he disclosed candidly with a small nod. And he had, it was the truth; she had frustrated him to the end of his patience.

She looked perturbed, if a mite amused too. "I remember. But I was hoping you'd been just bluffing," she replied.

He shrugged, raising a sardonic eyebrow. If Severus was frank he couldn't actually deduce precisely what he may have done had he not been struck by the slicing spell right at that moment. Maybe he was too chivalrous for his own good, as Dumbledore had suggested… who knew?

"Yeah… well I recall envisioning running you down with my car at one point too," Sarah retorted smugly, copying his expression as best she could.

Severus had to put forth effort to control his amusement showing upon his face. "Really?"

"Uh-huh," she confirmed, but she had less luck hiding her mirth, snorting out a stifled giggle despite her resistance.

He became sombre recalling what she had done with that very weapon the previous evening, however. "And she's capable too… just ask Arian?" he indicated, pointedly, again raising his eyebrow in question.

"Arian?" she queried.

"You remember him, right? Uncultured looking fellow… last seen knocked out cold, wedged tightly beneath the front end?" he illuminated.

As soon as Sarah comprehended what he was referring to with his pronouncement she gasped, becoming instantly solemn and visibly disconcerted. "That was just… panic… and terror. I wouldn't-" she insisted earnestly.

He promptly interrupted her, eyeing her with a steely gaze. "Arian would have killed you instantly with not an ounce of hesitation had we been caught," he informed her with emphatic callousness.

She registered shock upon her features, her eyes searching his in hope of evidence of hyperbole but finding nothing but rigidity in the dark man's gaze. Severus believed this was the first time she had contemplated those on the other side of this war. Their motives and their capabilities… they would be utterly foreign to the Muggle woman.

"And you too, I suppose?" she proposed naively.

His lip curled with contempt. He moved to basin to his left and gripped it with one hand, using the mirror fixed above it to speak to his Muggle companion's reflection behind him instead.

"No. I wouldn't have been so lucky… there would most likely have been not a small amount of torture in store for me before death, I can assure you," he corrected her. "You do not defect from the Dark Lord's ranks without certain consequences."

Severus finally wrapped his arm across his wounded front for support; he'd been out of his hospital bed and standing for quite a while now and his strength was beginning to fail.

She gasped softly behind him again. "And Vincent is caught up in all this too, isn't he?" she asked, laying metaphorical puzzle pieces in place for herself. Her expression became darker. "Of course he is… he practically led me there."

Severus merely nodded his confirmation.

"And is he too as vile and barbaric as you describe? Or just a perverted little snot taking advantage?" Sarah bit out, with distinct revulsion and rage.

Severus relinquished his grip on the basin and turned to face Sarah, leaning against it for support instead. "He's just a fifteen year old boy… I doubt he really understands the nature of what he's got himself involved with yet," he clarified. Severus was certainly furious with the teenager, but in all honesty he didn't believe Crabbe to be all that dangerous yet… just misguided. Of course, whether he was redeemable or not was up for determination, but with a Father up to his neck in Death Eater affairs it was probably unlikely Severus would be able to get through to him if given the opportunity to try to influence him.

"From what I've learned he has apparently received punishment for his tally with you already from the other side… but I don't intend to leave it at that. He'll certainly feel further retribution for the utter contempt with which he's treated you."

"Why should they have punished him?" she demanded, her tone sceptical.

"The Dark Lord does not approve of relations with Muggles," Severus elucidated, succinctly.

"Oh," she intoned. The anger shaping her features was beginning to give way to hints other emotions the revelation raised: humiliation, hurt, grief… Severus could make them all out and more.

"From you?" she asked. "Why should you want to punish him?" she clarified.

Severus' lips parted slightly and frowned lightly, contemplating what felt like a loaded question.

Why him?

Well, he knew the answer, of course, despite what he'd just recently tried to convince Professor Dumbledore of. The truth was they were the exact same reasons she was here at Hogwarts with him in the first place. Why he'd waited a little too long and had allowed himself to be injured fleeing the Malfoy estate. And why he'd relented so easily to Dumbledore's edict that he should be the one to comfort her.

He felt responsible for her. He definitely still felt uncomfortable about injuring her, no matter how accidental, which had resulted in her loss. He was, apparently, chivalrous, according to Albus… perhaps honourable… or some such nonsense he'd much rather deny than properly acknowledge. And not to mention there were the slight stirrings of budding attraction for her that he was only slightly aware of… but he was aware of them, nonetheless.

But he couldn't admit to any of that out loud. He could only deflect.

"Would you rather seek revenge personally?" he taunted, partially amused at the notion.

She just looked back at him silent for several moments. A small thrill of lust swirled deep within him… there was something about a feminine passion-filled reprisal that was a little more than alluring to him.

"Revenge?" she eventually stated, with bitterly aching disgust. "Nothing I can do to him can equal what he's inflicted upon me… with barely any more thought than his intention to use my body to achieve his own carnal gratification like I was just an object."

Sarah's eyes were glistening in pain. "And then you finished the job of savage inconsideration when we collided and it took probably the only sweet thing that could possibly have come of it!" she spat out with chokingly acrid vehemence.

The sharp barb struck Severus deeply in his chest, causing his breath to catch in a soft, short gasp. He had no idea Sarah had the capacity to wound him so profoundly, even if it had been by simply jabbing at his own guilt. And Merlin it stung.

"I'm sorry," he responded, contritely, lowering his gaze, unconsciously adding his second arm across his sore middle, "it's the foulest thing I've ever been responsible for in my life. I'm sorry." Moments later he decided he would not stand here in front of her and endure her judgement any further. He felt a strong urge to flee… to be alone… so he could work out exactly what he was to do about this Achilles heel called 'regret'. He pushed away from the basin ready to leave the girls' bathroom.

If he thought he'd already worked this out, living with guilt over what happened to Lily, he just found out painfully that he was very much mistaken. He'd found a strategy, for Lily… and it helped that she could no longer stand accusingly in front of him. Not so for Sarah, he discovered. Of course, there was Potter wearing Lily's eyes, true… but Severus kept that at bay by getting angry and nasty. For some reason he wasn't prepared to implement that same approach with Sarah.

"I don't think you're in need of my comfort any longer," he stated, moving toward the bathroom door, leaving the woman to herself.

…

Sarah witnessed Severus emotionally shut down almost instantaneously after she angrily spoke of the unnecessary loss of her child, and promptly evaluated what had caused him to do so.

'And then you finished the job of savage inconsideration when we collided…'

"Oh, God… shit," she lamented softly, realising what she had implied, covering her face with her hands, but dropped them as soon as she noticed him moving away.

"No… no, Severus," she implored, stepping toward his retreating form to reach out and grab him by his elbow. "Please… Severus… no, don't leave-"

He tried to ease his arm out of her restraining grasp, but she would not relinquish her hold; he was forced to halt. "I need to return to my bed… I need to rest," he insisted, using the convenient excuse to spare himself further torment.

She quickly assessed him with her eyes. Although looking much better, he was still pale, and his arm across his midsection let her know he was still suffering at least some pain. Yes, he was still recovering and probably was in pressing need of more rest – he'd been up out of bed exerting himself mildly for quite a while now.

But he wasn't about to keel over just yet.

"Wait… just a minute more… please. Severus, you mustn't give any credence to what I just said. I misspoke, the absolute twat that I am. I'm just upset and running my mouth off… I definitely don't assign any blame to you at all for what happened. It was an accident! Please, please don't blame yourself… it makes my heart ache even more to think that you might." She loosened her grasp on his arm, taking the chance that he might continue to pull away, and rubbed her hand along the bare limb comfortingly.

He glanced away and inhaled a deep sighing breath. Severus didn't even want to contemplate it anymore, it hurt that he'd played a role at all, accidental or not.

Sarah continued. "You know, bearing in mind everything I've recently learned it's become quite apparent that maybe just your presence there that night actually saved at least my life… because had I been able to approach the house I suspect neither of us would have survived, would we? The baby wasn't meant to be," she pondered aloud, lowering her head and stepping back from him slightly, dropping her hands from his arm.

He didn't answer, but he agreed… had Sarah, the Muggle, at any time made contact with the Malfoys or other Death Eaters asking for "Vincent Malfoy" in order to announce a pregnancy, no less, it would not have ended well for her. Severus' intervention was, perhaps, a blessing of sorts… and given his track record this was probably the best outcome they could have hoped for.

That knowledge and perspective did have the effect of easing his conscience marginally. Time and reflection would hopefully do the rest.

She looked mournful; her head slightly bowed. He didn't like to see her so unhappy… he reached his hand out and took hold of the fingers of her hand resting loosely at her side and encompassed them within his; giving them a slight squeeze of reassurance.

Sarah raised her head and they again locked their gaze upon one another allowing Severus to add to his mental tally of moments.