Chapter 10

Rose woke me up shortly after midnight to let me know she was back safely from third class. I was still mostly asleep when she came in, but she told me she'd tell me all about it later on before church. Because Trudy was asleep, I sat up long enough to help her out of her corset and it didn't take me long to lie back against the pillows, roll over and fall back asleep.

The next morning, I yawned as I heard Claire in my room. She was in my closet and was pulling out my dress for Sunday services. After she got me up and changed me into a tea dress, she told me Rose was in our promenade deck and for me to enjoy tea with her while she prepared for the morning ahead.

I opened the door to our promenade deck and found Rose sitting alone, absentmindedly stirring a lemon slice into her tea with a silver spoon. It was only when I sat down that she finally looked up, "Maureen."

Lowering my voice, I reached for a tea cup, "You look well rested considering…"

Trudy was approaching to pour my tea, so Rose didn't say what she wanted to say. She gave me a look that said she'd tell me later after Trudy left, "Will you be walking with me to church services?"

Trudy was pouring a cup of tea for me and I followed Rose's suit and put a lemon slice in mine and added a small amount of sugar. After she stepped away and out of the room to give us some privacy, I said I was as I took a drink from my tea, "As soon as Claire dresses me, we can leave. My brother sent word through Mr. Lovejoy that he'll be down here in a moment to join us for a light breakfast before services."

Rose dropped her spoon to her plate with a loud noise and shook her head, "Maureen, I know you want to know about last night. Even though you won't admit it, I know you're curious."

"Well I am curious, but I also know that if you wanted me to know, then you'd tell me." I set my spoon down on my plate more gracefully than Rose did, "I'm not one to pry, Rose, but yes, I would like to know."

Rose got up out of her chair across from me and moved to the one right beside me after making sure the door was locked, "Jack and I had such a great time last night. We danced and laughed and drank so much beer that I thought I'd…"

"Rose!"

She looked over at me, "What?"

I shook my head, "Sorry I missed seeing you like that but please, continue on."

"Speaking of which, where'd you go?"

I felt my cheeks flush, "I left and came back here."

"Maureen. I know you're not telling me the whole truth." She started to smile, "I know you that when you get embarrassed that your cheeks flush now tell me what happened." Rose's eyes were fixed upon me, "Please? I want to know."

I got up from my chair and opened the door to our suite from our promenade deck. After checking to make sure no one was listening, I took the seat next to Rose and took a deep breath, "Well, I left the third class and was on my way back to our room to sleep. I ran into someone and…"

"Who?"

"Harry. Remember…"

Rose interrupted me again, "Of course I do. He's the one that made you smile."

"Yes, him. After I left you downstairs, I walked around the boat deck with him for a little bit then I came to bed."

I could tell Rose wasn't buying my version of events, "And that's it?" I said yes, but she still didn't believe me and smiled, "Liar."

I moved my chair closer to Rose's and looked around the room. Trudy wasn't here and Claire was probably in my suite. After getting up to look for my brother's valet, I sat back down, "Harry kissed me on deck last night."

Rose gasped, "Maureen!"

"I know. I know. It was unexpected. I was trying to tell him what our lives are like. Everything is scheduled out and everything is preplanned. It's just so constricted. Harry didn't believe me."

"Tell him to take a look at mine." Rose took her engagement ring off and tossed it on the table. It bounced once and landed a few inches away from her saucer, "My mother forced me into this. Guilt."

"I don't get it."

"Our family fortune is gone."

"Rose?"

She slowly nodded as she reached for her engagement ring, "My father was a great man and a wonderful father to me, but he had a dark secret. He loved two things in life: Gambling and drinking. My mother tried to stop him but by that time, it was too late. Our fortune was gone and we lost everything. We were on the verge of losing the manor in America when my mother heard Cal was looking for a wife somehow. She had us to meet and next thing you know, I'm engaged to him. Cal still believes the charade that the DeWitt-Bukater name means something." Rose put her ring back on, but put it on to where the diamond was on the bottom of her hand, hidden from view, "My mother keeps telling me that our name is the only card we have to play. She keeps reminding me that if I don't go through with this marriage that she'll be working as a seamstress and what little bit of possessions we have left will be sold at auction."

I was floored, "I had no idea."

"Of course you wouldn't have. I'm not sure how my mother paid for finishing school or kept up the charade of the lifestyle she thought we deserved, but she did. When Cal saw me for the first time, I was barely seventeen. I met him a week after my birthday. Two months later, we were announcing our engagement at a gala in England and now, we're sailing to America to do it all over again. It's been barely five months since we met and already, I'm about to be married." Rose looked up at me, "Five months."

I knew how she felt. I didn't want to admit it, but I knew the reason I was sailing back to America. I was a lady of age and according to the rules in our society, I should have been married off years before and have already begun to produce heirs to whatever fortune I married into, "Rose." I dunked the lemon slice in my tea a few times before lightly scraping the spoon on the edge of the cup, "I can relate. Mother and father have long suggested it's time for me to find a husband. After having to sit through all the cotillions and polo matches with one suitor after another, it's insulting. I'm being treated like an employee. Like a foreman in one of my family's mills. It's insulting."

"As my mother keeps telling me, 'We're women. Our choices are never easy.' That's the phrase she uses every time I object to anything. I objected to Cal's choice in venue for our wedding. I objected to the number of bridesmaids there will be, but mother keeps shoving it in my face I don't have a choice." She tossed her spoon onto the table and watched as it clattered off the table and fell to the floor, just out of reach, "You have choices. I don't."

"I am on the same boat as you. I don't have a choice. I overheard Cal and one of the other passengers talking right after we boarded that our parents already have someone they want to introduce to me at your wedding. Someone from the Porter-Cole lineage I believe."

"You have Harry."

I scoffed, "As if my parents would ever let me marry Harry or someone like him."

"Maureen!"

I sighed, "I know. I don't mean to sound like my brother, but Harry isn't a member of the club. My parents would never approve of it." I began to daydream as I thought of my kiss from earlier, "Anyway, I barely know the man. He's an officer on board the ship we're on. I'm sure he's got a special lady back home in Ireland."

"Ladies."

I looked over as my brother came in. Dressed already in a striped trousers and a gray morning coat, he kissed me gently on the cheek before he did the same to Rose and sat down across from her. He poured himself a cup of tea and began to tell us of the activities of the day that were planned, "Church first, followed by a tour of the ship I've arranged through Thomas Andrews. It should be remarkable. He'll be able to tell us everything about this unsinkable ship we're on."

I let my brother drone on and on in the background as I stirred the lemon slice in my tea a bit more before Claire came to dress me. Grateful to be away from my brother, I felt sorry for leaving Rose where she was, but I had no choice. Church services were in just under two hours and I had to get ready.

Claire had picked out a dark red dress with a matching hat and gloves. I sat down on the edge of the dressing chair and allowed her to pin my hair back. Opting to go without the hat for church, she told me she'd bring it to me before our tour up on the boat deck.

After she was finished, I stood up and got ready to leave as Claire left my room to go back to her state room to get her shawl. Church services were open to all passengers, but the seating would be divided. First class passengers at the front of the hall with the wait staff and third class hidden in the back.

I opened my door, but Cal's yelling stopped me in my tracks, "What do you mean?"

Rose's voice was soft, yet firm, "I am not a foreman in one of your mills that you can command. I am your fiancée."

I held my breath and waited on my brother to explode. "My fian... my fiancée!" As I heard the sound of glass breaking not twenty feet away from me, I reached out for the bedpost to steady myself as Cal continued ranting, "Yes, you are, and my wife. My wife in practice if not yet by law, so you will honor me. You will honor me the way a wife is required to honor a husband. Because I will not be made a fool, Rose. Is this in any way unclear?"

I couldn't hear Rose's response, but as soon as I heard the door open in the next room I quickly moved to the far end of my state room and opened the door that exited out to the hallway and ducked outside before anyone knew that I heard anything. I waited around the corner of our room until Cal was safely on his way to the hall where church would be held before I went back to our room to check on Rose.

She was sitting on the floor in our promenade deck and was crying as Trudy was picking up glass shards from the china that was on the table. Looking around the room, I saw the remnants of Cal's anger. The table was flipped on its side. Shattered pieces of china and silverware were strewn across the room. Rose had been crying and Trudy was consoling Rose who was trying to help her clean up, "I'm so sorry, Trudy." She reached forward and picked up one of the flowers that was on the vase in the middle of the table, "We had a little accident."

"It's alright, miss."

Trudy tried to take the flower from Rose, but she wouldn't let it go, "I'm so sorry. Here, let me help you." Rose got down on her hands and knees and started to pick up the pieces of the shattered china before Trudy stopped her. Rose took one look at Trudy before she noticed I was in the room and fell back against the chair I was sitting in earlier.

I told Trudy I'd get a porter to clean this up and if she would, to start dressing Rose so we weren't late. "My brother is upset enough as it is."

She curtsied, "Yes ma'am."

Rose cast a forlorn glance over her shoulder at me as Trudy gently led her back towards her stateroom.

Appearing a short time later, Rose was in a dark blue dress that clearly matched her mood. She put her white shawl on top of her dress and slowly opened the door and with her head down, allowed me to step into the hall before I heard the faint click of the door behind me. We walked in silence towards the hall where church was, never once speaking of what went down between her and my brother.

Two porters opened the door and as I told each of them thank you, Rose didn't even look up. Cal met us in the aisle and ushered us towards the front of the room, sitting between us. Ruth was on Rose's left, Cal was on her right and I was on the opposite side of Cal. The Astors were seated on the other side of me and as Captain Smith stood up to start the services, I thought I saw a tear trickle down Rose's cheek, but I couldn't stare without being noticed.

Halfway through the service, I heard some sort of commotion outside. As I turned around to see what it was, I couldn't make it out and Ruth's sharp poke to my shoulder as she shot me a menacing glance didn't help either. The school girl in me wanted to stomp my foot and stick out my tongue, but I knew my brother was already in a foul enough mood was it was. He kept glancing down at Rose, who was still melancholy. As the pianist started playing the opening notes to Eternal Father, Strong to Save, I reached down and got my program booklet and flipped to the proper page as I heard Molly Brown's voice behind me singing the song.

Rose's voice was barely above a whisper and the look on her face I couldn't quite place. Cal kept looking down at her, knowing something was wrong with her, but not having a clue what it was.

I knew what it was but I couldn't tell anyone. I looked longingly around the room and my breath caught as I thought I saw Harry, but it was another one of the officers. I kept my head down as much as possible as not to tip Cal off as to what I was doing. When the song ended and the congregation began to sit down, I finally spotted him at the edge of the row where the officers were seated. He caught my eyes just once before I let a small smile escape my lips before turning my attention back to Cal. Harry got the point and turned his attention back to the reverend who was leading the church services.

True to Cal's words, after a light lunch, we were led on a tour of the ship. As we neared the wheelhouse, Mr. Andrews was explaining to Ruth why we needed two steering wheels, when one of the wireless operators approached, "Excuse me but I thought you'd need this." He handed a slip of Marconi paper to Captain Smith, "Another ice warning. This one's from the Baltic."

Captain Smith folded the paper neatly and put it in his pocket. He must have noticed the look of horror on my face and gently put a hand on my shoulder, "Not to worry, miss. Quite normal this time of year. In fact, we're speeding up. I've just ordered the last boilers lit."

Mr. Andrews looked as concerned as I did, but he continued with the tour, "This way. Next stop will be the sun decks."

My brother looped his arm through Rose's but she stopped to adjust her shawl which had gotten caught on a hinge in the wheelhouse room. Ruth saw that as her opportunity and took her daughter's place, leaving Rose and me behind. Mr. Andrews waited on the two of us, and led us outside into the April sun.

I half listened as he talked about the lifeboats and the safety requirements for the ship. I noticed that coming down the ship, there were only seven boats attached to davits in the aisle, with one suspended in the air. Looking to my right, there were two lifeboats on top of the officers' quarters. I was beginning to wonder in my head whether there were enough boats to carry everyone on board. I didn't see any down in third class, but the little area we were in didn't expose much. There could have been storage areas below decks, but how could the boats have been pulled out?

"Mr. Andrews, forgive me. I did the sum in my head and with the number of lifeboats times the capacity you mentioned, forgive me, but it seems that there are not enough for everyone aboard."

I watched as Rose stopped and looked at the lifeboats. We were having the same thoughts as we passed them. There simply weren't enough boats. Mr. Andrews looked impressed that Rose picked up on it, "'Bout half, actually. Rose, you miss nothing, do you?"

"No. I do not, sir."

"These new davits that we use could take a row of boats where we are." He motioned with his hands, "Or they could be stacked on top, but it was thought by some that the deck would look too cluttered, so I was overruled."

Cal hit one of the boats with his walking cane as Ruth took his arm again, "It's a waste of deck space as it is, on an unsinkable ship."

Mr. Andrews chuckled, "Sleep soundly young Rose for I have built you a good ship, strong and true, she's all the lifeboats you need." He motioned ahead of us slightly, "Next stop will be the engine rooms."

Rose didn't look convinced. I knew I wasn't. Being first class, we were guaranteed a spot on a lifeboat if something happened. It was the lower classes that would suffer. I felt a pang of hurt when I realized that meant the people I met below decks would be the ones to suffer. Tommy Ryan. Cora Cartmell and her family. Helga and Fabrizio.

A/N: Reviews please? I think I got all of one review last chapter and it's really disheartening to only get one for something I work so hard on.