Author's Note: See? The update was faster...slightly. Hope you guys had a good summer. Mine was rather eventful, which left me less time to write, but no time for excuses! I scrapped the whole flashback in this chapter because I thought it'd be better without it, but it's still pretty long. I realize I've probably lost about all my readers by now too. xD Oh well, I must not give up. For those of you reading, enjoy the chapter. Previous reviewers, thanks a lot! You guys keep me going!

Unedited, by the way. xD

Perfect Timing by HawkofNavarre

Chapter 10 – Courage

Tired eyes met the night sky. Kira awoke with a dull humming in his head; sweat rolling down the sides of his brow and his heart pounding heavily in his chest. His mind was shaking as he sat up full of fear, seeing Hisagi lying beside him, unconscious. It was like waking up from a nightmare that was so frightening that it shouldn't have even been a nightmare in the first place. And it wasn't a nightmare, nor had it all been in his head. Everything had been far too vivid to be faked.

"Argh… Damn it…"

Kira turned his head, watching the other lieutenant groan painfully before rubbing his back and lifting himself up. Hisagi didn't look much better than what he thought he himself looked like. He wanted to ask what his fellow vice-captain had seen, but his thoughts were too wrapped around in his memories of that foggy vision. Hinamori, Renji, and his captain. The feeling of their zanpakutous going through his body lingered and he felt more ill than he ever had.

"K-Kira… What…happened?" the tattooed male asked almost inaudibly.

"I…don't know," Kira replied, his voice straining.

"Did you see—"

"Yeah. It was too much."

He got to his feet, finally, struggling to lose the images plaguing his mind. There was shouting nearby, and distressing voice ringing through the air, filled with fright and panic. Helping Hisagi up, they quickly headed in the direction of the voice. It was after another second that he figured out who it actually was.

"TAICHO! You stupid, stupid idiot! Why do you always have to do these things?" Matsumoto shrieked, pressuring her captain's wound. She turned her head, tears streaking her face visibly. "Kira! Shuuhei! I need help! Hurry!"

"I-I'll get Unohana-Taicho!" Hisagi told him, reacting immediately. He wanted to keep his mind off the recent occurrence just as much as the blonde.

With his peripheral vision, he could see Hinamori. Kira had to wonder how she'd gotten here, but he didn't have time to question it. Right now, his little knowledge in healing arts was needed. Kneeling down nest to his fellow vice-captain, he hastily recalled his lessons from back at the academy. Pressing his hands against the bleeding injury, a soft green glow appeared beneath his palms. Although he was doing this, it wasn't doing much good. The wound was closing slowly—very slowly. Kira cursed himself for nearly failing the healing class; he'd always been more talented in the usual destruction Kidou. It didn't look like he was going to get much help either. Matsumoto was way too worried to be using her reiatsu effectively and Hisagi had probably only gotten a butterfly to the fourth division. There was a high possibility that Hitsugaya would bleed out before help arrived in time.

"Let me help him," a small voice whispered. "I want to help him."

Kira almost lost control of the art when he heard her speak, thinking Hinamori had been frozen in place. He wasn't sure whether or not she was stable enough to heal the captain, but with her skill in Kidou, she was way more competent in the healing arts than himself. Hers would at least be more useful than his.

"Come on," he told her, gesturing to Hinamori to come, but she didn't move. Instead, she looked to the strawberry blonde.

"Matsumoto-san…?"

Matsumoto nodded immediately. "Help him. Just help him. I know he'd want it too."

-

Pain. Breaking. Dying.

Is this all in my head?

Again, the young male opened his eyes to a familiar room. There was no pain. He was numb as he silently gazed at the ceiling. White bed, white sky, white walls.

There was pain.

Hitsugaya found very little comfort in being back in the fourth division. There was even less of a comfort in having an annoying death butterfly hovering over his head, and the fact that there was a reiatsu nulling barrier in his room just downright pissed him off. Then again, he supposed it was reasonable that Unohana had stuck all these obstacles in his room after escaping so easily last time. It wasn't like he could do it again, so intensely drained of energy that he didn't even have enough to create a pathetic Bakudou.

"This is what happens when you are reckless, Toushirou,"

The voice echoed throughout the area. Alone, Hyourinmaru was quite open.

"Don't tell me that I'm a fool," the stubborn boy mumbled gruffly.

"I did not intend to," Hyourinmaru countered amusedly. "Though you were reckless, it was the most entertaining thing I've seen in a long time."

"So you're laughing at my suffering then," Hitsugaya muttered irritably.

"You think so little of me, Toushirou. I was merely enjoying the struggle of your inner battle. It pleases me to know that my master is so powerful," the dragon explained breezily.

A snicker. "You should know that flattery won't get you anywhere with me."

"Indeed, it is known."

"Then…?" the icy captain pushed slightly. "What exactly are you implying?"

"You have always been clever. Perhaps you will figure it out without my help."

"You're being serious then. You think I'm strong enough to master my Bankai," Hitsugaya realized in astonishment.

"Strong enough, maybe, but you are still too young to contain the last stage of Bankai," was the disappointed reply.

"Then why are you bringing this up?" he demanded in further annoyance.

"There is a way you can—"

"Taicho?"

Hyourinmaru snapped from his presence, and the boy captain was left more agitated than ever. He was exceptionally frustrated. Right now, all he wanted to know was the end of that sentence. It was important. He knew that sentence was going to be something important.

"Taichoooooo? You're not sleeping with your eyes open, are you?"

His blood was pulsing in rage. "MATSUMOTO!"

The vice-captain reeled back in surprise. "But Taicho, I haven't done anything yet!" she protested.

Hitsugaya could hardly do anything to her in the state, except possibly double her paperwork (which she wouldn't do in the first place, so there was really no point in doing so) or scold her for her impossibly bad timing. Neither of them satisfied him so he'd let it slide for now, but as soon as he was dismissed, he was giving all her sake top Kyoraku-Taicho. Without a doubt, the stuff would be downed in all but a few minutes.

A very long sight came from his mouth, releasing as much frustration and stress as he possibly could. Right now, he simply had to deal with her playfulness.

"What do you want?"

"Taicho! That's not how you treat a person!"

"Matsumoto, I know you well enough to see through such a façade," Hitsugaya told her knowingly.

Silence. He turned his head to see his lieutenant peering at the ground. So, there was something serious she had to say—probably about his behaviour a few days prior. This, he saw coming.

"If you have something to say, say it," the quarantined captain commanded.

She didn't begin right away, but he waited for her to prepare herself. If anything, she was going to confront him about his escape from the hospital. However, her downcast face seemed to contradict his thoughts. It looked more like she was going to cry than blow up at him.

"Taicho, why did you submit to that hollow? You're much stronger than that. I know it," Matsumoto declared quietly.

He was shocked at her question. This was something he hadn't intended to speak to about to anyone. Ever. Still, he trusted Matsumoto more than everyone else in Soul Society except Hinamori when it came to secrets. In fact, it was more like he owed her the truth. He couldn't ask for another vice-captain. She was loyal, trustworthy, strong, and everything else that came with being a lieutenant. Besides, she understood him and vice-versa when it came to feelings like these, so he wasn't sure why she was asking about this. It wasn't like he could hide it from her either. She'd been there, and though he wasn't sure exactly what she'd seen, he would tell her, but he would never admit his feelings about Hinamori—if there were any actual feelings to admit.

"Taicho?"

"It wasn't an ordinary hollow," he began, looking back at the ceiling. "He said he was an Arrancar, a special kind hollow. His powers…they were like Aizen's. He showed me things I didn't want to see. He made me doubt myself. He saw into my soul.

She bit her lip, eying the wall as she though of what to say. However, there was not a reason to think since the words were on the tip of her tongue anyway. He could tell. He knew the precise words that she was going to use.

"They used Hinamori," she said, rubbing her temples warily, "and you couldn't fight her because you love—"

"Stop," Hitsugaya ordered harshly. "Matsumoto, I…"

"No, I understand. Taicho, you have to stop all of this. You have to start letting go," the strawberry blonde told him.

"I know."

And he did, but it didn't mean he wanted to. He couldn't think properly anymore. He still believed in her, but he felt betrayed and now he didn't trust his feelings when it came to her. He didn't know how he was supposed to feel.

"Taicho…"

The captain shot her a look, clearly one that said, "I don't want to talk about this."

"But—"

"Matsumoto, no."

He didn't like being this way with his vice-captain, but making him feel worse and more crappy about himself wasn't exactly what he needed right now. Hitsugaya just wanted everything to disappear because everything was so complicated, and he was tired of it all.

"Taicho," Matsumoto began carefully, "I'm sorry. You're my captain, but I can't do anything to help you. I'm sorry, I'm sorry…"

"This is the path I chose, and I'm not going to regret it," he replied solemnly. "You have always been a good lieutenant, Matsumoto. You've always supported me, and for that, I'm grateful. You don't need to apologize."

He watched her press her forehead against the wall, shoulders shuddering softly as she cried to herself. Why she was crying and what she was thinking were unknown to him, and he didn't want to know. This was the last time he would let her cry. Too many tears had been shed because of him. He wouldn't hurt her anymore.

Hitsugaya was lost. Every piece of him was cracked and it seemed like he would fall apart any minute. When were things going to start getting better?

"When will this whole thing end?" she asked, still slumped against the wall.

"I don't know, but I want it to end just as much as you," he replied as he recalled Matsumoto's words. She shouldn't have apologized. She was the last person an apology should've come from.

It's me who should be sorry.

-

Hinamori wasn't sure how she had become so stupid over the many, many years before this. Aizen, perhaps, had influenced her a lot, but she wasn't sure when exactly everyone else in her life had become so insignificant. To have her world revolve around Aizen seemed so impossible now, like she would've never done such a thing in the first place, but it was only yesterday that she decided to leave that desperate part of herself behind. She wanted to be strong, make it seem like Aizen didn't matter at all. Maybe, though, he didn't have to matter. It was her mind that made him so superior that way. However, she had committed herself to protecting her childhood friend, so Aizen simply couldn't matter anymore. Shirou-chan had always protected her, no doubt, and it was only fair that she do the same for him.

Actually…she wondered whether Hitsugaya had become a shinigami solely for the purpose of protecting her. When she had joined the academy, he'd always insulted the fact that she attended it, and yet he'd entered the school years later anyway. The year he had entered, she'd just left the academy and was delighted to find her acceptance into the Fifth Division. After that, Hinamori was so focused on becoming useful to her captain that she'd barely paid attention to him. It was shameful. She had to make up for her past actions. Hitsugaya had worked so hard for her, and she wasn't going to just throw that away. She'd become strong for him, and not for Aizen.

"Bankai," she whispered to herself as she picked up Tobiume and left her room. "That's the first thing, Tobiume, but I have to see him first. I have to let him know that I'm sorry."

Hinamori let her legs carry her to the Fourth Division barracks, thinking about the first time she had seen Shirou-chan's Bankai. It was the most amazing thing she had ever seen. Never had it crossed her mind until that moment that the boy she lived with as a child could be so powerful.

She remembered the frozen air ripping across her face, a chill seeping down her spine and the cold choking her. Reiatsu had stained the atmosphere in the form of snow and it was hard to catch her breath.

And Hitsugaya…

He had been in the sky, floating above her with glistening wings of ice and his power was the only thing she could feel.

Hinamori sighed to herself. She needed to see him, and she needed to see him now. He'd done so much for her—too much—and she hadn't appreciated it even once. She was an unworthy ingrate. Stupid. Pitiful.

The young shinigami shook her head at her thoughts. Now wasn't the time to be putting herself down. If she felt sad and dejected, it wouldn't help anyone.

She saw Unohana gliding down the corridor in all her graciousness. That woman was always around when you need her. Hinamori wondered if she had some sort of secret ability that allowed her to see into the minds of others.

"Unohana-Taicho," the vice-captain greeted, bowing respectfully.

"Ah, Hinamori-Fukutaicho. Are you feeling better?" asked the eternally smiling healer. "I hope you've healed well."

She got the hint. "I have, thank you. Matsumoto-san helped a lot."

"I would hope so," Unohana replied gently. "Are you here to see Hitsugaya-Taicho?"

Hinamori nodded shyly, remembering what had happened the last time she had been in his room. She'd never cause something like that to happen ever again. Right now was the time to fix things, and she had to start with her childhood companion.

"Please be careful, Hinamori-Fukutaicho. Seated unit, room 54."

And with that, the bun-haired lieutenant was left alone in the hall to search for the room that held her Shirou-chan. She looked through the room numbers hastily until she found the right one and almost knocked on the door, but stopped herself.

Suddenly, she felt extremely nervous, especially since she noticed that the door was slightly ajar already. Standing there completely unprepared was like standing in the middle of a crowd without any clothes. What was she going to say to him? "I'm stupid and a really bad friend who used to be obsessed with her captain—you know, the one that was branded a traitor, manager to turn me against you, and then ended up putting you in a coma? Yeah, that's the one! Sorry 'bout that!" just didn't seem to cut it. Furthermore, Matsumoto was probably in the room, and Hinamori wasn't exactly in the strawberry-blonde's good books at present time.

She then knew that even though the words she would say to him were totally unplanned, she had to get in there right now or she would let fear devour her and run away. The courage to face him was shrinking—shrinking fast, but she couldn't just leave. If she backed out now, she would never forgive herself. That would be worse than anything she had done thus far.

Hinamori reached out to the door, trying her hardest to stop trembling and quaking like a frightened puppy. She disregarded the doubt in her heart, pushing open to the other side.

"Hinamori-san…" Matsumoto gasped, blinking in surprise. There wasn't any contempt in the woman's voice, and it was something the other vice-captain was grateful for.

"I…um, I hope I'm not interrupting anything," she stated timidly, looking from Matsumoto to the boy lying on the bed. His eyes were closed, though Hinamori couldn't be sure whether he was sleeping or just thinking.

"No, you're not," the busty blonde waved her off.

"May I see Hitsugaya-kun…alone…?" She swallowed. Here was the moment of truth.

There was a tired look upon the taller female's face. She closed her eyes for a second, lifting her chin into the air and taking in a deep breath. Matsumoto exhaled and the Kidou Master silently wished she could do the same, feeling the breath stuck in her throat. She was too afraid. Getting into this room had already taken so much effort. Then, finally, Matsumoto's eyes fell back onto her.

"Can I trust you to be alone with him?"

"I—what?" Hinamori spluttered nervously. She hadn't really expected that. After the display of distress, she was anticipating more of a verbal explosion because of what had happened last time. Instead, the caring woman was offering her a chance to win back her trust. She couldn't afford to screw this up.

"You know what happened last time, what you caused last time. So can I trust you to be alone with him?" Matsumoto asked again.

The younger vice-captain nodded confidently. "I won't let you down again, Matsumoto-san."

"Alright," was the quiet response she received as the Tenth's second seat brushed by her, exiting and closing the door.

The room was then silent, almost deafeningly so. Hitsugaya was most likely sleeping, thank the Soutaicho, so she had time to think of what she would say. It wasn't as though she had nothing to say to him, because she had everything to say to him. She simply had no idea how to start. She was the one who had probably caused him the most pain. A hollow had stabbed the captain, a hollow that had used her appearance to get to her childhood friend. Her heart lurched. Hinamori had disregarded his care for her, and all because of Aizen. Despicable. No more stupid mistakes. No more.

"Are you ever going to say anything?"

Hinamori jumped like she'd bean pricked with a needle, panic causing her heart to palpitate rapidly. Taking a few seconds to settle herself, she turned to face the source of the shock. "Mou, Shirou-chan! That was mean! I didn't know you were awake!"

She couldn't really tell from where the outburst had come from, but it was definitely a natural reflex. She also knew that she didn't really have the right to speak like that and had ended up covering her mouth to stop herself from saying anything else.

"You were standing there doing nothing," Hitsugaya pointed out indifferently.

The girl kept her mouth covered. There had to be a good way to respond. There just had to be. She anxiously removed her hand from her mouth.

"A—…" Okay, so now her vocal chords were dead. Boy, she was lucky. Wait, she was just that much of a coward. Her voice seemed to be fine.

Hinamori closed her eyes for an instant, gathering herself. "Shirou-chan, you know before I entered the academy, when we were still living with Baa-chan…? Have I…changed since then?"

Silence. She opened her eyes.

"I have, haven't I?" I turned into a person that cared more about her captain than anyone. I became obsessed with a person that didn't exist and you protected me. I was in my own world, so why did do those things?" she asked slowly.

"Hinamori…"

"I know I've hurt you, Shirou-chan, so I don't see why I deserve your protection—or why you should even be my friend anymore. I did so many foolish things that I'll never be able to take back. I don't see why I deserve—"

"It's never been about what you deserve, Bed-Wetter, and if you don't believe that, then you're stupider than I thought," he interjected in his usual manner.

"Shirou-chan…" she murmured at his comment.

He turned his head to look at her and his eyes locked with hers. The young shinigami was frozen in his icy gaze, unable to look away although fear touched every part of her mind. "Help me sit up."

Hinamori nodded reluctantly, almost mechanically moving to his side. Time was moving too fast—or too slow. She wasn't sure. He was in this room, she was in this room. Everything else was irrelevant.

She watched him wince as he sat upright and let the fault sink into her, tugging at her heart. Her stomach twisted sickly with the knowledge of his pain and the quiet became unbearable. She knew he wouldn't have asked for help unless he was totally incapable of doing it by himself. She couldn't even stand to think anymore.

"Hinamori, my actions have never reflected what you deserve, and frankly, I don't give a damn about what you do deserve. I protect you because…because…" He faltered. The next words were important. Hinamori had the feeling that she knew what he wanted to say, but she needed to hear him say it.

"Tell me, Shirou-chan, and tell me the truth, please," the dark-eyed vice-captain begged, the need to know tearing at her.

His face was suddenly completely red as he looked away from her pleading gaze. Hitsugaya had lost his composure! It was true the boy was shy, but turning a colour that even strawberries would be jealous of was a bit much…

"I care, Hinamori," he replied to her astonishment, though his voice grew lower with the next words, "and I need you."

She had no idea whether or not she was supposed to have heard that last line or not, but the first two words had been enough to make her feel like her life as a shinigami was worth living after all. Her selfishness seemed like it had been washed away and the desire to help him as much as he'd helped her was all she felt she wanted to do.

"I'm grateful… and I'm—"

"Don't bother apologizing," he dismissed carelessly. "I did what I wanted."

Hinamori blinked once, twice, then three times. A smile spread across her face. For the first time in centuries, she felt free. "You've grown so much, Hitsugaya-kun. You might be taller than me soon."

He snickered, though the room had become just a little warmer. "Tch. Maybe I've grown, but you're still just a bed-wetter."

Author's Note: What?! He's grown?! Yes, the hint that the romance is coming. :P Anyway, chapter 11 is in the works (I wrote 15 pages three weeks ago and scrapped it all because I hated it.) I'll try not to take forever again, but no promises. xD

Chapter 11: The next, a possibly last, arc starts in this chapter. Hinamori begins her redemption and the romance really begins!

Please review! Constructive criticism is always appreciated, as well as feedback. :D