The Twilight series is the property of Stephenie Meyer - No copyright infringement is intended.

This entire fic is dedicated to JAustenlover.

Dissident

~ * ~

Jasper Whitlock

Sunday crawls by as I wait for Bella's call. She never did call on Friday night, which probably ended up being for the best because I was drunker than I realized and ended up crashing as soon as I got home. She did, however, call Saturday night and we had a particularly good conversation. It felt like things were different somehow, like she was loosening up, and we were definitely flirting more, so I felt like it was time we just stopped avoiding what had happened back in Forks. I wanted her to understand my side of things and I wanted to know how she felt about it all as well. Mostly, I wanted to get past it so that we could move forward, because regardless of how fucked we were in terms of distance and timing, it still felt like something was happening.

So, I suggested that we actually talk about things, and luckily she responded favorably to the idea. Of course, about thirty seconds after she agreed, my fucking friends arrived, ready to go out. I offered to stay home, and I'm still kicking myself for not doing just that, but she urged me to go and it was Brady's birthday. I neglected to mention that to Bella, though, and instead acted all weird because the guys were basically standing there waiting for me to hang up. I was relieved that Peter had opted out of going out because Lauren was in town, because if he had walked in with them, it would have made for a really fucking awkward situation as I tried to say goodbye to her. That's another reason I'm looking forward to this whole talk – finally being able to come clean with Peter and not being so fucking secretive. I'm hoping that's her intention too.

Naturally, because I am waiting for her call, the day moves painfully slowly. I know it's likely to not be until later at night, so I go out and run some errands, trying to keep myself busy until the evening.

Around four in the morning, I wake up with a start. My phone is lying on the bed, just beneath my pillow, and I grab it, worrying that I've missed her call while I was asleep. I pick it up and my heart skips a beat when I see that I have two missed calls. It quickly drops into my stomach when I check the log and see that they are from Alice and Brady. I check my voicemail, just in case. The first message is from Alice, saying that it was good to see me and maybe we can go for a coffee soon. I delete it instantly; Brady leaves a hang up, as usual.

I start worrying immediately, first that she decided she doesn't want to talk about things after all, that maybe this thing is one-sided and she doesn't know how to let me down easily, and then I start to worry that there's actually something wrong. I look at the time again and I realize that it's way too late to call her, but it kills me. I get up and stand in the middle of the room, suddenly full of nervous energy. I go to the bathroom across the hall and then return to pacing in my room. Finally, I convince myself that there's nothing I can do tonight, and that maybe she just wasn't able to get away from Kate. I take off the clothes I fell asleep in and get back into bed. As soon as I lie down, I start thinking of the call she made when she was upset after having a nightmare. She sounded so helpless and sad, and my mind becomes haunted by the memories of her quiet sobs as I tried to talk her down. I don't fall asleep again until it's light out, and even then, it's restless at best.

I wake again around eleven and check my phone to see that I have no missed calls. I decide classes are not happening for me today and eventually I get up to shower and wander over to the cafeteria for food.

By 10:30 that night, I've still done absolutely nothing with myself and my phone has been relatively silent all day. Sick of staring at the screen, like some fifteen-year-old girl, and willing her to call me, I decide, for once, to make a move and call her. I've moved on from feeling bad for myself to genuinely worried that there's something wrong, or at the very least that I upset her with my suggestion on Saturday night to talk about things. I will take it all back, if she needs me to, and happily talk about nothing forever, if that's what she wants. Her silence right now is fucking deafening.

I sit on the edge of the bed and dial her number, my leg bouncing faster with every ring. Finally, after the fourth her voicemail picks up and I sigh before the beep.

"Bella...hey. I, uh...listen, please call me. I just want to know that everything is okay."

I hang up quickly before I can stutter and ramble more, and instantly I feel voicemail regret. I wonder if I should have waited, if it just looks like I'm pressuring her more. I drop my phone on the floor and lie down in the bed. Before I nod off, I reach down and pick it up, wanting to be sure I'll hear it if it rings.

The rest of the week I hear nothing from her, and on top of that, I rarely see Peter either, and when I do, he's distant and always making excuses about having homework or having to go out. I'm starting to wonder if there's something I've missed, if maybe something has happened with the estate or Peter's executor shit, or maybe even the trial, that he hasn't told me about. It's possible, but it still doesn't totally make sense. It definitely doesn't explain why I haven't heard from Bella, since she's now comfortable talking to me when she's upset.

I want to talk to Peter about Bella, to maybe casually ask how she's doing and find out if something is wrong, but given his behavior toward me, I start to second guess whether or not that would be a good idea. There's a strange sort of anxiety tugging at me, and though I refuse to put a name on it, it's getting harder and harder to ignore it.

Saturday afternoon, Brady calls to inform me that we're all going out. All of us includes Peter, and I wonder if he'll still be acting the way he has all week. Either way, I look forward to going out and the distraction it will bring. As each day passes, I become more and more sure that I won't hear from Bella, but that doesn't stop me from obsessing over my fucking silent phone.

Two hours into the evening, I finish the last of my pint and watch Peter as he laughs with Brady at the other end of the table. His icy demeanor with me, and only me, is really starting to get to me. I know something's up...I guess I've known for a while but now I've got a couple beers in me and I've decided I deserve a fucking explanation. I probably should have addressed this earlier but I have this sinking suspicion that it has something to do with Bella, because I can't figure out what the fuck else it could possibly be, and I suppose I've been a little nervous that if it is, I'm giving him an opening. Avoiding it any longer would be ridiculous though, as Peter's attitude toward me has become obvious to our friends, too.

I get up and walk over to Peter's side of the table. He and Brady watch me walk over and there's no inkling of a foreign look on Brady's face. He's noticed Peter's attitude too, and I'm sure he was expecting me to address it at some point. When I'm standing next to Peter, I place my hand on the table and lean down so he can hear me over the din of the bar. "Let me buy you a shot."

He turns his face toward me but looks out, away from me, and his jaw clenches. If he didn't want me to confront him, he could have worked a little harder to be less fucking obvious.

"Now, Pete," I say calmly.

He looks back at Brady and then stands up and follows me over to the bar. When we get there I lean sideways against it and nod at the bartender. She comes over and leans into me and I order two shots of Jägermeister. She flips two shot glasses over and pours in front of us. I drop a ten on the bar and slide Peter's over to him.

"Drink it and then we're going to talk."

He rolls his eyes and I feel my face flush, although I doubt it shows. "Jasper, we're at a fucking bar getting drunk, what do we need to talk about?"

I tilt my head back and dump the shot down my throat. As I place the glass back on the bar, Peter follows suit. "About the fucking silent treatment and attitude you've been giving me. You need to stop acting like a chick and tell me what is going on. I'm not your fucking husband, Peter, and if you've got a problem with me, you need to fucking come out with it."

"You should fucking know, Jasper." His jaw is tight again and he stuffs his hands into his pockets and stares hard at me. The fact that he keeps using my full name and not just "J" isn't lost on me.

Aside from the one thing that I'm hoping he doesn't know about, I can't think of a goddamn thing I've done to deserve his foul attitude. Which makes me even surer that it's that very one thing he's referring to. Problem is, I don't know if it's about the fact that I'd been talking to her, or if it's more than that. I have no idea what she's told him because, like her brother, Bella does the whole bailing-without-explanation thing, too. I decide to play dumb and hope that Peter tips his hand a bit.

"Well, I have no fucking idea, Peter. Like I said, I'm going to need you to quit being an asshole and enlighten me."

He throws his head back and laughs this wicked laugh that I'd never expect from him. It's dark and it's humorless. His eyes slowly lower to meet mine again and he practically snarls, "Me, the asshole. That's brilliant."

I jerk my head to the door. "All right, outside." I don't bother to wait for some sarcastic or passive-aggressive response, I just head toward the door.

When I get there, I push it open and glance behind me to see Peter is there, following me out. We step out into the chilly night and there are some chicks lingering out front, smoking, so I turn the corner and head toward the back of the bar. There's a small parking lot behind the building next to the bar. It's private and mostly empty, so I hop the low fence and cross it. Peter follows and stops a few feet away from me when I lean against the back of the building.

"I know that you were talking to her."

Okay, that's not so bad. Yet, I find it hard to believe he's this twisted up over me talking to Bella and not telling him. "Yeah. I gave her my number before I left Forks and told her to call if she needed anything. She called me upset one night and we talked, and then we just kept talking." I try to play it cool but as often happens when you're caught in a lie and not sure just how caught you are, adrenaline is coursing through me and my heart is pounding against my chest. That, coupled with the heavy, warm, fuzzy feeling with which the booze is blanketing me, leaves me feeling like I am trapped in a too-small room.

"Well, isn't that sweet of you, Jasper." The sarcasm drips from Peter's voice and I'm sure he knows more than he's letting on because I didn't even know he was capable of being this much of a dick. "You never thought it might be prudent to mention to me that you had developed a friendship with my sister?" He spits the last word in a way that tells me "friendship" is not what he's calling it in his head.

"She never mentioned talking to you about it...it was weird at first, and I wasn't sure exactly what it was. I felt like maybe I should let her bring it up to you, when she was ready. I don't know, Peter, it just seemed like all of that should be her call. I never even called her, really – I left the ball in her court, totally. I thought about it, about telling you, but when I asked you about her earlier, you got so fucking weird."

"Earlier...fuck... How long have you been talking to her?" Peter asks, and by his tone I know it's rhetorical but I answer anyway.

"Since maybe a week or so after I left Forks, I guess. Very sporadically."

Peter turns and walks away from me and then turns back. He's pacing now. "I didn't really get the impression, when we were in Forks, that you guys had become friends."

"We talked. We got along. Fuck, Peter, why the fuck are you so angry about this? You're my best friend, she's your sister...is it really that bad for us to be friends?"

Peter puts his hands into his hair and rubs his scalp, and now his expression has shifted. He looks like he's going to burst and I'm starting to wonder if playing dumb was a good idea. I find it fucking hard to believe that after everything, all our conversations, Bella would tell Peter what happened in Forks and not even mention it to me. But I still have no explanation for why she went MIA, and I'm having more and more and more trouble keeping my faith.

"You know what's crazy?" Peter asks, his eyes narrowing.

"Huh?"

"My dad never said anything about having a girlfriend or that he was seeing someone."

"What?"

"Yeah, never mentioned it, and yet, when I was back going through shit at the house three weeks ago, I found a condom wrapper in the office."

My stomach lurches and a mixture of booze and acid bubbles into my throat before I swallow it back. "Peter..." For some reason I am still not ready to admit it, even though I know I am digging a deeper hole. I can't believe I fucking forgot about the wrapper.

He reaches into his back pocket and fishes out his wallet. "What's even more interesting though..." He starts opening the wallet. He smiles a little, and now I am fairly certain he's just enjoying himself. "Is that you and my dad happen to like the same fucking brand." He pulls a condom out, presumably the same one I gave him a little over a week ago, and whips it at me. It hits my chest and falls to the ground and I stare at it for a moment, trying to figure out how I am going to get out of this one.

I open my mouth without knowing what I'm going to say when Pete cuts me off. "Don't fucking bother. I think if I hear you admit it, I might just fucking kill you." He stops for a moment and turns away again and pushes his hands into his hair again. "Fuck, tell me it wasn't that day...when you were in the office with her. Fuck, Jasper, you fucking asshole. My sister."

I'm bombarded by so many emotions at once, and I have no fucking clue what to say because part of me knows that he has a right to react this way. But a realization dawns on me and pushes all of that shit away momentarily; I think of Bella's recent radio silence and it occurs to me that Peter has probably said something to her, too. She never once brought up that day in the office in our phone conversations, and only during the last one did I feel like we were close to talking about it. I didn't know if she felt ashamed, or regretful, or both, but we were finally coming to a point where we could talk comfortably and where we were ready to talk about that and then...she disappears. At first, I thought it was because I had pushed her too far, too fast – but she'd sounded hopeful on the phone, and now I'm wondering if Peter went and fucked that all up.

I could understand him being angry with me, but Bella's whole mental state was so fragile - if he was half as nasty with her as he's being with me, it's no wonder she cut me off without an explanation. Anger overtakes all the other emotions, like guilt and shame and regret, and I clench my fists in an effort to guide that anger away from Peter...for the time being anyway. I need answers, and I suppose he does, too.

"Pete, it wasn't like that," I say, trying to maintain a calm tone of voice. I know he's going to be mad no matter what I say, I just need to keep him as calm as possible.

"Really? Jasper, my fucking father dies and you come home with me under the pretense of wanting to help so you can fuck my sister?"

"Peter, it wasn't fucking pretense. I didn't even fucking know her when I offered to drive you there. You fucking know that."

"All right, whatever. It doesn't change things. You make me sick. Jasper, she was a fucking emotional wreck. I can't fucking believe you. I mean...I heard a lot of shit, but I never judged you. I never even imagined that you'd fucking come home with me and pull that shit with my sister. Especially considering....I mean...fuck."

He paces in front of me and he's almost gone beyond anger, his expression more one of bewilderment. But what resonates with me is the middle part of what he just said. "What do you mean you've heard a lot of shit?"

The pacing stops abruptly. "Give me a break. The Maria Reyes shit? Everyone knows about it, Jasper. And you know what? I didn't give a shit. I guess I don't even blame you, she is hot. But I don't want you anywhere fucking near my sister."

My heart sinks, because I always thought that if Peter had heard the rumors, he had given me the benefit of the doubt...not given me a pass. "You don't know what the fuck you're talking about, Peter," I practically growl. I wondered if Maria would ever stop haunting me. Her position and our crazy dynamic had turned our relationship into some giant fucking urban legend at school, and apparently my decision to keep quiet about it and maintain my dignity, and hers, was a shitty one. All it ever does is backfire.

"It's common knowledge around here, Jasper. That doesn't happen unless it's at least partially true."

"And why do you get to fucking decide what part is true, without even talking to me? All this shit about being my best friend? If you were, you would have fucking asked for the truth, and not silently judged me."

"I didn't fucking judge you. I never thought anything of it."

"Until your sister came into the picture, and then suddenly I'm a dog."

The slap of Peter's hand against the brick wall makes me flinch. "You are a fucking dog, Jasper. You fucked my sister the day of our father's fucking funeral," he shouts. He wipes his mouth and pushes himself off the wall. "With my whole fucking family and all of our friends in the house. I know that's when it happened. I fucking know it. You were both up there. I mean, fuck, Jasper...you are a fucking dog."

"It wasn't like that, Peter. I care about her. Listen, I don't fucking blame you for being pissed, but maybe for once you should get the whole fucking story before you start spouting about shit you don't understand."

"I don't want the fucking details. There's nothing you could say that would make what you did okay. I can't fucking just let go of this. Just don't fucking contact her again."

Peter knows that we aren't speaking right now, and again I wonder if it's because he's confronted her about this. "Peter, did you fucking talk to her about this? Is that why she's not talking to me? Because you made her feel like shit?"

"Her? You think this is about her feeling like shit? If she's not talking to you, it was her own choice, Jasper. I wouldn't fucking put this all on her. I just reminded her that there's a lot she doesn't know about you and she's not in the right fucking emotional state to be making sound judgments right now."

I inhale hard through my nose, trying to squash the rage bubbling up inside me. "Peter, what did you fucking tell her?"

He stares at me for a long time before speaking. "I told her everything. She's my sister. Clearly, you never bothered to share during your little heart-to-hearts, but I thought that it was important."

I have to wonder if maybe I am looking at this all wrong. I know that in a lot of ways, that half an hour in the office in Forks wasn't my finest, but I also know that I haven't really been able to regret it either. Especially once Bella and I started talking. When it happened, it felt like we were both powerless to fight it – to fight that pull that we seemed to have to each other – but now I wonder if that is just my horribly skewed perspective on it all. I wonder because there is no other explanation for how Peter is acting right now. I've never seen him like this and I am fairly certain that must mean that I've done something horrible for him to turn on me so quickly.

Still, it doesn't stop the anger from boiling over. "What did you tell her? What could you have possibly told her, given you know absolutely nothing?"

"I told her what I know. I told her about your reputation with women."

"My...my what? My reputation with women? Did you fucking pull that out of your ass?"

"Oh come on, Jasper. Even aside from the Maria thing, you always have fucking girls hanging around you. I never said anything because I never cared, but that's not going to be my sister. I mean...that's the just way it is. That's not going to be Bella."

I start toward the fence, shoving my hands in my pockets so I don't strangle him. I turn around abruptly and shake my head. "You're a fucking bastard and you don't know shit. And let me tell you something – if you really give a shit about how Bella feels, or what's best for her, then you're also a fucking idiot."

I've said all I can say, because I am too angry, too drunk and Peter is too crazy right now to listen to reason. I turn again and quickly hop the fence and head back to the bar. I'm done for the night, but I figure before I walk back to my room I should go back inside and say goodbye to the guys and make sure they keep an eye on Peter. When I get inside, I see them at one of the pool tables, playing.

I start to head over to them when I hear Peter call out from behind me, "Hey, Jasper."

I turn around and he's in front of me in a second. I barely register his movement before I feel his fist connect with my jaw. The punch isn't as hard as I might expect, but I definitely feel it, and before I can even react, I feel a pair of hands on my biceps, pulling me back. Eli grabs Peter's arms and holds them behind his back as he tries to lunge forward again.

"Stay away from her. You'd better just fucking stay away from her," he shouts, still trying to free himself from Eli's grip.

Brady can tell I'm not going to do anything and loosens his grip. I feel like I could really fuck Peter up right now, but I know better. I'm not going to do anything that would hurt Bella or threaten whatever is left between us – if there's anything left at all. I'm hoping that the reason she stopped calling has to do with Peter and his reaction to all of this, and not because she believed whatever he said about me, and that maybe if I can explain it to her, I can salvage our already shaky relationship. I'll worry about Peter later, when he's calmed down and sobered up.

I shake free of Brady's grasp. "I'm all right, man."

Eli is still holding Peter, who's breathing heavily, still glaring at me and waiting for me to make the next move. I push my hair out of my face and walk past him and out the door. If I'm going to keep myself from hitting him, I need to get away from him.

I take long, quick strides because I need to get the fuck back to my place as soon as possible. I need to think, and then maybe I need to call Bella. She never returned my voicemail from before, but if I can get her on the phone maybe I can explain some of this. But first, I need to work it out in my head.

I'm two blocks from the bar when I hear Brady call out to me. I slow down, and a half a minute later he catches up to me. "I'm guessing you told him?" he asks as I start walking again.

"Not exactly. He knew. He's known for a little while, I guess. Apparently I was a little sloppy with my clean-up job, and ever since he got back from another trip to Forks a few weeks ago, he's been doing some sleuthing. This is probably why Bella isn't talking to me."

"What'd you leave behind?"

"Condom wrapper. He knew we were in the office that afternoon, and then last week we were at a party when his girlfriend was visiting. He asked me for one, said some bullshit about how he didn't have any on him and Lauren couldn't wait. Fucking Sherlock Holmes just wanted to see if they were the same brand. He had it in his wallet still, tonight, and fucking called me out."

Brady hisses. "Fuck, that must have been awkward."

"That's not even half of it. He's so fucking confused and mistaken, and he's being fucking pigheaded."

"Yeah, well...Listen, I believe what you said about what happened with Bella, but you gotta remember it's his sister. If you fucked my sister, I'd probably have to kick your ass, too. Just on principle." He chuckles and I laugh too, because it's true and because this is all kind of ridiculous.

"I know, it's not about that. I knew he would be mad, which is why I didn't tell him in the first place. I thought maybe Bella and I could talk, and then maybe if something was going to happen with us then we could tell Peter....and just leave out that stuff that happened in Forks. But he fucked everything up with his crazy reaction. He told her about Maria and he probably gave her shit about what happened, and now she won't talk to me and probably thinks I'm a total dick." I rub my jaw, which is now beginning to ache from Peter's sucker punch.

"He told her about Maria?"

"Yeah. And the thing is, he doesn't even know anything about it. He probably told her all that fucked up shit that everyone was saying. I should have just explained it to him months ago but I got the impression that he hadn't even really heard much, or had just ignored it. Apparently, he believed all that shit and just didn't care until now."

"You need to explain it to him. It probably won't do you much good, at least not for a while, but at least you can clear up the misconceptions. Are you gonna call Bella?"

"I'm going to try. I don't want her thinking all that awful shit is true...even if she doesn't want to talk to me still, at least I'll have cleared the air. If she believes me. She hasn't called in a week and she was supposed to call me on Sunday. I left her a voicemail and she didn't return my call. I have a feeling Peter has something to do with it."

"Sounds like it. Peter will cool off. Once he does, maybe he'll let you explain, and maybe he'll retract some of what he said to Bella for you."

We get the door of my building and I gesture to the stairs, asking if he plans to come up.

"You got any booze up there?" he asks.

"Yeah, I've got beer."

"All right, let's go."

I wanted to have some time to think for a little when I got back to my room, and then maybe call Bella, but I'm still not exactly sober, my face is really starting to hurt, and I figure talking to Brady might help me sort some shit out. I decide it would be better to call her tomorrow, after I've had a chance to process this shit, and maybe even a chance to clear some shit up with Peter.

Brady and I go back up to my room and we talk about the fight with Peter a little bit more, until there's just nothing left to discuss. I know a lot of shit needs clearing up, but I also know that Peter needs time to cool off, and so do I.

Instead, we put on music, play video games, and talk shit, and Brady plies me with my own beer until I can't feel my face any more, or at least until I don't care. He stumbles out around two or three and shortly after, I fall asleep, my worries over just how much I've fucked things up with both Peter and Bella suppressed just enough by the beer and exhaustion to allow me to do so.

Legna betaed it all. The next chapter will be up on Wednesday (2/3).