Disclaimer: I own nothing! Actually, I do own some people, but not all that many!
A/N: Still, there have been VERY few comments. I am more than a little disappointed, and starting to think that maybe this story wasn't meant to be. I think I'll try writing stories from other categories, like Twilight and Tamora Pierce.
So here's the deal. I'm not much for ultimatums, I mean look how it turned out for Rory, Logan, and their almost engagement. But, this is what happens. I either get ten comments per chapter or nothing is coming up. And the minute I find there are ten comments, I'll put the next chapter. I know its been a few days since I've published, and I have the next four chapters written, so get to commenting.
So, here we go, another chapter, more problems. And this one will be way more entertaining, the last one was more background and preparatory.
Life Out Of Order
"Move in?" Rory was flabbergasted. She had every intention of completely avoiding the situation, and he wanted to move into the room next to hers. 'This cannot be happening.' She thought to herself. 'I am losing it. Completely. I will close my eyes for ten seconds, open them, and he will be gone.' He was still there. "You are here. In my apartment. You kissed me last night and you want to move in with me." It was a statement, not a question.
"No, I kissed you last night, and I told you, it wasn't a big deal. And I don't want to move in with you, I want to move in with you and Falon."
"No, this cannot happen. We have to talk about this. It couldn't have been meaningless. We've been friends for five years, you helped me with Falon all the time, and out of the blue, you kiss me." Rory responded, her voice progressively rising. This did not happen to her, this was not her life.
"Yeah, Mary. If I didn't know you any better, I would think you couldn't stop talking about it because you liked it so much. In fact, I would test that theory right now and kiss you again if your annoyingly cute daughter wasn't watching right now."
"Did your ego just inflate even more? I think we're going to have to break down some walls in this apartment, you'll need to rooms for the size of your head."
"That's cold Mary. So cold. But your just covering up how much you want to play with my head."
"You're disgusting, you know that, right?
"Yeah, yeah. Falon, are you just going to stand there, or are you going to come give me a hug?"
"Trissy!" The girl shrieked as she ran into his arms. She had waited until her mom and uncle had finished bantering, she was so used to it, it didn't even bother her when they did what some people would call arguing.
"Hey sweetheart. Guess what? I'm moving in with you and mommy, so now I'll just be across the hall, all the time. So whenever you want to watch Wonka with me, or if you want to read, I'll be there!"
"Yay!!"
"Tristan….I'm not sure this is the best idea, especially not right now." Rory was hesitant as ever.
"Mary, I think this is one of the best ideas I've ever had!"
"Well, that's not saying very much." Rory deadpanned.
"Mary, don't be like that. You said yourself that you want me for your built in baby sitter, and we always have fun together. Come on, don't be such a prude, you practically lived in my house after Fal was born, and your mother needed peace."
"Yes, but that wasn't just the three of us. That was me, and you, and Fal, and your parents, and Janlan and a fleet of maids, and the cook."
"My parents were hardly there, they couldn't stand Falon crying," Tristan was slightly distracted. He had never understood their stance on Falon, "I can't understand that. It's like they didn't realize that all babies cry. I mean how else was she supposed to tell us that she was hungry, or she needed burping, or she needed a diaper change?"
"Obviously they didn't spend a lot of time with you after you were born. That was the job of all your nannies. And you know, you have the attention of a two year old. Switching from one subject to the next, you could rival Matthew McConaughey!"
"I happen not to be a schizophrenic nutcase with no direction in life. And I am full of talents outside of the bedroom."
"Notice the two year old currently residing in your arms. Please do not discuss your s-e-x-u-a-l p-r-o-w-e-s-s around her."
"Momma, what is sexual prowess?"
"Munchkin, you are too smart for your own good. How about you go and occupy yourself, or wake Gigi and Ella."
"Kay. I think I'll research it. Finn will help me!"
"She's a regular sleuth Mary, I wonder where she gets it?"
"That's what I'm afraid of. She has Gilmore determination and pigheadedness."
"Well, she wants to ask Finn. I think its safe to say that he knows quite a bit on she subject, but he won't even let her date until she's thirty. In fact, I don't think he'll let her anywhere near boys until she's at least twenty-five. On that note, we should start looking for good all-girls school."
"Don't you think that would be encouraging some hot lesbian action in the broom closet?"
"Or on the balcony?" Tristan quickly countered.
"Eww Tristan. Just because you know where I was conceived, doesn't mean we have to talk about it all the time."
"Actually, I think it's a fascinating story. And that Lorelei told me it, just shows how strong of a bond we really have. In fact. I think it's the type of story I should tell at parties, to pick up girls. It will show off my sensitive side." Tristan joked. He had his own methods of picking up girls, and they did involve girls, but usually of the extremely drunk variety that only cared that he was a tall, sculpted, well endowed man without attachments.
"Tristan, if that is how you pick up girls, then it is no wonder you don't mind moving in with us, because its not like you'll be getting any action anyway." Her snappy barb brought up a new issue they both knew they needed to discuss.
"Rory, you don't even have to lecture me, I know that there are to be no playmates here. If I have a girl, then I will insist that we go to her place, and if that is not an option, then a friends' dorm or a hotel, or any public place where I typically entertain myself."
"Tristan—you are disgusting. I don't care where you have sex, as long as its not here. Actually, nights Falon isn't here, and preferably myself either, you can bring over your special friends. And if you are so intoxicated, that you cannot help but bring a girl here, you to must do whatever it is you do quietly and Falon may not find you together. That means that any girl must be dressed and out of your bedroom by the time Falon wakes up."
"Got it Rory. Why are you being so understanding? Goebbels telling you to loosen up, the reign of terror is over?'
"I am related to Adolf, Tristan, I have not reached her level of part-planning evil. And she will never end, her parties are the height of DAR coolness and the downfall of the offspring." By the end of Rory's mini rant, Tristan was cracking up. "Tristan, it is not funny. How many functions have I been forced to attend, especially in the last six years? I only had to go to the REALLY important ones when I was younger, but the minute I decided I just HAD to go to a good college, and NEEDED to attend Chilton, all the strings and contracts got attached. Grugh."
"I'm sorry did you just grunt? Going primal? Need to consult with Kirk, the resident monkey? Or are you an aspiring actress for Geico?"
"Tristan, stop being an ass. It is way to early in the morning for your attitude. And I have only consumed one of my coffees." With that thought, Rory grabbed a second cup and gulped it down within seconds, not even bothering to enjoy the taste.
"So, can I move in now?"
"Patience is a virtue."
"One you happen not to possess Miss. Give-Me-Coffee-And-Give-It-To-Me-Now!"
"The nectar of the gods is a different matter entirely. It is a fundamental principle of the Gilmore Girl way of life to never delay the consumption of coffee. There is nothing that can separate a Gilmore Girl from her life's sustenance—and pie."
"How do you not weight three-hundred pounds?"
"How does your enormous ego fit into this room?"
"It's a big room." Tristan commented blandly. He was by no means a stupid guy, but arguing with a Gilmore Girl was an exhausting activity. She was filled with endless insults, and they had known each other for so long, she knew innumerable embarrassing stories about him.
"And you have a big head. I still fail to understand how you seem to possess the power stretch the walls and enter without banging you head on the sky. And I have not seen you disrobed, so I have no idea if your being your sneaky self and hiding your wand, or if your Willy Wonka. And if you are in fact the genius in the flesh, you had better tell me why you have been withholding your irresistible treats!"
"Disrobed?" Tristan questioned, completely ignoring the rest of her monologue. She was Rory Gilmore, very well known for talking way too much once she got started, gaining thunder as she went along. "Rory Gilmore-Hayden are you suggesting something? I knew you've always had a thing for me. Is that your ulterior motive for having me move in? Do you want to show me the crevices of your room? Would you like to see certain appendages of my own?"
"The only reason I would ever see you disrobed would be if I were searching for certain appendages that you seem so proud of, but are conspicuously missing."
"Your really not nice in the morning before you've had your quota of coffee, are you? A nasty firecracker, I bet your just as wild in bed."
"Ugh. So many responses, and yet they could lead to so much of this dirty talk. Sometimes I think your just the sixteen years younger male version of my mother—without the coffee addiction."
"No my Mary, you have an addiction, according to your mother it is more of a love affair. In one of her random rambling moments, she confided in me that she once had a bag coffee beans named Rafaelo that she slept with. I found in hilarious, if a bit disturbing."
"When you made your list of things to discuss when you showed up and invited yourself to move in, where on the list did this topic come up?"
"Well, it probably would have been around three after where I would sleep and how often we would be having sex." Tristan was joking, but there was a hint of truth behind his words. He didn't expect sex, he was pretty sure Rory hadn't been with a guy since Falon had been conceived almost three years previously. But he did want to date her, to make her happy. She was so important to him in every way.
Rory blushed crimson. She had no idea how she became embarrassed at this point, but the cold hard truth was that his last comment had hit home. She had stayed up all night trying to figure out if Tristan still wanted to move in. Rory shied away from sexual tension, and she knew she couldn't possibly be desirable to him, he had already explained to her what happened, and showed no interest in revisiting the taboo topic.
This was the story of Rory's life. She was always convinced in unrequited love, while her overly caring friends feared hurting their innocent little sister, who was unfortunately far too beautiful and oblivious for her own bood.