DNON.
...
"Dear Mama, set me free...
Mama, let me be!"
-McCartney, Grohl, Novoselic, Smear.
That Sasori fucker is creepy as fuck.
I have no idea how he could conclude that I would ever even consider dating his ball-busting sister/my current boss.
I conclude that the whole Haruno family is completely insane and weird and just...
Absurd.
I regret going in on that awkward little sibling reunion.
The tension was as thick as Naruto's skull.
Anyway, I continued to vacuum up the shop, trying to get the cleaning done fast so maybe Sakura won't rip off my balls in a heartbeat when she sees my face again.
After all, I had a feeling she had other things to worry about, like her estranged brother of ten years, rather than yelling at me and possibly (probably) ripping off my balls.
I blame Naruto if (more like when) it happens.
But I partially blame myself for giving into his idiotic ideas and stupid food-related challenges.
A few moments later I heard the chime of bells as the door closed, and my body panicked.
Fuck.
Since Sasori left, my balls are in the danger zone of being permanently removed from my body.
I seriously would like to keep my balls for future use, but with Sakura, you just never know what she'll do.
Thanks a lot Sasori, you dick.
I could almost feel the skin detaching from my body as I heard the slow and steady footfalls that were getting closer.
Why must I be so stupid?
I started to recite prayers to God (if there is one), closing my eyes as I vacuum the last dust bunny I will ever see.
The last sight I will ever see.
The spawn of Satan spoke- "Well, wasn't that awkward."
What? No flames from hell, no balls detaching from my body?
Is she actually starting a civil conversation with me?
Talk about plot twists.
Maybe seeing her brother totally set her off for the rest of the day.
I opened one eye as my whole frame relaxed, and I looked over at my boss who was leaning against one of the supporting pillars in the room.
I nervously chuckled and replied- "Uh, yeah if you say so."
Good, Sasuke- agreeing to all of her opinions will likely lower my risk of death from the devil spawn that is Haruno Sakura.
I then went back to work, opting for a broom and dust pan instead.
Sakura wouldn't appreciate the roaring of the loud vacuum while she was speaking to me.
Quickly darting towards the opposite side of the room, I started in a corner, sweeping spots that I couldn't get with the vacuum.
After all, this could all be a trap, so I should stay as far away as possible, until proven safe.
Possible war zone going on over here.
Sakura then continued on to ramble-
"I mean, who does he think he is, waltzing around ten years later, thinking that everything's okay? Huh? Like seriously...It just doesn't work that way."
Her tone of voice tells me that she's in some sort of denial with her brother's return, but it isn't my business, so I shouldn't look that deep into what she's saying.
But that prediction lessens as by the end of her rushed ramble, she was brooding at the topic of her family, looking forlorn and just...
Tired.
"Well, I don't know, I haven't really gotten anything from him besides that he's quite the creep. No offense Sakura." I state simply, hoping that I didn't just make a colossal mistake of voicing my own opinion of her creepy brother.
"None taken, sorry for making you uncomfortable back there, but you didn't need to be like a hero or anything, Sasuke." She replies, as I bite my tongue from a snarky comment.
I was totally not playing hero for my ball-busting boss.
Thanks but no thanks.
She can do that shit all on her own.
I nod silently, hoping that she forgot about any punishment that she was trying to conjure up for my lack of assigned work.
"Now, for your punishment..."
Ah fuck.