(Fabian's P.O.V.)

I gaze at the various pictures on display with mixed emotions. Seeing his smile in all of these pictures makes me happy, and reminds me that he lived an amazing life; but, the fact that I'm never going to see that smile again breaks my heart.

I miss him so much. I genuinely believe that I miss him more as every second goes by. I don't think my life will ever be the same without him in it…

"I need to see him."

I turn around and face Amber in surprise.

"What?"

She shrugs, and picks up a picture of her, Alfie, and Patricia sitting on one of the couches at the house. She gently rubs her thumb across the Alfie's face, and starts crying a little.

"I don't think I'll believe he's gone until I see him," she explains, "I know he looks bad, but I have to see him one last time."

Crap, how do I talk her out of this? She can't see him, he looks too awful! I'm sure he's been cleaned up since the last time I saw him, but I'm still an advocate for remembering him as he was.

I place my hand on her shoulder. "Amber, listen to me," I whisper, "He doesn't look even remotely similar to how he did the last time you saw him…he looks horrible. I regret going to see him so much…it's a sight I'll never be able to forget, as much as I'd like to. I don't want you to make the same mistake, Ambs…please don't go see him. For me."

She pulls my hand down from her shoulder, and holds it in hers.

"Fabian, you saw him an hour after he died," she murmurs,"I'm sure he looks better now than he did then, because they…they had to clean him up to present him. I understand what you're saying, but…I don't think I'll be able to fully cope with this unless I see him."

I shrug. Why is she so damn stubborn?!

"Okay, but I'm coming with you…I'd feel horrible if you did this alone."

She looks at me in surprise. "Are you sure?"

I sigh. "I mean, I already saw him once, and he probably does look better now than he did then…I'll be fine."

I have no idea if I'll actually be okay or not.

He's one of the most important people in the world to me, and I'm going to stare at his remains for the second time; I couldn't handle it the first time, so why should I think I'll be able to the second time?

However, I can't let Amber do this alone. I know she'll be traumatized by what she's about to witness, so I think it would be best if someone was there to offer her instant comfort.

She lets go of my hand, and we walk silently toward his casket.

"Thanks for coming with me," she murmurs, "I really didn't want to go on my own."

"Of course."

When we arrive in the room, one of Alfie's grandmothers is praying by his side, blocking our view of his face.

Amber clutches my arm in fear as we move closer to him.

"You can still turn back," I whisper, "You haven't seen anything yet. We can turn around and pretend like this didn't happen."

Despite the fact that she's clearly gripping my arm because she's mortified, she shakes her head.

"No. I have to do this. Let's go."

We walk toward him, with Amber still clinging to me. I hear Alfie's grandmother whisper "amen", and then she slowly backs away from the casket, revealing my Alfie.

He looks much better than I thought he would.

The casket lid is divided into two separate doors, so his lower extremities are covered by the bottom lid; thus, I can't see his shattered legs, and the bones that were popping out of them.

His hands are still covered in little scars, and there are many lacerations and bruises scattered across his face. He still looks terrible and dead, but it is an improvement from a few nights ago.

"Oh god, AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

I jump in alarm at Amber's scream. Shit, I knew this was a bad idea!

She drops to the ground in a heap, and continues to belt a blood-curdling scream. I immediately crouch down to her level, and try to pull her back up.

"Shhh, Amber it's okay—"

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH, AAAAAAAAAAHHHH, AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!"

She falls over into my arms, screaming and sobbing helplessly. Suddenly, an unknown man in a black suit rushes over to us, and bends down beside us.

"What happened?" he asks.

I glance up and see that he's wearing a name tag with the funeral home's logo on it; he must be an employee.

"She's just shocked by how he looks," I shout over Amber's continuous screams, "She'll be alright. I can handle her."

He looks at us sadly, and then walks away. Amber continues to screech and bawl, so much so that she's shaking.

"Hey, Amber, let's go rest outside. I think it would help you." I say as I try to stand her up.

"AAAAAAAHAAA, AAAAAAHA, AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

After a few unsuccessful attempts, I finally manage to stand her up, and hold her against my side. She's so hysterical that she can't walk on her own; so, I gently guide her out of the room, toward the hallway outside of the parlor.

What the hell was I thinking? Why did I believe that this would help her in anyway? I'm such an idiot! I shouldn't have let her do this!

I help her into the hall before the parlor. Up ahead, I can see KT and Eddie sitting on a couch near the washrooms. When they hear Amber's screams, they come running toward us.

KT hurries to Ambers free side, and slings her arm around her waist to help her stand straighter.

"What happened?" Eddie asks we walk her to the couch.

"She saw him." I reply.

Eddie looks at Amber sadly and sighs.

We lead her to the couch. She's in such hysterics when we sit her down that she simply flops back against the cushions, and continues to wail.

"Oh, Amber," KT soothes, "It's okay. I know how you feel, because I saw him too…I know it's tough, so just let it all out."

Amber shakily kicks her stilettos off, and pulls her legs up to her chest. She then buries her head into her knees and continues to sob.

KT and I rub her back in soothing circles while she continues to cry.

I have no idea how else to console her. There's no way she'll be able to be comprehensive with any of us, so I guess the best thing we can do is sit here and wait for her to self-soothe.

"What is going on?"

I look up to see Patricia hurrying toward us.

Eddie reaches his arms out toward her. She enters his embrace, and sits on his lap.

"She went and saw Alfie." he murmurs.

Patricia looks at Amber, and then at me.

"Does…does he really look that bad?" she questions.

"Yeah…he does…it's so horrible…he barely looks like himself." KT murmurs, her voice breaking on her last few words.

Patricia sighs, and looks down at Eddie.

"You're not going anywhere near that casket. Understood?"

"I wasn't planning on it, babe."

I focus my attention back to Amber.

"God, I hate seeing her like this," I say, "I wish there was something I could do to help."

Eddie shrugs. "I think the best thing we can do is let her get it all out. We can comfort her when she's consolable."

We all nod in agreement, and watch helplessly as Amber continues to bawl and wail.

(Joy's P.O.V.)

I fling the front doors to the funeral home open as quickly as I can, and rush toward the parking lot.

My eyes immediately start searching for him.

"Jerome?" I call out.

Ugh, where is he?

"Joyless."

I turn around, and see him coming toward me. His hair is disheveled, his eyes are puffy from crying, and he is wearing a black suit; he doesn't look like his usual self at all.

"Jerome." I breathe.

I run to him, and sling my arms around his neck, while he wraps his arms around my waist in return.

"Hi, love." He replies.

I tilt my head up and plant a lingering kiss on his cheek. After a few minutes, we break apart.

"I…I'm sorry I've been distant," he stammers, "It's just…this has been really hard for me."

I take his hands into mine, and gaze into his eyes.

"I understand honey. He was your lifelong friend, no one expects you to take this lightly."

He chuckles slightly, and leans against the back of my car.

"That's just it…we weren't exactly friends toward the end…and now I'll never get the chance to try to fix things with him."

A few tears roll down his cheeks, but he quickly wipes them away. I rub his shoulder for comfort.

"Jerome, you know Alfie loved you. He loved everyone; he was incapable of hate. Sure, he was angry with you last term because of what you did to Eddie, but after you helped save Patricia from going to prison, everyone could tell that he forgave you. I agree that the two of you weren't as close as you were before, but Alfie didn't die hating you; he died caring about you, and wanting to mend your friendship. I know it's hard, but that's how you have to think about all of this."

A few more tears fall from his eyes. Then, he faces me.

"You're right…Joyless, I don't know what I'd do without you."

I smile, and then I press my lips to his.

He immediately returns the kiss, and snakes his arms around my waist, pulling me closer to him. I respond by wrapping my arms around his neck, and by deepening the kiss.

After a few minutes, we break apart for air. I sigh.

"Do you wanna go in? You don't have to stay for long. There's a lot of pictures on a display. You're in several of them—"

"I just want to see him and leave." he interrupts.

I stare at him in surprise. "Wait…you want to see him?"

He nods. "I have to say goodbye to him. I don't know where he is now, or if he's able to watch us, but I just…I don't feel like I'll have the closure I need until I see him and get a few things off my chest."

I nod, and take his hand into mine.

"Would you like me to go with you?"

"Only if you're comfortable."

I shrug. Fabian told me how bad he looked, so I've been apprehensive about going up to his casket. My last memory of Alfie is him running around the house blowing bubbles before we all left for break…do I really want to replace that final memory with something so horrid?

I shrug. "I'll be fine. I don't want you to have to go through this on your own."

He smiles and laces his fingers through mine. Then, we walk hand-in-hand into the funeral home.

(Amber's P.O.V.)

He was gorgeous when he was alive.

I didn't realize it until he was really flirting with me, but he was so attractive. I loved gazing into his deep brown eyes, tracing my fingers along his muscular arms, and listening to his corny jokes; he wasn't just physically attractive, his personality was as well.

That's how I remember him: handsome, silly, kind, surprisingly smart, charming, and funny.

The last memory I have of him is saying goodbye to him and the others before leaving for fashion school, and whispering that I loved him. After I learned about his death, I was so glad that my final memory of him was positive; but, I felt like I had to see him one last time.

I needed one final goodbye.

Fabian tried to warn me. He tried to talk me out of it, but I didn't listen; I thought that I had to see him, and that I would feel some sort of closure if I did.

I was beyond wrong.

My beautiful last memory of him was obliterated, and replaced with the sight of his mutilated corpse; it was the most horrifying sight I have ever witnessed.

He looked awful; If I hadn't known that it was him, I don't think I would have recognized him.

I didn't what else to do but scream; I'm still screaming. I don't know how else to act.

His perfect skin was tattered and covered with multiple different types of injuries, and he just looked so…dead. It was horrific…I would give anything to forget what I just saw, but I doubt I ever will.

"Amber, try to take some deep breathes," KT murmurs, "It will help."

I try to steady my breathing, but I just can't. I don't know how else to respond to this; I can't calm down, no matter how hard I try.

I look over to my right and see Fabian still sitting beside me. I'm sure he feels guilty about letting me see Alfie…

Without thinking, I simply lean over, and rest my head on his shoulder. He responds by draping his arm around my shoulders, and hugging me against him.

"I…I'm s-sorry-y…I-I s-should've listened t-to y-you." I stammer.

He rubs my shoulders in comfort. "It's okay. I understand your logic completely. If you can, try not to beat yourself up over it."

KT scoots closer to me, and rubs my arm.

"I don't know if you heard me earlier, but I saw him too," she says, "I know exactly how you feel. Just try to focus on your last positive memory of him."

"That's how I've been getting by," Patricia adds, "I've just been thinking about all the stupid things he used to do: the pranks he'd pull, the jokes he made, and how comforting he could be…it doesn't numb the pain completely, but it has helped."

I glance over at her, surprised at how nice she's being. When I see that she's sitting on Eddie's lap, I smile; they're soooooooooo cute together!

"I've been reading some texts from him on my phone," Eddie says, "We used to just text each other random memes and jokes from the internet all the time. Going back and re-reading them makes me feel better…it doesn't distract me completely, but it is comforting."

I let all of their advice sink in, and try think about some of my happier memories of Alfie. I think about the dates he took me on, the Sibuna mysteries, the pranks he pulled on Jerome, how much he made me laugh…it breaks my heart to know that I'll never make anymore memories with him, but after several minutes of thinking, I do feel myself start to calm down.

"See, it does help, doesn't it?" Fabian asks.

I nod, and squeeze his hand. "I-it does…thanks guys."

"Of course."

"You're welcome."

"Anytime."

"Sure."

I shrug, and sit up from Fabian's shoulder.

"How much longer do you guys think we have to stay here?" I wonder.

"Well, it's not over until 8:00, and it's only 5:00…I'd feel bad if we left early." Patricia replies.

"We could take a break and go down to Charlie and Noah's funerals," Fabian suggests, "We don't have to look at them, but we could at least tell everyone from Hathor House that we're in their corner."

KT nods enthusiastically. "Yeah, I feel like we should do that."

I wipe my remaining tears away, and slip my shoes back on.

"I'm fine with that. Let's get going, before it gets to crowded." I murmur.

We all stand up from the couch, and walk toward the stairs.

(Jerome's P.O.V.)

Joy squeezes my hand tightly.

"Are you sure you want to do this, love?" she asks.

I nod. I have to see him one more time. I have to.

"Yeah, let's go."

We walk into the small room where his coffin is. The walls are covered in a blue paisley wall paper, and the carpet is a weird shade turquoise. Nothing is in the room except for Alfie's casket, which is surrounded by two tall lamps, and several bouquets of flowers.

We're not even up to his side yet and I already want to throw up.

He looks terrible; absolutely, whole-heartedly, terrible.

As we get closer to him, Joy gasps.

Every visible part of his skin has some sort of bruise or scrape on it, varying in severity; he just looks dead.

"Oh my god." Joy breathes.

I drop to my knees, and rest on the beam before the casket that people pray on. I don't know how long I can kneel here and look at this; I have one thing to say, and then I'm leaving.

"Alfie," I start, "I don't know where you are now, or if you can even hear me, but…I just…I just have to tell you I'm sorry. I'm sorry for all the things I made you do that you weren't comfortable with when we were at our prime. I'm sorry for everything I put you through with Rufus. I'm sorry for dating Willow while I was with Mara, and dangling her in front of you when deep down I knew you wanted to be with her. I'm sorry for bullying Eddie so bad that I made you hate me as a result. I'm sorry for not trying harder to repair our friendship. Finally, I'm sorry that I was ever such a horrible friend to you. In reality, I didn't deserve your loyalty, or your love…I spent more time being awful toward you than I did being kind. Nonetheless, I still enjoyed the fun times we had together…rooming with you, hanging out over the summer, sitting next to you in class…everything. You were my best friend, Alfie, and at one point, you were the single most important person in the world to me. Even though I wasn't the best to you, you were always there for me when I needed you, and you always picked me up when I was down— and that is something I'll never be able to thank you enough for. I wish everything was different: I wish you weren't dead, I wish I hadn't made the mistakes I made, and I wish we were still best friends. I know I can't take back anything I've done, but I can, or at least I think I can, tell you how sorry I am for everything, and that I will always treasure my time with you. I love you, A-Dog."

I gaze at him one last time, and then I stand up again. He honestly looks so bad, I feel nauseous.

Really, really nauseous.

"Jerome, that was beautiful—"

I turn around, and run out of the room. I dash to the nearest washroom, and fling the door open as fast as I can. I hurry into a stall, and immediately drop to my knees in front of a toilet. As soon as I open my mouth, vomit flows out of it.

The more I picture him in my mind, the more sick I get. Eventually, I feel someone start to rub my back as I continue; I don't have to look up to know that it's Joy.

After I've finished, I weakly raise one of my arms, and flush the toilet. I wipe my mouth, and then fall back into Joy's arms. Once I feel her grip on me, I break down and cry.

A/N: I hope you guys enjoyed that! I know things aren't the most exciting right now, but trust me, Nina's presence is going to make things pick up very very soon…with that being said, I meant to mention before, I loooooved hearing your thoughts about her in your last reviews! I don't want to spoil anything, but let me leave you with this: all of your questions will be answered within the next few chapters…

Also, I wanted to take the time to respond to one review in particular from a guest user, who asked if Fabian and Eddie were going to get together in later chapters…the answer to that is NO! I know they seem really cuddly (and gay, even), but I base their friendship around my relationship with my best friends, and we're like that IRL (I know it's more common for girls to be platonic than boys, but I don't like to abide by gender stereotypes so…). I'll tone it down for a bit now just to avoid anymore confusion, but I just wanted to address that.

Anyway, thank you guys so much for reading, and continuing to follow me and this story, despite my absence— it means more to me than I could ever possibly explain. If you could, please please pleaaaase review on these two chapters— I love hearing from you guys soooo much! I'll update again as soon as I can! Thanks!