Hey there, all! Yes. I finally updated. And I actually lied about the updates being less sporadic. I feel like such a horrible person. It turns out that my new school is a lot harder than my old school, especially when I had to do my summer homework in five days when everyone else got the whole summer to do it. Unfortunately, we are not going to follow Shikamaru and Sakura, but when I finish this story and I get enough requests I might make a oneshot about them or something. But here's the next chapter! Enjoy!
Disclaimer: Standard Mode.
Jiraiya had dismissed both Shikamaru and Sakura after that, saying something about how he'll contact them at a later date.
He turned to face Hinata and Sasuke. "Now, as for you two, well, the mission date has been changed. Your plane is boarding in…five minutes." He stated the fact with obvious glee, almost like their physical discomfort made him happy. "Here are your mission folders. Tickets are in your folders, good luck!" Jiraiya bolted.
Sasuke almost stood in protest because, fuck, girls can't pack all their shit in just five minutes! God, the stupid sadist was actually trying to make him fail this mission. Unless…
Sasuke relaxed back into his chair, plan formulating in his head.
He could ditch the stupid girl and if the airplane took off without her, he could work alone. Working alone would be ideal, after all. He already had his stuff packed. All he would need to do would be to go get it.
Sasuke smirked.
Working alone was for the best. In the field you can only trust yourself. Plus she probably has a stupid crush on him anyway. He could almost see her little lungs hyperventilating at the thought of spending an unlimited amount of time with him.
He reached over and grabbed a mission folder, slightly caressing the edges of the manila container almost lovingly. Sasuke was still slightly lost in his thoughts as Hinata began to speak to him in her annoyingly soft voice.
"Um…excuse m-me, Uchiha-san," her voice trailed off as Sasuke made no movement. "U-Uchiha-san," she tried again. No answer. "U-Uchiha-san!" she cried, Sasuke finally snapping out of his dream of working alone.
"What?" Sasuke was slightly annoyed. Imagine having to cut off your wonderful dream involving you working by yourself by the annoying twit you were going to ditch in just one minute.
"W-Well, I'm already p-packed. S-so if we could just s-swing by my apartment and…"
Sasuke huffed. "We have to pick up my stuff first." Standing, he moved to stride out the door, intending to, once again, leave Hinata behind. However, to his dismay Hinata picked up her own identical folder and scurried behind him.
Sasuke sighed. Maybe she was a little more efficient than he gave her credit for, but she was still no where near his level.
It wasn't that she disliked Sasuke; it was just that something about him just made her want to scream in frustration.
Maybe it was the way that he rejected both Sakura and Ino. Yes, they shouldn't have latched onto him, but maybe he could have told them something else beside, "You two are so fucking annoying. Get the hell away from me."
Or maybe it was because he acts like he's so much better than everyone else. Everyone else is just there to get in the way between him and whatever he wants at the time. Almost like a spoiled child.
Or perhaps it was the fact that he could so easily fit into the role of the Prince who saves the Princess. He had all the qualification: extremely attractive, tall, and fit with broad shoulders plus, being a spy, he was trained in the art of combat.
Sasuke, however, did not see it fit to play this prince role and instead acted the way the villain does or the Prince before his character development: arrogant, rude, and manipulative. It didn't help that he didn't seem very loyal.
Okay, so maybe she did dislike Uchiha Sasuke. Just a little.
But one really cannot blame her for disliking such a horrible man. He probably thought she was incompetent, after all. It really wasn't her fault for being slightly submissive to people with over inflated egos – it was just the way she grew up.
Hinata was currently following him through the labyrinthine halls of the agency. Sure she could have made it out herself, but being at the airplane to take them to their destination boarded in five minutes she really didn't want to get lost.
"Ex-excuse me, Uchiha-san, b-but I was won-wondering if we were to t-take two s-separate cabs? We m-might be late if we t-take just o-one."
He grunted.
Oh great, another one of those silly male grunting answers. As if having her grunting cousin wasn't enough. It really is good that she grew up around Neji-nii because if she hadn't she wouldn't have been able to tell what he was saying. "O-okay, I'll s-see you at th-the a-airport."
She bolted out the door. Was it just her, or was the air around him almost suffocating?
Hinata picked up her suitcase by the handle and began carrying it to the check in center where she assumed she would meet Sasuke. She was already in character physically and almost mentally. Her ticket said that her name was Nakahito, Hitomi formally of the Takuma family and a quick glance at her portfolio said Uchiha-san was to be her husband, though how anyone would be able to stand being married to that icicle was questionable. Flipping open her portfolio to pass the time, she quickly read more about herself. Her hobbies included cooking, cleaning, and taking long baths. Not much depth, but that just gave her more of a free range to create her.
As for appearance and general personality, Hitomi was described as being quite, but confident, short, and sincere with long black hair and dark brown eyes.
All of these qualities were going to be very easy and natural for Hinata as she normally did them anyways, the toughest parts were going to be the eyes, hair, and confidence. The hair mostly because she would have to wear the wig for an extended period of time and, should the event arise, put it on quickly. And she could see why the eye color was necessary to hide as silver eyes were not that common and Hitomi was supposed to be "an average housewife". The confidence, well, that was pretty self explanatory if you knew Hinata at all.
Though the random red scribble of 'sexy' in between average and housewife did throw her off a bit. Was she supposed to be normal? Or was she supposed to be sexy? In the end normal won the pick because if she was trying to keep a low profile and gain people's trust, she couldn't be sexy now, could she. Being sexy came with the preconception of evil, sinful things, such as Grendel's mother in the movie adaptation of the epic poem Beowulf, no matter how nice she was.
Besides, she was pretty sure that if she even tried being sexy she'd just come off as looking constipated. Or just the opposite.
Hinata heaved a sigh and looked at her watch. She was expecting Uchiha-san to burst through the automatic doors any second now, giving her one of his surely patented glares of death, doom, depression, and all things that started with the letter 'D' and were despicable.
The doors burst open as Uchiha, Sasuke came strolling through, rolls of doom and domination falling from him with each step he took. He glared at her as she stood there waiting for him. He grunted something that sounded similar to 'Oh joy, you're here' before stalking off to get in line to check in. Hinata mutely followed behind, sliding back into her subordinate role when a sudden thought occurred to her: Hinata disliked the letter 'D' very much.
The woman in front of him was wearing too much make-up. If make up could be used as food, between her mascara caked eyelashes and the annoyingly thick amount of foundation she had applied you could feed the entire country of Congo, including the rumored dinosaurs that lived there, and still have enough for seconds. She batted her disgusting lashes at him in an attempt to flirt.
"Hey there," she purred, looking at him from beneath her lashes, "what's your name?" She was slightly leaning on the counter, what little cleavage showed in her uniform was wedged between her two arms in an attempt to make them look bigger.
"Nakahito, Sadao." Sasuke's short reply came before quickly adding, "And my wife, Hitomi" He grabbed Hinata's arm sharply before yanking her next to him. The woman behind the counter's face dropped as she stopped pushing her cleavage to unnecessary heights. She dully typed in the characters, printed out the tickets and handed them to him.
"Have a nice flight," she mumbled glumly before attending to the next person in line with the same enthusiasm as she gave them their goodbyes in.
Maybe having a wife wasn't such a bad idea after all. If she wasn't competent he could always just use her as a female shield against other females.
The city was just what he expected: smelly, gray, and crowded. It was in these kinds of conditions that gangs formed. Obviously there was a hierarchical system to the gangs in this city as well as in others. His job is to figure out the top one, the King, if you will, and infiltrate it and bring back information so the agency could bring it down. Basically, find the largest one, become a member, rise in ranks, find out the activities the gang was doing, report, go home.
Fairly simple, but unfortunately this gang was no ordinary gang. If it were a normal gang then the police would have brought it down long ago, however, not only has this gang managed to corrupt the judicial system, it also acts like an agency.
A spy agency and that, in its self, is curious enough for Jiraiya to want to figure out what the hell is going on, which is why he sent in Sasuke, probably his best spy below the age of 25, second best below the age of 30.
As to why Sasuke was actually looking forward to this mission, well, that's a completely different story. A different story that just doesn't need to come up right now.
Sasuke felt a slight tug on his shirt. "Sadao-kun? M-maybe we should g-get a t-taxi to go to our apartment?" Sasuke heaved a sigh. Still the stuttering nutcase. He had half hoped that once the mission started she'd become slightly less…annoying in her speech. His wish was in vain though as she still stuttered an blushed like normal.
He hummed in response before tucking her arm in his and guiding her down the airport hallway towards the exit, luggage in tow. He didn't really enjoy this small, under-confident girl, but he supposed it could have been worse.
Sasuke heaved a sigh. Yes, he could have had that pink-haired girl whose sole existence seemed to hinge on his every word. No doubt she would probably have raped him in his sleep several times over the duration of this mission. Hinata was definitely the safer choice.
He gritted his teeth. Sasuke supposed he should at least thank her in some small way. "Hitomi, koi," he said lowly, slightly embarrassed at having to act in love, "let me take your bag for you."
"Ah! Um, th-thank you for your k-kindness, but…" Hinata trailed off as Sasuke stopped before her, grabbing her luggage bag out of her hands and walking off again towards the exit.
"We're married now," he called back, "this is what a husband does, right?"
Hinata's blush slowly crept upon her face, but what it lacked in speed it made up for in brightness as her face was now doing a wonderful impression of the sun situated on the Japanese flag outside the window next to her. She ran to catch up to him, stopping two steps behind him.
A dark shadow moved silently down a narrow side street clutching onto a small brown package wrapped with twine twice around and intersecting in the middle. He had to make it back to his boss, or else face the consequence.
He didn't know what was in it. He didn't know the size; he didn't know the shape. He didn't know anything, and that's the way he preferred it.
All he was a lowly lackey doing lowly work in hopes of some day moving up the ranks and eventually, along the way, receive better pay. It wasn't easy work, but in this city it was either you're with the Boss and safe, or weren't and have to constantly watch your back.
As for the city, well, it was going down the tube. It was hard to meet anyone who wasn't involved with the Boss in this part of town. Those who didn't often were either children, visitors – not that there were many – or recently moved to the area from elsewhere in the city because of the failing economy. More often than not the new comers were swept into the Boss' greedy and always open hand fairly quickly. And as for those who resisted, well they often ceased to exist at all.
It was a dangerous game, but was well worth the danger; especially with the word that the Boss was looking for a successor. Someone to help run the organization while he was still around and, when he finally croaked – whether it be from natural causes or from having a little help along – to inherit the city.
Pretty much anyone could do it, he heard, just as long as they stayed true to the cause, whatever that was. The man clutched the package tighter as he splashed through a puddle. Maybe he might finally move up the ranks tonight from delivery boy to something grander. He could sure use the benefits. A door loomed in front of the man as he reached out to turn the handle and enter the meeting spot.
A small metallic click reached his ears as a small amount of pressure was exhorted onto the back of his head. "Give me the package." A gruff voice called out, pushing the gun harder on the man's skull. The man quickly turned around.
"I-I thought that the exchange place was in-inside." His stutter echoed off the damp walls and streets that made up the alley.
"Change of plans: hand it over now." The gunman demanded, now urgently pushing the gun into the man's frontal bone as the first man fumbled the package before pushing it over into the second man's hands as the first stuttered a joke about not getting the memo. The safety clicked back on and the gun stowed away in the gunman's jacket.
"D-do you think I could maybe, y'know, get a raise or something?" The man's confidence had grown an indescribable amount since the gun had been taken away as exemplified by the way he called to the second man as he strode away.
"Oh," the second man said as he stopped midway, "it must have been in the same memo you didn't get: you're not needed anymore." Swiftly the man pulled the gun back out, "Looks like you won't need that promotion after all." Safety off, the man shot twice before storing the weapon and continuing out of the alley. He scoffed. "Amateurs."
Baby Got Crack.
The man cackled evilly as he surveyed the work the small little device did. Entire buildings had crumbled and now lay in a pile beneath his feet and the sky was red and cloudy. He gave another cackle. Nothing could stop him now. Nothing! Not even-
"Oh my god, look! In the sky! It's two human-shaped balloons!"
"No!! It's the Wonder Twins!"
"No! You're both wrong it's the Awkward Avengers of Justice!" The two superheroes landed on a piece of rubble, their matching suits glistening in the sun which had appeared out of no where.
"No!" Shrieked the villain, "You'll never defeat me, A.A.J.'s! NEVER!" The two silently stared at him, the shorter, more feminine one cocking her head a little to the left where her partner stood in all his awkward glory. Her midnight colored locks moves slightly with the movement before settling back down. He hands were to her side as she stood there silently watching the villain.
Her companion slowly raised an eyebrow in reaction to the villain's outraged cry, his arms also pinned to his side as he watched the villain with a blank look.
"Gee…this is getting really awkward, guys," the villain started out, his right hand slowly rubbing up and down his arm as his eyes avoided contact with the two heroes in front of him. "Could you two at least, I don't know, say something?"
The silent duo blinked at him as their stares continued to bore into his body. The villain's rubbing increased. Silence pervaded the air. No one dared make a sound or movement, the rats stayed in their holes and the wind refused to blow. Everything was at a standstill. Literally.
The villain gave out a cry of anguish, "I can't take it anymore," he screamed, "I just can't! It's so awkward! Oh the awkwardness is killing me! It burns so bad!! You win this round A-A-J, but I'll be back! And next time with music and sun glasses!" The villain threw the device at the duo, the throw reaching just short of hitting the still unmoving pair, before hopping into his hover-car and driving away.
The crowd erupted in screams and cheers in front of the pair as confetti rained down from the roof tops of the undestroyed buildings. The Awkward Avengers of Justice continue to stand, frozen in their positions, their backs to the ongoing party.. The partying slowly died down.
"Um, the dude's gone now. You can move and stuff." A voice called out from within the crowd. However, despite the assurance, the Awkward Avengers of Justice did not budge and the silence prevailed once again.
Suddenly, mass mutterings of awkwardness and arm rubbing broke out amongst the crowed as they slowly dissipated back from whence they came, leaving our two heroes standing in the same position, the wind slightly tugging on their darkly colored hair as the sunset in front of them.
"Mommy," a little girl asked, tugging on her mother's skirt, "do you think they'll ever move?"
"I don't know, sweet-heart, I just don't know." The mother replied slowly, shaking her head at the two figures facing the sunset.
(A/N: Yes! I did give Sasuke and Hinata superpowers!)
Look! The crack's back! Now: onward to reviews!
Madteen66: Well, if you're really curious you can always PM me and ask, or request a oneshot for either Sakura, Shikamaru, or two oneshots for both.
BlackRaven615: Really, you missed it? And you think it's humorous? You flatter me. I'm positively glowing.
WinterKaguya: Ha ha! Me too. What a scary thought if it turned out to be Rock Lee. Actually, not so scary as I can see myself writing that. God, I am a messed up person.
Joycie32: Thanks! I always love to hear good reviews on my works. Thanks for the review!
MoonIdiot: Yes. It shall! – evil cackle – Just wait for it...
Piisa: Yes! The real story begins and he shall see the sexy beast in Hinata! (Is it weird that I feel a bit like Rock Lee/Gai-sensei when I describe something as a beast?)
Heartl3ess-kawaii: Yes. You did get me to ramble; though my friends tell me that it's actually not that hard to do…I refuse to believe them though. We'll get to the fighting all in dear time m'girl. All in dear time.