A/N: It's been too long, sorryXP

Damn…I hate apologizingX3

10. Caramel

'Idiot! Look what you've become! You were supposed to kill him. You should dispose of him! Don't let yourself be affected by a dream, you want- no, you need this new world as badly as I need it! You'll rule, I'll rule over the world! Like a God, have you forgotten? No? Well, then, concentrate! You're going to kill that Ryuga-guy, and he'll die, together with L!'

Light sighed. Kira had been screaming at him since he'd seen Ryuga today. About the world they'd rule together, about the way they'd rule (mercilessly), and why L had to die. Thousands of reasons were screamed into Light's mind today, and it annoyed him to no end. It was his mind, he was going to rule. But still, he couldn't but obey. He knew that voice was his, that he was Kira and that voice would lead him to the ownership of the world. That very voice screamed at him every time he'd done something wrong in his own eyes, or when he had to do something difficult. It was just a voice Light was used to, only now it was more stubborn.

He obeyed and took a pen, to get the Death Note out of his drawer. He tried not to kick against it, it was his own brilliant imagination that created this construction, but it was terribly annoying to open it by putting a fucking pen in it. It reminded him of something that made his cheeks heat.

Ryuk snorted when he saw it. "I'm gonna search for apples…I just heard your mother come back from the groceries store."

Light didn't hear it.

"You aren't."

"Yes, I am."

"You're not."

"I believe I just said I am."

Light tried not to gape at the young man he was currently walking next to. University had started, and he and Ryuga were together all the time, almost…naturally. He just was there all the time, to keep an eye on Light, he said, but Light automatically walked at him too when he saw him. It was interesting to guess what Ryuga was thinking.

'He's lying again, he can't be twenty-five…I would've believed it if he'd said he was seventeen! But why would he lie about this…? To make it easier to believe he is L…? But he's a foreigner, I don't know much about how old foreigners look when they're twenty-five, maybe it's true… No, he's lying, I'm sure.'

Light put a fake smile on his face. "Well, it looks like I'm the younger one here, isn't it?"

The corners of Ryuga's mouth twitched, causing Light to look at his lips again. "I guess so. I'll make sure nothing but the death sentence happens to Yagami-kun."

Light's eyes shot open. What was he saying?

"Excuse me?"

Ryuga smirked. "You are Kira, aren't you? Nothing should happen to Kira before he is sentenced to death. You know that story where a doctor and a nurse were once accused of murder? They had to sentence someone to death, when there appeared to be a bubble in the poison used to kill the delinquent. He got a heart attack because of the bubble; he hadn't died because of the injection. If a murderer dies in a different way than he should, the ones who caught him are left with the problems. Just when we wanted to dispose of such problems, isn't it..?"

Light didn't know why, and Kira laughed maniacally in the back of his head because he found it funny, but he was hurt. Dispose of him? So Ryuga wasn't only hired to investigate him, he also had to keep him alive to make sure he could be sentenced to death? That was so…mean! He knew he was Kira, but he still didn't want others to think of him like that (except from when they're pro-Kira, of course). This just…hurt him.

And yes, he knew that story.

They walked to the tennis field. Class was over, and Ryuga wanted to play tennis with him. Light wondered if that guy knew he'd been the best of Japan's scholars once. He probably sucked at it, with those thin wrists. They changed clothes (meaning: only Light, Ryuga only put on tennis shoes…How was he going to play tennis in those baggy jeans…?), and Light felt the gazes on him of the other guys who'd just sprinted around the campus and needed to shower. He wondered if Ryuga was looking at him…Should he have shaved his armpits…?

Kira maniacally laughed at him. Ryuga was going to die, the last thing he'd think would NOT be about Light's armpits, for sure. They entered the tennis field and started playing. Ryuga was good, Light couldn't deny it. He had to run hard and to slam the ball back hard enough to make sure his racket wouldn't be blown away by the balls Ryuga sent his way. He had to admit that this felt good. He hadn't fought this hard, physically, since the last tennis championship he'd joined.

It was truly interesting to see Ryuga work this hard, to see him run, almost dive in the direction Light slammed the balls to. He held his racket in a strange way, but he definitely succeeded in speeding the balls up so hard that Light actually felt every single muscle in his shoulder. It was a miracle his pants didn't fall off his narrow hips, Light saw how loose his pants were when Ryuga lifted his arms, and with that his shirt. For one moment, Light's gaze was caught by the shape of his abdomen, visible because his underwear was also too wide. A ball almost hit his face, but missed him.

Kira took over again, and made Ryuga bite the dust.

It was over too soon, and he shook Ryuga's hand, which was warm from the hard match. It was softer than expected, and Light noticed Ryuga wasn't sweating much. How did he do that, Light was drenched in sweat…? The raven's hair was more messy than usual and his chest heaved a little. They walked away from the crowd, talked about the Kira-case, and Ryuga announced he suspected Light of being Kira…If he was hired by L, either he or L (or both) had to be pretty good at thinking forward.

After a good shower in the way too filthy showers of the university (eww), Light was on his way to his favorite café with Ryuga. It was a fifteen-minute-walk, and they chatted about nothing in particular. Ryuga was more than the idiot he looked like at first sight…Had L hired him because he was good at keeping a conversation going with a suspected genius-murderer…? Because he did seem pretty good at it. Maybe he indeed was smart, he sounded like it and Light started wondering why L would send someone stupid to catch Kira. Or maybe he was L. He was seven years older than Light had estimated him, it was possible. L or not, Light liked talking to him, it felt natural. He didn't have to act smart or stupid around this guy. Of course, he had to make sure he said nothing incriminating, but Light was a genius. He could to that. Had Light not been Kira, he would've really liked this.

But he was Kira, and Ryuga was going to die. Simple as that.

Ryuga paid for their coffee and a piece of cake for himself (Light didn't want to, he didn't want to get fat, hell no), and Light let him because he had to make sure Light was fine. He'd be paid for that, and if he was L, he must have a lot of money on him…Light wasn't going to pay for coffee and cake for someone who could buy it himself.

Of course the conversation about Kira would start, and it was a mind battle Light secretly enjoyed. Ryuga was smart, and the possibility that he was L grew with the minute. Light had often wondered how it would be to talk to L, and he never really expected it would be while he was suspected from genocide, but it was, in some way, like he'd thought it would be. It was a battle of wits, two brilliant minds thinking at the same level. Light liked Ryuga while Kira laughed at L. Would it also be the other way round…? Light wondered.

The geniuses' mind games were interrupted suddenly when Ryuga's phone rang.

A heart attack? How…?

His Dad…

Light stared outside of the fast-driving limousine with a metal strap wound tightly around his heart. His mother just called, his Dad had a heart attack, they were trying to save him, but she hadn't heard anything from him… His Dad, would he…? No, Light didn't want to miss him, he loved him too much! His father! He felt tears prick behind his eyes, but he didn't allow himself to let them roll. Ryuga sat next to him and seemed anxious too, though it was more something Light felt than an expression on his still blank turned his gaze away from him and blinked violently, to force the upcoming tears away. Kira screamed it didn't matter, it was only his father, he was only weak, but Light didn't listen to him and prayed his Dad was doing fine. 'Please, let him be alright…'

Finally they arrived at the hospital, and Light wanted to run in to see his Dad, but something stopped him. He waited for Ryuga and they walked quickly into the building, to be led to the second floor of the hospital. His heart cried in relief when he saw his father's face alive, but he sat down calmly, Ryuga crouching on the chair next to him. His mother eyed Ryuga suspiciously, but he didn't pay attention to her.

Half an hour later he stood outside again, watching as Ryuga drove away. So he indeed was L. This was the guy Light had looked up to all the time. He didn't feel anything by it. Not excited or disappointed, just…He met L, and L was a messed-up smartass who happened to be good at mind games. Not like Light had expected. He didn't really know how he'd imagined L before, but it hadn't been like this, he was sure.

He walked home with Ryuk floating behind him, and his thoughts boiled around in his head. His Dad was going to be fine, so he'd get to see the new world Light was building for people like him. He'd said Kira was doomed to be unhappy, but...Was that true? He was happy he could create a new world like this, for good people, and he was thankful for the power thrown into his hands. He didn't feel sick anymore when he killed, like he'd done in the beginning. He could eat again, he could think clear (which was necessary with L around) and he could enjoy little things, like the sakura touching his face as he walked. The new world was in his hands, and he'd soon rule over it like a God...All he had to do was to kill L.

'But I don't want to.'

Light momentarily stopped and blinked. What did he just think...? He didn't want to kill L...? But it was necessary for the new world. L's life would be sacrificed for a greater good, he should be thankful. Ryuk chuckled and asked Light what was wrong, and Light blinked again and shook his head.

"Nothing, Ryuk."

"Huhuhu..."

Why did he hesitate to kill L? Why did he feel wrong thinking about that? The Dream crossed Light's mind, but he pushed it away. Maybe he just felt bad about killing the person he'd looked up to all his life. He now knew the person behind all the stories, and he indeed was surprised, but he was still L. The L Light had drawn once. The childish-looking piece of art hung in the hall of his home, L was still smirking, holding the same pipe, with the same bad English Light never dared to really look at. Bags or not, this guy was still L, and now that Light had seen him, he started hesitating over if he wanted to kill him.

Kira almost died from laughter, and Light felt a light pang of humiliation when he heard it. No, he was Kira now, he was going to kill L, idol or not. L wanted to kill him, after all, it was L or Kira. Ryuga or Light. The last thing bothered Light too, for some reason.

He eventually stopped thinking about if he wanted to kill L or not (NOT), because Kira made him feel too humiliated. This was about the new world; Kira would rule…Kira would become God. Light would become God.

He sighed. Ryuga's eyes haunted him in the back of his mind.

Light-kun…

Light-kun was cute.

L smiled a little behind his cup of tea when he thought of the person he talked to today. L had been terribly worried about Soichiro too, but he'd done so well L decided he'd soon be better. Light's face during the ride to the hospital had been…vulnerable. He'd really looked worried, and L had noticed he'd blinked all the time, so that his wet eyes wouldn't betray him. It was hard to hide things like that from L, though, and he'd been so happy to see Light's vulnerable side. It attracted him. Kira hadn't completely wasted Light yet. As soon as L knew how Kira killed, would he try to find a way to kill Kira without killing Light. He wanted to see that cuteness more often.

Was it actually weird to think of someone of the same gender as 'cute'…? L decided everyone would think Light was cute, and didn't pay any more attention to it. He felt affection for Light, even more than before, after he'd seen those small tears today. Light was a bit of a crybaby…? L liked the idea. It was logical to feel affection for someone like that, someone who leveled L and he could relate to that well. Of course, he had people he could relate to, but Light was…different. The others he could relate to were more like family to him, Light came pretty close to what L considered a 'friend'; someone you could relate to and talk with, while he didn't have to act like someone else (meaning: more stupid than he actually was). The same went for Mello and the others, but they were like family. L never had that kind of connection with someone who was for about his (mental) age.

He gulped all the tea down his throat and stood up to get himself some more. Light was cute, so cute it filled L's heart with a warm feeling that made him want to sing, and a tie in his stomach that told him he felt more for Light than only affection.

Attraction…?

Light had a great body, and his eyes…L loved looking at them. But that make him feel attracted to Light…? The things he loved about Light were his appearance, his intelligence and also the soft side of Light that came to the surface every now and then. His personality, little traits Light would've had without Kira too, probably…L was determined to find out. He wanted to see Light and talk to him, and be close to him. He wanted to touch him, he had to know if Light's hair smelled as nice as the coconut shampoo he used (L had bought a bottle, just for the coconut scent. It just…wasn't the same), he wouldn't mind learning more about Light's body either.

These thoughts had always disgusted him when they were about most others.

L smiled.

Maybe he indeed felt attracted to Light.

That night, Light wasn't only haunted by Ryuga's eyes, but his whole appearance. The same dreams he always had about men he looked up to. Ryuga had appeared again, naked this time, and Light had noticed a slender frame and the same white skin as always. Ryuga smiled darkly and flipped Light to his stomach, spread Light's butt cheeks apart and did him. It was so realistic Light could only conclude he somehow ended up with Ryuga in some strange room with only sheets and darkness. Everything felt so real; Ryuga's hips slapping against Light's butt, his fingers holding Light's hips and pressing into the skin, the sheets underneath Light, even the feeling of Ryuga moving inside of him. The tension building up in his lower regions, his own throbbing hardness and the eventual release. It was all real.

After he came, Ryuga disappeared. Light looked around to see if he was there, but he couldn't find him. Ryuga. L.

Kira laughed at him from the back of his head. It didn't matter what Light dreamt. Ryuga would die soon.

Ping.

Mello blinked.

'Ping'.

What was 'ping' supposed to mean…?

It was almost seven o'clock in the morning; Matt was still asleep next to him, snoring lightly and soft hairs growing on his upper lip needing to be shaved off. Mello had woken up just before the alarm would go off, and he shut it down before it actually would.

Why he hadn't woken up because of the alarm…?

He'd felt that 'ping' in the back of his mind. Almost a signal from the universe…

Suddenly, his eyes grew big, twice their normal size, and his lips formed an 'o'. He rushed to his mobile phone, grabbed it and dialed the number that connected L to Wammy's.

"Ryuzaki."

"L, it's me, Mello!"

Behind Mello, Matt mumbled something and shifted in his sleep. Mello didn't pay attention to it.

"Mello? Hello, happy to hear from you. How are you?"

Mello told him about the 'ping' he just felt in his head that it woke him up and that he wanted to know if it had something to do with a brunet. He heard L turn a little nervous, and kept on asking until L admitted the main suspect in the case was a brunet. After asking a little further, Mello knew that this Kira-suspect (meaning he was Kira, L was never wrong) was a young, pretty and genius brunet, smartest kid of his age in Japan, and after pushing so far that L's voice had became completely monotone, he knew L had watched him shower, and that he used silk shower gel and coconut shampoo.

"L, that's great!"

"…Why is the fact that Kira uses coconut shampoo great…?"

"You know what I mean, remember I said Kira had to be a hot and smart brunet? We found our fourth brother, L! Go and take his ass, it's yours!"

"…Mello…"

"What?"

"You know it's inappropriate to do things like that with a suspect?"

Mello laughed and pointed at his phone, though he knew L couldn't see it. Matt, who had stood up and was now bare-chested, stalked over to Mello and hugged him from behind. Mello soothed his arm. Matt was cuddly and the blond didn't dislike it at all.

"Aww, do you find it a pity? C'mon, we all know that L and Kira are meant to be together. Why on earth don't you freaking take him?"

L clacked with his tongue (he was gay, Mello had always known it, it was so damn clear from only his freakin' manners) and seemed to search for the right answer, but apparently couldn't find it, because he changed the subject.

"How are Matt and Near actually doing…?"

When he told L about some stupid things Near had done, Matt had talked to L for a while too and told about what happened to a kid in Wammy's who'd used a knife to shave himself, they hung up. Mello glanced at the clock. Almost nine o'clock. They had to hurry up, they were late for class and teachers seemed suspicious about him and Matt. They should be… heh.

L, however, was so hard in denial.

Mello now had something funny to tease Near with.

Another guy…Why was he there? The police shouldn't do anything by now…

Misa put the binoculars away as she pulled out a pen. 'Hirokazu Ukita' was about to die, how stupid, now he had to die…After forty seconds, while he was trying to get in the building of Sakura TV, he fell down on his knees. He was killed. His fault, he shouldn't have been against Kira…

Misa giggled and wondered if Kira was watching TV right now. Would he see it…? Maybe he'd try to contact Misa! She squealed and looked through the binoculars. They were carrying the body away. Misa had murdered someone, but that was for Kira, and Kira killed for the good. So Misa was doing good too.

She smiled at Rem, who was watching everything too, and touched the notebook next to her.

She'd find Kira, and thank him for avenging her parents' death.

A second Kira. What. The Fuck.

L rolled his eyes and took a sip from the twelfth cup of coffee today. His brain was still filled with clouds, but he could think clear enough to see this hadn't been the work of Kira himself (Light wouldn't be so stupid to destroy Kira's reputation like that). Choosing victims like that, idiots who only showed up in women's magazines…

He tilted his head to the side when he read the article about some drug addict who was popular in a few TV-shows, searched on his laptop if his drugs-incident was mentioned somewhere before Kira killed him and immediately decided this had to be either a woman or a gay guy. No one else would ever watch 'Fruity Celebs, Juicy Gossip'.

…Another gay guy than Yagami Light, Light would never choose a victim like that to represent Kira. Though L wouldn't be surprised if he read the EIGHTEEN too…

He took the March-issue from the EIGHTEEN and looked through it. His eye rested on the face of a blonde girl in a Gothic Lolita outfit. 'Misamisa'. He already figured Misamisa could possibly the second Kira; Her parents' murderer was killed by Kira, and Amane just went to Tokyo. She had a motive to support Kira, he was her hero, after all.

He put the issue away and decided that he first needed proof. He took the April issue and read both his and Kira's horoscope. Apparently L had to take a walk outside to clear his mind and think of new ideas, and Kira had to watch out for a Capricorn-stalker. He smirked. Misa Amane was a Capricorn.

Sure. L didn't believe those horoscopes, they were never true.

Nonetheless, half an hour later he was strolling around in Tokyo's streets, when the idea to add Yagami Light to the investigation team tomorrow entered his mind. Why hadn't he thought about that the last few days…? Now he felt stupid. It was probably because the second Kira wanted him dead and found a brilliant way to make him do that. L wasn't egoistic enough to let all those people die for him, but knowing that there was a chance that he was going to die made him restless. Somewhere he knew that he'd find a way to escape it, but he was once again reminded at the fact that he was mortal too, and he didn't want to be reminded at it in a way like this. He hated the feeling of Death's hot breath in his neck; he'd felt it so many times and he always found a way to escape, but he still hated the feeling with all his (still pounding) heart.

One thing he could do was showing his face to the world and convince the Kira's that they shouldn't kill him, for a reason L hadn't thought of yet. He was never going to corporate with them…

…Maybe that was a thing he could do, making them think he was going to corporate with them by supplying them information. Sure he could give them false information… He could tell the most important people he worked together with that he was actually trying to catch them, but of course this would make the world think he was lame.

…They'd probably think that the moment they saw he wasn't the middle-aged moustache man everyone imagined him to be. Sigh…

He didn't want to die, he wanted to see Mello and the others from Wammy's again, and he had to save Light. He couldn't die now.

L's thoughts immediately jumped back to Light. What would happen if he'd join the team? L would get more chances to talk to him and maybe save him from Kira, and L would get to know more about Light himself, and maybe smell his hair, out of curiosity. He wished to see him and talk to him again, to look into those amazing eyes and see if Light was there, if he could break through Kira and see the person the beautiful body belonged to behind those eyes.

He blinked. He shouldn't think like this. He felt attracted to Light, but he was still convinced of the fact that it was a trick his mind was playing on him, and that it was because he wanted to save Light from Kira because it would be a waste to waste him. Nothing more…

He really hoped Light would start helping them soon. Soichiro would come back that afternoon, L would ask him to call Light. Maybe he'd see him this evening…

When he walked in again, he read his horoscope again. He indeed had walked outside, his mind felt a lot clearer and he even thought of new ideas. Nothing special. Nothing special…

The pretty face of Misa Amane presented the Second Kira's from now on.