A/N: Hey everyone, I finally got the tenth chapter up. A little depressing maybe, but I hope you'll still continue to read this fic!

Disclaimer: I don't own anyone or anything from GS/GSD

Chapter 10: A hole in my Heart

The others were really pleased with our catch and decided that we didn't need to just live only on fruits and vegetables. "I wish we had a bow and arrow; I'm quite skilled with archery," I said.

Kira shrugged. "We'll we can always try and make some tools. That would make things a lot easier for us," he had said as he and the others had gotten back with bits of food.

So now here I am with a piece of branch that was quite bendy. Making a bow shouldn't be too hard, right? WRONG! I had took a piece of nylon rope that we had and tried to bend the branch to get the rope to be tied on. When I had tried, the first time, the branch snapped. So I had to find another. The second time, the branch bounced away from my grip as I accidentally released it and I had to go after it, which was stupid. Now this was my third and hopefully last try! I bent the branch firmly as I tied the rope to both ends which eventually looked like a D. I grinned as I successfully did it and then I went off to find a narrow branch to act like an arrow. I held my fingers in place and I pulled the rope back. Unfortuantely this branch wasn't strong enough either. It snapped in half as soon as I tugged the rope and I groaned again. "JEEZ!!!" I said under my breath.

I heard soft chuckling and I didn't need to turn around to see who it was. "Go away, Athrun!" I muttered.

Athrun grinned playfully as he walked over to my side. He crouched down and inspected the two broken bits of wood. "Hmmm... I think this is too thin, but the length is quite good," he said thoughtfully.

I scowled at him. "I know that!" I muttered as I brushed off the dirt off my capris and stood up.

"Well then, want some help? I currently have nothing to do," he said with the same grin across his face.

I sighed. This guy in front of me could be quite annoying at times. "Okay," I said exasperatedly.

So we went searching for more branches that we could use. I was walking slowly while thinking about a lot of things had happened. I kept walking until out of nowhere someone jumped down in front of me. "BOO!"

I jumped back and stared at the person in front of me who was laughing hysterically. "Why you-!" I said angrily with a tint of red of embarassement creeping across my face.

Athrun grinned ear to ear. "Sorry about that! You were kinda spaced out. What were you thinking about?" he asked.

I shrugged as I walked on. "Nothing really... I just found it kinda ironic that all of this happened because of a few storms," I said quietly.

Athrun remained silent as he waited for me to say more. "The first storm started all of this. And we nearly died because of it. Then a second storm happened, which maybe saved us from suffering at the hands of the sea," I said softly.

Athrun nodded. "True. But maybe this was meant to happen. I may be wrong for saying this, afterall the tragedies we had, but I'm glad that I got a chance to meet you," he said seriously.

I blinked as I felt my face burn. But it all went away as I saw a grin on his face. "Because I never met someone who was so easy to tease!" he snickered.

My face was red once more, but this time, I was not blushing. I was angry, very angry. "ATHRUN ZALA! I'm going to KILL you!" I yelled as I ran after a laughing boy.

Meanwhile Dearka and the others stared into the forest in surprise. "Wow... sounds interesting huh...?" Dearka commented.

Mirillia laughed while Yzak replied, "Oh yeah, Asu-chan will get his head ripped off for sure,"

Even though I hate to admit it, chasing a coordinator around is very tiring. I fell to my knees panting heavily. Athrun looked back on me grinning tiredly. "Tired already?" he said.

I glared at him and saw that he was breathing slightly faster than his regular breathing pattern. Wait a minute! How and why would I recognize his breathing pattern?! Could it be-? I shook my head furiously. Nah, it couldn't be... "No way!" I panted.

Athrun kept his grin as he came over and patted my head. "Come on, let's continue our search for a suitable branch for your bow," he said.

I scowled at him but I gave an invisible smile. Athrun reminded me of my desceased twin in a way. "Alright, coming!" I shouted after him.

Athrun smiled back at me. "Y'know, you seemd quite troubled these days, if you ever need someone to talk to, you can talk to me," he said softly.

I blinked as a slight tint of red creeped across my face. "U-uh thanks, I'll d-do that," I stammered.

We continued to gather some branches and I looked up at the blazing tropical sun. This really seemed like a jungle safari. Birds were chirping and the insects- Oh the annoying insects! My legs were badly bitten and they itched like tomorrow. I scowled and wished I had some insect repellant. I looked down at the ground and saw a branch that looked sturdy enough for my bow. I held it up to Athrun. "Hey! How about this one?" I suggested.

Athrun turned around and took the branch. He bent it slightly a few times before nodding. "Yeah, this will do. Now, let's get back," he said.

We went back and this time with the help of Athrun, I finally made a good bow. It wasn't perfect, mind you, but it was the first bow I've ever made and I felt happy. "Now... all we need are some arrows," I murmured as I looked around.

Athrun shrugged. "Well we could use some of the branches and then look for some sharp stones. Then we could heat the stones in the fire making them hard and cool. After that, we could attach them somehow to the branches," he said.

I nodded but decided to do it later because the sun was high up in the sky and it was blazing hot in the tropical islands. "I'll gonna go cool myself down," Athrun said as he headed towards the water.

"Okay, I'm gonna go back under the shelther," I said and went over to Mir and Tolle.

Mirillia smiled as I came over. "Hey Cagalli, would you look after Tolle for a bit. I haven't really done anything and you and the others have been doing everything," she said apologetically.

I shrugged and returned her smile. I understood what she meant. You see, Mirillia wasn't the type that would feel okay letting the others do all the work. "Okay, I'll look after him," I said and Mir shot me a thankful grin.

She went off into the jungle, to find food, I presume. I looked down at the boy in front of me, who was perspiring quickly. "Tolle, you okay?" I asked as I felt his forehead.

I pulled back my hand in alarm as I felt that it was on fire. Tolle panted and gave me a small, tired smile. "Heh.. I-i'm okay.. though I can't move my body at all..." he whispered.

I frowned visibly. Tolle had risked his life for Kira when he pushed Kira out of the way from a falling beam and must have injured his spinal cord. "Well, do you want anything to drink or eat? I can get it for you," I offered.

Tolle gave me a small smile. "Nah... B-but perhaps you could bring me a cold cloth?" he asked.

I nodded and took the piece of cloth that Mir had ripped from her pant leg and soaked it with water. Then I went back to Tolle and laid it on his forehead. Tolle looked up at me and breathed heavily. "C-cagalli... will I be okay?" he asked in a small whisper.

I looked at him surprised. Tolle was usually quite cocky and was confident in himself, but at this moment, it seemed as if he was a small child asking his mother if he would get better. I swallowed painfully. Truthfully, I wasn't sure if he would be okay. His body was badly burned from what I had heard and he could no longer move any of his limbs. Tolle was really weak and needed a hospital fast! However, I knew he had to have some confidence in himself. I managed a weak smile. "Y-yeah, you'll be okay," I stammered.

Tolle smiled, but it was a sad one. "Really... I won't be, would I?" he whispered.

I shook my head furiously. I would not stand the thought of losing Tolle. He, I and Mirillia had been friends ever since elementary school and felt like he was part of my family. Furthermore, if he was gone, Mirillia would be torn to shreds. "Be confident and don't talk so much. You need to focus on getting better and get some more sleep," I said.

Tolle gave a small nod and closed his eyes. As soon as I was sure that he was fast asleep, I frowned. Tolle had to survive, he just have to! I took the cloth and wiped his face gently. He suffered during the heat of the day, but was always slightly better with the coolness of the night. Suddenly some objects fell into a pile in front of me. I stared, it was a pile of sticks and stones. Then I looked up to meet emerald orbs. "You said you needed materials to make an arrow right? Well I got some stuff that we may be able to use," said Athrun as he sat down next to me.

I nodded and started to shape the branches more into arrows. By the time we got at least one arrow done, it was nearly sunset. "Let's test it out," Athrun said as he got up.

I took the bow and the arrow and pulled the string back slightly. Then I released the string, sending the arrow whizzing past and hitting a tree. It wasn't the best, and the arrow was slightly off course, but I felt quite happy. Athrun frowned as he retrieved it. "Hmmm... the target was off. And there wasn't any wind, so what went wrong?" he murmured.

I was slightly puzzled as well. Then realization struck me. "Hey Athrun!" I called out.

Athrun turned his head towards me. "Yeah? What is it?" he asked.

"Would feathers make a difference in the flight?" I asked.

Athrun took the thought and pondered. "Possibly. But I doubt we'll find any feathers right at this moment since light is disappearing, but we'll look for some tomorrow, okay?" he decided.

I nodded. "Alright, sounds good. Anyway, we should get the fire going," I said as I went over to take the lighter.

Dinner was plain as usual and we had no more meat. We had finished the fish for lunch so all we had for dinner was some fruit. Shiho sighed. "I think we should have more varity. Tomorrow, we should go look for some source of meat. I hear there are plenty of birds here on this island. Maybe we could roast some," she said.

Everyone agreed. The only one who didn't eat was Tolle, and I felt that in his condition, I wouldn't have eaten either. Once we all cleaned up and sat down by the fire, Yzak yawned. "So who's going to take first watch?" he asked sleepily.

I looked back and forth. We were all quite tired after today's events. "I'll do it," Mir piped up.

We all looked at her with surprise. "Really?" I questionned.

Mir nodded. "Yeah, you're all quite tired and I haven't really done much so this is the least I can do," she said.

I looked to the others and then back to her. I supressed a yawn. "Well okay," I said and we all crawled underneath the shelter to get some rest.

However, before sleeping, I opened one eye to see Mirillia sittting alone by the fire, feeding it small pieces of wood. Then I looked beside Dearka to see Tolle sleeping somewhat easier than earlier. He stillhad his fever but seemed to be in less pain. My last thought before falling asleep was that I wished for Tolle's health to get better.

As morning came, the sun's rays went through my eyelids and I blinked several times before sitting up. I rubbed my eyes sleepily and looked around. Everyone was still asleep. I yawned and stood up. When I looked to the shore, I saw Kira was taking watch. I went up to him and yawned again. Kira turned around, surprised, but then smiled at me. "Good morning, Cagalli. Did you sleep well?" he asked.

I nodded and smoothed my rustled hair from sleeping on the cold, hard ground. "Slept very well. Mind if I join you? I asked.

"Oh yeah, sure," Kira said as he moved to make room for me to sit on the log. I sat down and looked out to the horizon. The waves were calm and there was even a gentle breeze. "Kira, I didn't really thank you for those times when you saved me back there. The encounter with that tree snake and the encounter with the sand pit," I said.

Kira looked at me in wonder but then shook his head gently. "You don't have to thank me. While we are here, we should look out for one another," he replied.

I said nothing as I replayed his words in my head, feeling reassured by his voice. He also reminded me of my brother with his kindness and wisdom. Kira also talked like Tatsuya as well. They both shared the same gentle lavandar eyees but Tatsuya was dead, whether I would like to admit it or not. Besides, Tatsuya was sandy blonde, not brunette. Kira looked at me. "You knew Tolle for a long time, haven't you?" he stated.

I nodded. "Yes, he, Mir and I have been friends for a long time. He's like family to me," I answered.

Kira nodded slowly. "So... do you blame me for Tolle's condition?" he asked quietly.

I stared at him in shock. "W-what?!" I stammered.

Kira sadly looked out to sea. "It was my fault that he's like this," he whispered.

His lavandar eyes look quite miserable and he even seemed on the verge of tears as well. I shook my head furiously. "No! I don't blame you! Neither does Mir or Tolle! It was an accident!" I insisted.

Kira said nothing. I could see that Kira, the usual came, troublefree boy blamed himself completely. "Look, Tolle will be okay! He's stronger than anyone I know and he'll pull through this. So you have to believe in him," I said determindly as I convinced myself with my words as well.

Kira gave me a small smile. "Thanks, Cags," he said.

"No problem-" I said but then shock hit me.

No one, and I mean no one had called me Cags except for a certain special person. My eyes widened in surprise. Was it coincidental? It must be. When I was about to question him about it, he was pointed out, "Hey look! The others are awake! Let's go discuss our day plan," he said as he stood up.

I felt disappointed for I had lost the chance to ask him at the moment. But I'll ask him later. "Okay! Coming!" I said as I ran up to him.

We discussed our day plans and we all broke up into our usual groups: Kira with Lacus, Dearka with Yzak and Shiho, Mirillia who was once more caring for Tolle and which leaves me with... you guessed it: ever cocky Athrun Zala! "Y'know, I hope there's a whole lot of food on this island because it doesn't seem that we'll be leaving anytime soon, huh?" I said quietly.

Athrun shrugged. "Yeah, if not... by the time they find us, we'd be cannibals by then," then he noticed my dark scowl. "Hey, hey! I was just joking!"

I rolled my eyes as I went back down to the shelter. I gave Mirillia a smile, but the weak smile she gave me in return alarmed me. "H-how's Tolle doing?" I asked.

Mirillia looked at me with wide eyes and looked as if she was close to tears. Tolle found breathing much harder than the day before and when I felt his forehead, it was a lot hotter than it usually was. Mirillia shook her head sadly. I knew she was frightened. Tolle really needed medical attention. Tolle opened his eyes but he still was in very much pain. "S-sorry to worry you g-guys..." he whispered hoarsely.

Mirillia laid a cool hand on his face. "Shhh.. don't speak.. Focus on getting better," she said with a barely manageable smile.

It pained me to see Mir like this, afterall she was very much like a sister to me and Tolle felt part of my family as well. I took the warm cloth and re-soaked it. Then I gently wiped his sweaty face. He was losing strength fast. I looked over to the few remaining supplies that we had. I had remembered that there were about three chocolate bars left and I took one. I broke it into small pieces. "Tolle, I know you feel miserable about eating, but you have to restore some of your strength. Here, have some chocolate," I said gently.

Tolle opened his mouth slightly and I popped it in. Tolle chewed weakly and managed to get some down into his system before choking on the rest. Alarmed, I quickly gave him some of the remaining spring water to drink. It took a while, but eventually, Tolle calmed down and went back to sleep. I felt horrible. Athrun must have noticed how I felt because he said, "Cagalli, do you want to go for a walk?" he asked as he grabbed my arm.

I nodded glumly and let him lead me. We walked through the 'pathways' that the others have made in silence. Athrun cleared his throat uncomfortably. "You know, that wasn't your fault," he said quietly.

I nodded sadly and sighed. "Yeah... I know. It just made me sad to think that even he wouldn't be able to get some chocolate down. I remember when we were younger as children, we always fought over chocolate and who would get the bigger piece," I said and Athrun looked at me with sadness.

I gave a bitter laugh. "Back then, I would win sometimes and then brag about it. But if I had known that this would be our destiny, then I would have gladly given Tolle every single piece of chocolate that I had had in this life," I said.

Athrun lowered his gaze to the ground and said nothing. I knew that he didn't know what to say at this moment for he felt quite bad as well.

Later on, when we got back, we had hear delighted cries of Lacus and Shiho who said that they had caught a bird. It was our first meat (excluding the fish) for the past week. Yzak and Dearka were in charge of plucking the feathers (and I had asked that they saved a few for my arrow) while Lacus and Shiho tended the fire. Mir looked after Tolle as usual while Athrun and I went fishing. I took my bow and arrow and decided to test it out with the fishing. The water was temperate and we stood in ankle-deep water that was still very close to land. "Hey Cagalli, why didn't you bring along the fishing kit?" Athrun questionned.

I grinned as I turned to face him. "We coulda done that, but there wasn't any bait. Anyway, I have an idea that I wanted to try out. I want you to wait for a fish to swim quite close to you and then I want you to scoop it up and then throw it into the air. That is what Shiho and I did yesterday. The only difference is that now, when I see the fish struggling in the air. I will release the arrow and send the fish to land. Sound good to you?" I asked.

Athrun thought it over and then nodded. "But since at the moment you have only one arrow and you don't have too much time to react, I suggest you be really careful before you release the arrow," he said.

I narrowed my eyes. "I know that! Besides, I have a good reaction time and I'm quite skilled with archery," I insisted.

Athrun nodded again. "Okay," he said as he stood ready.

I stood ready as well as I had my hands in position. I saw Athrun's eyes dart back and forth and saw that he was about to lunge. He scooped his hands underwater and then threw it all up along with a small silvery struggling fish. Something clicked in my mind and I quickly pulled and released the string and the bow, sending my arrow in a straight line. It went through the fish and then it flopped around helplessly on land. It kept on moving until lack of oxygen and then I cheered. "Yeah! And this time I didn't need to be soaked!" I exclaimed.

Athrun grinned mischeviously like a little boy. "So that would explain why you were dripping wet. I guess the fish got the better of you?" he said.

I punched him on the shoulder, while red with embarassement. "Oh shut up, Asu-chan!" I muttered as I dragged myself back to shore to claim my prize.

It was bigger than the last fish and looked tasty as well. The fish was as long as my elbow to the ends of my fingertips. It might even last long enough for everyone. I picked it up. "See, I was right, wasn't I? I got a perfect shot!" I said gleefully.

Athrun rolled his eyes but smiled. He ruffled my hair. "Yeah," he said as he placed his jacket on since it was getting colder.

I blushed slightly and then went over to Lacus and Shiho to show them what we caught. "Great! You got another fish! This will sure be a feast tonight!" Lacus said delightfully.

I nodded. "Yeah, the best meal within a week!" I added.

Yzak and Dearka came over, covered in feathers and blood. I stiffled a giggle as I saw them. "Here! Here's the stinkin' bird!" Yzak grumbled as he tossed Shiho the bird.

Shiho caught it and then set it down. "I think you two look good with the feathers," she said cheekily.

Yzak scowled and Dearka looked grumpy. They both stormed off saying that they were going to clean themselves a bit before dinner. I looked to the fire that was dying down to the lack of wood. "We need more wood to feed the fire," I pointed out.

Shiho and Lacus nodded. "We'll get it," they volunteered.

I nodded but I heard a third voice volunteer as well. I turned to see Mirillia standing up. "I'll help as well," she said.

I said nothing as she joined the other girls to help. I guess Tolle had told her not to worry about him. So that left me, Athrun and Tolle. "You go on and look after him, I'll tend to the fire," Athrun said as he took the lighter and a can of oil mixture.

I nodded as I went back under the shelter. "Hey Tolle, how are you now? Are you any better?" I asked gently.

Tolle whose head was resting on a bundle of old blankets, opened his eyes. "N-no... I think I'm getting worse..." his voice was barely louder than a whisper.

I was angry to see him like this. Tolle was always so strong, so confident. I shook my head. "No Tolle! Don't think that way!" I said determindly.

Athrun turned his head but other than that, paid no mind. Tolle gave a small chuckle. "C-Cagalli... you were always so c-cheer-ful.. ever since b-back when we were child-dren," he said in that same voice.

I was getting angry. "Why are you speaking this way?! You sound as if you are dying!" I shouted.

Athrun gave me a wierd look and Tolle gave a small sad smile. "My t-time is up... but I don't mind d-dying..." he said.

I wanted to slap this guy across the face. He was lying, wasn't he?! "Don't say things like that you bastard!" I yelled angrily. "You can't die now?! What about Mir?!"

Tolle coughed. "I d-don't want her to be in pain any lon-ger... I love her with all my heart but I also want her to keep living, a-and be happy," he replied.

"You IDIOT! What KIND of answer was that?!" I demanded.

Tolle looked at me with his dull eyes. "T-take care of yourself and Mir as well. M-mirillia..." he gave a small sigh and then closed his dull eyes for the last time. Mirillia...

"TOLLE!!!" I screamed as Athrun came running in alarm.

Everyone who had just come back, dropped everything they carried and stood in a strange manner. Mirillia's body shook. She had felt someone call her name from deep within. "T-t-tolle... TOLLE!" she screamed out his name while she felt her body growing heavier and collasped with tears streaming down her cheeks.

I stared at Mirillia who had screamed and then passed out in grief as she saw that Tolle was no longer breathing. Athrun held me by my shoulders. "Cagalli?" he asked in a small voice.

I was shaking, I knew it. I stood up and lowered Tolle's unmoving body.I shrugged off Athrun's hands and with my bangs covering my face, I felt anger and resentment. He was gone... just like that... "TOLLE, I HATE YOU!" I screamed as I took off into the jungle.

A/N: Wow... I felt so sad after writing this... Even Tolle wasn't my most favorited character, but I felt what Cagalli was feeling, having a very close friend die right in front of your eyes. But please don't hate me for killing Tolle off! Please give me your opinon of this chapter, thanks.