Disclaimer: I don't own DGrayMan or FMA
Authoress Note: As someone pointed out, yes I do know that Envy is genderless but making Envy a boy is so much easier than just referring to him as 'it' the whole time. Plus, in the first anime Envy was Ed and Al's half-brother. I'm trying to find a nice blend of everything here (FMA first anime, brotherhood/manga, and DGray-man) if I can.
Obvious Grief
By: animeroxsmyworld
Chapter 10: A Step
When Maes Hughes joined the research department he thought he would no longer have to face the battle scene. He thought he could leave his horrible nightmares of wounded men, women and children behind him with Ishbal, locked away in a special corner of his mind.
Apparently he was wrong.
A child let out a sudden shriek as a medic dug a needle through the child's skin, starting one of many stitches that would help heal a rather deep wound. The boy balled his fists and gave loud shrieks of pain between clenched teeth as the needle wove flawlessly through his skin as if humans were simply pieces of a quilt that could be stitched back together. Hughes inwardly cringed as he turned his gaze away, more cries and sniffled muttering reaching up to his ears like forgotten infants.
Upon arrival in Risembool temporary stations were made, large tents protecting them from the sun as survivors from the city began to clamber to them, as if a beacon had suddenly been lit. They came flocking, not just for medical attention, but for food and some came for an extra shirt or two. It seemed that in a time such as this, they were to be the town's saving grace.
The area in and around the tents were swarming with people.
The medics were constantly on the move, quickly assessing one patient before moving onto another, trying to priorities those who sustained the most damage…who needed the most help.
The air reeked of blood and sterile equipment.
Hughes could feel his head begin to pound as a man bellowed in agony as three doctors tried to continue operating on him, fellow townsfolk holding him still as they continued extracting chunks of metal from his leg. Somewhere in the background a baby began to wail out of hunger and the noises seemed to amass and pound like a drum in Hughes' head. Hughes left the tent with a rolling feeling in his stomach and a headache burning in his brain.
He had never wanted to be a medic.
He longed for his desk back at HQ.
He walked further away from the tent and pushed past the crowd of people who had been left beggars from the wreckage. When he finally pulled himself free he inhaled deeply, fresh air filling his nose and calming him. The smoke from the fire that had encased more than half the city had long since left the air, but the smell still remained the closer to town one went.
With his head clearing Hughes was able to actually take in his surroundings. Several other officers from the research department could be seen taking notes or scouring the distance as they prodded at rubble or ventured into the city to look through destroyed streets. At times like this, when knowledge of the battle was close to nothing, sending out researchers were quite common.
'But why on Earth did they have to send me?'
With five other researchers on the scene Hughes didn't see why he couldn't just head back to HQ and leave this place and the memories it stirred, behind him.
Marvin only had so much medication at his home. He actually had a small store inside the town but he doubted it was still intact. As it was, treating Edward had depleted his supply exponentially and even though Ed's wounds were wrapped and on the mend, he still needed daily medication to help deal with the pain.
It was like a blessing in disguise when the military arrived two days ago, stock full of medication, food, and other small things, or so the doctor had heard. Despite the near destruction of the town news still managed to get around. Ed's medication only had one more days worth left so they would have to try and reach the survivors tent unless they wanted him to be subjected to excruciating pain.
Al crouched down in front of Edward's gaze, the older Elric staring blankly at the material of his pants and absently running his hand over the baggy material. He had been nothing but depressed the past few days. Marvin would've started to consider his behaviour due to some sort of head injury if it wasn't for the short conversation Al was able to extract from him.
That and the awful bloodcurdling screams he heard at night. Nightmares like nothing he could imagine.
"Brother?" Al asked hopefully.
Ed blinked but made no motion to show he heard the armor, his hand still playing with the material of his pants. They were a couple sizes too big, Marvin's son's from back when he had still been living at home. They barely stayed on Ed's hips, a belt fastened to the very last hole to try and keep them on his body.
Al repressed a sigh and continued on knowing that Ed would speak up when Al said something of interest. "Doctor Marvin says we're running low on your medication. The military came to Risembool two days ago with medics so we just need to get you down to them in order to get you more medication."
"Why?"
Al was starting to get used to Ed's one word questions. But that didn't mean he didn't need them to be elaborated every now and then.
"Why what?"
"Why can't the doctor just go to the medics himself and get the medication? Why do I have to go there?" Ed continued, his eyes finally sliding over to Al's still dented helmet. They're eyes met and Ed immediately tensed and his eyes slid away to the ground.
The voice was the same.
The mannerisms were the same.
When he wasn't looking Ed forgot, for the barest fraction of a second.
And then he saw the armor. The crushed, dented helmet and the huge intimidating body that towered over him and clanked with each movement.
And his heart would shatter. It took everything he had not to break down weeping on his little brother each time Al managed to step into his vision. It wasn't his fault. It could never be his fault. But it was a reminder.
A reminder to how bad everything had been. How bad everything had gotten.
Everything had seemed to tumble away like sand, Ed not being able to control anything. All he could do was watch as the wind took away the pieces. All the villagers, his home, his mother…
And Al had almost…
"You have to go because the doctor thinks that it's not just the medication you need." Al replied calmly, his voice soothing and pulling Ed sharply from his thoughts. Ed's face pulled into the barest hint of a frown and Al decided to elaborate.
"Food for one. Maybe if the military gives it to you, you'll actually eat it."
Ed repressed the urge to scowl openly. He ate as much as was required. Though he did spend much of his lunch and supper time just pushing his food around. He just didn't have the appetite at the moment. His whole world was gone. How could he be expected to eat at a time like this? Al made to continue talking when Marvin entered the room and saw the two boys.
"Ah Edward, we'll be heading out today." He informed as he wiped his glasses on his shirt, riding it of any smudges. Ed's face fell blank as his shoulders drooped. The air filled with more questions but Ed remained closed off. He resigned himself to his fate as Al sighed at his brother before placing his hobbled form inside the doctor's one wheelchair. If Ed protested he showed no signs as they wheeled him out into the outside world, Al ducking under the doorway as he went.
The roads were uneven and rough as they made their way to the tents. It was easy to spot them even at a distance. People crowded around them and as they got closer Marvin frowned. Perhaps coming to the tents for some simple medication might be harder than he anticipated.
Road closed her eyes and let her mind go free as she sat peacefully beneath a tree, her lollipop shoved in her mouth and making her cheeks puff out. She felt her Noah side spill over her mind, taking control as she began to shift through the akumas that she could feel.
Who could she call? Who should she call?
Level ones were obviously the ones that had first been to this town. That much was obvious by its total destruction. Sure level two's could be just as bad but they usually had a purpose and tended to stay away from totally annihilation of a town. Unless of course they were on orders, but the Earl wasn't ready to put his plans into action yet so full scale attacks like that wouldn't have been his orders.
"Not one." She firmly muttered to herself as she closed her eyes and leaned against the tree trunk at her back, the top half of the tree completely gone, having been blown off in the mentioned attack. She hummed as she continued to shift through the nearby akumas.
Threes were still quite rare. And even if she called for one now it would take a while for it to get here, they mostly hung out near the Earl and truth be told, she wasn't close to him geographically at the moment.
"A two then." She nodded. A smile wisped across her lips before vanishing as her brow furrowed as she located the closest level twos. She let her mind wisp over the two sources and felt their presence flare in recognition, both attentive like dogs to her words.
"There's innocence in Risembool that I need you to get. Bring it to me."
She could faintly register their cries of enthusiasm at being picked by a mighty Noah as she slipped her presence away from theirs and slowly opened her eyes again. A small pout formed on her face as she realized that all she could do now was sit and wait. And waiting was boring. There was nothing entertaining in this town to distract her anymore.
With an audible sigh she shuffled into a comfier position and let herself digest her lollipop.
The train was a whirl of speed and colour as he saw it chug closer and closer. He pressed his lips together firmly as the resolve in his stomach hardened, the train steady in its speed. The wind picked up from the speed and he began to jog next to the tracks, lining himself beside the tracks.
He had to do this. He knew it deep inside his heart.
'I know why you did this to me…'
The train seemed to thunder with noise and suddenly it was there. His feet flew like the wind as he chased after it, the arm closest to the metal beast reaching out instinctively. Car after car went by when suddenly he found an opening and with a prayer he took it.
His legs left the ground with a mighty leap and his hands flew out to catch the rail before him. With a clang that was silenced by the thundering of the train, he caught a hold and pulled himself over into safety with a loud thud. His breath was erratic as adrenaline pumped through his veins but he offered thanks to the god above.
With a quick glance he saw that he had made it onto the train unnoticed and feeling a small amount of pride seep into him, he grabbed the door handle and carefully slid it open. Being this far back on the train it should just be storage, the perfect place to hide away for safe passage.
He blinked as four heads turned to him.
Oh.
Cards littered the floor, a game in progress as the men seated on the floor stared up at the sudden intruder. They were huddled among the boxes of cargo, having pushed them along the walls of the car to make room to sit down.
They were stowaways. Like him.
He made to step back out of the car when one of the men sitting on the floor suddenly waved frantically towards him. "Hurry and get in here! Shut the door! You trying to get us all found out or something?"
He blinked again.
Slowly he stepped inside and closed the door, darkness surrounding all of them except for the large square of light that filtered in through the pane of glass on the sliding door. He was told to take a seat and in the dark it took him several seconds to find enough space for him. The only thing that was illuminated was the game of cards, at least until his eyes adjusted.
As he found a spot silence reigned in the car before the men seemed to slowly continued their game, as if they had almost forgotten about it in his presence. Which could've easily been the case. Even he knew his presence was intimidating. But for the task set out before him maybe that was a blessing of its own. The game ensnared the other men's attention and the ex-priest was left to watch, picking up on the different poker plays that they all shifted through.
"You don't need those shades in here." One of the men called out suddenly causing him to start. "It's dark enough. You shouldn't be blinding yourself purposefully."
No one had bothered to introduce themselves and even if they did he wouldn't have remembered. But as those words left his mouth the ex-priest found himself burning the features of the man to memory, or what he could make of him. Curled dark hair and pale skin that almost sickly when his hands flashed in the light to pick at the cards. Thick glasses covered his eyes but he could feel the gaze searing into him behind their frames.
He shifted and gave a grunt in response. "I'm fine."
"He's probably missing an eye or something." One of the other men joked with a snicker as he tossed some chips onto the floor. The man next to him let out a bark of a laugh.
"With that humongous scar on his face? That's make for some sort of storybook pirate don't ya think? Except he'd need an eye patch instead of sunglasses."
The glare was to be predicted but even the man with the thick glasses let out a small snicker before he actually turned to face their intruder. "Whatever it is its safe here. What's a missing eye among stowaways?"
"Aye!" One of the earlier men chortled, clearly amused at the running pirate joke. Seeing no way out of this besides venturing out for another unlocked storage cart or simply blasting them he reached up and slid the shades off of his face.
Bright red eyes glared back at them.
Their looks of laughter and amusement slid into shocked silence as their grins wiped off their faces.
Marvin realized he shouldn't have been worried about getting to the tent. The crowds of people parted like puffs of dandelion seeds as they saw Alphonse wheel his brother forward. In all honesty Marvin himself had been in a state of shock when he had seen the younger Elric walking around in that dented suit of armor. But he had been way too preoccupied with other things at the time to let a walking and talking suit of armor get the better of him.
Apparently these people had no such qualms about staring and pointing at the suited child. The crying and yelling that had filled the area around the tent gave way to a silence that was soon erupting with a buzz of whispers.
Al's shoulders hunched and even Marvin had to remind himself that underneath all that armor was a small boy with insecurities and a gentle soul. Yet he continued to wheel his silent brother towards the tent, careful to avoid any bumps.
It was when they were within arm's reach of the opening of the tent, the startled gazes of the medics and militia inside finding them that the murmured words grew to be too much. With a ferocity that Marvin had never knew a child to possess, Ed whipped his head to the side. His eyes burned bright with furious fire and he looked like he could easily tear out the nearest person's throat.
"WHAT ARE YOU ALL LOOKING AT?! PISS OFF!"
His yell rung through the stock still crowd. Al was frozen in place, his helmet staring down at his seething brother before he seemed to bring himself around, the younger more shocked about his brother's foul language then the fact that Edward had actually snapped.
"Brother!" Al hissed quietly in a scolding voice. But that was all he said. He didn't tell him off for telling off those whispering lookers. He didn't tell him off for yelling. Just scolded him for his language and slowly wheeled him the rest of the way into the tent as Ed fumed darkly, his eyes glaring at any who bothered to meet his eye. Marvin slowly walked in after them, careful to keep stride with Al.
Apparently Ed's yell had affected all those inside the tent who had been staring and the first few medics nearby flocked to attend to them out of shame. But it was easy to see. Al could see it as he let them look his brother over and Dr. Marvin explained what medication he had Edward on. Eyes still flickered to him.
Questions. He could see them.
They burned in their eyes but went unasked.
He shifted nervously and tried to tune everyone else, instead trying to become completely ensnared with the conversation the medic before him was having with the doctor as they got a very irritable Edward onto one of the temporary beds.
The female medic turned her gaze towards the elder Elric and very delicately reached forward and unwrapped the bandages that covered his two stumps. Ed's sour face instantly disappeared to be replaced with one of pain as the bandages fell and showed his wounds to the world. Al forced himself to look. If his body had been normal he knew he probably would've gagged to the point of vomiting. Like a true medic the woman didn't even blink as she crouched down and examined the cuts and rushed amputations that Dr. Marvin had made with a critical eye.
"The nerves are still exposed." She stated after a second. Her eyes then flicked up to Ed who was grimacing in pain but forcing himself to watch her. "If you plan on getting automail you would need to do it soon for the ports to have full connection with your nerves. If not I can do what we can and stitch the skin over completely. But if I do that now, if you ever want automail in the future, they will have to literally re-amputate you to get at your nerves again." She explained slowly, the words rolling off of her tongue carefully, making sure that Ed could hear each word she said.
As Al sat and listened he could clearly picture how Ed would be without automail, without the mobility the metal limbs would offer him. Even from this point in life Al could tell Ed would be absolutely miserable. The decision seemed so clear that when Al saw the look of defeat on his brother's face it startled him.
"I…if you…" Ed mumbled, his words quiet against the noises inside the tent.
"Brother you need to get automail!" Al cut in sharply.
Ed's head snapped up quickly. "I do? What about money Al? Automail costs money!" He explained and Al was almost crushed by the weight of the sadness in those golden eyes. He had been mistaken. Ed wasn't defeated by the fact of not wanting automail…they couldn't afford automail.
And all their money had been blown to pieces with their house.
Silence beat down upon them both, neither knowing what to say. The medic however had more pressing matters and seemed to come to her own decision.
"Well you let me know when you decide. Until then you'll need to go back in your chair because other people will need this bed." She explained as she deftly bandaged his stumps back up and pressed the medication Marvin had been rambling to her about earlier into the good doctor's hand. With that the two brothers found themselves outside, near the back of the tent where there were less people due to how close it was to the nearby cliffs.
"We could always try Auntie Pinako." Al said after several minutes of silence. "She would be willing to fit you for automail."
Ed's face remained defeated as he watched men dressed in the blue of the military begin to walk towards the tent, several makeshift gurney pitched between them. Bodies piled high on the gurneys, the non-survivors of the attacks, retrieved from the town.
"I don't think so Al." He replied.
"What? Why not?"
In the briefest of gestures Ed tilted his head towards the men making their way towards the tent. Al followed his gaze. It took three seconds for him to spot the withered old woman among the other bodies, her tiny glasses broken and bits of glass embedded in her face, grey hair falling out of her squished bun like wisps of smoke. Despite the blood that drenched her front from where a shot had impaled her, she looked perfectly at ease.
Her…the one they had called Auntie.
Their world was truly gone.