Disclaimer: I do not own PJO, though I could have. You guys probably won't believe me if I tell you I came up with a similar idea way before Riordan did. You think I'm crazy, don't you?

amicaricia10: I'm so happy you like my story. You've motivated me to keep on writing (I get really lazy at times). To answer your question, yes I will pair Gwen and Dakota. Eventually. I don't know if you noticed, but I've been trying to subtly hint to their pairing in the previous chapters. They are very young, but then again so is Hazel. That didn't stop Riordan from putting her in a love triangle with two sixteen year olds.

Thanks to everybody else who reviewed. To all you PJO enthusiasts, there will be some Dakota/Gwen, more high flying, monster slashing action from Jason, and so much more! So keep reading, enjoying and reviewing.

X

The chicken man

In the end, Gwen was able to figure out how to change the chariot back into the Mist car, and they slept comfortably in its seats. When morning came they left behind their spot in the woods and hit the road once more. It was already the 27th, just two more days until the lightning thief would pass by St. Louis. They had to make good time, which was hard to do since monsters and crazy maiden goddesses always stood in their way.

"That Lady Diana was quite something, huh," said Gwen pensively.

"Yeah, and unfortunately for us this one won't die in a car crash," said Jason.

The monsters were a real problem. Twice they had been attacked since they left the forest, first by a horned centaur, then by Stymphalian birds. Jason knew the monsters were attracted mainly by his Big Three demigod scent. It was stronger than regular half-blood scent, which meant it was almost impossible for heroes like Jason to survive in the mortal world.

Jason leaned back in his seat with a heavy sigh. He had lost Ivlivs after hurling it at one of the vicious metal birds. His trusty weapon still hadn't returned to his pocket. His jacket was torn further by the birds and he had various scratches on his arms. He didn't risk using ambrosia to heal the scratches, he had taken too much god food after after their encounter with the Calydonian boar. He didn't want his essence burned away.

He forced himself to relax. He sat on the back seat next to Gwen. Dakota sat at the driver's seat pretending to drive the chariot car. Jason glanced briefly at the girl next to him. She stared through the windshield at the road ahead. There was obviously still something bothering her. She had finally opened up to him, but Jason felt there was still something she wasn't telling him. She had met her mom, Fortuna, but had made it sound like she had seen Death itself. The Roman gods were harsher by nature, but they were generally nice to their kids. Their didn't attend their kids' softball games, that was for sure, but they were not cruel to them. And why did Gwen react when he mentioned the Crooked One? Was it possible she knew who he was? Jason would have to get answers from her, but he would not push too hard.

It was at around nine in the morning when they decided to stop for breakfast. They had traveled as far as Colorado City. The city was an array of modern buildings which contrasted with the snow-capped mountains behind it. Their ride stopped a short distance from a McDonald's.

"Gods, I'm starving," said Dakota. "And I need a shower, too." Jason had to agree. The last time he showered was at back at camp. All the monster fighting, the rolling around and being thrown onto trees had made him quite filthy. He needed a change of clothes as well. Alas, demigod life was not that comfortable. Jason shed his tattered jacket as they exited the car, and was left wearing a maroon pullover. It was colder without the jacket, but they wouldn't be staying outdoors for long. They went inside the fast-food restaurant and ordered a large breakfast with Gwen's mortal money.

After all those meals they had in the wilderness, the breakfast was heaven. Or Elysium, Jason supposed. They ate in silence, consumed by finishing this wondrous meal. They didn't hang around and chat, they still had a long and troublesome voyage ahead of them.

Before they even made back to the chariot, they were ambushed.

A sales guy popped up from seemingly nowhere. He was tall with blond hair that had an innocuous amount of gel. He had a grin that was supposed to be charming but ended up being annoying, revealing blindingly white teeth. Like that one toothpaste commercial where the guy's teeth glowed in the dark. He wore a beige trench coat that went down below his knees.

"You kids look like you're in need of something," he said.

"Hello to you too, random sir," said Dakota.

The man chuckled slightly as the trio gave each other confused looks.

"Where are my manners. Allow me to introduce myself." He extended a hand to Jason. "Claudio, at your service. I cater to all your demigod travel needs."

Alarm bells went off immediately in Jason's head. He could see his friends sharing worried glances and hands going to their weapons. This dodgy-looking guy knew what they were. That only meant he was part of their world.

"I saw your weapons," he assured them. "I make it my business to recognize my clientele."

"What do you want from us?" asked Gwen.

"The question you should be asking is, what is it you want from me?"

He opened up his trench coat to reveal a gleaming array of trinkets hanging on the inside. There were Imperial gold gladii, spearheads and arrow tips. There were wristwatches of all sorts with Roman numerals. There was also what suspiciously looked like grenades, and vials filled with a strange swirling green liquid. Other stuff Jason didn't recognize.

"Whoa, where did you get all that," asked Jason.

"I've been around," said Claudio. "So, what are you heroes looking for? I've got genuine magical weapons, none of that standard crap they issue at Camp Jupiter."

Claudio flashed his blinding smile and pulled a gladius from his collection. He gripped it with both hands, and the blade started smoking. It turned red like it had been thrust into a really hot furnace, then caught fire. Orange flames surged along the length of the blade. Next to Jason, Dakota took a step back. Jason looked up and down the street, concerned with what the mortals were seeing. There were few of them around, and the ones who passed by gave them odd looks. Who knew what they saw through the Mist? The sales guy waved the flaming weapon about, as if testing a baseball bat.

"Get a load of this bad boy. It can cut through solid steel, and dragon hide. Get it now for the low price of ten denarii."

Jason had to admit that the sword was pretty cool. It couldn't replace Ivlivs, he had become attached to his trusty sword/lance, but he could use a spare. The sword stopped burning and Claudio placed it back in his coat.

"Now check this out." He pulled out a faded Swiss army knife. "This is one of my proudest possessions."

"It's just a pocket knife," said Dakota warily.

"Correction, young hero. It's a demigod pocket knife. Your own personal armory."

He pulled out the small pocket blade from the Swiss army knife. Immediately, the silver blade grew and changed color until an Imperial gold gladius was in the man's hands. Dakota's face broke into a grin.

"That's awesome!"

"That's not all, my curly-haired friend."

Claudio folded the sword like he would a pocket knife, and the sword morphed back to its Swiss army knife form. He pulled out the Phillips head screwdriver, and the knife changed into an Imperial gold double-edged battle axe.

"This baby can change into any non-projectile weapon you can think of."

"Even a bat'leth?" asked Gwen.

"Even a bat'leth."

"What's a bat'leth?" asked Jason.

"Well, he's obviously not a fan of Star Trek. Is that your ride over there?" He pointed at their chariot. "It's pretty sweet. So, for only twelve denarii, the pocket knife could be yours."

"I call dibs!" Dakota shouted.

"I don't know, guys," said Jason, turning to his friends. "I don't think we should be wasting our money on this stuff. We might need it later on."

"You're just saying that because you already have a cool magical weapon. Besides, I'll buy it with my money."

"No. As quest leader I say leave it."

Dakota looked at Jason in disbelief for a few moments, then steeled his face in anger."

"Fine," he said simply.

Jason knew he had hit a nerve. But this was the right decision, he reasoned. It was pointless wasting denarii on weapons when they already had some, and wasting time trying to train themselves to use these new weapons. Dakota may not understand now, but he would soon enough. This was the right call...right? Looking into his dark angry eyes at that moment made Jason doubt his decision. Maybe he shouldn't have pulled rank on him like that.

He turned to Claudio, who was still flashing his lighthouse of a smile.

"Unless you have something of real use to us, we won't be buying anything."

The sales man must have realized that he was losing his customers because his brilliant smile faltered slightly.

"Wait!" he shouted, almost in a panic. "I have something else. A whistle. You blow it, and it puts monsters to sleep. The goddess Diana herself used it during her hunts. You'll get it real cheap too, just six denarii."

"That one sounds real handy," said Gwen. "It would make killing monsters so much easier."

"Yeah," Jason agreed, "then again do we really want something that belonged to Diana? She might return and decide she wants it back."

Dakota only grumbled. It appeared he was still angry from earlier.

"Fine," Jason conceded. "We'll take it."

Claudio's grin returned once more.

"Great! It's not with me right now, but give me five minutes and let me go get it. Just wait right here."

Jason gave him three denarii (he would get the other three when he returned with the whistle). The sales man took off down the street in a mad rush, and soon disappeared mysteriously. They waited for him patiently. The waiting soon became awkward since Dakota was still angry at Jason. Jason tried to ease the tension, but it was clear he wouldn't be forgiven easily.

Soon five minutes past, then another five, and still Claudio did not show up.

"What's taking him so long?" Gwen said.

"If only we took the pocket knife, none of this would be happening," said Dakota. "But no. 'Let's not buy the Swiss army knife, Dakota. Let's wait forever for a stupid whistle instead of getting the thing that was already here, Dakota'."

"I get it, you really wanted the knife," said Jason a little angrily.

"It's not about the knife. You made me seem-"

"Guys, please stop fighting, said Gwen exasperatedly. "Its not helping."

So they continued waiting for Claudio. Fifteen minutes later, it was apparent that he wasn't coming back. He had conned them. Jason's heart dropped to his shoes. He had made a bad decision. His first bad decision as leader. The feeling was horrible, he felt like giving up his position as quest leader entirely. Could this day get any worse?

"Guys, where's our car?" asked Dakota slowly.

Jason turned a little too quickly on his heels. The chariot, which they had parked a few yards away when they went to grab breakfast, was gone.

"What...who-" Gwen stammered.

"It was Claudio," Dakota exclaimed. "Who else could it be, there are just mortals around us. See what you got us into, Jason?"

Jason moved his hand over his blond hair, ignoring Dakota's last statement. He had to find a solution, and quickly. He could not afford to linger on how much he messed up.

"He's a thief. That's how he got all that stuff. He steals them then sells them to the next unsuspecting person."

"So how do we find him?" asked Gwen.

"I don't know, why don't we ask quest leader over here," Dakota said sarcastically.

"Dakota please." She looked at him imploringly, and the curly haired boy softened slightly.

To Jason, they seemed to be communicating without any words.

"I say we look around the city," Jason said, unsure whether he should be giving orders so soon after his failure. "He's probably still around, trying to sell the chariot. That's our best bet. And Dakota?" The son of Bacchus turned and faced him, his face stoic. "I made a mistake, okay? And I'm trying to make up for it. So help me out."

"This doesn't mean I forgive you," said Dakota, but he no longer looked angry.

So they searched, and looked, and searched again. They went to all the parks, the dark alleys, everywhere a con salesman would go, but they didn't find him. They asked around, but nobody seemed to know a Claudio. Jason was getting really tired, and furious at the sales guy. When he saw him again he was going to strangle him.

Their luck (well, Gwen's luck) changed at around noon when a passersby told them he had seen a dodgy trench coated man on 32nd street. They followed that lead and found Claudio trying to sell a knock off Rolex to a mortal. Jason flipped Ivlivs into sword form while his friends drew their weapons. When he saw them, Claudio grinned widely, though the grin looked a bit forced.

"Ah, my half-blood friends, I was just about to come-"

"Save it, we're not interested in your excuses," said Jason.

"Where's our chariot?" Gwen demanded.

"Let's talk about this."

"Enough talk, Claudio." Dakota trained his spear on the man's neck.

The trio circled Claudio, whose smile faltered then died. The mortal got all confused and ran.

"First of all, it's Claudius, not Claudio. Secondly, I really hate half-bloods. They remind me of what I once was. Let me tell you my story, because I doubt you've ever heard it. Before I kill you."

"Look, Claudio, Claudius- whatever your name is-" began Jason. "I'm sure we'd love hearing your story, but we've got to be somewhere and-"

"I won't take too much of your time. You see, once upon a time I was a demigod like you, a son of Mercury, in the time before Julius Caesar. I wasn't in a legion, fighting for Empire wasn't really my thing. One day I was out in the fields, just minding my own business, when I came across the most beautiful creature I had ever seen. A goddess in the flesh. I was captivated by her-"

"Hang on, I remember now," said Jason. He was beginning to recall the myth. "You weren't captivated by her. The goddess was Victoria, and you were more interested in her wings."

"Excuse me, but I'm pretty sure I know what happened in my own story."

"You monster guys like adding on to your stories," said Gwen. "He is a monster, right, Jason?"

Jason nodded, then turned to Claudius. "You were a petty thief, but you wanted to be remembered for something greater. So you found Victoria and boasted that you were the fastest runner in all of Rome. She challenged you to a footrace to prove who was the best, but you said it was unfair that she had wings."

"It was unfair," Claudius pouted. "She could do all that teleporting thing that gods do with those wings. Those beautiful, silky wings."

The man had a faraway look in his eyes. "Right, so she said she could beat you even without the wings, and she took them off and placed them on a rock."

"Wait, isn't that considered plucking them off?" asked Dakota.

"No. She's a goddess, she can do that kind of stuff. Anyway, you guys started racing, but you allowed her to get ahead of you so you could double back and steal her wings."

Gone was the bright smile on Claudius' face. It had been replaced by a wild, crazed look.

"And I used them to beam me out of there," he finished. "For eight months I eluded her, the greatest eight months of my life. Do you have any idea the things you can do when you can travel like a god? The places you can go? I was untouchable."

"Until Victoria caught you. She took her wings back...and that's where the myth gets confusing."

"I'll show you confusing." Claudius was now seething. He threw off his trench coat, revealing a pair of wings on his back. A pair of chicken wings.

Gwen gasped. "The chicken man."

Now, they were not the type of chicken wings found in a restaurant. They were white, but mottled and patchy. Fluffy feathers floated gently to the ground as Claudius tried (unsuccessfully) to spread the wings like an angel. In the end he ended up looking like, well, a chicken.

"So you're the chicken man," said Jason. "You don't look like someone I should beware."

"He reminds me of Icarus," said Gwen.

"Yeah, if Icarus had AIDS," said Dakota, chuckling.

Jason couldn't help but laugh at that. "He looks like Freddie Prinze Jr. and the San Diego chicken's love child."

"You guys are really mean, you know that," the chicken man shouted feebly.

"One version," said Jason, after recovering from that laughing fit, "says Victoria punished you by giving you chicken wings so you can forever carry the shame of your actions. Another version says you missed Victoria's wings so you got the chicken wings yourself."

"Who cares what the legends say. All I know is that my wish came true. I wanted to be remembered for generations, and I am. I have gone down into history books as the only man to steal the Wings of Victory!"

"I wouldn't say history books, per se. More like, a story told to young demigods to lighten the mood when the other monsters get too scary."

The chicken man gritted his teeth in anger. "I'll show you who's scary." He leaped suddenly and grabbed Gwen. Before Jason could fully comprehend what was happening, Claudius spread his wings and took off into the sky.

A/N: This chapter was getting too long, I just had to chop it in half. Originally, the battle against the chicken man was on this chapter. Also, I hope you guys understood the quarrel between Jason and Dakota. Its not about the pocket knife (because that would just be lame), its about how Jason pulled rank on him. He needs to get used to a younger kid calling the shots, and that Jason may possibly already be more powerful than him. I wanted to show a new dynamic in their friendship, not just the "everything's all hunky-dory" side. How did I do?

Next chapter, more chicken man action and, "the son of Neptune is abroad. Fight him alone and you will lose." Stay tuned!