Anyway The Wind Blows

Like he did every morning Deeks trudged to the kitchen, still clad in his pajamas with his blonde curls sticking up in all directions. He turned on the coffee maker and rubbed his sleep filled eyes, wondering how in earth Kensi felt it was a good idea to wake up on their day off so early in the morning. He had rolled his eyes and told her she was crazy and even from beneath the safety of the blankets he had felt her hard stare burning into him, eventually encouraging him to almost literally roll out of bed.

He didn't even bother arguing over who got to shower first; he was too tired and cranky. All he wanted was coffee. While the pot began to fill and he shoved two pieces of toast in the toaster he wandered outside to get the paper, reading over the front page as he made the trek back upstairs.

Deciding to skip the shower for now he went to the bedroom to find his jeans, quirking an eyebrow when he walked in and found Kensi wrestling with the pants she had managed to shimmy up her hips. She muttered under her breath as she fumbled with the button before finally giving up and collapsing on the bed, seemingly exhausted. Deeks face broke out into a wide grin as he walked to the bed, sitting down beside Kensi.

"Babe, I think you need some bigger jeans."

…

That morning Kensi was not in a good mood. After losing the fight with her clothes she settled on a bigger pair she had found shoved in the bottom of her drawer. They were a tad baggy and rested low on her hips but at least she could button them.

After some arguing with Deeks that had ended with a tearful I hate you (she really hated hormones) before ending in a hug and a steamy kiss (again, did she mention she hated hormones?) he had managed to talk her into calling Nell to take her shopping for more clothes that didn't require world war three to button.

Of course the younger woman had happily accepted, saying she had been meaning to get to the mall anyways. So after a quick drive to her apartment the two ended up at the local mall, staring at the huge selection of maternity clothes in front of them.

"So uh, where do you wanna start?" Nell asked, glancing sideways at Kensi and seeing the uneasy look in her eyes. Kensi shrugged and pointed to a rack of jeans next to them. She picked up a pair, nose scrunching up when she saw the elastic band around the waist and Nell giggled.

"Here," she said, holding out a pair, "these look pretty normal. Why don't you try them on." Kensi disappeared behind the curtain the dressing area, emerging a few moments later with a smile on her face as she showed them to Nell.

"Those look great," she smiled. After some more looking and an armful of new clothes the two ended up on a bench near one of the large fountains. Nell looked at Kensi before her eyes wandered to her stomach and her lips twitched into a small smile.

"Are you scared?" she asked, making Kensi look up in surprise. She chewed her bottom lip for a moment before nodding slightly.

"Yeah, I guess. But not of having a baby… I guess I'm more afraid of being a mom. I mean, this little person is going to be looking at me and wondering what to do, why things happen... Stuff I'm afraid I won't have the answer to." she shrugged and Nell put a comforting hand on hers, squeezing lightly.

"I think even if you don't have the answer, you'll always have something to say. It's who you are and it's what's going to make you a great mother."

…

By the time Kensi got home it was dark out, the air had taken on a slight chill and the city lights were visible even from afar. She had dropped Nell back at her apartment and headed home, her body exhausted. It was different being pregnant and she found that even the things she normally did wore her out faster than they had ever done before.

She gathered her bags from the backseat and headed upstairs, pushing the door open and dropping her things on the floor. She had to get her shoes off. Collapsing on the couch she kicked off her sandals and looked up as Deeks walked in, smiling at her and planting a kiss on her lips.

"Have a good time?" he asked. She smiled and nodded, letting out a yawn that earned her a grin. He grabbed her hand and pulled her to her feet, ignoring her tired protests.

"What are you doing?" she complained. She followed Deeks into the bedroom and then the bathroom where he stopped in front of the mirror. He held her hand and pointed at the reflection, carefully tugging the hem of her shirt up.

Her eyebrows knit together in confusion until she saw what he was trying to show her and she let out a small gasp. Her hand traveled to her stomach, a tiny bump sticking out from between her hips. She hadn't noticed before, too busy trying to hide the fact she was growing as her child was. It scared her to think of another human being growing inside of her and she ignored herself when in front of the mirror.

Now though, it was hard to get the image out of her head. She smiled and cocked her head to the side, admiring her bump as Deeks stood behind her beaming.

"I just wanted you to see how beautiful you are," he whispered, "even if you have to get size one hundred jeans, you'll still be beautiful." Kensi laughed and kissed his cheek, resting her head on his shoulder as she laid his hand on her stomach.

Whether she knew the answer or not she was certain of one thing. As long as they were together she and Deeks would be the best parents they could be.