Aaaand here's the part that begins the "T" bits, if you're sensitive to that kind of thing. I'll never post anything here that needs an "M." Ever. Review replies:
Guest who said "I love this story"- Thank you! :) That really does mean a lot!
Mike3207- Yes, I think she should know about Freya. I'd want to. Morgause stays in the dark for a little while longer. And Arthur getting hurt, hmm. I hadn't thought about that either.
Lady Cougar-Trombone- Yeah, maybe acting evil would be hard for someone trying to be good. I dunno. Merlin's used to angst I think. But I don't think either of them will feel bad for too long.
20000 WPM- Hee hee hee I'd love to have someone stick a sword in Uther and be done with him. He does get to suffer though, just wait.
yesthenLucky9- Hmm Morgause. She's a problem I didn't really consider. I don't like her so I avoid her, hmm.
In the morning, Merlin was just finishing mucking out the stables again when Morgana contacted him. She wanted to meet face-to-face, but he definitely needed a bath first. "Give me an hour, Morgana, and then come to Gaius's chambers. He won't be there so we can talk for a while."
"All right, see you then."
Merlin enjoyed his bath—he could reheat the water whenever it got cold. So it was no surprise that he'd lost track of time. He didn't hear Morgana enter the outer chambers, so he was blissfully unaware of her presence until she opened the door to his room. She shrieked then covered her mouth when she saw him. He was very glad for the bubbles that covered much of the water, and reached out to gather more toward him. Still she didn't move, but looked at him with interest until he said, "Morgana!"
"Oh," she replied, still not moving.
"Morgana, do you mind?" He motioned toward the door with his head.
"Oh," she repeated, and moved out the door, giggling the whole way.
Merlin rolled his eyes and reached for the towel. I'm never going to live this down. He dried and dressed slowly, for once not in a hurry to be alone with her. As he walked out into the main chamber, he kept his eyes on the floor. He would talk to her but he did not have to look at her face.
"Nice to see you Merlin! Though I didn't think I'd get to see so much of you," Morgana said.
He flushed red. "Ha ha. So what is it you wanted to talk about?"
She noticed his blush and how he avoided her eyes. "Hey, I'm sorry. I didn't really mean to stand there gawking at you like that. I was more than a little surprised. Or shocked. And I didn't see anything, um, below your chest, if that helps."
"Not really," he mumbled, still not looking at her.
"Merlin." She reached out and lifted his chin and he finally looked at her. "I really am sorry. I liked what I saw."
He gave her a faint smile. "Okay." With more confidence he said, "Let's sit down and talk."
"All right," Morgana said. "Morgause is definitely planning to invade Camelot again, probably with Cenred's help. She wants to get rid of Arthur and Uther and put me on the throne."
"Put you on the throne? Oh that's right, you're . . ." he suddenly ceased speaking.
"Wait. What were you going to say there?"
"Um . . . you're the natural choice if she or Cenred don't want the throne?"
"Why did that sound like a question?" She turned to glare at him. "That's not what you were going to say, was it?"
"No." He blew out a sigh. "I was in my room when Uther confessed to Gaius that he's your father. While you were ill." She narrowed her eyes angrily. "In my defense, he didn't know I was there and I couldn't sleep."
It was Morgana's turn to sigh. "I'm not angry with you. I'm angry with Uther! That poor excuse of humanity has lied to me for years, denied my heritage, killed too many of my kin to count, and would kill me and you if he found out our true natures." She tried to stand, but Merlin caught her hand to hold her down.
"Morgana, I don't like him any more than you do. It makes me sick to be in his presence, but I don't hate him. I pity him. He blamed all of magic for his misguided choice, and eventually he will be punished for what he's done. I just have to have faith and hope for the future—the one Arthur will create with our help. Patience."
"Patience is not my strong suit." She laughed ironically.
"I know," he replied, and started tracing circles on the back of her hand with his thumb. "Is there anything else to the plan?"
"I told her I'd 'take care of' Arthur in the upcoming tournament." Merlin's eyes grew wide at this. "Don't worry—I won't really." He relaxed. "She probably expects me to fail anyway. I'm also supposed to be pretending I'm loyal to the Pendragons while simultaneously undermining them."
"Wow. Fun."
"No, not really. Oh, and she's going to send word before they invade, so I can be ready."
"At least we have that."
"Yeah." She took a deep breath. "Look, I'm sorry about all the anger. I just . . . am having a hard time getting over this hate. I've hated Uther since before I met Morgause, so that's not related to her spell."
"It's understandable." He changed position to straddle the bench. Then he reached out with his free arm and put it around her back, pulling her to him. She rested her head on his shoulder. "This is what friends- or whatever we are –are for." He rubbed her back comfortingly.
She brought her free hand up to his shoulder. "Thank you Merlin. You're one of the reasons I'm still here." She moved that hand to the back of his neck and breathed him in. Mmmm. Then she started nuzzling his neck, pressing little light kisses to what skin she could find.
He sat still and unthinking for the moment. "Mmmm," he groaned, and used the hand on her back to pull her closer. She responded by untying his neckerchief, reaching to kiss the newly exposed skin. He let go of her hand so both of his could drift to her lower back, to hold her in place.
Her free hand slid up his side, under his arm and to his back. She sighed in satisfaction while her mouth drifted down his collarbone. Her other hand move to the side of his neck as she kissed there and along his jaw. She was so lost in the haze of emotion that she barely heard what he whispered in her head.
"Morgana," he thought to her. "Morgana, please stop." Her mouth paused right next to his. "You're pushing me again."
She kissed back over to his ear. "But I know you're enjoying this as much as I am." He was still holding on to her lower back.
"I am," he confirmed. "And right now I . . . but I'm going a little crazy and this is risky. Anyone could walk in here and catch us."
She ceased kissing him and brought her head around to lay her forehead on his. "That's true, but at least I got you to admit it." She smirked and slid down the bench a bit.
He took her hands with his. "You must know I feel the same way about you. But 'we' just can't be right now." She frowned and looked down. "Hey," he said, squeezing her hands until she looked back up at him, "that doesn't mean that 'we' will never be. I'm willing to wait as long as it takes; you're worth it." And he smiled his brilliant smile at her.
She looked into his eyes and saw nothing but the truth of what he'd said there. "You're worth it too." She smiled shyly at him before throwing her arms around him for a few moments.
"Now, are you ready to be serious again?" he teased as she sat back.
"If I have to be," she replied, and gave him a wink.
"All right. This invasion is a pretty serious threat. We should tell Arthur about it."
"Whoa there. How much will we tell him?"
He thought for a minute. "He'll want to know where we obtained the information. I think we should tell him about you spying on Morgause."
"But—"
"Not everything. He already knows she kidnapped you. We could say she's been keeping in contact with you, trying to win you over to her side." At her disgruntled face, he said, "What? It's not a total lie."
"What about the part where I was on her side?"
"Well, we can tell the truth about that, about how you had a change of heart. Or we can do it the other way. Conveniently leaving out all mention of magic, of course."
"All right. We'll go with the change of heart. It's much closer to the truth."
"Okay. I'd say we do it now, but he's distracted by tournament preparations. People will start arriving tomorrow."
"That's settled." She looked up at the window. "Looks like lunchtime—you'd better get going before Arthur bellows for you."
In the distance, they heard "MERLIN!"
They both laughed as they stood. She put her hand to his face. "See you later. I hope he's not too hard on you."
"No worries. I can handle what he gives out." With another laugh, they both walked out of the room.
xxxXxxx
The next day dawned. In the process of helping Arthur with the tournament, he'd learned not only that it was open to all comers, but that they could use any weapons they'd like. In fact, Arthur's exact words were, "'The only rule is: there are no rules.'" That made Merlin nervous, despite the fact that Arthur was probably the best swordsman in the five kingdoms. He'd seen some pretty nasty weapons out on the training field.
At present, he was in the armory, fixing Arthur's armor. Two men wandered in, one demanding that Merlin clean his boots. When he didn't move fast enough, one struck him with his whip. Suddenly a younger man stepped into the room. He looked younger than Merlin himself, and unlike any warrior he'd ever seen. The newcomer intervened, asking the man to put down his whip. When he didn't, the new guy grabbed a sword and forced the whip from the ruffian's hand, and a dagger he hadn't seen. Merlin thanked him and learned his name was Gilli.
The next morning, the tournament began. Arthur defeated his opponent handily, and advanced. To his surprise, Gilli also competed. He took a cut to the shoulder, but what was worse was his use of magic. Merlin was fairly sure no one besides him had seen it. It looked like he'd have to warn the kid.
He and Gaius approached him after his match, offering treatment for his wound. He turned it down, but not before they noticed his ring—his magic-imbued ring. Gaius later confirmed his suspicions about Gilli and the ring.
A little later in the day, the King called for Gaius. Some guards saw a man in an alcove and a bright flash of light. The heat left a scorch mark on the adjoining door. Gaius managed to downplay all the evidence, giving other plausible reasons for it. Fortunately the King didn't see the ring Gilli had dropped in his haste to leave. He'd used a crude sort of healing spell. Merlin had to step in and save this sorcerer/warrior from himself.
So Merlin paid Gilli a visit at the inn, under the pretense of checking on his wound. Then he not-so-subtly brought up how he'd seen Gilli use magic, and gave back the ring. Gilli explained he'd gotten the ring from his father, who'd been afraid to use his magic. He felt his father had been a coward and didn't want to be like him; he thought he should get to use his skill with magic in the competition. Gilli wanted to prove that he was someone because of his magic and not have to hide. Merlin could empathize with this, but Gilli would probably die if he didn't drop out. They couldn't continue the conversation after that point because Gilli's roommates returned.
xxxXxxx
The next day, Arthur won his bout handily and moved onto tomorrow's semifinal. Merlin watched Gilli enter the ring with one of the thugs he'd stood up to in the armory the other day. The big man forced Gilli up against the stands where the other thug grabbed him and held him there. But Gilli was wearing the ring again, and used his magic to throw the big guy away from him. Gilli strode over to the stunned man and struck him fatally.
After the bout, Merlin followed Gilli to the armory. He advised the younger man to withdraw from the competition, and Gilli agreed. He'd decided that he didn't like killing. Well that was a relief.
Merlin walked back to Gaius's chambers to get some dinner before he crashed. He told Gaius about what had happened with Gilli, but didn't speak much after. He'd gotten up to go to his room when Morgana contacted him.
"How goes it? Long time, no talk," she thought at him.
"Ohhhh it's been a really long couple of days. Sorry for the silence," he replied.
"I understand—Arthur's probably keeping you busier than normal."
"And having me run around to help others too. And then there's this other problem . . ."
"What other problem?"
"A sorcerer in the tournament. Using magic to win his battles, no less."
"That's dangerous—for him."
"Definitely. I think I've managed to talk him into withdrawing."
"Good. Who is it?"
"The really non-warrior-looking guy? Small, with borrowed weapons."
"Oh him. He killed his opponent today?"
"That's him. I hope he does withdraw. I really don't want him to get hurt or worse—lose his head."
"Yeah. Well, you 'sound' tired, so I'll let you rest."
"Thank you. Goodnight."
"Goodnight Merlin."
xxxXxxx
Arthur once again won his bout, but this one sent him into the final. Now he just had to wait until his opponent was decided. That would be when Gilli's opponent won by default. But as he stood there, watching with Gaius, he saw Gilli walk into the arena and thoroughly beat up his opponent. Now he was in the final. With Arthur.
This development led to a disheartening conversation with Gaius. The physician wanted to warn Arthur what he was going up against, that Gilli's use of magic for his own gain was corrupting him. But Merlin wanted to talk to him again. Gilli'd had no one to advise him how to used magic, so he deserved another chance. This time Merlin hoped Gilli would really listen to him.
Once again Merlin found himself heading to the inn. He found Gilli telling his story about the bout he'd just one. One look told the younger man what Merlin wanted. They walked together to his room.
Merlin told him how his opponent was doing. He'd been near fatally wounded. Gilli seemed to brush that off—it was all right as long as he wasn't injured. He had the respect he'd craved and assumed Merlin had never felt that way. Well he's wrong about that.
Merlin got up and closed the door to the room. He clenched his hand into a fist and whispered, "Forbærnan." Then he walked over to Gilli and opened his fist to reveal a small flame. Gilli looked on in shock while Merlin said, "It's . . . lonely. To . . . have more power than any man you know and have to live as a shadow. To . . . be special and, and have to act like a fool. I know how it feels, I understand."
Gilli replied, "Then you know why I must fight. If the Prince is killed, so what? How many of our kin have perished at his or Uther's hands? How many more will? It's time for those with magic to fight back!"
Merlin tried to talk Gilli down by speaking quieter to him, but he finally lost it, yelling at him, "You have to learn to use your magic for good! That is its real purpose! It isn't meant for your own pride!"
Gilli then told him how he wasn't going to apologize for who he was or pretend to be something he wasn't. He thought Merlin was a fool for defending and protecting the Prince, and accused him of forgetting who he was. When Merlin denied that, Gilli told him he was too weak and that he'd "strike a blow" for all those with magic. He left the room before Merlin could reply.
Well that didn't work, Merlin thought as he trudged away from the tavern. He couldn't sleep for thinking about the problem, so when he was sure Gaius was asleep, he left to summon Kilgharrah. They hadn't spoken since he'd told Merlin off for wanting to save Morgana. This will be interesting.
The talk with Kilgharrah wasn't very helpful, but at least he'd forgiven him for forcing Morgana's healing spell out of him. Maybe Morgana could help—in the morning.
Lovely action coming up; I hope I do OK with it! :) Thanks for reading!