Uncanny West Coast Avengers

Chapter 10: Kings and Archers

By

The Uncanny R-Man

Disclaimer- All familiar characters belong to Marvel. Mayhem belongs to Agent-G.

Shout Outs-

Nessie6- I'm glad you liked this. Pietro may not be my favourite Avenger but it is awfully fun to pick on.

Inferno Elf- Luna was kidnapped by Fenris and Maximus the Mad and exposed to the Terrigen Mists. That is how she got her powers.

Needles- Yes, I think Namorita is the clone of Namora.

Aaron- Heh-heh. It's always fun to tease the guys with mentions of 'women's things.' You can bet that Namor won't be all that pleased once he finds out about Clint and 'Nita. Heh.

Unknown legacy- There will be more from Ant-Man soon.

Agent-G- In Namorita's latest comic appearance (the latest New Warriors mini-series) she still has her blue skin. Yup, 'Nita will be sure to stick up for her new guy. Firestar and Tigra having a girls' night out? Sounds like an idea…

Thanks to- Sean Malloy-1.

Malibu-

Clint Barton, aka the archer known as Hawkeye, glared up at Namor. The King of Atlantis had popped in uninvited to a day out that Clint was having with Namorita, Namor's cousin.

'Now that I don't like you or anything, Subby…' Clint began. 'Okay, I don't like you. But what the Hell are you doing here? Invading the Surface World again?'

'You fully well know what I am doing, Barton.' Namor growled as he looked down at Clint with a steely gaze. 'You are making unwanted advances towards my cousin, and I am here to make sure that it does not continue.'

Clint looked right back at Namor and poked him in the chest.

'Now, you look here…' Clint growled. 'What right do you have to dictate who 'Nita does or doesn't go out with?'

'I am the King of Atlantis!' Namor snapped angrily. 'My word is law. Whether my people live in Atlantis or on the Surface World.'

'Excuse me?' Namorita hissed. 'Can I have a word in edgeways?'

'Stay out of this, Namorita.' Namor replied, not even turning to look at his cousin.

Namorita just growled under her breath at her cousin's ignorance.

'Don't go flaunting your royalty here, cousin.' Namorita spat. 'If you'll remember correctly, I sat on Atlantis' throne too. I have as much right to walk freely on the Surface World as anybody!'

Namor glared at his cousin and took her by the arm.

'Come now, cousin.' Namor demanded. 'You are needed back in Atlantis.'

'The Hell she is!' Clint hissed as he brandished a baseball bat that he had picked from a nearby stall. 'Get your stinking hands off her, you damned dirty fish-man!'

When Namor didn't do as he was told, Clint smashed the baseball bat upside his head.

Being nigh invulnerable as he was, Namor hardly felt the blow. He just turned to regard Clint once more.

'You shall pay for defiling my personage with your touch.' Namor growled.

'Oh, crap…' Clint groaned. 'This is gonna suck.'

Avengers Complex: Meanwhile-

Back in the Avengers Complex, those Avengers that were not going out on dates were hanging out on the beach below the Complex. Vince, Tigra, Maddie, Vanessa, Vance and Angelica were making use of the time between missions.

Vance was presently sitting on an oversized inflatable ring in the sea and was using his telekinesis to propel himself through the water.

'Hey Angel! Look at me!' Vance called over, waving maniacally. 'Angel! You're not looking! Hey! Loooook!' He started to whine about it.

'Of course I'm looking, dear.' Angelica mumbled, not even looking up from the book she was reading. 'Very nice.'

'Is it me or has Vance been at the sugar again?' Tigra chuckled as she looked at her teammate over the brim of her sunglasses.

'It's not you.' Angelica chuckled in return. 'Vance hasn't been at the sugar either. He always gets like this when he's around the sea. It's what he gets after being brought up in the big city, I guess.'

'I know the feeling.' Tigra nodded. 'I'm a big city girl at heart myself.'

'And how exactly do you manage with the sand in your fur?' Angelica asked. 'Your fur must get clogged something terrible.'

'Tell me about it.' Tigra sniffed as she picked at a clump of sand stuck in the fur on her legs. 'Getting sand out of my fur is a bitch!'

'Why don't you just change back to normal?' Angelica suggested. 'Surely that would be more suitable.'

'This is normal to me.' Tigra replied as she indicated her furry hide. 'I haven't used my human form since…'

'Vince.' Angelica deduced. 'Do you think he digs the fuzzy chick?'

'I'm not sure.' Tigra sighed. 'He's never even seen my human form. I know he likes Tigra, but… what if he doesn't like Greer?'

'I guess you'll just have to take that chance.' Angelica shrugged. 'There's no harm in trying, right?'

'I guess.' Tigra shrugged.

'Speak of the devil…' Angelica smirked as she saw a figure approach. 'Here he is now.'

'Heads up, everybody.' Vince whispered in warning as he walked up with a cooler full of drinks. 'Lovers' tiff at three o'clock!'

Angelica and Tigra both turned to see two arguing figures standing at the bottom of the steps that led from the Complex down to the beach. Maddie and Vanessa were having yet another argument. It had been this way ever since Maddie had returned from a Summers family reunion with Baby Gabriel. (1)

'I can't believe you're being so selfish!' Maddie hissed as she held Gabriel close to her.

'I'm not being selfish!' Vanessa responded. 'I'm just saying that you're spending too much time with that damn baby! What happened to our special time?'

'Do you see what I mean?' Maddie grumbled. 'You're being selfish. Looking after a baby is a full-time task. I'm sorry that we haven't been able to get together as much as we used to, but the baby is my top priority now.'

'The kid isn't even yours!' Vanessa spat.

'Well, he's the clone of my son reverted to infancy, so he kind of is my child.' Maddie responded. 'I don't want to fail Gabriel like I did with Nathan. Please, you have to see where I'm coming from.'

Vanessa just sniffed angrily and turned her back before walking away.

'Vanessa? Where are you going?' Maddie asked as she watched the receding figure of her partner. 'You're not leaving, are you?'

'I'm going out.' Vanessa replied, not even turning to look at Maddie. 'Don't know what time I'll be back.'

'Fine.' Maddie sniffed. 'Be that way then. You're acting pretty immature. Being jealous of a baby. I thought you were better than this.'

Vanessa didn't answer as she headed up the steps back to the Complex.

Downtown-

'Namor, no!' Namorita yelled as she watched her cousin send Clint smashing through the window of a nearby sporting goods store with a colossal punch. 'You idiot! You could've killed him!'

'I do not think so, cousin.' Namor snorted as he turned to regard his younger cousin. 'The Avengers are a hardy lot. Unfortunately. Now, come along. We have much to discuss.'

'Like hell we do!' Namorita sneered as she swatted Namor's hand away. 'I have as much right to be here as much as anybody else. And I don't walk around causing stupid fights over petty jealousy!'

'Jealousy?' Namor sputtered. 'I am not jealous!'

'Are too.' Namorita responded. 'You think that I can't have a love life just because Sue Storm doesn't return your advances. You're like a freaking stalker!'

'You had best watch your tongue.' Namor warned. 'Cousin or not, I will not accept such insolence.'

'And just what will you do if I continue?' Namorita challenged. 'You gonna banish me or something? You going to ground me? Kick my ass? I'd like to see you try.'

'I did not come here for a fight.' Namor explained.

'Coulda fooled me.'

'What in Neptune's na…AHHH!'

Namor bellowed in rage as an arrow protruded from his chest.

'God bless arrows with adamantium tips.' Clint grinned as he nocked another arrow in a bow. 'C'mon Fish-Face, Gimmie an excuse to use this!'

'Clint, don't!' Namorita pleaded. 'Please. There's no need to fight like this. Let's just sit down and act like responsible adults. Okay?'

'You shoulda said that to your cousin before he smashed me through a freaking window.' Clint sniffed, still pointing the bow at Namor.

'You should have thought of that before you even intended to touch Royal flesh.' Namor responded. 'You are not worthy to court my cousin.'

'Hey!' Namorita yelled. 'I'd like to have a word in edgewise if you don't mind.'

Namorita looked her cousin straight in the eye and poked him in the chest.

'I will choose to court whoever I damn well wish.' Namorita explained. 'Whether you approve of them or not. Clint is a wonderful man and I can see the relationship going very far.'

'Really?' Clint blinked. 'Wow. You really like me?'

'When you're not shooting my cousin full of arrows.' Namorita nodded. 'Now, what do you say you put the bow down?'

'Only if Subby stands down too.' Clint replied.

'Namor?' Namorita asked as she turned to regard her cousin.

'Very well.' Namor sighed. 'You have no need to fear me now.'

'That's better.' Namorita nodded. 'Now, what do you guys say you both buy me a drink? I'm parched.'

The trio never got anywhere as a star-spangled figure ran up to meet them.

'What in Liberty's name went on here?' Captain America asked as he looked about at the smashed storefronts.

'What?' Clint snickered. 'No hug? Or are you just checking up on the wayward kiddies?'

'I asked the very same thing, Barton.' Pietro added as he ran up with Crystal, Wanda and Luna close behind.

'Long story short…' Namorita began. 'My cousin decided that he would pop in and rag on my choice of dates. Things went out of hand. People got smashed through storefronts. The end.'

'Gee, you suck, Subby.' Luna snickered.

'Luna!' Crystal hissed. 'Shush.'

'Well, he does.' Luna sniffed.

'Namor, we really have to talk about this…' Cap sighed as he stepped up to his old friend. 'You can't just invade when you don't agree on your cousin's choice of men.'

'Umm, excuse me?' Clint piped up. 'Not that I wanna undermine your authority or anything but… Malibu is under our protection. I'm the leader of the West Coast Avengers and I should be giving Subby the speech.'

'Under these circumstances, I don't think that would be such a good idea, babe.' Namorita countered as she patted Clint on the shoulder in comfort. 'Just let Cap do his job, 'kay? My cousin will hear Cap out. After all, they have known each other since The War.'

'Better not make a habit of this, is all I'm saying.' Clint sniffed.

'And to think the big news a short while ago was the fact that Steve and I were having red-hot monkey sex.' Wanda chuckled.

'You and Cap are doing what?' Clint sputtered.

'Perhaps now isn't such a good time.' Wanda winced.

TBC…

Next: The Next Step

Angelica and Tigra go on a girls' night out while their other halves go bowling. When the time comes for Vince and Tigra to take the next step in their relationship, which one will Vince prefer, Tigra or Greer? Tune in next time to find out…

Notes-

(1)- Maddie, Jean Grey, Rachel Grey and Cable used their telekinesis on Stryfe to scamble his molecules and reverted him to childhood. Maddie then named him Gabriel, cuz Stryfe is acrappy name for a baby.