Blair leads Chuck back through the maze of cubicles to her office. She offers him some coffee, which he refuses, and she pours herself one. Only after she sits down behind her long, imposing desk does she finally ask him why he's come to see her after all these years.
"What do you want, Chuck?"
They both know Blair is asking more than the intention of his visit. Why has he come here after all these years. Why now. Why when she hasn't talked to him since the divorce.
"A business proposition, Blair." Chuck says, leaning back into the chair across from her desk, propping one leg on his opposite knee and looking confident.
Blair feels the tension leave her body and she relaxes. The last thing she needs at the moment is Chuck Bass further complicating her life with his ridiculousness, so a business visit is the only thing she thinks she could handle.
Chuck tells her that he saw the Waldorf Designs store that she just opened in Hong Kong, and Bass Industries is working on developing a huge shopping mall in neighboring Macau, and he'd like her to consider putting in another store, and it would be one of the cornerstone shops in the complex. It's a great opportunity, and Blair immediately recognizes it.
"I come to Paris regularly," Chuck purrs, "so I thought I'd stop by and ask instead of having my head of marketing contact your head of marketing, make it a little more personal."
Blair is surprised how comfortable she and Chuck are and she thinks that time can actually heal some wounds, and she is happy to find that she feels like she's sitting across from an old friend, not from her ex-husband or the man she once thought was the love of her life.
"What brings you to Paris regularly?" Blair asks, because an old friend would ask, and she's curious. What has Chuck been doing with his life for the last decade, besides building Bass Industries into a mega empire. Chuck smile and Blair sees something she thought she'd never see on Chuck Bass' face. Happiness.
"Do you remember Eva?" Chuck asks. Blair blinks then laughs. She does remember Eva, who was too sweet and too good, and Blair had made it her job to bring her down. Eva, who brought out the good side of Chuck and had made Blair insane with jealousy.
"You're seeing her?"
It seems that it's not only Blair who is intent on revisiting the past. Here Chuck is trying to remake things, trying again.
"Three years now," Chuck says. He tells her that they ran into each other at a fundraiser, just a crazy coincidence, and she was as wonderful as he remembered, and he'd asked her out and she said yes, and the rest is history. Eva had an art gallery in Paris, so Chuck split his time between here and Hong Kong, and they were very happy. Blair is happy for them.
"I guess if it works," Blair says, feeling a little twinge of guilt that she'd never been willing to make it work, always focused on her career, not wanting to bend to Chuck's will. Chuck seems to sense this line of thought because he erases all her guilt with his next words.
"You never would have been happy with that arrangement, Blair, or happy with me for that fact. . You didn't love me and Eva does. Nothing can work if both people don't love each other."
His words sting. Blair wants to protest, but Chuck is right. She didn't love him. She loved the idea of loving him. Even when you've moved past it, sometimes the truth can hurt.
"I'm sorry." Blair murmurs, and she's sincere. She wishes things had turned out differently, for more than one reason.
"It doesn't really matter," Chuck answers. "It was a long time ago."
A very long time ago.
They sit without talking, giving their past relationship a respectful moment of silence. Then Chuck speaks again, and Blair could have predicted he would ask her what comes next. What she doesn't predict is how she answers.
"What about you. Is there anyone in your life?"
Blair swallows. She thinks about Dan and her heart hurts, and she doesn't really want to share her anguish with anyone, let alone with Chuck Bass, but for some reason she doesn't lie or avoid the truth.
"Uh, yeah." Blair stutters and looks away, then tells him, "Dan Humphrey and I have been kind of seeing each other."
Kind of seeing each other, as in spending heady, wonderful days and fucking each others brains out and now all of that hangs in the balance, and Blair starts to realize that the reason is sitting in front of her.
She doesn't want Chuck back. She never loved him in the first place. It was the idea of love, and that her devotion to that idea led her to marry him and try to be the wife he wanted, and she lost herself in the process, and Blair can't quite let go of the feeling that marriage isn't a good thing. Marriage destroys people.
Chuck looks astonished for a brief moment, then his face is back to neutral and he smiles.
"Well, I thought you would have gone down that path years ago."
Blair blinks in surprise. Chuck has a look on his face, like he knows all her secrets and maybe he actually does.
"I know, Blair. I know you never loved me and that you loved him instead. I've known all along, even before we got married. I just thought I could change things, but you didn't love me, and I just couldn't change that no matter how much I tried, and honestly, I didn't really try that hard."
She feels the tears start again and Blair tells herself that she won't cry. Not now.
"I'm just surprised it took this long. I thought you'd run back to him as soon as you got rid of me."
"No." Blair says quietly. She didn't run back to Dan. She ran to her company, lived out her dream of being powerful, became someone meaningful in the fashion world. She pushed Dan and all other things personal to the back of her mind, shut them away and didn't let them escape. She didn't allow herself to actually deal with her mistakes, just avoided them. Maybe if she'd done things differently, maybe she wouldn't be here and Dan wouldn't be in California, and they'd have an entirely different life.
She had learned a long time ago that she can't build a life on a foundation of regrets. She can't think about what might have been. But now she was faced with her own actions fifteen years ago, her regrets staring at Blair in the face.
"Well, I'm glad you two have finally figured things out."
This is the point where the dam breaks. If you'd ever asked Blair Waldorf if there would be any moment in her life that she would pour her heart out to Chuck, her ex-husband, the man who cared more for practically anything and everything other than her, she would have laughed, and then maybe slapped you. But here she is, sitting across from him, and he's telling her that he's happy for her and Blair is entirely overwhelmed with her own unhappiness.
A tear slips down her cheek.
"We haven't figured things out," she tells Chuck. "Far from it."
Chuck leans forward and he actually looks like he cares, and Blair thinks that she likes this old, wiser Chuck.
"Do you want to know one thing that I'm sure of, Blair? One thing above everything else. Something I've known for a long time?"
She nods, thinking he's going to impart some sage wisdom, some life-changing quote, or maybe just some old, recycled advice, but then Chuck surprises her again.
"You love Dan, and he loves you, and nothing else matters."
"He wants to marry me." Blair says, her voice cracking. "and I love him and don't want anyone else, or to be anywhere else, but I'm scared."
Chuck looks thoughtful.
"Scared because of me? Because we failed?"
Blair nods, another tear slipping down her cheek. Chuck looks around her desk, spies a box of tissue and slides it her way. Blair grabs one and dabs at the tears.
"I meant it when I told you forever," Blair says quietly, and it's the truth. "But it wasn't forever, and I almost lost myself, and I don't feel like getting married does anything but complicate things."
She waits for Chuck to tell her she's an idiot, but again, he surprises her. He reaches across the desk and takes her hand in his and squeezes it.
"Listen to me, Blair Cordelia Waldorf," Chuck says. "None of that matters. You love Dan. You always have. He loves you. Fifteen years hasn't changed that. So marry him, like he wants you to. It's that simple."
"Is it?" Blair sniffs. "Is it really that simple?"
"Yes." Chuck answers. "It really is. Dan isn't me, and he's not going to hurt you like I did. It's that simple. Marry him."
Blair stands up and there is a burgeoning feeling of happiness growing inside her and she knows what she needs to do now. She walks around the desk and surprises Chuck by throwing her arms around him and hugging him with ferocity because she thinks he may have just saved her life.
"Thank you," Blair whispers. "Thank you so much."
She places a kiss on his cheek and Chuck smiles. It's the last time they'll see each other, at least for a long time. Waldorf Designs will open their Macau store six months later, and Blair will be at the opening, but she won't see Chuck, who will actually be in Paris at that time, helping Eva with her latest opening. Their paths don't cross despite their companies doing business together. But at this moment, Blair realizes that Chuck Bass was the only person who could give her closure. The only person who could unstick her. The only one who could provide the healing she needs.
"Say 'hi' to Dan for me."
"I will."
Then he's walking out of her office and Blair is standing there, staring after him, thinking how crazy life can be. She goes back to her chair and looks the clock on her desk. 2:00 pm. The sun will just be peeking over the eastern horizon, casting light over the ocean in Laguna Beach, and Blair imagines that Dan is alseep in his bed, his breathing steady, and she thinks she should wait a couple hours, wait for him to actually wake up, but she doesn't want to.
She picks up her phone and dials his number, waiting while it rings. Once. Twice. Three times. Blair thinks maybe he doesn't hear his phone ringing when Dan's voice comes on the other end and he sounds sleepy, his words a little slurred.
"Blair?" he asks, his voice hoarse, "is there something wrong?"
"Yes!" Blair blurts out, answering a question he asked her weeks ago, not really hearing what Dan said. The happiness inside her is growing and she feels like she might burst.
"What!" Dan's voice is concerned. "Did something happen?"
Blair realizes her mistake.
"I mean, uh, no, nothing's wrong." Blair stammers. "And I mean yes. Yes... I mean both, no and yes."
"Blair?"
Dan sounds a little more awake now, and his tone indicates that he might think she's a little crazy, and Blair tries to slow her rushing thoughts, tries to get out what she wants to tell him coherently.
"YES!" Blair squeals into the phone, and it feels so good to say it so she says it again and again, and Dan must really think she's crazy now. "Yes, yes, yes, yes."
Then she finally gets it out.
"Yes, I'll marry you."
There is silence on the other end of the phone, and Blair waits and waits, wanting him to say something. Then Dan speaks, his voice cracking,and he sounds happy.
"I'm on the next plane."
Yes.
TBC