A/N: the usual disclaimer, I do not own anything, it all belongs entirely to J K Rowling. Thank you for reviewing, following, favorite-ing and reading! I hope you enjoy this chapter, brace yourselves for a lot of insults.

THE NEXT DAY- LAST

LILY'S P.O.V

I roll out of bed at 6 am on the dot. Hogwarts today! This will be my sixth year and the start of studying for NEWTS. I stumble dizzily around Mar's room and throw my stuff into my case, get dressed and lug myself and the case down the two extra sets of stairs for breakfast.

Sirius, Mar and Alice and Remus are the only ones awake. All of them look a little drowsy but Sirius perks up when he sees me.

"Oi, Evans! Care to tell us what made Prongs so happy last night?" Sirius smirks to Remus.

"Good morning to you, too."

"So? We're dying to hear what happened! You didn't tell us anything yesterday," Alice leans forward eagerly.

"Didn't Potter tell you?" I ask Sirius.

"No! He refused to say anything, just came in with a soppy grin on his face."

"Oh, well he won the bet," I sit down awkwardly.

At that moment, Potter appears in the door way. He is indeed wearing a soppy grin.

"Morning all and Evans," he says cheerily.

"Anyway, he won the bet and then what, any details?" Mar says ignoring Potter's sudden appearance.

"Nothing happened. He won the bet, he kissed me. End of story," I feel guilty telling the lie and I see Mar and Alice's faces droop.

I get up to walk out. I get to the bottom of the first set of stairs and then somebody grabs my wrist. I turn and see Potter standing there.

"Let go of me, Potter."

He releases me almost instantly.

"Did it really mean nothing to you?" he asks.

"What?"

"The kiss," he says impatiently. "I was under the assumption that you liked it –"

"Well, you assumed wrong."

"So, we're not –"

"We never have been and never will be anything."

"You don't mean that, Evans."

"Bite me, Potter. I'd still take the giant squid over you."

I leave quickly before I say anything else I'll regret. I feel tears spark in my eyes but I blink them away. It's only Potter. The boy who teases and makes fun of you, the boy who bullies first years, the boy that hexes your ex-best-friend. You don't care about him. Not at all.

FOUR WEEKS LATER

LILY'S P.O.V

Things with James have gotten worse. His teasing is more mean than it is flirtatious, his comments have a bitterness rather than a light humour, his arrogance has grown twice as much and he's in non-stop trouble bullying first years and hexing people that do so much as look at him wrong. It's easy to forget that kiss when I can hate him as easily as I used to. Yet, some part of me doesn't fully despise him. Maybe Mar's right, maybe I am mad.

I sit in the library, I always read when I'm upset or angry – it helps me forget everything that's on my mind. This time, Potter and I had another argument and his words got to me more than they should have. He didn't call me a slut but he implied it, the same way as he implied that I was stupid and the same way he implied that I wasn't good enough to be here. His words send a blunt cut to me every time, they don't bleed very much but sometimes I get to many cuts in the same place and it hurts.

"Lily, I know you're upset but you need –" Remus appears opposite me.

"Why would you possibly think I was upset?" I say sarcastically.

"Come on, Lily. I didn't know he was going to say that."

"You didn't exactly stop him either."

"I can't control everything he says."

"No, but you could stick on my side."

"There aren't any sides."

"Right," I say exasperatedly. Remus never could stand up to the Marauders. "What do I need to do this time?"

"Apologise to James."

"Me, apologise to him. What did I do?"

"You said stuff as well, it takes two to have an argument."

"I'm not apologising until he apologises for being an insufferable git."

"Lily, please? It's really hard on us when you two fight."

"You think I like being insulted? You think I like my purity being insulted? You think I like my honour insulted? Do you think –?"

"You've made your point and no, he doesn't have any right to question a woman's chaste."

"So why am I apologising? He's being a sexist bastard."

"I know, but you said some hurtful stuff as well."

"It's nothing he hasn't heard before! He knows he's a bully and that he's a conceited, self-righteous and ignorant."

"Believe it or not, but James has feelings too. Imagine if he said those things to you."

I frown.

"I'd like him to imagine being called a slut."

"He didn't call you that."

"Yes, but we all knew he would have done if Frank Longbottom hadn't shut him up!"

"We wouldn't have let him –"

"Oh really? You didn't seem to be doing much but standing beside him while I got verbally attacked."

"It was an argument, not an assault."

"You console yourself with that, Remus. Sometimes I wonder where your moral judgement is."

He looks torn but I ignore it, snap my book shut and storm out of the library. People stare but I don't let it bother me. Apologise to Potter, now there's something I haven't heard before. I almost laugh.

SLUGHORN'S CHRISTMAS PARTY

LILY'S P.O.V

"Are you sure you're going to be okay, Lil?" Mar looks at me concernedly as she links arms with a cute Ravenclaw boy outside the Great Hall.

"Yes, it will be nice having the Common Room to myself for once. I might even get some work done."

"I don't want you to be on your own, though. Besides, what am I telling Slughorn?"

"Just tell him that I'm ill."

"Right you are, see you later, Lil."

"Don't get too drunk!" I call after and she laughs a response something like 'I will!'

I turn around to head back to Gryffindor Tower and come face-to-face with Potter. I scowl at him and walk away, quickly. I've been doing a lot of walking away recently.

"Wait up, Evans."

"Why? So you can insult me some more?" I carry on speed walking.

"You make me sound like a complete idiot."

"It doesn't take skill to make you sound like an idiot, you've been doing it for the last six years by yourself."

"Witty, Evans. I just wanted to talk, you know, like we used to."

"We never used to talk. I've always hated you because you're an insolent, disrespectful –"

"I'm not disrespectful."

"Yes, you are."

"No, I'm really not. Aren't you going to Slughorn's party this year?"

"I didn't want to go on my own and I didn't want people thinking I was a slut if I did go with someone –"

"You're not a slut, Evans."

"You've changed your tune, yesterday you told me that I was a dirty, stupid slag."

"No, I didn't!" he yelps.

"Something along those lines," I wave my hand dismissively. "You implied them and implying them is just as bad as actually saying them. Some girls have feelings, you know."

"I can be a gentleman, let me show you –"

"Oh I see, you're only being nice to me because you don't have a date and are sexually frustrated."

"I do have a date, her name's Lisa? Eliza? Lillian? Lauren?"

"Lucy. Her name is Lucy. So you do want two girls at once."

"You're so full of it, Evans. As if I'd want to kiss you and Lea."

"Lucy. Have you really been with so many girls that you can't remember their names?"

"Now you're making me sound like a player."

"You are a player. Weren't you going out with Rachel when I caught you kissing Vera?"

"Sh! That was a mistake. Besides, Rachel was kissing Ferdinand anyway."

"What about the other time when you were kissing Helena when you were going out with Thalia?"

"How did you know about that?"

"I caught you in Flitwick's classroom on Prefect patrols. I did shout at you."

"You shout at me so often, I can't even remember," then he smirks widely. "In fact, you shout so often, people passing by think that –"

"Don't even. I'm not in the mood for innuendos."

"Fine. What do you want to do?"

"I don't want to do anything, I still hate you. You're an inconsiderate player."

"I'm not saying you're wrong," I smirk triumphantly, "but I can be a nice person."

"I highly doubt that."

"What is your problem, Evans? Do you want me to be mean to you? Does your big bad sister not love you? Is that the problem?"

My body swells up with anger.

"Don't you dare."

"Dare what? Is little Evansie missing her best fwend Snivellus, too?" he says, patronisingly.

"Shut up! You have no right to say things like that."

"It's called freedom of speech, Evans. I don't expect you've heard of it, what with ickle Snivelly protecting you from everything. Where is Snivelly now, Evans?"

"Piss off! It's none of your business and I've moved on from that. No thanks to you."

"I think you'll find it's all thanks to me. That piece of shit deserves everything he gets."

"You're not law, court and order, Potter."

"Evans, you're insults aren't as good anymore. Come on, give me your best."

"I'm not bothering with you, Potter, I don't need to insult you; nature's already done that for me."

"Mature, Evans."

"You started it and who are you to call me immature?"

"What does that mean?"

"Exactly what I said! You're an immature, arrogant toerag who swaggers around the place, kissing girls, insulting first years, getting into trouble and relying on Remus to get you out. You're so incapable and blind! Remus saves your neck more than he cares to admit."

"Maybe you don't understand the concept of friends, Evans. We help each other out, not that you would know."

"What does that mean?"

"I wouldn't be friends with you, you're too needy, and always getting your feelings hurt, somebody's always got to protect you –"

"I'm perfect capable of looking after myself, I don't ask people to help me!"

"Are you sure, it's always something with you, isn't it? You're always so defensive and when people get through to you, you lie. Remember last summer?"

"I did what I did, I'm not the only one who makes mistakes."

"There you go again, why do you have to be such a BITCH?"

I feel my whole body zone out.

All I can hear is Potter saying: why do you have to be such a bitch? Why do you have to be such a bitch? Why do you have to be such a bitch? Why do you have to be such a bitch?

Then there is darkness.