Keep this scene inside your head, as the bruises turn to yellow, and the swelling goes down.

And if you're ever around, in the city or the suburbs, of this town,
Be sure to come around…

Fire. That was the feeling that I felt in my veins as he kept moving his lips against mine. My whole body was on fire.

I felt my knees getting weak as he slid his hands to my lower back sending chills down my spine. This was wrong. But this was great. It felt great. It felt good. It felt like fire.

Suddenly it didn't.

Suddenly my lips were free and Edward was pushed up against the wall and Jacob was holding him by his collar.

"Don't you ever touch her." He looked at him with bloodshot eyes making me gasp. "You little piece of shit."

"Who are you to tell me to whom I can touch or can't? She obviously doesn't want you to touch her you -"

I screamed out and felt my voice crack as he slammed Edward against the wall making a booming sound. "Jake, stop!"

"Jacob, stop it!" By this time people were already surrounding us, making a small circle around us. In just a blink of an eye, Jacob was off of Edward and on the ground. I think I heard Jacob's bones breaking as Edwards fist collided with his face.

"James!" I yelled as loud as possible repeating it multiple times hoping he would hear me. Edward was holding his fist up in the air looking at Jacob with all the rage he could feel.

"Go on. Enjoy my sloppy seconds." Jacob blurted out and Edward punched him again and again…

"JAMES!"

Finally he rushed through the sea of people and in a heartbeat, Edward was off of Jacob and pushed up against the wall. James was holding him hard but still struggled as Edward kept pushing him off.

"Oh my God, Jake." My hands flew to my mouth as I saw his face. It was all messed up and bloody. He stood up in a swift movement and whipped his face to me.

"Jake…"

He shot me deadly glare before turning to face Edward.

"She's not worth it, you know?" was all he said.

I'd never felt so ashamed in my life like right now at this moment. Luckily for me, Rose was already by my side holding onto my hand.

"Let's get out of here." She said pulling out of the house with Jasper and Emmett following us.

xZx

Numb. That was how I felt. Worthless. I felt small and pointless. The love of my life didn't want me back. He never wanted me. I took another drag of my blunt.

How could I have been so stupid? Why was I doing this to myself over and over again? I keep promising myself to forget him and move on, but all I did was whine and cry over him.

I was a liar. I lied to myself all the time.

I didn't know where I was or what time it was. All I knew was that I wasn't alone.

As soon as Rose got me out of that house, she pushed me into Emmett's car and that was the last thing I remembered.

Now I was in a room. A dark room. Maybe a basement. But a nice basement. It felt warm and cozy. The loud music was sending vibrating feelings through my body and I took another drag. I just wanted to get fucked up.

The boy's lips were on my neck. Licking and sucking. I took one last drag and smashed the blunt into an ashtray.

He kept kissing my neck and I let his hands wander around my body. It was good to feel wanted. Finally his lips reached mine and I moved so now I was sleeping on my back with him on top of me. I knew I would regret this tomorrow, but at this point I didn't care…

xZx

It was probably already morning when I opened my eyes. And as I predicted, the shower of guilt and regret washed all over me. I felt my forehead pressed up against the warm body and someone's hand wrapped around my waist holding me close.

I usually didn't do things like this. I wasn't the one for one night stands since I had just one boyfriend for years. But I guess my drunk-ass-high-ass Bella was looking for some rebound sex or just kind of any attention or she just wanted to be wanted. Yes, that was definitely it…I couldn't remember the last time I felt wanted. Like really wanted.

I opened my eyes to face my drunken mistake. My eyes locked with piercing blue ones. Almost violet. I felt terrified on the inside, but numb on the outside. What had I done?

Jasper. Fuck my life.

Instead of freaking out and jumping out of bed, he pulled me closer and pushed his lips against mine. Shit just got messed up.

xZx

I felt like my insides were going to explode. For the first time in my life, there was something I couldn't discuss with Rosalie and it nearly killed me inside. I needed to get this out of my system but I couldn't.

After he kissed me, I couldn't stop him or myself for that matter so I just kissed him back. After our little make out session he went to the bathroom. It turned out that we were at Emmett's house, which wasn't far away from mine, so while Jasper was in bathroom I quickly put on my clothes and ran. Yes. I ran.

It was already noon and my phone was buzzing constantly. I had multiple missed calls from Rosalie. Texts from James; he was wondering if I was okay. Texts of multiple apologies from Edward and a text from Jake saying he needed to see me. The last one clearly got my attention and I was dumb Bella again when I texted him back to come over.

Jasper was calling me, too, but I just couldn't even think of him right now. I still felt kind of dirty and sick to my stomach. Not sick of Jasper. Just sick of myself. I'd never done things like this so it was something new for me and I promised not to make a habit out of it.

Rosalie was calling me for like the tenth time so I gave up and answered. "Hey." My voice cracked a little as I spoke.

"Hey, bitch. Where did you go?" She didn't sounded mad that I had ignored her all they and I felt relieved.

"Home."

"Why?"

"Because I live here?"

"Okay, don't say. How are you? Are you okay? Edward feels pretty guilty. He looks like a big giant ass mess."

"Well he should. Did you see how he attacked Jake?" I knew I shouldn't be blaming Edward because Jake attacked him first, but I couldn't bring myself to not to take Jake's side. Bad old habit, I guessed.

"Yeah, but he was only defending you."

"I know." I admitted. "Talk to you later?" I asked once I heard the knock on my front door.

"Okay. Bye." She hung up and I threw my phone on the bed.

xZx

"Are you for real?" Suddenly these past few weeks felt like a fucking joke. Was God really playing some stupid ass joke on me?

"Yes. I'm moving today." He said without emotion. I tried to play our conversation back a little repeating it again in my head.

"Away." I spoke it out loud hoping that I would believe it somehow. But it still felt like a joke. "When did you find out?" I swallowed the tears as they tried to break out. As much as I wished for him to be out of my life, I was still in love with him. And it hurt like hell knowing that I wouldn't be seeing him anymore.

"Like few days ago." He knew this for days and still acted that way towards me? Did I really meant shit to him?

"I can't believe it." I said dropping my head on my knees not tearing my eyes away from Jacob. He came here to say goodbye and apologize for his behavior. He felt bad when he found out that he can't make it up to me anymore because he's leaving.

"I couldn't either, but it's happening. So I just hope you can forgive me. I want to go away knowing that you won't hate me."

"I don't hate you. I'm just mad at everything you did. "

"Well…that's better that hate."

"It is."

"I'm really sorry I fucked up."

"Yeah…"

"Forgive me if you can about the all horrible things I've done. I really did love you."

"I really loved you too."

"I will miss you Bella. And you mean a lot to me. You know that."

"I don't, actually."

"Of course you don't." He said standing up. "I have to go. Take care of yourself, Bella." I stood up to walk him to my front door and I knew that the minute he walked out that door, he would be gone forever.

"Take care." That was it. Just like that. No tears. Nothing. It was for the best. Even though I felt sad I wouldn't see him anymore, I felt somehow free from him.