Author's Note: Thank you all for your comments, as always! This chapter did take a little more time, but it is the first one I have written from scratch so I hope everyone can forgive me! I feel like my wordings and writing style are a little different than normal and I'm not sure why that is. I will try and go back and review it at a later date, when I'm back in the flow of it again, just to improve the differences/mistakes. I won't make any promises on an updating schedule as I really have no idea how things will be, though I will try my hardest to keep things flowing when I can. Your support keeps me going and I do thank you all for it - it keeps me going! I am certainly glad people seem to be enjoying this story anyway, as that is all I want when I write :)
Obviously, we come to Winterfell now and things are gonna be different! There will of course be a few familiar characters appearing, who I hope people will be happy to see! I'm not sure if I've got some characterisations right, but hopefully people will let me know how I'm doing and if anyone slips out of character! I'll be sure to correct it if I do.
Thanks again, I'll update when I can :) Please leave a comment on what you think!
-Jemlou
Chapter Ten
My neck was aching when I awoke from my slumber, having been angled awkwardly against the carriage side the entire time. It was quite rare that I would fall asleep during the day-time journeys; the swaying of the carriage certainly did not help me sleep, but sometimes there were exceptions. The world was still swaying when I felt myself regain consciousness and I could still hear the clatter of hooves against hard ground outside, along with the mis-mash of the Stark soldiers talking to one another. When my senses further returned, I could also make out the much closer chatter of two familiar voices and I did not need to open my eyes to guess who they belonged to. With a grimace, I straightened out my neck, feeling the aching immediately when I did so, and opened my eyes to take in the world around me.
"Ah, you have re-joined us again, Miriella." Lady Stark's voice laughed pleasantly, and I turned to send the woman a strained smile. Hers was much less wary in return. "You will be pleased to know that we will be at Winterfell very soon." While I may not have shared the same enthusiasm - I wasn't about to see my children again after so long apart - I could still appreciate the fact that the wariness of our travelling was drawing to an end.
"That's good to hear." I murmured, attempting to stretch what I could in the limited space I had. Sparing a glance outside, I could see the grassy stretches of hillsides once more, endless out towards the horizon, and a brief thought crossed my mind as I eyed the very much green ground. I hope it has snowed for you when we go back there, Robb's words echoed in my mind. The King's hopes had not prevailed, it seemed. It had not snowed, after all.
My next thoughts were of relief - we would finally be sleeping in proper comfort that evening and though I was forced to share it with another, I would welcome it all the same. Once we reached Winterfell, once I was introduced to my new home, things could start to heal. I continued to tell myself that the Northern Fortress would grow to become my home and the people within would soon liken to my own family - many talks with Lady Catelyn during our confined journey together had given me this mind-set. While I knew nothing could replace the love I held for certain sisters in my family, I still hoped that I would find comfort in others' presences after I had settled in. The idea of a life-time of loneliness certainly was not appealing. Reaching Winterfell also meant that things may look up for my husband's and my relationship. Perhaps once everything had settled, we would begin to feel more comfortable around each other and become friends - I refused to believe I would fall in love with the man; I was not quite ready for such a revelation just yet. The endless amounts of awkward times together during our journey from the Twins to Winterfell were certainly growing wary on me - almost as much as the travelling itself - and I could only hope that things would look up once our journey finally drew to a close. Perhaps in the comfort of the man's home, he would feel more at ease with me? I could hope.
Outside, the passing world looked quite dull in colour. The sky was not particularly bright and the only colours that graced the lands, it seemed, were green and grey. Frowning to myself, I found that my nerves began to grow at each turn of the carriage wheels. While I may have looked forward to setting foot on steady ground again, the end point of our journey was suddenly not that welcoming to me. The further we travelled through these colourless lands, the closer we would get to Winterfell; my new home.
I had never really thought about the ending of this journey, only that I could not wait to leave the confinements of the carriage for good. I had not really considered what would happen when we got there. Of course, the Stark party would feel no unease about the return - it was their home, after all - though it was a different story to me. I was the outsider, the unknown woman that had all so suddenly taken claim as their Queen. A niggling feeling in my stomach told me that my welcome at Winterfell would be anything but warm and yet I forced myself not to worry. A little wariness and uncertainty was to be expected from the people - they did not know me and could not be expected to welcome me as their Queen so readily. At least, I thought, I had Esma at my side through it all; a friendly face and all that. The presence of Lady Catelyn helped too as the woman had apparently grown quite at ease in my company, as I had done in hers. It was a great upside of being cooped up alone together for such a long time, I realised, and Lady Brienne was certainly not displeasing towards me either. At least I was not alone, I thought to myself. I could try and convince myself of that.
A few hours after waking from my uncomfortable slumber, passing the time with quiet words shared with my companions, a sudden holler outside caught all of our attentions and halted Lady Catelyn mid-sentence of her comment about the mis-givings of too much alcohol consumption.
"Winterfell has been sighted, your grace; my lady." Lady Brienne called through the open window from her position riding along side the carriage. There was a pleasant enough smile on the female knight's face and when I turned back to the other two beside me, I saw a larger smile stretch across the older woman's lips. I returned Lady Stark's joyous smile, though could not help but feel my stomach turning at the thought of our approach. We truly were at the end, I realised, and now it was time to face the world I was now to live in. Strangely, I found myself wishing the journey was longer as I sunk back into the comfort of my seat.
The wail of a horn sounded off somewhere close by and I briefly thought it may have been to alert the Keep of our approach, though it was only a guess. My mind was suddenly warped with nerves as I tugged at the hem of my sleeve, knowing that the weight of countless unknown eyes would be on me soon, ready to judge everything I did. I swallowed thickly as I eyed the procession outside, trying to calm myself and remember who I was. Though then again; who was I? Miriella Frey? Miriella Stark? Queen in the North?
"Are you alright, Lady Miriella?" Esma asked quietly. "You look a little pale." Quickly, I nodded.
"Aye." When I took note of Esma's and Lady Catelyn's matching expressions though, I added; "Just nervous."
"I understand; I was much the same when I was made to leave home and marry Ned." Lady Stark hummed her concerns, though her excitement did not waver. "Once you get settled, everything will be better. I can promise you that." I nodded absently, unsure I really wanted to keep the conversation up much longer. Thankfully it was dropped and replaced with awe as Lady Catelyn stared out the window to eye her approaching home. Esma joined her, gasping slightly in surprise at the sight she saw and after taking a deep breath, I leaned my head out the open window to behold the Keep too.
The Northern Fortress sat upon a hill in the distance, looking every bit as strong as I had imagined it to be - towers high and walls strong. Briefly, I thought about Shirei's many tales about the place, wondering if reality could compare to the stories of Winterfell Shirei had often read and told me about. It was every bit as dark as the Twins were, towered with stone and standing tall - though not as tall as my past home had been. The walls around it looked defensive; looking almost impenetrable and able to withstand anything, in my eyes. It was awe-worthy, indeed. Certainly a fit enough place to house the King in the North and his Starks, I decided. The Keep itself looked larger than life, spaced out across a large space of land with the cluster of trees canopying over some of the higher walls. Winterfell looked every bit as magnificent as I had imagined.
As we approached though, I began to see flaws within the foundations, something that could not be seen a distance away. There were chunks of stone missing from some of the exterior wall and by the looks of it, were in need of a lot work to fix the damage. When we passed in through the opened gates and over the threshold, the buildings within looked to be a similar state and I frowned with thought as I considered my previous thought that the place looked to be impenetrable. Recalling the Greyjoy's brief claim of Winterfell during the war, I did not need to ask how the damage of the Fortress had occurred. Even closer, there was evidence of fires and the thought churned my stomach slightly as I wondered how many people had died within the Keep's walls at the Greyjoys hands. I dreaded to think about the recent history of this place.
My consideration of Winterfell - my new home - did not last very long when we entered under archways and stone passageways - growing further into the Keep - and I found myself sinking back into my seat once more when I caught sight of people outside. The curiosity on their faces was clear to see and I knew they were studying our carriage as we passed, fully aware of whom it was escorting. Most were bowing, much to my dismay, and I forced myself not to look at them for too long. Clenching my fists, I glanced towards Lady Stark, noting the happiness on her face and finding that I could by no means match such emotion. Was I even expected to?
When the carriage - for the finally time of our journey - drew to a stand-still, I felt a heavy weight turn in the pit of my stomach. Hooves on the ground outside could be heard, as well as the collection of greeting voices and heavy footsteps. It did not take very long for the door to our carriage to open but when it did, I wished with everything I had that it would have just stayed closed for good.
"Lady Stark." Lady Brienne offered her hand towards the King's mother, who sat nearest to the door, and the woman took it without any hesitation, allowing her swordswoman to help her out the carriage. It shook with her shifting weight and once she had vanished from sight, I immediately heard her happy gasp along with higher-toned voices and knew Lady Catelyn was with her children once more. Esma shuffled along next, eyeing me with concern and offering me an encouraging smile before she too climbed out with Lady Brienne's assistance.
Alone, I found myself wanting to stay inside that confined space forever and never leave. I could feel the female knight's eyes boring into the side of my head as I attempting to compose myself and clear my nervous thoughts.
"There are not many gathered out here, your grace. The courtyard has been cleared for the King's party so only the Stark children and the King's council are here to greet you." Lady Brienne quickly offered and I found comfort in her words. That did not seem too much to handle.
"You'll be fine." I told myself quietly, shuffling along the bench until I reached the door. Meeting Lady Brienne's gaze, I saw the essence of a smile on her lips and found myself also comforted by such a simple act. Eyeing her out-stretched hand, I hesitated before reluctantly taking it. Her grip was firm as she grasped mine and I was glad for it as she pulled me gently out the carriage, out to face the world.
The air was cool outside and I found myself breathing deeply to calm my nerves. The first thing I noted was that we were in a large courtyard and that many of the Stark soldiers that had accompanied us, surrounded the carriage as they unloaded their journey's supplies and busied about their horses. The second thing I noted was that, just like Lady Brienne had said, there weren't that many unknown faces to greet us and for that I was glad for - I had half expected a crowd waiting and the alternative certainly was welcoming. A small gathering of people I did not know stood towards the main entrance of the building the courtyard led out from and judging by the presence of Lady Catelyn and Robb with them, it did not take me long to work out who they were.
Lady Stark was embracing a young boy, speaking quick words that I could not make out, while Robb had the arms of an older girl - though much younger than myself - wrapped around his waist. Stood nearby were a small group of men, who were grinning happily and speaking to my husband with booming voices and I guessed that they were more of his soldiers, though perhaps a little higher up than the ones I had met already. When I recalled Lady Brienne's words, I realised that they must have been my husband's council. An almost crazed looking woman stood a little way back from were Lady Stark and her youngest son embraced, eyeing the scene with a strangely mellow smile in comparison to her visage.
Their happiness was evident, even from my distance away and even just witnessing such a scene made me feel like intruding. Lady Brienne had made no move to make me approach them but I knew that it would be inevitable sooner or later. I continued to study them in silence, the blonde knight at my side in equal wordlessness, and I could not help the growing feeling of sadness over-whelm me. Such a familial sight made me wish to be with my own and the hollowness in my chest began to feel more prominent now as I urged with every being I had, to embrace Shirei with such love that Lady Stark did with her son right now. I did not want to be in Winterfell, I wanted to be home with the people I was used to, with the people I loved. My loneliness had never been more present than it was in that moment.
Once Lady Catelyn had finished embracing her son - Rickon, I knew him to be called - and had quickly placed a kiss to her daughter's head, I was surprised when her gaze swung behind, searching until she finally focused on Lady Brienne and myself. Almost immediately Robb's did the same, though his gaze did not linger as he backed away from his sister slightly, to speak with the men behind her. With a waving gesture and a smile, Lady Stark urged us over and I felt myself grow stock-still when the action was not missed by the others in her presence and every unknown gaze turned my way.
"Your grace?" Lady Brienne murmured softly, eyes expectant and her eyebrow raised.
"I know." I breathed back, nodding and breathing deeply. "Let's go." With a sigh, I raised my chin and together, Lady Brienne and I made our way over to the main Stark party.
I kept my gaze fixed between Lady Catelyn and her son, finding that I could only just and so meet their eyes, with the presence of the others staring at me. The King's mother was encouraging, smiling warmly as I approached, while Robb remained as tense as ever, looking just as unsure as I was feeling. Lady Brienne's presence still remained to be comforting and I tried to hold myself with the same strength she managed. With every step I took closer, I could feel my nerves settling and I was not sure what to expect of these people - I had a good idea of what they expected from me and I was not completely convinced that I could meet such demands. Not yet, anyway.
The chatter from Robb's men ceased once I grew nearer and when Lady Brienne and I finally did reach them, I was a little startled when everyone - except the Stark family - bowed towards me. The sight of such respect took me back a moment and I found myself turning to Robb with a frown, unsure what to do with such a display. Was I supposed to say something? Curtsy perhaps? In return to my frown, Robb quirked his lips slightly before patting the man nearest to him on the shoulder, thus leading to everyone straightening up once more - much to my relief.
"Gentlemen, this is Miriella Frey-" Lady Catelyn began, though I quickly cut her off.
"Miriella Stark now, my lady." I reminded her, gently, and she sent me a sure smile in response. Miriella Stark - it sounded strange coming from my own lips but I knew that I would have to grow used to it. Robb eyed me with a strange expression before turning back to his men and laying hand on the shoulder of the one nearest to him.
"These are the men of my council, Miriella." He explained and I eyed the three of them a polite smile. "Galbart Glover." Robb gestured vaguely to the shorter man out of the three, who bowed his head accordingly with a welcoming smile when I turned to him. His appearance was a lot stouter than the rest, his face friendly and open as he gazed back at me. I felt soothed to find no unwelcoming expression on his face, but kept wary as I turned to his companions. "Jon Umber-"
"Please do call me Greatjon, your grace." The man - Jon Umber - quickly cut in, grinning un-bashfully down at me without any qualms of forwardness. "Everyone else does." I took one look at the man, completely over-whelmed for a moment by his sheer size and knew it was no wonder he was known as 'Greatjon'. Taking in his expression, while he did not hold the same openness as Lord Galbart had, the grin seemed friendly enough and I could be thankful that he was not frowning, at least.
"And finally, my great-uncle; Brynden Tully." The last member of Robb's council was not as tall as Greatjon but possessed a lean structure that held him well. With a quirk of the lips, Robb's great-uncle bowed his head towards me and I, like I had with the others, smiling politely in return. Lord Brynden shared a lazy glance with Lady Catelyn - his niece - before clearing his throat and stepping towards me, his lips still tugged upwards only briefly.
"Welcome to Winterfell, my Queen." Holding out his hand towards me, expectantly. I eyed it for a moment, unsure what to do and spared brief glances towards Robb and Lady Stark before raising my own hand for him take. Lord Brynden spared no hesitation and placed a shiver of a kiss against my knuckles before dropping my hand and stepping back. I was thankful that the rest of Robb's council did not step forward then to do the same.
"Thank you, my lord." The man's smirk grew at that and thankfully he said no more, instead eyeing his great-nephew meaningfully, without saying a word.
"And of course, these are my children." Lady Stark urged the two smallest members of the group forward, the boy looking reluctant as he clutched his mother's hand tightly. I noticed that Robb's sister - Arya - was staring up at me with a strange frown on her face and I could not help but take in the youngest Stark girl with all her curiosity.
Her hair was short, that was the first thing I noticed. Other than Lady Brienne, I had never seen a woman - or a girl - wear their hair cropped that short and yet Arya was apparently another to the exception. Her expression was creased with a heavy frown, her eyebrows burrowed and her lips pouted downwards, as she studied me and even though no welcome warmed her face, I could not help but quickly compare her to her mother and brother. Arya seemed unlike her mother in elegance and face, her eyes and complexion much darker than Lady Stark's Tully-self - I gathered she had more Stark in her than Tully. She did not possess Robb's piercingly blue eyes, but they were piercing all the same. Briefly, I eyed the breeches that she wore and the rugged cut of her clothes, realising - with relief - that perhaps I would not be the only female in Winterfell not to be wearing a dress, after all.
"Rickon; my youngest born." The youngest Stark was timid to say the least, hiding beside his mother's skirts upon greeting me. It seemed unlikely that the young boy would speak, but I tried to smile in a way that I would to sooth Shirei when he did catch my eyes, hoping to calm the boy's nerves. His long, curly hair hid most of his face so I could not make out much of the boy but hoped in the time that young Rickon would grow used to me. Over Lady Stark's shoulder, I could not help but notice the crazed woman still lingering, her presence ignored by everyone. Her mellow smile was gone now and instead, I noticed a similar frown to the Stark girl's on her face as she eyed the scene before her. "And Arya; my youngest daughter."
"It's um," I swallowed thickly. "It's a pleasure to meet you both." Neither of them said anything and while Rickon turned away once more, Arya's stare did not waver. Unnervingly so.
"How was your journey, your graces?" Lord Glover asked, pleasantly, his gaze jumping between Robb and I.
"Tiring." Robb replied with a sigh, running a hand through his curls. "Gods knows it is good to be home again." I said nothing, my chest pinching at the mention of home.
"Do not fear." Lord Umber - calling the man Greatjon sounded a little strange, I decided - grinned firmly. "There is a feast arranged for the evening - to celebrate your return and to introduce our new Queen in the North to the people. And of course, to welcome her to Winterfell." The larger man continued grinning in my direction and I forced one of my own out in return, unsure the idea of celebrating was such a pleasing one. Especially when it was in my name. Name-days were bad enough, I could not imagine what the welcoming feast of a Queen would be like. I suppressed a grimace at the thought. "I'm sure that'll help after your tiring journey!"
"Though I am sure our Queen is very tired from her travels." Lord Brynden drawled, suddenly, his eyes boring into mine. "Perhaps she should rest before the celebrations?" Still I said nothing, not sure I liked being spoke about in such a way, but realising that the concept of rest was very, very inviting. Anything to be alone right now, I decided.
"Aye, that sounds like a good idea." Robb nodded, sparing me the briefest of glances, not even waiting for a response before continuing. "Before the evening, I would very much like an update of everything that had occurred in my absence. My lords, shall we head to the council quarters to discuss matters? Mother, could you escort Miriella-?"
"Robb." His mother cut him off, harshly, startling me by her tone. I studied the stern expression on her face, almost as if she was scolding him, while Robb stared coolly back with a frown. Shifting awkwardly, I eyed the council men and noticed their shared looks and for a moment, no one said anything while the King and his mother stared one another down. Something twitched in Robb's expression and I did not miss the way Lady Catelyn's eyes swung to me for the briefest of moments and back again. My husband's eyes narrowed in return and all too suddenly, his frown turned straight and he stood up taller, looking far more over-powering than he should be allowed. Robb's gazed around the courtyard briefly before stopping on some sight over my shoulder.
"Lady Brienne, may you please go and ask Lady Dacey to escort my wife to our chambers? I suppose my mother will not want to part with my siblings just yet and I cannot ask you to leave my mother's side." He turned back to his mother with a hard expression and I heard Lady Brienne turn and leave my side, heading over to this 'Lady Dacey' as the King requested. No one said anything more and after Robb placed a kiss on both Arya's and Rickon's heads, he turned to me briefly to provide a single nod and a; "I shall see you later this afternoon, Miriella" before leaving with his council men. His mother's following stare was furious to say the least and while I could imagine the rest were feeling awkward by the exchange, I was no stranger to Robb's dismissal and instead sighed softly at his display.
When Lady Catelyn turned back to me, I saw the forced smile on her face and tried to push away what pity there was held there. Instead I forced a smile, hoping she would leave it alone, and was thankful when she finally did. Instead Lady Catelyn patted her son's head lightly before turning over her shoulder to eye the crazed looking woman that still remained nearby.
"I am just going to speak with Osha, Miriella. Lady Dacey will take you to your room. Please do ask if you need anything, it is no bother. Try to rest before dinner, I can imagine the celebrations will be equally as tiring as our journey has been." I nodded once, watching as Lady Stark headed towards where the crazed woman - Osha - stood, leaving me in the company of only her daughter now as her son refused to leave her side. Arya's stare still remained and I stared back coolly, unsure what was with her scrutiny. In just her company, I mulled over what to say to the girl. Should I tried and get to know her? Should I speak of her brother and mother? What was expected in this situation? Thankfully though, I was saved asking any questions as the younger girl asked one herself.
"Why aren't you wearing a dress?" She asked, to-the-point. At her bluntness, I raised an eyebrow but recalled all the times both Robb and his mother had likened the girl to my sister, Waldra. Thinking about my oldest sister then, I imagined her before me now and without much hesitation, I replied;
"Why aren't you?" My tone was not as rude as I would have used when addressing Waldra but after a few moments of silence between us, I began to wonder if maybe I should have just stuck to being polite with the Stark girl. Arya stared up at me now with a contemplative expression, a little shock lingering on her face by my words and her gaze swung down to the clothes she wore before returning back to me again.
After an agonising few moments, the smallest of smirks lit up young Arya's face and I wondered if maybe the response had been a success.
Lady Dacey Mormont - as she introduced herself as - was only a little older than myself and was the second woman, beside Lady Brienne, that I had seen dressed in a suit of armour. She easily towered over than me, at least a head above mine, and held quite a slim, well-built form. Despite the layers of leather and armour that she wore though, Lady Dacey seemed to hold herself quite elegantly as she strode alongside me and I found this quite surprising in comparison to the other swordswoman I had met. Lady Brienne, while I knew was obviously female, still had a strong masculinity about her and seemed to behave more like a man in every respect I had observed her in. She walked with heavy strides, her posture was stiff and stocky, and overall Lady Brienne's armour stowed away her feminine body - if she even had one - leaving her standing large and almost clunky. Lady Dacey was different.
Her slim physique still managed to creep through the layers of armour and leather she wore and Lady Dacey did not, in any way, hold any sense of masculinity about her. She walked lightly, seeming in every way imaginable at ease with herself and how she held her body. Lady Dacey appeared confident in every way Lady Brienne did not and this was intriguing to me - to see such differences between the two women.
The young woman's face was thin and lean - just like her body - and she smiled only slightly when she greeted me, murmuring a polite "your grace" before leading the way to my new chambers. Her curled black hair hung down her back, hiding the sigil that was indented there in her armour - between her shoulder blades - and I could not quite glimpse at what indented there despite all that I tried. As we walked in careful silence, I observed Lady Dacey while I had the chance, all the while wondering how to start a conversation with the woman. Sighing inwardly at the awkwardness I was feeling, I decided to just say the first thing that came to mind and hoped that something came out of whatever nonsense it would be.
"I have not seen many women dressed like soldiers." I spoke, carefully. Lady Dacey glanced briefly over her shoulder at me and in the flicker of the flame from the torches on the wall, I saw the faintest of smirks on her face. The corridors we walked down were much like those at the Twins, I could not help but think. People we passed by would ogle at my presence, their eyes burning into me as they took me in. I could imagine it did not take much intelligence to work out who I was and I found that I did not like the awkward mutterings and bowing whenever we walked by. I tried to ignore them as best I could, keeping my attention on the woman that escorted me, despite the awkward air that sat between us.
"You haven't, your grace?" She was humouring me, I could tell. Though the woman had acted polite enough, I could not help but detect a hint of tension in the air between us. How could I expect anything less? I was a stranger after all and Lady Dacey appeared to be a very cautious woman.
"Only you and Lady Brienne." I replied, honestly. Lady Dacey hummed under her breath, nodding absently. When the silence threatened to continue, I quickly began speaking again, hoping that somewhere along the way, some awkwardness would ease away. "Did you fight in the war?"
"Aye, I did, your grace." The woman was blunt and to the point, and after a brief hesitation, I quickly added;
"Alongside the King, I'm guessing?" Of course she did, you fool - I thought to myself, feeling the essence of rambling coming out. This was the time to be brave though, I told myself. I had never been one to fear things back at home so there was no need to start such in Winterfell with these people. Perhaps it would help the transition too? I could only hope so.
"Aye. I fought in every battle with the King." At this, I raised my eyebrow, a little shocked and certainly impressed by such declaration. Lady Dacey caught my expression and smirked once more. "My mother and myself were two of the few women that joined King Robb in the war. When you meet her, your grace, you will be adding a third to your list of women soldiers, I daresay." I felt my brow raise further.
"That's certainly remarkable." I murmured, though said no more. Silence passed between us and neither of us said anything again until we reached my chambers.
Lady Dacey entered the room first, holding the door aside so I could enter after her. I could feel my stomach twist at the reminder that this was not my room but rather my shared room, though I forced a smile when I felt Lady Dacey studying the side of my head. I eyed the room with an ounce of contemplation, noting quickly that the chambers were much larger than my old one back in the Twins and how the large bed to the right of the door was certainly uninviting. There were an amble amount of furs layered on top of the bedding and the chill that swept through to my bones was a big enough hint as to why there were so many. I could hear the distant chatter from life on the ground below, coming in through the windows in the room - there were two and they were much larger than my single one back in the Twins. An unlit fire took up a large space of the wall and a skinned rug was laid before it, as well as a set of table and chairs placed nearby. A battered old tin bath sat in the corner of the room and I frowned when I noticed the absence of a dressing screen, realising that I would have to bathe now on show of my husband - which was not a particularly pleasant thought at all.
While the room looked nice enough, I felt no warmth for it and knew it was because it was not home. Feigning approval, I nodded at Lady Dacey and grimaced openly when she bowed. When the woman's face twisted with confusion, I realised she had caught my displeasure.
"Do you need anything, your grace?" Lady Dacey asked with sickly-sweet politeness and I found that I hated each word that came from her mouth.
"Can you fetch Esma, my handmaid, for me and my belongings?" I asked, tiredly running a hand over my face as I stepped further into the room. I could sense the woman's hesitation and quickly added a; "Thank you, my lady" hoping that the woman would just leave me in peace. When the door closed softly behind her, a large sigh escaped my lips and the feeling of emptiness washed over me.
This isn't home, this isn't home, this isn't home, this isn't home-
Chanting in my head, followed by over-whelming sadness and loneliness. In the silence, I thought of my actual home, of the Twins which lay so far away from here. I thought of Shirei, wondering what she would make of Winterfell if she was here - would she like it, love it? I thought of Waldra, how would she have reacted to the sight of this place too? Were they happy, I wondered? Did they miss me as much as I missed them? Shirei must have been sent to Raventree Hall, I realised, and knew that I had to write a letter to the girl as soon as possible. I could not imagine what she must have been feeling - after a thought though, I realised that given my current situation, I probably did - and wished with every possible part of me, that I could be at her side again. I longed to comfort her, to hold her hand and promise her it would be alright. I wanted her to tell me it would be alright too. I needed someone right now to tell me it would be alright. All I wished to do right now was leave, steal a horse and ride all the way back to the Twins - hopefully without too many injuries, given that I could not ride a horse that well. I longed to be anywhere else but here; with my sisters once more. I had to be strong though, I told myself quickly. I needed to keep my chin up and battle through the difficult times. I had known full well that this would not be easy and it was not going to if I did not try. Right now though, the idea of fighting to keep the strength was the last thing I wanted. Right now, all I wanted to do was lie down and rest, or maybe write to my sisters to attempt to rid the grief I was feeling without them.
When Esma came into the room, under Lady Dacey's escort, my mind was made up. Without unpacking or resting - even though Esma urged me to do at least one of them - I set about writing letters to both Waldra and Shirei; out-lining my journey and describing Winterfell, in a hope that writing to them would ease some of the sadness I was feeling.
I made sure to leave out the emptiness I felt in leaving, knowing that neither needed to know that, though did not over-bear my writing with too much good-will about it all. As well as that, I made sure to declare my love for them both and hopes of their good health. I asked Shirei to tell me everything about Raventree Hall, about the Blackwoods and more importantly her betrothed. I urged my youngest sister not to leave any details aside, as I had done, even if they were unpleasant, as I wanted to know everything. While I was unsure what I could do to help Shirei if things did turn out to be bad, I wanted to know regardless. I made sure to write about all the beautiful sights I had seen on my journey, knowing that would certainly peek the girl's interest, as well as offering that Winterfell seemed as grand as it sounded in the books she read.
In my letter to Waldra, I asked how home was and all that had occurred in my absence, enquiring about our sisters and even about Father - if only to entertain appearances. I asked what the older woman had done in my absence and whether she was keeping out of trouble - given that it was Waldra, I sincerely doubted that. Briefly, I debated whether to ask about Ser Quentyn, though left him out in the end - I did not need his vulgar self to spoil the first contact I had had with my oldest sister in weeks.
When I re-read them both, I found that my own words comforted me a little, even if some of it sounded empty to me. It comforted me to know that Shirei and Waldra would read them, hopefully happy to hear of my well-being and safe passage to Winterfell, and it comforted me also to finally get the chance to communicate with them again, even if I was sparing some particular details.
"Are those for Ladies Shirei and Waldra?" Esma asked, once I had finished and folded each letter in half. I laid both of them on the flat of the table, pushing myself back out the chair I had been seated in, feeling the need to walk away from them in fear of tearing up. Absently, I nodded. "None for your other sisters?" I sent her a blank look and the woman said no more on the matter. "This place is certainly not what I had expected."
"What did you expect?" I asked, gingerly sitting down on the edge of the bed as my handmaid set about lighting the fire. Eyeing the room around me, I realised the woman had unpacked for me while I had been writing my letters. "I don't think I have had much time to take everything in. It seems quite like a dream at the moment." A dream or a night scare, I wondered.
"No, everything was quite rushed when we arrived." Esma agreed, nodding. At that, I thought of the King and his quick departure, finding a bitter frown twitching at my lips at the thought. "Perhaps things will be different after tonight? After the welcome feast?" I scoffed, shaking my head at the thought. I could not have imagined anything worse than attending such a celebration, though I knew it was inevitable now. Turning to look over my shoulder, I eyed the darkening sky out the nearest window and knew that it would only be a matter of time now before the feast would begin and I would be displayed for all to see. Such a charming notion, I thought.
"Everything already is different, Esma." I muttered, running a hand through my ragged hair. "Our lives are different now, the world around us is different." After the woman finished with the fire, she turned her attention to the single bath in the corner and when I noticed the deep frown on her face, I could imagine her thoughts were on the lack of dressing screen.
"I guess that is to be expected at first." She offered. "I am sure we will grow used to it here, in time."
"I know, I just-" Sighing, I trailed off, unsure what else to say. After a long time, I heard myself say, dejected; "I feel different." Instantly, Esma's eyes swung towards me, concern in her gaze.
"You hardly are pleased with the situation you are in and no one can blame you - you have been taken away from your family and home." She quickly said, sounding strangely furious and concerned all at once. "I guess the best course of action now is not to dwell too much on the negatives and consider things in a more positive light. You are Queen - you have people who are counting on you-"
"People I did not have counting on me two months ago." I cut in quickly and Esma offered me a tight smile.
"No, but they are now and that is all that matters. You have the strength, you just lack the motivation at the moment. I know it is hard, but you are not alone. You have me, you have Lady Catelyn and also the King himself; do not forget that." I grimaced at the mention of that man and Esma sent me a stern look that looked to be scolding, before continuing. "He is your husband, remember that." How could I forget? "You just have to remain strong, remain positive and do not let them break you. All the time I have known you, Ella, you have not broken under all the strain you have gone through and I do not wish to see such a thing happen now. It won't happen now." I eyed the older woman, noting the ferocity behind her gaze and found myself smiling slightly after taking in her words. She meant to comfort me and though I still felt hallowed by all that was going on, her presence made me perk up a little, reminding me that I perhaps was not so alone in this.
"You called me 'Ella'." I murmured after the longest of silences and Esma's eyes widened in shock by the revelation. She opened her mouth then, no doubt to apologise but I quickly cut her off. "Thank you; it's nice to hear someone call me something that isn't so formal." Even though my husband called me "Miriella" it still sounded much too formal to my ears - though the thought of the man calling me "Ella" too almost made me grimace. I certainly was not ready for that just yet.
Esma replied with a sincere smile and said no more on the matter, a silent understanding passing between us. Instead, she eyed the bath in the corner once more, still not hiding her frown of displeasure at the clear sight of it, and instructed - a little reluctantly - that I should bathe before the feast. I did not argue.
The consequences for not having a dressing screen unfortunately came into affect during my time in the bath.
As I went about bathing absently at my own leisure, Esma sorting through my dresses in the corner in an attempt to find the one most suitable for the evening's celebration, I heard the sounds of voices approaching the room. During my bathe already, I had found it quite unnerving how I could view the room fully from my lounged position in the water, wishing that I had the usual aid of a screen to block everything from view. Even in my room back at the Twins, I had not liked bathing so openly, regardless of the fact I did not share my chambers with anyone back then. The sounds of the footsteps now though, immediately made me tense and I gripped the sides of the tin tub, ready to reach for the cloth as Esma quickly froze too at the approach. Before either of us could do anything though, the door to the chambers opened and the figure of my husband entered.
Thankfully Robb was alone, shutting the door behind him and prohibiting any one else to join us in the suddenly crowded chambers. His gaze swung around the room, smiling politely towards Esma, before turning to me in the bath in the corner. Though I had kept myself body hidden from my shoulders down - keeping my body dunked under the water - I could still see the hint of red creep onto the man's cheeks. Quickly my husband turned away at the sight of me, opting to study the lit flicker of the fireplace.
"I do apologise, Miriella, for barging in at such a time." He offered, a little too quickly, and only succeeded in making the situation more awkward. I almost quirked that he had seen me like this already, on our wedding night, before recalling that he indeed had not; having allowing me to keep my nightgown throughout the consummation.
"It's fine, your grace." I replied, tightly. Esma quickly resumed her previous activities, making sure to keep her back to us as she worked now, only increasing my discomfort further. "Was your council meeting informative?" Robb's jaw tightened suddenly at that, peeking my curiosity.
"It was." The man replied, narrowing his gaze as he stared into the fire, and said no more. At his reaction, I frowned, taking his figure in for a moment with wonder.
"Will you tell me what was discussed?" Robb turned to me then, his expression in complete shock at my question, and I knew without him needing to say it, that the man was wondering why I would have any business knowing such details. I was thankful though, after a few moments, that it dawned on the man that I did have the right to know such details, given I was now Queen. His expression faltered from shock to uncertainty quite rapidly.
"Perhaps at dinner." While the answer was not quite what I wanted, I knew it was better than nothing and nodded once. Robb's eyes were averted quickly then, the blush still on his cheeks as he frowned. I sighed then, scrubbing absently at my skin as I spoke again.
"Would it be alright to request a dressing screen, your grace? Only, I feel my open nudity in occasions like this will become a problem to you if I do not get any privacy." Robb spared a withering glance in my direction, confirming my words, and I was grateful when he nodded.
"Of course, I will see about sorting that out for you." Robb assured me, again his eyes flitting about in every direction imaginable apart from where I bathed. Smiling to myself, I knew I could be happy for this comfort. At least I would not have to continue bathing now in open view of the room. When my husband's eyes suddenly passed towards the table though, pausing briefly upon what sat on the top, I felt my feeling of slight happiness turn into uncertainty once more. Robb walked over with careful footsteps, his hands picking up the two letters that I had left there with an equal amount of caution. Almost abandoning his previous unease, my husband's gaze swung to directly meet mine. "You've written to your sisters?"
"Yes." I nodded, slowly, not sure what to make of his expression. It almost seemed like pity crossed his features then, perhaps a hint of pain too. When Robb turned back to look at the letters in his hand, my own hands went to grip the edges of the tub again, ready to jump out and rip the letters from him should he do anything. For a moment, I imagined him ripping them up right in front of me and throwing them into the fire. The thought alone had me most raising from the tub and was thankful that he did no move to do so. Instead, he continued to stare down at the paper, his fingers clutching them so delicately that it intrigued me to see Robb handle my letters in such a way. After a tense moment, my husband finally spoke and his words were certainly unexpected.
"Would you like me to go and send them for you now?"
I knew my eyes instantly widened at his suggestion and I made no attempts to hide the shock on my face when Robb looked my way in question. Startled, I wondered if perhaps I had heard things and continued frowning up at the man, not sure what to say. Wordlessly, a small smile flitted onto the King's face, one that did not quite reach his eyes but seemed genuine all the same. He carefully clutched my letters between his palms, smoothly running his hands across the parchment, and offered a quirk of his eyebrow to prompt an answer from me.
"Um I-" I breathed, still astounded. "Please, that would be very kind. Thank you." Robb nodded once, placing the letters back down on the table so he could shrug off his coat and unclip his armour - which Esma quickly helped him with - before taking both letters back in his hands again and heading towards the door.
"I will see about getting a screen for you too while I can." I went to say it was no trouble now, given that I was nearly finished, though Robb continued, regardless. "That will give you enough privacy in my absence to finish your bathing now and dress without feeling uncomfortable." I nodded my thanks once more and with one last honest smile, my husband was gone, clad with my letters and the intention of a dressing screen.
I stared after him, unsure what to make of his kindness given all the awkward encounters I had endured with him throughout the many weeks travelling, though was glad to see such a side of him. Perhaps maybe being at Winterfell truly would make things easy for the two of us, or at least ease Robb's uncertainty. Whatever the reason, I was glad that steps were being made and as long as they continued down this path, I did not mind how long the journey would take. The shift of movement caught my attention and I turned to eye Esma, who looked equally as shocked as I felt. The woman smiled back at me, saying no words on the matter but her expression telling me enough. Wordlessly, she came towards me, picking up the cloth on the floor and holding it out in her arms towards me.
"Come on, let's make you presentable for the people of Winterfell."
The welcome feast in Winterfell was not unlike the celebrations that I had attended back in the Twins - of course, I was not Queen back then or dining alongside Robb Stark, though the general atmosphere and people were very much the same.
After dressing and waiting for Robb, the pair of us were instructed to head down to the Great Hall where our presences were expected. As we approached, I heard the echoing sounds of a large gathering of voices and visibly grimaced when I heard someone announce our arrival. I held onto the crook of Robb's arm, hoping to remain grounded and allowed the man to lead the way inside and through the roaring crowds. Some bowed, some clapped though most cheered. My husband laughed at the display while I could only manage the barest of smiles to remain polite. The room itself was large enough - it had to be to house the number that gathered around us now - and we made our way up to what looked to be the top table, where two seats in the middle were left open. Robb's council men sat on one side while the Stark family were sat on the other. There were a couple of seats spare on the ends of the table - the one on the Stark side, I gathered, was left spare for Bran Stark and his hopeful return - though I was unsure why there was also another spare on the council men's side. I did not dwell on matters for very long though as soon we had taken our seats and the feast had began.
I was glad to be seated between the King and his mother rather than beside Brynden Tully - I had no qualms with the man, but I infinitely preferred the comfort of Lady Stark's company than that of a stranger, no matter how nice he may have been. Robb seemed happy enough to be seated nearer his men though and did not waste any time in starting conversations with them, soon Lord Umber's booming laughter filling quite a proportional space amongst the noise. Lady Stark offered amble conversation with me throughout the meal, though I knew my responses were not the best I could offer in return. I picked and pushed around my food, not feeling at all hungry and already tired by the celebrations. Around us, people were laughing and drinking and after the food had all been eaten, music began to play and people began to dance. The idea of dancing was probably the last thing I wanted to do that evening so I watched the people of Winterfell enjoy themselves in my - our - name.
After so long, and after Lady Catelyn had given up speaking with me, I found myself sitting quite silently with a goblet of wine in my grasp. I observed everyone around me with careful observation, careful not to show too much discomfort and forced a smile on my face when I could. Beside me, Robb was still speaking happily enough with his men while Lady Stark was talking in quiet tones to her daughter on my other side. Arya appeared to be complaining and when I listened in closer, I realised Lady Catelyn was suggesting that Arya go and sit with the other children in the Hall and try and enjoy herself, perhaps dance a little with a few of the boys. Arya was having none of it and I had to smile slightly as I heard the girl's stubborn tone, reminded much of my own but also my sister's. After a while, Lady Stark gave up her badgering, in favour of seeing Rickon to bed, and she excused the pair of them, assuring me that she would return soon enough. When she was gone, I saw the grumpy pout on the Stark girl's lip and found myself smiling further.
"What?" Arya demanded when she saw my expression and directed gaze. I was not feigned by her harsh tone and instead leaned over her mother's vacant chair towards her.
"I hate these sort of things as well." I told her, quietly so Robb could not hear me. Ignoring her surprise, I noted quickly that Arya was dressed in a dark red gown, a complete parallel to the breeches and rougher look she was donning before. Looking down, I eyed the green gown Esma had made me wear too and smiled at the girl again. "I also hate dresses too."
"Mother made me put one on." Arya muttered, crossing her arms across her chest and succeeding in looking even more grumpy. "She said I had to look like a lady for you and Robb. She wanted me to wear a dress before but I told her if she made me put it on, then I would just go and jump in a giant puddle of mud and ruin in before you got here." I breathed a chuckle at that, shaking my head and realising that that was probably something Waldra would do too, when she was younger.
"I like your bargaining tactics." I nodded, appreciating the girl's stubbornness and independence of character. While I did not know young Arya Stark yet, I could imagine I would grow very used to her company given enough time here. Her likeness to Waldra was certainly refreshing. "I am very glad that I won't be the only woman around here who isn't wearing a dress all the time. My older sister and I always thought gowns were quite restricting and that the skirts always got in the way. We never really saw much practicality with the things." Turning back to Arya, I saw the young girl studying me strangely. Her expression was not unkind, rather confused and uncertain. In question, I raised an eyebrow. "Is there something wrong?"
"You're-" Arya began, trailing off before shaking her head and shrugging. After that, the girl opted to say no more to me and quickly excused herself soon after that, to head to bed. I did not let her dismissal bother me as I was aware these things would take time - I was glad to have had those few seconds talking to the girl anyway; it was a start, at least.
"I guess you do not wish to dance, Miriella?" A voice pulled me from my musings and I turned to the side to take in my husband. His council men still sat on his other side, though weren't requiring his attention for the moment apparently. Robb's expression was polite enough and I shrugged in answer to his question, hoping he wasn't going to lead on to asking me to dance himself. The thought alone terrified me - the fact that the man had willingly spoken to me was enough shock for one night.
"Do people expect me to?" I queried, hesitantly, and Robb shrugged as well.
"I don't think they will mind either way. At the moment, men will be wary of asking you themselves, though given enough time and they'll be queuing for your hand to dance." The smirk my husband finished with seemed to conclude that the man was indeed jesting with me and I found myself quite baffled by him doing so. After taking in that familiar wine-replenished haze in his gaze though, I knew why the man was acting as such and let out a brief scoff of disbelief. It seemed the allude of alcohol aided in the tension between my husband and I, even if it was only for a short while and more likely false. I could take advantage of this, I reasoned - it would make things easier for me, at least, even if the King was too drunk to remember the conversation.
"And will you be queuing with them, your grace?" I braved jesting back, glad that he didn't back down from my comment even though his expression did twitch slightly with uncertainty.
"I suppose I would have to; to save you from some unwanted attention, at least."
"Maybe I want the attention." Robb sent me a look that told me that I wasn't kidding anyone with my statement. It felt strange to see that Robb knew me well, even if it was only slightly. Perhaps he was not as drunk as I thought? He was not entirely sober, that was for sure, otherwise the man would continue to ignore me. "And how come there aren't ladies queuing for you, your grace? Surely they cannot be wary of you?" The King shook his head.
"Perhaps I just don't wish to dance." There was tension in his expression, his jaw clenched as he turned away to stare forward. I knew that he was over-thinking things, as he always did, rather than letting things flow as he was previously just doing. With a frustrated sigh, I knew Robb's over-thinking would be a bane in this marriage, despite it only just beginning.
"Not even with me?" I asked, hoping to reel the man's friendliness back in. To attempt to help, I quickly refilled the man's goblet of wine and made a point of pushing the cup towards him. Robb smiled slightly at my hint and obliged in taking a sip, even though his brow was still burrowed with concern from his inward musings. He cheeks glowed with the warm of alcohol that swilled inside of him and I hoped that the taste of more would loosen the man's tongue.
"Was that a proposition?" He returned, sipping at his wine again and eyeing me over the rim. That thought of dancing made me grimace and I shook my head far too quickly, wincing when a wave of sickness washed over me.
"Certainly not." My partner smirked, chuckling deeply into his goblet, and allowing silence to fall over us. It was surprisingly not awkward, I found, and I gathered the haze of alcohol between us would aid in the future to help ease the tension. My own head was still swimming slightly and I took a large gulp of my own in a bid to spin my thoughts further. I did not want to think about home, or my sisters, or my loneliness and my want to leave this place and people. I just wanted to forget for a while and hopefully entertain some normality, even if it meant forcing conversation with my normally cautious husband.
"I sought you out a dressing screen." Robb offered after a while and I turned back from my observing of some drunken dancers to look at my husband. "It was my sister, Sansa's, though Mother said you're more than welcome to use it." At the sentiment, I felt a strange warmth fill my chest. "It should be in our chambers now for you to use."
"Thank you." I replied, smiling warmly at the man. After receiving a nod in response, I quickly considered what to ask my husband in return. "So, will you tell me what was discussed at your meeting with your council now?" At this, I saw Robb's demeanour change quite rapidly, from relative ease back to his usual tension. He ran a hand over his stubbled jaw as he thought and after a while, I did not believe he was going to answer me until he finally leaned towards me to speak.
"We discussed quite a great deal; there were a lot of concerning matters to attend to during my month away from the throne." He began, slowly. "The reconstruction of Winterfell was an important matter, as well as the progress of the wounded we have kept here; these are issues I believe you will have to aid with once you settle." I nodded at that, feeling strange at the mention of my induction and wary of what I had to do, though said nothing of it. "Do not fear though, you will have others to help and guide you. My mother and the council will be by your side throughout-"
"And you will be there too." I quickly forced out, frowning at the man. Surely he did not mean to leave me alone during all these duties? After a brief panic, Robb smiled towards me, assuring, before nodding - much to my utter relief.
"Of course." He agreed before exhaling deeply. I held my breath then, sensing the but. "But I won't be here all the time - there's another matter we discussed during our meeting that means I have to leave Winterfell for a short while." He won't be here?
"Where are you going?" I asked, still frowning with confusion. Again, Robb hesitated, seemingly unsure how to approach the next answer. I waited patiently, glad to finally be provided some knowledge from the man, but not sure I completely liked what I was hearing. As unreadable and dismissive as the man could be, there was no way I could imagine trying to complete my duties without him. Gods, I was not sure I even could.
"Further North." A pause. "Up to the Wall actually." The Wall?
"Why?"
"Do you know about my brother, Jon?" I nodded - Lady Stark had told me enough about the man, though I knew full well of her distaste for this Jon Snow and was not sure how much of her hatred seeped through her interjects about him. While I may not have completely condoned Lady Catelyn's hatred, I could understand to some degree why she dismissed him - bastard children were perhaps not as common amongst Starks as as they were amongst us Freys.
"Only a little." I offered, hoping that Robb would enlighten me further about the man, Jon Snow - or more than Lady Stark could at least.
"Well, he's a little younger than I am - though only by a few months. A shy boy, a little awkward with social situations but his heart's in the right place." I heard fondness in Robb's tones as he spoke about his brother and I was glad to hear such a change, given the usual harsh tone from Lady Catelyn. "He's not my true brother, of course; we share the same father but have different mothers. I didn't really think it made much of a difference though between the pair of us and the rest of my siblings." I smiled at that, glad to hear Robb's views on it. His fond expression reversed quite quickly though and all too sudden, he turned serious once more. "He joined the Night's Watch only a short time before the war broke out, choosing to take the Black in an attempt to make our father proud." This much I knew already. "Throughout the war though, he grew through the ranks and is now Commander of the Night's Watch." This I did not know. "I'm travelling further North to speak with him."
"Are there issues with the Wall?" I probed and Robb smirked slightly.
"There are always issues with the Wall." He muttered, shaking his head. Quickly, a thought came to mind.
"Is it Bran?" Robb looked thoroughly surprised by the mention of his brother and I quickly added; "Your mother told me about him" to rid his confusion.
"Oh, well, no it isn't." He shook his head. "This is in regards to the wildlings unfortunately, not Bran - though that will certainly be something I will be speaking with Jon about when I see him." Robb sighed once more, almost like there was heavy weight upon his shoulders. "Recently, there have been frequent attacks from them against the Wall and while most have been unsuccessful, they're growing stronger. There are more men in the Night's Watch now since the war ended and I make sure to send more when I can to aid, though Jon has urged that I travel to meet him to discuss everything with him." A pause. "The King-Over-the-Wall, Mance Rayder, has requested a meeting between the Commander of the Night's Watch and the King in the North - Jon and I - to discuss the request of him bringing his people South of the Wall for the Winter."
While I did not know much about the wildlings - Shirei was much more inept with the history and knowledge of the Kingdoms, given all the books she read - I knew more than enough to be aware of their savagery and brutal history. I did not hide my uncertain frown at Robb's words.
"And will you let him?" I asked hesitantly. In response, Robb sighed, running a hand through his hair.
"I haven't decided yet." He sighed. "Like I said, they're becoming quite restless with their attacks against the Wall and Jon's unsure how much longer they will be able to keep the wildlings at bay. I suppose with this compromise, we can set some terms for them and attempt to keep them manageable?"
"But you are also granting them access through the barrier of the Wall and allowing them into our lands." I reminded him, gently. "What if they become savage? What if they launch an attack on us once they are free of the Wall?" Robb frowned thoughtfully.
"They'll attack if we don't let them through anyway and I cannot imagine they will be very lenient with us then."
"No, I suppose not." I agreed, quietly. The whole idea was certainly terrifying, I had to admit. Taking in the tension on Robb's face - something I was used to, though I knew the current unease was for a completely different reason to normal - I quickly continued speaking, hoping to provide whatever council I could for the man. I was supposed to be his Queen, after all, and I could try at least. Even if I was no help at all to him. "Are there not any more men to spare to guard the Wall, to help keep them away?"
"Jon tells me that their numbers are quite extensive; most certainly out-numbering those who are on the Night's Watch already." He muttered, rubbing his chin thoughtfully. "He tells me that Mance Rayder seems quite a reasonable man in some respects - more than most wildlings, anyway. Perhaps they are not all quite as savage as the stories make them out to be? Osha was once a wildling before she was brought to Winterfell." I recalled the name, racing through my memory before coming across the sight of the crazed woman in the courtyard; the one Lady Stark had left to speak with.
"You let her in?"
"Well, no." Robb shook his head, shifting a little. "She and some others attempted to take Bran hostage, though I arrived before they could and killed them all. Apart from Osha, of course." He frowned and I found it strange that he spoke so easily of people he had killed. He had killed many, no doubt, during the war. "We brought her back here for questioning and she eventually became a servant here after displaying good behaviour." My husband sipped the last of his wine absently, declining my offering of another refill of his goblet. "During the Greyjoy siege of Winterfell in the war, she helped Bran and Rickon escape and kept them safe for a while. After Bran decided to go further over the Wall, he instructed for Osha to take Rickon to House Umber's Keep and become his guardian. She's proved her worth to our family many times during the war, despite being a wildling."
"They may not all be like Osha." I added, carefully, and Robb sighed.
"Aye. I know." He nodded. After a pause though, he forced a smile and shrugged, absently. "Do not worry about that though, my council and I will discuss the issue thoroughly before we make a conclusive decision. Even then, I still need to speak to Jon too and when an answer is given, we will be prepared for whatever the repercussion." I nodded in response, unsure I could accept his attempts of brushing the matter aside.
"When do you leave?" I asked, slowly.
"I haven't decided yet." Was the reply as he leaned back in his chair. "I will tell you when a date has been set though and I can assure you, you will be safe in my absence."
Before I could urge a response though, a loud scrapping caught my attention, as well as an equally loud holler. Looking over the top of Robb's head, I saw Greatjon Umber risen from his chair with his goblet in his hand. The man swayed slightly as he stood and had to grasp hold of the back of his chair to keep himself steady. Around us, the room fell silent and some men laughed at Lord Umber's open display of drunkenness, despite most being in an equally similar state themselves.
"Gentlemen!" Lord Umber cried, before adding with a grin; "Ladies!" There were some hoots and chuckles at that. "It seems that though we are celebrating quite intently, we have not been very mindful of the new company we keep." I frowned a little at that, not sure I liked where this was going. Robb turned to me at that, smirking a very knowing smirk. "We have not given our new Queen a proper welcome to Winterfell yet!" I felt the eyes turn to me and I forced a smile when Lord Umber looked my way, drowning out the whistles and calls in the background. "Young Miriella - a woman surprisingly quite lovely for a Frey girl!" More laughter followed that and I frowned at that, wondering if I should be offended or not. "We welcome you humbly into our arms and are blessed that our good King Robb has chosen you to be his bride and Queen. May you live a long and happy life - made better in our company, right, gentleman?!" More calls, chuckles and whistles, before Lord Umber leaned over Lord Brynden to pat Robb's shoulder heavily. "You could not have asked for a better husband in Robb Stark, my Queen, and I can assure you that you will be happy by his side." The sentiment touched a soft spot in me and I could not help but turn to Robb then, taken back by Lord Umber's declarations but knew the alcohol influenced his dramatics quite immensely.
"Thank you, Lord Umber." My husband nodded and though his jaw was clenched and expression tense - he was probably over-thinking it all again - he looked quite pleased enough with the larger man's short speech. The man they called Greatjon, in return sent his King an unbashful grin before turning back to the crowd before him.
"I bid you all to raise your goblets in a toast to them now!" Some people rose from their seats, goblets in hand, and for a moment, the spectacle took me by surprise. The scene before me was quite over-whelming and I was unsure how to react to such dedication. These people did not even know me and yet they without hesitation raised their goblets for me. Beside me, Robb shifted higher in his chair, sitting up straighter and donning a prouder expression on his face. "To Robb and his new wife; Queen Miriella! The King and Queen in the North!"
"The King and Queen in the North!"
~Edited February 2015~