Date of Update: June 4, 2017

A/N: Thank you for stopping by! ~ Please read and review :

Chapter 10

The Pavilion

The moon was but a sliver of silver in the sky, suffocated by the dark ominous clouds which seemed to go on forever. Keiki suppressed the building up of nausea in his throat. The stench of blood was so thick in the air that he cringed from the mere whiff of it.

Why do you have to do this by yourself? Am I so unreliable?

He thought he had passed out again in the mountains the very moment dead bodies of villagers greeted them at the entrance. Blood had been spilt that night but the smell was not as pungent as he knew - for an innocent's blood had no malice in it.

But now it has. An accursed blood.

He heard the clash of metals from below as he rode on Hyouki's back. Sparks flew as swords met and connected with another, drawing blood as they landed on their prey.

He saw a red-haired woman bleeding from an injured shoulder. A man was holding her cruelly by the hair. The man slapped her hard across the face, sending her to the ground.

For the first time in his life, Keiki saw red.

The hand around a fine stylus tightened as the stoic man recalled the events which almost took away the life of his Empress.

He dropped the pen and rubbed his temples exasperatedly. It was the third night since that incident. But he was not doing any better.

When he slept, he would dream about how helpless his empress was, sore and bleeding and was at the door of death. He would reach out to her, only to be awakened by his own pleas for her to hold on and never let go. But she never made it. She died in his arms. And he was there, blaming himself for letting her die over and over again.

He was not going to fall asleep and have the dream recur. To be honest, he was at his wit's end.

No matter how hard he fought to stay by her side, she always manages to drift away.

Why did it always seem that they were close yet so distant from each other?

As if they were merely dancing around but never touching.

She confided in him but most of those, if not all, were all about running the Kingdom. What about her personal feelings, her hopes and dreams? He knew there were more to those emerald eyes, in contrast to the independence and strength she exuded in the court and in the battlefield.

What were those other things she thought about?

He wanted to know them. But he knew well enough that he was not the type of person to open up to.

When he tried to compliment her, he always stumbled on his words as if he was lecturing her instead. When he tried to remind her of something, it always ended up as if he was scolding her for forgeting something she never should have.

He admits that he was worried about her ability to rule. Yet she always manages to surprise him with her resolve, every now and then. He could not ask for another ruler in her place.

He drew a breath and closed his eyes.

He knew in his heart there was something else that he wanted to express for a while now. And it was because of this very reason that he built his walls so high that they were impregnable from anyone - even for her.

But it was her who shook them so hard they had eventually started to fall off, piece by piece.

And if the walls broke down - what would be the price to pay?

He sighed and took another stylus in his hand. He smoothened the edges of a parchment and wrote deftly:

Happy 6th anniversary, Sekishi.

.

.

Meet me at the Willow Pavilion. Do not be late.

Signed, Keiki

Youko lifted the hems of her flowing robes as she hastily stode out of the royal court once the assembly had ended. That kirin! He did not even join the discussions this morning. In fact, he was nowehere to be found. Youko had to endure the relentless battle for dominance by her courtiers, with the scolding glares given to her as she told them about the incident at the mountains. But it was over now and she was glad to have escaped alive.

Now, Keiki. She remembered that he had returned to his cold demeanor towards her. He was perhaps still angry at her?

Well, she would not know the truth if she only relied on his behavioral patterns. She was no psychiatrist, she knew very well. But her senses were keen. It was rare for her to catch a glimpse of him these days. Did he avoid her on purpose?

But she could not help feeling a twinge in her heart. That she felt sad how he was not even there to scold her. Guess she missed that part of him as well.

Maybe he grew tired of her for being so stubborn and brash?

What should I have done, Keiki?

She slowed down the moment she realized that a few steps more would take her to the Willow Pavilion. Her heart was beating too fast but she was not sure if it was because she had been walking too fast or because of something completely different.

Her breath hitched as she caught a glimpse of translucent golden hair belonging to a man who was facing the Sea of Clouds, oblivious to her arrival.

She breathed deeply, inhaling the scent of a mixture of grass, jasmine and something else familiar yet vague to her.

"Shujou, I have been waiting for you." The man whom she called Keiki ever since, have now turned his attention to her.

"Ah... Yes," Youko quickened her strides and sat on the chair he prepared. Avoiding eye contact, Youko lowered her head and focused on the hands on her lap instead.

Keiki began to pour sweet-smelling tea on a porcelain cup then offered it to her.

He had been uncannily quiet all this time.

"You have been avoiding me," Youko sighed, finally looking up to meet his eyes.

She braced herself for the cold, piercing eyes which shook her on that blood-tainted night.

His eyes were the same violet orbs yet were inscribed with an unwritten color of emotion she had not seen before.

Have I disappointed you again, Keiki?

"Keiki, I... "

"I have no other words to say to you, Shujou." Like a whiplash, Keiki began even before Youko finished her sentence, "But you have once again forgotten the vital role you have in this kingdom."

Replacing the cup to its saucer, she fixed herself for the stinging words. She will just have to endure it, she thought.

"How many times do I have to remind you? That you are the empress! Are you just going to throw away the life so many depend upon? Are you trying so hard to become a hero when do not even have to!"

"I get it. I get it!" Youko retorted, losing her composure, "All I ever have to do is wear the crown and let people be killed for this kingdom, right?"

"Yes! Because you almost died out there!" Keiki clenched his fists, "What if I have not arrived on time? What did you think I felt when I saw you get slashed around so helplessly with the imperceptible hope that you would still live?"

Stunned, Youko froze in her seat.

"Or do you want for me to beg you on my knees just so you would stop risking your life too often? Stop being so selfish!"

After all this time he worried her, Youko could not understand why she was being hurt by his words alone.

"You are correct, I am!" Youko finally stood up, her emotions getting the better of her, "I am nothing but a child this kingdom finds so lacking as a ruler. Am I such a disappointment to you, Keiki? Should I depose myself so you can find another one?"

She had no wound but her chest was so painful, she found it difficult to breath. Did she not matter to him all this time? But she was not going to cry, not now.

Keiki was taken aback by her words.

"Shujou..."

A hand reached for her arm but she shrugged it away.

"I will take my leave now." Youko gripped the hems of her dress and started for the bridge when she was pulled back into a hard surface.

Her eyes widened at the impact, and by the fact that they were so close to each other now. She was still seething from the words he said but was overcame the moment she heard him speak.

"Please do not leave," Keiki spoke quietly, his chin resting on her head, "I... "

The poignancy in his voice contained more pain than what was bursting her bubble.

She lifted her eyes and met his gaze.

His eyes that were clear as polished amethysts were now tainted by pain and sadness.

"I was angry," Keiki lowered his eyes as he gently held Youko by the shoulders, "That you left on your own. That you had to prioritize my safety before your own."

And that you have been hurt. And I was not even there to prevent it.

"To me, your life is the most important one." I am the selfish one.

"I messed up yet again," Keiki sighed and closed his eyes. "I am sorry, Shujou. I am nowhere expected of a kirin to his Empress."

Anger dissolving, Youko touched his hand, "I understand. I apologize for being angry as well, and for rushing out like that without thinking. Forgive me."

"I am bad with words," Keiki admitted defeatedly.

"But your embrace was soothing enough," Youko laughed quietly, "I thought I will never see the day I get to receive a hug from the Kei Taiho."

As if he only realized it, Keiki burst into a shade of red.

"Um..." Keiki covered his mouth with the back of his hand, his eyes turned away, still obviously flustered.

The same one who kissed me so nonchalantly can be this flustered?

She slapped herself mentally. How she wished those thoughts would just leave her alone.

"So I guess we're okay now," Youko spoke with a smile, "Don't be so hard on yourself. I know it's hard to talk but we have eternity to figure that out for ourselves. I'll do my best to stay on the Way."

Youko thought she saw a sign of relief on the Taiho's face.

"You still have duties as governor of Ei Province, right?" The red haired woman tapped her kirin playfully on the shoulder, "Then you should be on your way. You don't have to worry so much about me. I'll behave. I'll return to the Inner Palace-"

His hand caught her wrist in time, tugging her back.

"If it would not bother you, Shujou," Keiki looked at her sheepishly, "In return of your kindness to this inept servant, would it be allowed for you to visit a place where you can relax for awhile? I shall bring refreshments."

A/N: I'm deleting my monologues from the previous file, lol. How did you find this chapter? Let me know by leaving a review. Thank you everyone for your patience!