****Author's note: I am so very sorry everyone! Life, the cruel heartless b*tch that she is, threw me many curve balls over that last little while. Now that I am past it I am back with a vengeance! Hope you all haven't given up on me! As always these fun little people belong to Mrs. Meyer...I just cant seem to let them go lol!***
"I said I heard you." I yelled back at Rose. I was driving to work and Rose had called me extremely early this morning to start berating me about the possibility of a date with Edward. "Look Bella, the point is, you can't not talk to him about it."
"Christ with Cheeto-s Ro, don't you think I know that? Good lord isn't it a little early for this conversation?" I asked eyeing the clock on my dashboard with disdain.
"If you ask me Swan, its far over due if anything." Rose replies smugly. I sighed. It was entirely way too early to be this frustrated already. So much for my warm fuzzies I had last night. Rose had already drilled me the entire time I was doing my hair, getting dressed, eating breakfast, which incidentally went into the trash can rather than getting eaten, and now we could add the entire drive to work to that list I thought to myself, as I pulled in the parking lot.
"Rose, not now ok? I get it, but you have got to cut me a little slack here."
"You know that's not my style kitten." She replied softly. "Sometimes you need pushing, and its my job to push." I sighed extremely loudly into the phone.
"I know it Ro." "Shut up, you love me. Go have a good day at the shop hooker." She said. And just like that my anger had faded. Rose may be hard on me, but I knew she always had the best intentions.
"Yeah, yeah, you love me too. Go sell something pretty." I said back, and disconnected the call. Truth be told I could never stay mad at Rose for long, and she knew it. She knew just how to play me. But then again I think Rose had figured me out from day one.
"And so now what?" Angela asked. I had relayed the story of running into Edward. Angela and I were close but there were things she didn't know either. However she remembered Edward fondly from high school, and I felt it my duty to tell her he was home to visit.
"And so now, well I don't know."
"Well why don't you call him?"
"Ang seriously, it was just yesterday. I don't think I need to call him within 24 hours. That seems a little extreme. Plus it's kind of awkward. I haven't really seen him in years. For all I know he's not even the same person I remember. Hell, I don't know if I'm the same person he remembers either. "
Before Ang could respond to my statement, the bell over the door chimed and in walked Jacob. With a smile he sauntered over to the counter where Ang and I had been perched gossiping. He laid his hand on top of mine, and leaned across the counter to give me a swift kiss on the cheek.
"Morning ladies, how's the fort holding up?" I smiled as best I could and said
"Good. Getting ready for story time here in tiny bit."
"Cool.", replied Jake. "I'm going to head up to Pt. Angeles for the day and I thought I'd check and see if you needed anything while I was up there Bells." He said facing me.
"Nah, I'm good. I got a list at home set aside. I was thinking about heading up this weekend to take care of it all."
"Hey, that's cool. I just thought I'd asked." Jake replied. I'm not sure what it was but something about his demeanor seemed almost defensive. Once again, I sighed internally. Jake wanted me to depend on him; to need him. And when I didn't he always seemed to get a little fussy. Over time this friendship was starting to become a little more than I had ever bargained for. And then I began to wonder if Edward had ever felt that way about me.
"Did you hear the Cullen twins are back in town?" Ang asked Jacob. Jacob made a face and eyed me closely.
"Yeah I saw Alice over at Bella's the other night. As for Edward, well..."
Ang of course was trying to go for her Chatty-Cathy award today apparently. "Bella ran into Edward yesterday, didn't you, Bells?" I nodded my head and had to look away from Jacob. I could almost feel the heat that instantly radiated off of him.
"What did that asshole say to you Bella?" Jacob growled. Angela gasped, a little shocked at his outburst. Again, she didn't know the half of it.
"He didn't say anything Jacob, he was perfectly nice.
"Oh, right. So pretty boy can just walk away and the think years later…"
"Enough!" I growled at Jacob. "This is not the time, not the place, and it is NOT your business." I said to him.
"It is my business Bella. He wasn't there! I was! I saw every moment of what happened! I lived through that, not him!" I closed my eyes, trying to block out the barrage of memories and to stop the impending nausea.
"Get out of the store Jacob. Do not talk to me again until you have figured out how to calm yourself down and grow up a little, either." I could feel Jacob back away from the counter. I slowly opened my eyes to look at him and took a deep breath.
"Fine Bella", he said quietly walking backward out of the store. "Just don't get yourself in the same mess again. I won't help you through it a second damn time." He stated and shoved his way out the door so hard I was afraid it would come off the hinges. Ang looked at me extremely confused.
"I'm sorry Bella. I have no idea what that even was, but if anything I said…"
"Stop," I told her. "You did nothing wrong." I smiled one of my fakest smiles and went to the back to grab a bottle of water. I stayed in the back for a few minutes to calm down until I heard little voice of Jackson in the front of the store. Story time was about to begin and I needed to get my game face on.
I waited while all the children clapped, and flipped to my final story. I was reading the kids some Shel Silverstein, and when I did poetry I always did quite a few, otherwise story time would be over in 2 minutes. My hat for the day was a tiara, chosen by a beautiful little five year old girl, whose name so help me was escaping me today. I seriously needed to get with the program.
"The final story for today is called "The Giving Tree." I told the children. "This is one of my very favorites, and I hope very much that you like it too." The kids all eyed me with interest as I began.
"Once there was a tree… and she loved a little boy."
I loved the rapt attention the children listened with, and read it to them very slowly; letting the message of the story sink in. I was almost near the end when I heard the bell over my door chime once more. The sound was almost obscenely loud with the quiet of story time.
""I don't need very much now", said the boy. "Just a quiet place to sit and rest. I am very tired"". I read to the children as I looked up to the door. I faltered in my reading as I realized Edward Cullen was standing at the very back of all the children. My heart tugged out of my chest as if trying to jump over them to get to him. He has my beautiful smile plastered all over his face. His hands were shoved into the pockets of an Adidas windbreaker over a black t-shirt, and well worn jeans slug low on his hips. My mouth went dry, and I realized I had forgotten where I was in the story. I looked back down in my book to continue reading, trying to find my voice, when I heard Edward, from the back say.
"Well", said the tree, straightening herself up as much as she could, "well, an old stump is good for sitting and resting. Come, Boy, sit down… sit down and rest".And the boy did. And the tree was happy…The End."
All the children were turned around looking at Edward and started clapping and smiling. I, however still had not found my voice. I didn't know what to do. I laid the book aside in my basket, to put it back on the shelf, and went to pull the tiara from off my head. Of course, the tiny combs were stuck in my hair and I began tugging trying to get the damn thing off. I could see the children pairing off with their parents and milling through the children's books section. Ang had picked up Jackson and was now standing talking to Edward. Edwards's attention seemed to be split between her, and my ridiculous attempt to get the tiara off my head, and I swear he was trying not to laugh at me. Damn you Chuck Norris, just a little bit of help would be nice! I thought to myself. After one final tug it pulled from my hair. I patted my hair down in an attempt to smooth out all the knots I knew had formed, sucked in a deep breath and headed in their direction. I smiled and nodded to some of the parents as I made my way over stopping here and there to talk to them and their children. I loved this part of my job. When I got to talk to parents, and hear them tell me how much their little ones loved coming to story time. I stopped to talk to one mother specifically telling me that her daughter was over picking out "The Giving Tree" today to take home. All the while I was aware of Edwards's eyes on me. It was a strange feeling, equal parts exciting and nerve wracking just the same.
After I had finished my conversation with the woman, I took the two final steps over to Angela and Edward.
Before I could even say a word Jackson cried out" Bel-ly!" and squirmed in his mommas arms reaching out for me. I took him from Angela's arms and planted a kiss on his cheek.
"So what did you think of today's story?" I asked him. He pulled a face at me and said "Sad."
"Sad? Why Jack?"
The sweet thing looked almost near tears as he said "The boy cut the tree down." I smiled a little a rubbed my nose against his and said "But the tree was happy Jack. The tree was happy to give the little boy everything she could, just so that the little boy would be happy. The tree loved him that much."
He looked a little too thoughtful for a child and then whispered "Like mommy loves Jackson?" And there it was. My job, done. I smiled widely and said "Yes, just like your mommy loves you." I could feel the beginning of tears sneaking up on me and planted a kiss quickly on his forehead to give myself something to do. I realized I had forgotten that Edward was standing right there and I met his eyes with a shy smile. He smiled back in answer and I turned my attention back to Jackson.
"So listen , I want you to be a big helper to mommy ok? And if your mommy tells me you were very, very good for her, I'll let you pick out the story for Saturday, ok?"
His whole face lit up as he nodded his head."O.K. I be good for mommy, belly, I promise!" "
OK baby, now you and mommy need to head home." I said smiling as I set Jackson down and he took Angela's hand smiling. I said goodbye and thanked her for coming in.
"No prob, Bella, you know I love it here." She said. I noticed Edwards eyes looked confused for a moment, but cleared when Angela faced him and said "It was great was to see you again, Edward. I hope you'll be in town for a while." Edward smiled and nodded at her, but his attention was on me. As they made their way to the front of the store I put my hands in my back pockets, unsure what to do.
It was so awkward. Here stood the boy that had been my very best friend. And I had no idea what to say or do. It was the first time I met him all over again, but he was no longer a boy. He was a grown man. And a damn fine looking one too at that, my brain added.
"Hey." I said. Oh my god Bella, how lame can you be I cringed internally.
"Hey" he replied in kind, running his hand through his hair. "I'm, uh, I'm really sorry about yesterday. You know with the food and all…"
He waved his hand at me "Oh it was no big deal. Nothing that didn't wash out, anyway." He smiled at me. And, again with the extremely awkward silence.
"So, what brings you in today?" I asked him. I figured if I treated him as a customer that would give me somewhere to go with the conversation. I never had problems talking to someone who came into the store to buy something.
"Well, Alice said I had to come check this place out. It's nice Forks finally has its own book store. It's really quaint. Do you like working here?" He asked. Apparently Alice hadn't told him the store was mine, and I felt no immediate need to correct him.
"Yeah, I like it. I love coming into work which is more than a lot of people can say." I replied. "Was there anything you were looking for while you were here?" I said, waving my hands around the shelves.
"No, not really I just wanted to take a look around." He said. "You read the kids stories every day?"
"No, not every day; Tuesdays, Thursday, and Saturdays."
"Does Ang read the other days he asked?"
"Oh no," I told him, "She just comes in to help me on story time days cause those are my busiest times, and that way if someone comes in during a story, I don't have to make either them or the children wait while I help the other." He cocked his head at me.
"You have Angela come in?" He asked. Well crap I had ousted myself on that one.
"Yeah." I said. He turned his head towards the children's corner, and looked back at me. Then he turned and walked back to my box of hats for story time. He pulled out the gaudy jeweled head piece in there and looked back at me.
"This is from when you went as Cleopatra, right?" I smiled and nodded at him. He seemed to take in the store with new eyes and turned with a huge smile on his face. "This is yours, isn't it?" He asked spreading his arms out in a gesture of the store. I nodded my head. "No shit, Bella?" he asked. I had to laugh.
"No shit Edward." I stated back.
"Well holy shit Swan! Were you gonna tell me or just let me stand here like an idiot?"
"I don't know." I laughed back. "Idiot looks pretty good on you." I said. He threw his head back and laughed.
"Jesus, I'm glad I didn't start asking if your boss was some slave driving bitch or anything!"
I smiled again and said "I am though. I work my own self pretty hard. I don't know how an actual boss could do worse. "I replied.
"Wow Bella. Just wow. This is some fucking shit, you know that? Good for you!" He said.
"You always did have a way with words." I laughed at him. He stepped closer and made a movement like he thought about hugging me, and then stopped, swinging his arms awkwardly at his sides.
"Well, hey, look. Mom is cooking this big dinner tomorrow for Alice and I. Alice is having a couple people over. I'm sure she'll be telling you about it but I thought I'd invite you first. It always used to piss her off when I beat her to the punch." He said.
"Yeah, sure, I'd love to."
What?! What had I just agreed to? Dinner? At his parents' house! With Carlisle and Emse? Oh god what if they told him? What if they decided to tell him after I came over? Oh Jesus. But it was too late. I couldn't change my mind now.
"Well, okay then. " He said with my crooked smile across his face. And then he reached forward and hugged me. It caught me so off guard that my arms were still down at my sides, and he ended up more hugging my upper arms than anything while I just stood there. He pulled away quickly and said "Seven okay by you?"
"Yeah, seven's good. I'll see you then." "Catch you later Bella-rina." He said with a wink.
The instant he was out the door I sagged against the counter. Oh what had I done? I could figure out if I should jump around like a giddy 13 year old, or go start a new career as an alcoholic at the local bar. Sighing I lifted my head up and stared straight at the flower drawn on my calendar. Either way I went I was running out of time. I would have to tell him soon. I could feel it in the marrow of my bones. I looked around the store making sure it was empty before I walked into the back and grabbed my cell phone out of my purse. I punched in the number and waited while it rang.
"Hi-ya!" squeaked a little voice.
"So Alice…about that life size Bella-Barbie thing…" I said she squealed, loudly. I had to pull the phone away from my ear.
"Go on!" She prompted.
"What do I wear to dinner at your parent's house tomorrow?" I asked.
"That asshole asked you first! Damn it he knows how much I hate that!" I had to laugh. Edward had been right. Some things never change. "Ok Bella," Alice began, kicking into over drive. "I'll call Rose and we'll meet you at your house tonight. Here's what I want you to do…"
***Well? What do you think? XOXOXOXO