I had a feeling I knew what Clark was going to say. In times like this he could usually be counted on to give the exact opposite advice than what Bruce would tell me to do. Clark took a deep breath. Yep, just what I thought.
"I know what I'm asking of you won't be easy. If it were Lois, I..."
"If it were Lois she'd still be so hung up on Superman you'd never have to wonder how she felt." Somehow admitting that Star meant more to me than just my teammate wasn't so bad when I was talking to him. Maybe it's because I've heard the cringe-worthy stories of the desperate lengths he's gone to protect Lois, keep her away from his secret, and try and find a way to be with her. Next to him, my problems seemed pretty straightforward. He inclined his head in minor agreement.
"Watch your back out there. Just because this trouble found you on Earth doesn't mean that it can't follow you to Tamaran."
"I know how to look after my team. I'm not him." If it were Bruce in my shoes he'd have sent Star packing for bringing scandal down on the Titan's reputation. He would completely over look the double-standard he lives by filling the tabloid covers with his playboy personas. Once, he and Catwoman were even caught on a museum security feed making out over a display case, and that made the rounds in the gossip rags for several weeks. Still, Batman has a set of rules for himself and a set of rules he expects the rest of us to follow. Call him on it and he'll get all condescending and come up with some lame excuse for why he's allowed to get away with things the rest of us can't. Lately, he's given up explaining himself and just starts answering with, 'Because I'm Batman.' Try arguing with that and see how far you get. And people wonder why I moved out of the mansion...
Clark regarded me seriously.
"He looked after you, Robin. He still looks after you. Who do you think sent us to help you just now?" I flinched.
"I activated the distress beacon in my communicator," I said stubbornly. I didn't like the idea of Bruce coming to my rescue without me realizing it. I didn't want him hovering over me waiting to save me from my own mistakes. Superman smiled sadly.
"We were already entering the stratosphere when you called for help. I may be able to go supersonic, but Diana can't. She never would have made it here from the Watchtower in less than three minutes." He tilted his head, studying me. "He knew you wouldn't accept his help. That's why he sent us."
"Batman doesn't come out in broad daylight," I said mulishly. That wasn't strictly true. In Gotham he preferred to work under the cover of night, but when he traveled to other cities to aid the citizens and heroes there he wasn't as strict about the hours that he kept. Criminals outside of Gotham were usually so terrified to find themselves going up against the Bat that he didn't need the dark to strike fear into their hearts.
"Robin, you know he cares about you. He just has a hard time showing it."
"You know he hates her because she's an alien, don't you?" I threw back at him. Let him see his best friend for what he really was. "She doesn't have a weakness that he can exploit so he doesn't trust her. No kryptonite rings for Star! There's no failsafe in place if she goes rogue and he can't handle it. He's been trying to convince me to get rid of her ever since she landed on Earth."
"No, he's been trying to get rid of her ever since he saw you practically threaten the Mayor of Jump City after his wife said something about her table manners. I heard all about it...repeatedly." It shouldn't have surprised me that Bruce talked about me with Clark, but for some reason it did. I could just imagine him scowling at the keyboard of the Bat computer while Clark smiled patiently down from the wall-sized monitor.
"You think an alien threat could be behind this?" I asked, changing the subject as Raven entered the garage carrying a slim black suitcase. Wonder Woman appeared behind her and together they started loading up the T-ship that was parked in the hangar portion of our massive garage.
"I wouldn't rule it out," Superman said softly. "Tamaran has been very vocal about wanting their princess back. Their planet has been torn by civil war without a true And'r heir to sit on the throne. If someone wanted to seize power, incarcerating the princess on Earth or discrediting her with the accusations that have begun circulating would be a good start to making her ineligible to take the throne." I wipe my hand over my face. I hated politics. Politicians were backstabbers no matter what world they came from.
"Thanks for your help, Superman, but I think my team and I will have to take it from here." Really, the thought that this whole marriage might be an elaborate plot to trap Starfire was giving me too much hope that it could be prevented. Hope was the last thing I should be feeling. I rushed off to my room to grab a few spare uniforms and extra birdarangs.
Starfire arrived last to the ship. She had all of her belongings packed away in a deceptively small orange satchel that looked no bigger than a grocery bag. She, Wonder Woman, and Superman were the only ones who could lift it though. The straps left dents in Cyborg's fingers when he attempted to shift it out of the way while we topped off our fuel.
"It is an impressive ship," said Wonder Woman. "Flash explained that you designed it yourselves."
"It was really all my idea," Beast Boy said smoothly, puffing out his chest in a vain attempt to impress her. Diana didn't look as though she though him capable of operating a pair of sneakers, much less a spaceship. Raven rolled her eyes and sent a black tentacle of power snaking around his torso to pull him away before he made a bigger fool of himself.
"We wish you a safe journey, Titans. May Hera smile upon you." She rapped her knuckles lightly against the hull of the ship before she moved back to stand next to Superman. The Titans and I boarded the T-ship and fastened ourselves into our individual pods. Cyborg had spent a lot of free time improving the technology in the T-ship, and I felt much better about this launch than I had before our last.
"I can't believe you told Wonder Woman that you designed my ship," came Cyborg's voice over the headsets.
"Dude, did you see? She was totally digging me."
"Right," Raven drawled sarcastically. "The personification of female empowerment is totally into the guy who thought the feminist movement was about changing the cup shape of bras so they weren't 'pointy' anymore."
"What? I thought they burned them because they thought they were ugly and uncomfortable. Guys back me up, things have gotten a lot better since they started making round bras instead of cones, am I right?"
"Beast Boy, you're going to want to stop talking now," I said in clipped tones as I initiated the launch sequence from my console. Cyborg would navigate, but I was in charge of takeoff and landing.
"Come on, Cy, back me up on this one," Beast Boy whined over the radio. I gritted my teeth.
"Nuh-huh. That's a minefield I won't cross for you, buddy."
"Oh, come on!"
"It's a long ride Beast Boy. It's going to be even longer for you if I let Raven send you to a dimension of her choosing." I maneuvered the ship out of the hangar and into the sunlight. He wasn't giving up easily though.
"Starfire, don't you think bras are much nicer now than in those old movies you like to watch?" Even with most of my concentration on steering I did a double-take that he'd actually addressed one of the girls with his nonsense. I distinctly heard Raven growling in my earpiece.
"I am confused. Are the bras meant to serve a purpose? The boy who works at the lingerie store told me that they were merely for decoration. They are designed to coordinate with the thongs. Is that not correct?" I closed my eyes, summoning patience while refusing to acknowledge the tempting images that fluttered at the fringes of my imagination.
"I don't think that guy worked at the store, Star."
"But he did," she insisted loudly, making me wince. "He even offered to accompany me into the room of dressing to make sure I selected a matching pair."
There was stunned radio silence following that announcement. I didn't dare look toward Cyborg's pod. I wasn't sure whether he'd be more amused at my over-protective jealousy, or outraged that some scumbag had taken advantage of her. I guess that's not the best way to put it. Tamaranians are a very free race. Starfire would happily flit around the tower naked if I let her. She wouldn't have thought twice about stripping down in front of some stranger. The thought made my blood boil.
"Starfire, I thought we talked about this," said Raven slowly. There was an edge of danger to her voice which meant she was wishing the sleaze-ball into the lowest pit in hell too.
"I declined his offer," Starfire said, sounding surprised by our reaction. "He only suggested the thongs, he did not even mention the g-strings. If minimal coverage is the desired goal then he is a very poor man of sales." Oh God. Starfire prefers g-strings and she likes to match them with her bras. Why did she have to tell me that when I was sitting in a spaceship in plain view of my teammates? Our pods weren't exactly designed for privacy, and thanks to that little revelation I was having a difficult time keeping my er...head down. Only in stealth mode did a black-tinted casing shield us from view, and it would be entirely too conspicuous if I suddenly raised my shield before we even took off. Thanks Star. Way to make this trip even more painful than it already was. It took a moment of picturing Bruce Wayne in a thong with the Bat emblem stitched across the front before I had sufficiently grossed myself out enough that the blood returned to my brain.
"All in favor of radio silence for the remainder of this flight, say aye." Frantically I started mashing the buttons that would get us into the air. The ship began to hum with power.
"AYE!" Cyborg, Raven, and I all cried in desperate unison. Beast Boy and Starfire sputtered.
"Overruled," Cyborg cried gleefully as we shot into the sky. The last thing we heard before he muted our mic feeds was Beast Boy asking if he could go to the bathroom. Yep...a long flight.