Training exercise....training exercise...what would work for team 7? Kakashi wondered to himself. As per usual he was spending time at the memorial stone. What would Sensei do? He mused.
Well, sensei would have made them live, sleep and breathe together until they learned to tolerate each other. Wait....there was something there. A survival exercise that would do it! Toss them into one of the more...dangerous training grounds and leave them there for a week. If they didn't kill each other or die then they should be able to work together.
Kakashi isn't really the best teacher for new genin is he? Still he means well.
Now which training ground to use? Not 44, it was earmarked for the exams anyway. Anko always got pissy if you used it. Kakashi groused to himself. Well there was Training ground 50....yeah, that could work. Now it was time to go do the paper work to get it for a week.
With that thought Kakashi left the training grounds in a swirl of leaves.
Complex
"Faster boy! Those clones should have been dead five minutes ago!" Rikimaru shouted.
Naruto grunted as he twisted a clone's neck. Every day it was the same thing. Work out, learn/perfect a new technique, slaughter an army of clones... Every day he had to be faster. As Naruto launched a kick that would kill a real person into a clone; he wondered at what point killing had become second nature to him.
The scarred old man looked on at Naruto dispassionately. The boy had grown in leaps and bounds. If Rikimaru was honest with himself, he'd admit that the boy was almost as good as he was at the age, almost. Still, given what was in store; the boy has a long way to go. Rikimaru mused.
Naruto slid back into a neutral stance as he finished off the last of the clones.
"Your last kick was too high, you still take too long snapping necks and your punches are getting sloppy. If we had the time I'd make you do it all over again. But Jin wants to start teaching you the fine game of politics. So get a shower and go talk to him."
"Hai, Sensei." The blond said.
"You did a decent job on the throat punch today. Perhaps next time you can say the same about your kidney punch." Rikimaru called out.
"Yes sensei." Naruto said shaking his head.
Rikimaru rarely gave unconditional praise, he knew that. But since Shin's death, both of his senseis had been pushing him harder. The whiskered shinobi wasn't quite sure what to make of that. He could understand keeping the training up so that he could continue to be ahead of Sasuke. The mission needed that.
But this wasn't about that. Or it didn't seem that way to Naruto. Rather, it felt like both of his senseis were trying to cram in as much as they could before they died. That idea hurt him more than it should. Naruto thought bitterly to himself.
He still wasn't completely over Shin's death. Naruto doubted that he'd ever be completely over it. You always remember the first time you lose a family member; always. Naruto pushed the morose musing out of his mind as he walked over to Jin.
"Alright kid...Sarutobi wants me to start teaching you fine game of politics." Jin began.
"Yes, sensei. Still don't really agree with it but..." Naruto shrugged.
"You're better than you know. Now, the first lesson of politics is this: Everyone has a price, and it's often much cheaper than we'd like." The huge man said with a sigh.
"So it's better to appeal to self interest?" The blond asked.
"Yes. People are dumb, stupid animals. Appeal to their wallets and guts and they'll play to your tune. A person is different. A person you can reason with. The mob can't be reasoned with."
"That's rather cynical, Sensei." Naruto said.
"I've seen enough peasant rebellions to know how things work. It usually starts simple. A hike in taxes, a child gets hurt, some idiot kills an elder. The people start talking. Something else happens, a famine or more people hurt or more taxes. People get angry. And then some idiot, usually the nobility, does something stupid. Then we get hired and people start dying." The dark haired man retorted.
"I see. So what does the Hokage do?"
"That depends. Konoha has always been the nice guy of the Hidden Villages. On the whole, a Hokage has four main duties; two internal duties and two external. Internally, a Hokage has to keep the civilians happy and prosperous and keep the ninjas happy and busy. Externally, a Hokage has to keep the Daimyo from turning on him and fulfill the contract."
"But Konoha is a military dictatorship." Naruto pointed out.
"And you're wondering why we have to keep the civilians happy?" The black haired man asked amused.
"Well...yeah." The blue-eyed boy said sheepishly.
"Simply put, we need them. An army marches on its stomach. Wars are won and lost on gold." Jin answered.
"I've heard that somewhere before." The blond frowned.
"Indeed you have its taken from 'The Hidden Art of War' by Kutsuna Aoba. Amongst other things it's considered one of the finest books on War there is." The bespectacled man said with sage tone.
"Can I read it?" The whiskered ninja asked.
"You will. Now where was I?" Jin wondered out loud.
"Wars are won and lost on gold."
"Right, the reason we need civilians is because of logistics. They grow/import our food, make our weapons, and a host of other minor things. All of these are things we could do ourselves but not as well."
"So we need them....do they need us?"
*Smack* Jin smacked Naruto in the head.
"Don't be stupid. Of course they do. The reason people sleep safely at night is because rough men stand ready to do violence on their behalf." The genjutsu user scowled.
"Who said that?" The blond asked.
"No one really knows; it's from before the Rikudo Sennin. Although most attribute it to someone named Orwell."
"Who?" Naruto blinked.
"No idea."
"Alright, so everyone has a price. How do you figure what the price is?" The blond asked.
"Well, you read them like you would in battle. Take a look at this picture."
Jin pulled out a small photograph of Chouza Akimichi.
"Chouji's dad." Naruto answered.
"What can you tell me about him?" The black haired man demanded. After looking at it for a moment Naruto began speaking out loud.
"He's a brawler. Doesn't like subtlety but can do it if necessary. He's loyal. Eats because he has to not because he's greedy. Probably a Papa Wolf. I can't tell much more than that."
"Mostly accurate, he's also someone who is rather kind. Now how does that translate into the political arena?" The burly man asked.
"I don't know." The blond shrugged.
"Alright, he's a brawler but not a boisterous one. That means he's not a natural politician or leader. He's not naturally subtle so he tends to wait and see. He's extremely loyal, but a follower. He lets others do the talking. Anything coming between him and his family is an enemy. Last but not least he is someone with a conscience. Prove to him that you are working for Konoha and he'll follow." Jin said.
"You got all that from a picture?" The whiskered ninja was incredulous.
"No, I got all that from having met the man. You can tell a lot about people from how they look. But you'll never get the full story unless you actually talk about them. Even people you've known for years can surprise you." The dark haired man explained.
"So why did you ask me to do that then?" Naruto asked frowning.
"Two reasons, one to introduce you to a potential ally. The other reason is to teach you not to just rely on what your intuition says." The bespectacled man said wryly.
"Thanks, Sensei."
"Alright, now that's out of the way let's talk about the factions...."
Jin launched into a very detailed lecture on the various internal politics of Konoha. Naruto listened apathetically at first but gradually became more and more interested as time went on.
Glancing over at the setting sun Jin gave a smile.
"That's it for now. Go get some sleep we'll pick it up next week."
The blond nodded and made his way to Ichikaru's. Rikimaru walked in carrying a shogi board. Placing it in front of his friend, the two began to play.
"So how did it go?" The scarred man asked.
"Alright I'd say. Kid's got good instincts." Jin said.
"We already knew that." The bald man muttered.
Jin just smiled as he took the first piece of the game.
"Let me rephrase it. Remember the picture test we got?"
"Yeah." Rikimaru said.
"He got more than either of us did."
"Really?" The short man raised an eyebrow.
"He was able to figure out that Chouzu Akimichi can be subtle but doesn't like it." The burly man said with pride.
"Better than we did."
"I think he's got the knack." Jin said.
"The knack?" Rikimaru asked dryly.
"You know what I mean." Jin growled good-naturedly.
"His father's gift, then." The scarred man said.
Jin took another piece.
"Yep, Minato was one of the best commanders there ever was."
"Kid's going to be a hell of Hokage." Rikimaru said.
"Isn't he just?" The burly man gave a disturbing grin.
"Jin, what did we say about grinning like that?" The scarred man said.
Giving a frown as he lost a piece Jin spoke.
"No children around to scare, Riki."
"Point."
"So how's the kid coming along otherwise?" The burly man asked.
"His taijutsu is getting there. A couple of more weeks and he'll be adequate." Rikimaru answered.
"Meaning he can take down a Jonin with his bare hands, I take it?" Jin chuckled.
"As I said, adequate." The bald man scowled.
"Only you would call being able to take a Jonin 'adequate'." The dark haired man said wryly.
"You know the kid's going to have enough enemies." The short man scowled.
"True, find anything else in the library?" Jin asked.
"A few training scrolls on the elements. Figure we'll get him started on that in a few weeks." The scarred man gave a shrug.
"Going to make him like Sarutobi are we?" Jin said dryly.
Sarutobi was fairly unique amongst ninjas. Most ninjas stuck to one or two elements and made them work regardless of the situation. Smarter Ninjas generally learned to control elements that complemented each other. Sarutobi didn't do that. Instead, he learned and mastered all elements that didn't require a blood line. This allowed Sarutobi to dominate any battles he fought. Well that, and being fiendishly inventive at hurting people.
"Hell no, we're going to make him better!" Rikimaru said with a laugh.
"That we are, Riki; that we are." Jin replied as he took another piece.
Training Ground 50
"Hello everybody!" Kakashi said.
He had gathered his team at the entrance to a massive cave complex. The entrance was a vertical hole.
"Kakashi-sensei." Sakura said.
"Sensei." Naruto greeted.
"Hn." Sasuke nodded.
"Alright, we're going to have a little training today. Some light exercises." The silver haired man said.
This is was, of course, a signal for three shadow clones. The clones drained Kakashi a fair bit but not to crippling levels. The clones grabbed and threw the Genin into the hole.
"DAMMIT!" Sasuke shouted.
"Go to hell, Sensei!" Naruto snarled, throwing a kunai at all of them.
Unfortunately, Naruto failed to hit any of them. Or is that fortunately? Either way, no one got stabbed.
"What are you doing?" Sakura wondered.
The three landed at the bottom of the cave in a heap. Kakashi looked down.
"I'll be back in a week, have fun!" He said with an eye smile.
"That's it, he's on the list." The blond said.
The trio stood up looking around the cave.
"The list?" The pinkette asked.
"My list of people to painfully cripple." The whiskered boy answered.
"You have a list of people to painfully cripple?" The bookworm said.
"I do now."
"Well it could be worse, right?" She asked.
*Hssssss* A large hissing sound filled the cavern.
"I hate you so very much." Naruto said.
"Please tell me that isn't a giant snake." Sasuke deigned to enter the conversation.
"Alright, I won't tell you." Sakura replied.
It was indeed a giant snake. Roughly twenty meters...give or take. None of the trio could make out what it looked like in the darkness very well. It seemed to be dark grey in colour with white patches.
Slowly the snake coiled around the group in a circle. Sasuke began to make the seals for his fireball jutsu.
"Stop you idiot. We're underground we don't know how much air we have down here." Sakura said quietly.
"We have to kill it." The dark haired boy pointed out.
"Let me try and cut it." Naruto said unsealing his sword.
Naruto swung his sword at the snake intending to cut it one stroke. The sword bounced with a loud clang. The snake quickly struck, grabbing Naruto in a death grip.
"Fuck guys...I could use a little help. Its skin is armoured. Go for the eyes if you can!" The blond gasped out.
Sakura and Sasuke pulled out their kunai. The two ran up and stabbed the snake in the eyes. However the death grip on Naruto didn't loosen. If anything it got tighter. Sasuke and Sakura looked at each other neither knowing what to do.
"Open its mouth and stick and explosive note in there. Hurry, I can feel my ribs breaking." The whiskered Genin said.
"Naruto, we don't have any." Sakura whispered in horror.
"Fuck I'll do it myself." The blond snarled.
Naruto slid out one of his explosive notes and slapped on the snake detonating it. The snake gave a loud hiss but slightly loosened its grip. It was just enough for Naruto to grab another explosive note and stuff it into the snake's mouth.
The snake's head exploded. Pulling himself away from the carcass. Naruto said:
"Fucking snake."
"You okay?" The pinkette asked.
"I'll be fine. I got it before it actually broke anything. I'll be sore for a bit, that's all."
"Good." Surprisingly Sasuke said this.
"What the hell was that thing anyway?" The whiskered boy asked.
"I think it was a meteor snake." Sakura answered slowly.
"A what?" Both boys asked.
"It's rare snake that has a virtually impenetrable hide. They're usually found in Moon Country." Sakura answered.
For once, her encyclopaedic knowledge came in handy. Sakura felt proud of herself.
"So what's it doing here?" The blond asked.
Naruto wasn't book smart. Ask him to fight, ask him to train, and he'd do it. But books never appealed to him. Unless they were about fighting.
"This is obviously a training ground. They probably decided to add dangerous creatures for some reason." Sasuke reasoned.
"Great. So what do we do?" The pinkette asked.
"Try and find a way out I guess." The onyx-eyed boy gave a shrug.
"How much food do we have?" Naruto asked.
Three knapsacks fell from the sky.
"Here are your supplies! Sorry about that. I forgot to give them to you earlier." Kakashi shouted down.
"Yeah definitely on the List." The blond said.
"Well let's check and see what we got." Sakura said studiously.
Admittedly, Sakura also had Kakashi on the list for punishment. But she didn't see any need to keep the fires burning as it were.
The trio searched through the knapsacks. They found enough rations for a week, some glow sticks, a compass....and a copy of Icha Icha Tactics. They all sighed at that.
"Well at least we have toilet paper." Naruto said at last.
Sakura chuckled and Sasuke gave a small smile at that.
"I figure there's got to be another way out of here." Sakura pointed out.
"Yeah should we go looking though?" Sasuke asked.
"We can always mark our trail." Naruto answered.
"Good point." The dark haired boy agreed.
"Before we head out...we need a team leader." The whiskered ninja said.
"And you think it should be you?" Sasuke said in a low tone.
"No...I'm out of my element here." The blond admitted.
Sasuke held the other boy's gaze for a long minute before saying.
"Hate to admit it but so am I."
"I know a bit but not much." The bookworm said.
"More than we do." Naruto pointed out.
"What are you guys saying?" The pinkette asked.
The two boys looked at each other for a few moments.
"I think we're saying you're in charge." The blond one spoke.
"Seriously?" The green-eyed girl asked.
"Yeah..." The dark haired one answered.
Sakura was admittedly floored. She had never considered herself much of a leader. It had always been someone else who did it. On team 7, it was usually Naruto. But Naruto was voluntarily stepping aside in this case. He was placing his trust in her and so was Sasuke. In an instant she decided that she wouldn't let them down.
"Alright if you guys are sure... then I'll do it."
"So what do we do?" Naruto asked.
"Err...for now we'll go in a triangle formation. Sasuke you and I will take point until Naruto's fully up. Then we'll switch off every day. Naruto, I want you to mark our trail as we explore this place." The pinkette said nervously.
"Aye aye boss." The whiskered Genin said.
"Let's head out." The bookworm said after a moment.
The trio made their way deeper into the cave system.
Rusty Kunai (6 hours later)
"So, Kakashi, did you figure what you're going to do with your team?" Asuma asked.
Their usual trio of Jonin senseis was bigger today. Yugao, Anko and Hayate had all shown up. They were all drinking sake tonight. It was cheap, and buying for six people got expensive fast the way they drank.
"Yep." The gray haired man said with an eye smile.
"What?" Hayate asked between coughs.
"I tossed them into Training area 50." The one-eyed Jonin said.
"You threw them into the Cave of Doom.....do I even want to know why?" Yugao asked slowly.
"Well they'll either learn to work together. Or die trying." Kakashi said simply.
"And you don't see the latter part of that as a bad thing?" Kurenai asked incredulously.
"Naruto's too stubborn to let anyone die." The masked ninja said with a wave.
"I dunno Kakashi; you've had some harebrained schemes before, but this takes the cake." The bearded Jonin said.
"What are you guys worrying about; I'm sure they're fine." Kakashi said dismissively.
Cave of Doom
"Why the hell are there giant spiders?" Naruto shouted.
There were indeed giant spiders. Currently they were doing their best to eat our heroes...well protagonists...alive. Seeing as how they were size of a small pick-up truck, our protagonists were having some difficulties.
"I don't know, but they're not dying." Sasuke shouted back.
"Stab it in the eye!" The blond said, quickly following his own advice and blinding one of the creatures.
"What is it with you and stabbing things in the eye?" The last Uchiha asked. The boy did do as told and blinded another spider.
"I go with what works. Where's Sakura?" The whiskered boy asked. He cleaved his sword through another leg.
"She's on the ground rocking back and forth. She's saying 'spiders will eat me' over and over." The black haired boy answered dryly.
"FUCK!" Naruto shouted.
More spiders had shown up. The duo was not happy with this development; not happy at all.
"Screw it; I'm killing them all with fire." Sasuke said after he blinded yet another one.
"Give me a minute to get over there." The blond said. Gutting one spider while dodging another.
"Why?" The onyx eyed boy demanded.
"So I can boost you with a wind jutsu dumbass!" Naruto shouted.
"Oh...well hurry up." Sasuke said. Proceeding to use an explosive note from Naruto to blow up three of them.
"I don't see you doing any better!" The blond snarled.
Rusty Kunai
"You sure Kakashi?" Hayate asked in a hoarse voice.
"When have I ever been wrong?" Kakashi said cavalierly.
"You know if they're not, the Sandaime's going to kill you." Asuma said finishing his drink.
"You guys worry too much. Is it my turn for the round?" The silver haired Jonin asked.
"No, it's mine. Barkeep another round please." Yugao called.
"Why the Cave of Doom anyway? I mean the Forest of Death is easier to access." Kurenai asked.
"Yeah, but Anko always gets bitchy about people going in there." The one-eyed man shrugged.
"I do not." Anko retorted.
"Yes you do." Asuma said.
"Hmmph." Anko pouted.
"What do you think,, Anko is my plan good?" The masked Jonin asked.
Kakashi didn't want Anko unhappy. Bad things tend to happen when she's unhappy.
"I dunno; what are your brats like?" The trench coated woman asked.
"They're all fairly well developed Genin..." Kakashi began.
Cave of Doom
"Katon: Gokakyu no Jutsu!" Sasuke shouted.
"Futon: Daitoppa!" Naruto threw in his jutsu.
A massive fireball enveloped the cavern in front of them, deep frying the remaining giant spiders. The two boys surveyed their work with a smile. They both hated spiders now. Can you really blame them?
"You know, it's like my sensei always says." The blond said.
"Oh?" The loyal Uchiha grunted.
"When in doubt, kill it with fire." The whiskered genin said sagely.
"Seems to work." Sasuke said with a shrug.
The two stayed on guard a little longer. The last thing they needed was to let down their guard and have more spiders show up.
"Sakura's still out of commission." The dark haired boy said.
"I'll carry her. Kage Bunshin no Jutsu." Naruto said.
"Will you teach me that?" Sasuke asked.
"Do you have a giant chakra demon in your stomach giving you insane chakra reserves?" The blonds said with a look.
"Damn."
Sasuke took point. Neither felt any particular need to mark this room. The burn marks on the wall would do just nicely.
Rusty Kunai
"So that's my team." Kakashi finished.
"Well....I guess they could do alright. It's really up to chance. Hope you told them not drink the water." Anko said thoughtfully.
"Why's that?" Kurenai asked.
"There's an algae in the water. It's supposed to work kind of like LSD." The fishnet loving woman said.
"......" They all turned to look at Kakashi who stayed silent.
"You didn't tell them did you?" Yugao finally said.
"Err...no?" Kakashi rubbed the back of his head embarrassed.
"So a kid with the Kyuubi inside him is going to have an acid trip. I can't see this going wrong at all." Asuma said sarcastically.
"In my defence, I didn't know about that beforehand." The silver haired man pointed out.
"Maybe one of the others will drink it first and they'll figure it out." Hayate speculated.
"I hope so." Kurenai said.
Having studied a bit on psychotropic drugs so she could recreate the effects, Kurenai was well aware what a bad trip could do to a person.
The group sat in silence for a while drinking their sake.
"So, you guys nominating your teams for the Chunin exams?" Yugao asked out of the blue.
"Depends on how they do on this little training exercise." Kakashi shrugged.
"Probably." Kurenai answered.
"Same here." Asuma said.
"It's supposed to be a big one this time; a lot of competitors." Hayate said in between coughs.
"Bah, Ibiki and I will whittle them down in no time."Anko said cockily.
"Confident are we?" The ANBU swordswoman said.
"Haven't met a group I couldn't intimidate yet." The trench coated jonin said proudly.
"Maybe this year." Kakashi mused.
"I'll believe it when I see it." Anko was disdainful.
Cave of Doom
The trio had stopped near a small pool of water. Deciding that they would go no farther today, they made camp.
Sakura was slowly coming out her catatonic state. Naruto was currently using his clones to trap the entrances to the cave. Sasuke was getting a drink.
Sasuke drank the water. He felt strange. His skin clammy, mouth dry.
"Sasuke you okay?" Naruto asked.
"Yeah, why?" Sasuke said shaking his head.
"You're all twitchy." The blond answered.
"I am?" The loyal Uchiha said.
Looking down at himself he didn't see anything wrong.
"Yeah." Naruto answered.
"Weird." The dark haired boy shook his head again.
"Yeah. Anyway, we should be okay tonight. I sent a clone to get whatever's handy so we can make a small fire. Need to purify that water." The whiskered Genin said.
"Hmmm....hey, Naruto, are the walls talking?" Sasuke asked.
"No....." Naruto was nonplussed.
"Totally could have sworn they are...hey, don't talk about my mother like that!" The onyx-eyed boy shouted.
"The hell?" The blond was completely confused.
"I am not pathetic!" Sasuke shouted again.
"Sasuke, what are you talking about?" The blue-eyed boy asked.
"Yeah, well, same to you" The loyal Uchiha snarled.
"Dude, what is going on?" Naruto again tried to find this out.
"That is it mother fucker." The dark haired boy began attacking one of the walls.
"Well, this certainly took a turn for a surreal." Naruto said rubbing the top of his head.
"Die you bastard!" The onyx-eyed boy snarled.
"It's going to be a long night." The blond sighed.
"No, it's not my fault, I was child." Sasuke's anger disappeared, only to be replaced with depression.
Naruto, following a hunch, took a small taste of the water. It tasted wrong to him. He could already feel his metabolism kicking into overdrive to process...the toxin.
"Okay...Don't drink the water, got it." The whiskered Genin said.
"It isn't..." Sasuke sobbed.
"This is just sad. Better knock the poor bastard out." The blue-eyed boy said.
Doing so, Naruto set both of his teammates against the wall doing his best to make them comfortable. Sitting down near the entrances, he prepared for a long night. Pulling out a ration bar he took a bite.
"Well this is just super." He muttered to himself. Kakashi was so on the List.
A/N: And we are back for now. Anyways sorry about the wait things have been rather hectic for me and DustBunnyQueen who deserves a big thanks for agreeing to beta for me. Only a few more chapters until the Chuunin exams!