Bpov

Before I knew, it was the last night of our two weeks together. Edward and I had spend the last couple of days pretty much in the same way we spend the first. We talked, watched movies or walked around town. The only difference was the fact that I called Alice and Rose a couple of times a day.

I wanted to know if they had any ideas about a way to 'seduce' Edward. We all had a couple of plans, but there was always something wrong with them.

Finally Alice and Rose told me there was only one thing to do. I had to surprise him in a sexy outfit and throw myself at him before he realised what I was doing.

I didn't really like the idea, but I was running out of time, so I agreed to it.

I had talked Edward into letting me go shopping with the girls. He was reluctant at first, but I threatened with unleashing Alice upon him and he backed of.

The shopping trip was pure hell. For me at least, Alice and Rose seemed to enjoy themselves. We got to the mall and they immediately rushed me of to some lingerie store.

My idea of a sexy outfit had been a short skirt and a tight top, but they had other plans. They wanted me to surprise Edward with lingerie.

I refused, but somehow they convinced me that this was the best way to go. So I tried on about a 100 different sets, until we decided on a blood red lacy set.

It was not me, at all. But I had to agree that it would have the surprise effect we were aiming for. It was actually kind of funny, me planning something like this with the girls.

At some point Rose asked if we could talk. Alice was busy scanning for a new outfit for herself, so we walked out of the shop and sat down on a bench.

"Bella… do you realise what this could come down to?"

She had the most serious look in her eyes.

I felt my cheeks flush when I thought about it.

"Yes I do…" I whispered to her.

"Are you sure you are ready? You only got to know him 2 weeks ago…"

I knew why she was asking me this. I was a virgin after all, and I had been avoiding this kind of thing with the guys I dated before. But I was ready. Edward was different, I felt safe around him.

"I am sure Rose… I know we've only just met, but we have a deep bond. I love him…" I said.

It was the first time I actually said it out loud. Rose looked surprised.

"You love him… does he know?" she asked.

"No he doesn't. At least I haven't told him. I almost did tell him, but I couldn't. Anyway, this whole thing isn't about him loving me. It's about him acknowledging that he can in fact love someone. That person doesn't have to be me."

I didn't tell her that I was sure he wouldn't love me, even if he could. He was just out of my league, but if I told her that she would call the whole thing of.

"And is this how you want your fist time to be? I mean, wouldn't you rather wait for someone who is emotionally available?"

I shook my head.

"I know he doesn't love me Rose, but despite what he says, he does care about me. I want him to be my first, nobody else. It has to be something special, and I know that with Edward it will be just that."

She hugged me and whispered "I hope you know what you're doing…."

The Alice came out of the shop.

"I'm done here… ready to head back?" she asked.

"Yep. Let's go." I responded.

It was ten pm and we were getting ready to go to bed. We had to be out of the room at 9.30 am, so we decided to get to bed early.

I went in to the bathroom to change into my new 'outfit'. I was really nervous. I had never let a guy see me in my underwear before, and to make things worse, this really wasn't something I would wear normally.

'Get a grip. This is your last chance! Tomorrow you'll be back at your own apartment and Edward will be gone!'

I took a deep breath and opened the bathroom door. Edward was sitting on the bed in his pyjama pants. He hadn't noticed me yet, so I walked towards him and stopped right before where he was sitting.

He looked up and his mouth opened like he wanted to say something, but nothing came out.

"Do you like it?" I asked. He just nodded, apparently still not able to speak.

I put my hands on his shoulders and pushed him back a bit. Then I went and straddled his lap. His breathing became heavier.

'I guess it's working then…'

I put my hands on his face and softly brushed my thumbs on his cheeks.

He still didn't speak. So I leaned in and kissed him softly.

The moment our lips touched, he moved his arms around my waist and pulled me closer to him.

It felt like heaven.

The kiss became more passionate and I opened my mouth to let his tongue in. His hands were now trailing up and down my waist, until they settled on my ass. As he pulled me more into his lap, I could feel he was just as turned on as me. He was hard, really hard.

I broke away from the kiss and looked into his eyes. They were glazed over. I bit my lip and pulled his face back to mine.

I started to grind into his lap and he responded by putting his hands on my hips and pushing me into him.

"Since this is our last night together, I wanted to try something different." I said.

I shouldn't have done that, because he froze and quickly pushed my off of his lap.

"What are you doing Bella?" he asked.

I just looked at him.

"Don't you want this?" I whispered.

He growled. "It would just be meaningless sex Bella. Can you handle that?"

I hesitated and he nodded in understanding. He stood up from the bed.

"We should just go to sleep. I think it's better for me to spend the night on the couch." He said, picked up a pillow from the bed and walked to the sitting area.

I started crying. This was not how it was supposed to go. I knew he didn't love me, but I was sure he was attracted to me. I couldn't believe how wrong I had been. He didn't want me. He just wanted sex.

I crawled into the bed and decided to leave as soon as he was asleep.

After half an hour his breathing was deep and heavy, so I got up, put on some clothes and silently made my way out of the room. I would have Alice or Rose pick up the rest of my things later on.

Epov

I lied.

It wouldn't have been meaningless sex. I had already admitted tomyself that I loved her. But that didn't change a thing.

I would not let myself let myself get down that road again. I wouldn't survive a next time.

I knew Bella and Tanya were nothing alike. They were perfect opposites actually. But I was too damaged, broken beyond repair.

It took a lot of willpower to push her away.

When I saw her in that red lacy thing, my mind went blank. I couldn't speak, all I did was stare.

And then she sat down on my lap and kissed me. Heaven. It was like nothing I ever felt before, not even with Tanya.

I had to touch her and I did.

I was ready to take things further, when she spoke.

The sound of her voice woke me up, and I realised what I was doing. So I pushed her off of me and asked what she was doing.

"Don't you want this?" she whispered.

I wanted to shout out that I did want this, that I wanted her. But I had to lie.

"It would just be meaningless sex. Can you handle that?"

I saw her hesitation and that was all I needed. I knew she wouldn't say yes to my question. She wasn't that kind of girl.

So I got up, said something about sleeping on the couch and left her in the bed.

Despite everything, I got to sleep really fast and when I woke up the next morning she was gone. And it hurt like hell.

A/N: fast update huh... the next chapter will be set a month later… and I promise some drama! I have already written most of it, so it won't take long for me to update again. Thanks to everyone who has already reviewed… you guys rock!!! Hope you enjoyed this chapter and again… please review…