Disclaimer: Harry Potter belongs to J.K. Rowling and Warner Bros. studios.
Monday 12 October – an ungodly hour- The Great Hall
Some days you're the dog; other days you're the hydrant.
Funny how I can't seem to remember ever being the dog.
Oh bollocks!
My picture perfect life -insert snort- is crumbling away. All because of Potter! I have not had one decent night's sleep since last Saturday. I have dreams about his arrogant face. My stomach flip-flops, then gurgles with nerves every time I see him. I've been avoiding him like the plague. What's more, I haven't written in over a week – I'm simply speechless. How often does that happen? Heh, NEVER!
That's why, at bloody 4:30 AM, I'm already in the Great Hall eating breakfast.
Ridiculous…. Potter! He was gentle, protective, and his hands were large and warm. They would certainly engulf mine if I were to hold them. At least I would never develop hypothermia.
Ooer. He's just a boy! An absolute tosser too! I don't even like him. Well, as more than a friend. Lily's friend.
Do I?
"Can't sleep?" A husky voice asked from the shadows.
I must have jumped, because I heard a low rumble of laughter. I wish the light from the jack-o'-lantern would have reached farther than the silver edges of my plate. I hate being caught unguarded and when my prat mind is in deep thought. Yes, it is quite deep. I don't think the intricate design on this plate is more complicated than the web I've spun in my mind.
Ooh how poetic…and wax. I am a sap.
At last I am no more of a sap than that batty knight and his fat pony. Really, the French Underground Bison Society? If I were him I'd…..
"Lee, are you okay?" Remus the Bludger emerged from the shadows.
I completely forgot he was there.
"Wotcher, Remus." I said and sloshed porridge into my mouth. Charming.
"I asked earlier if you couldn't sleep. You mustn't have heard me." He said with genuine concern as he sat opposite of me.
"Nope. I'm training to be a werewolf. They're semi-nocturnal you know."
It must be the lighting, because I swear Remus looks as if he's about to cry.
"I know." He said grimly.
"Are you training for werewolfdom too?" I asked before sipping some milk.
"I…uh…" he chuckled. "yeah."
I found myself laughing too. I have no clue what is so funny about werewolves, but this is an ungodly hour and I am Lily. Anything is possible.
"Just thinking of us as werewolves is foolish. How many stupid werewolves are there in the world anyways? Five? What wankers they must be." I finished with a laugh.
Remus sobered immediately. He got up and left the hall silently, immediately, and positively crestfallen.
Did I say something wrong?
I'm a terrible pessimist, but half the time people don't even notice and think I'm merely being happy-go-lucky - a pathetic interpretation if you ask me, but my dry and sarcastic humor usually goes straight over people's heads.
Why did Remus look so hurt this time? Together we've busted on others loads of times! Our sessions turn into a regular fireside chat; you know, guys' night out….but…without actually going out.
Werewolves….he must be related to one. Li-Lee! YOU DIMWIT!
Maybe I'm just not cut out to be a guy………………
Well of course I'm not. I am a girl! SHUT UP BRAIN!
I really should just stop thinking, take a vow of silence. I'll do a search spell for the nearest convent in which I can barricade myself from the world. I will become a turnip! I'll do less damage that way.
For the remainder of breakfast I ate quietly, and tried to think of nothing at all.
Before classes –
Technically I can still write, because writing is not speaking. Rotten luck chums and chum-ettes, you're not off the hook.
Defense Against the Dark Arts –
The vow of silence has been broken. Alice flooed smack-dab in the middle of Defense! I had to excuse myself to the loo, claiming I would empty my breakfast in Professor Littlefield's new pensieve. When Littlefield realized he could have the contents of my stomach for memories he quickly obliged.
I bum-rushed to the nearest bathroom.
Blimey! Urinals! Still not used to them. No place to sit down either.
I checked under the stalls for ditcher-boys smoking fags or actually using them for their intended purpose. Glad I didn't find anyone, because that would have been awkward. What do you say to someone when you barge in when they are pooing?
Find anything good in that newspaper?
……….
First thing tomorrow, I'm buying a new brain.
I was interrupted with shopping details when my compact made this farting noise. Alice must have an important message. The compact makes noises depending on the urgency of the message….which will get you excused from whatever you're doing faster.
I think I'll get rid of the farting noise though it is humorous. It's even more fun to make sounds with your armpit. Peter and Remus can do them beautifully.
Crikey. Lee is taking over.
"BLOODY HELL LILY! OPEN THE COMPACT!"
There's no need to get angry. I was pondering the mechanics of bodily functions.
"You know, if I wasn't standing in the boy's bathroom completely alone you would have blown my cover and I would be marched to an asylum for cross-dressing." I said dryly.
"So you've finally admitted that you are psycho and you are a cross-dresser?"
"No."
"Well you just did."
"Did Not!"
"I wish I had a recorder."
"Alice, why in the name of Merlin's knickers are you flooing during class hours?" I shrieked indignantly.
"Oh! Right then! Today during Divination, I had a premonition."
"Divination is absolutely codswallop and bollocks! I've always thought Arithmancy was much more reliable! Why do you still take Divination! Even I'm not stupid enough…."
"I didn't see-"
"Divination is the absolute worst subject. Here at Hogwarts where real students go, we don't waste time with stupid subjects like Divination."
"this in a crystal -" Alice tried to speak. But I really didn't want to hear what the next fab nail polish shade would be – shimmering diamond or pinecone gold.
"Why do even take Divination Alice? I had more respect for you than to take a class Charlotte takes. I hope you don't plan to be a Seer in your life because-"
"LILY ANNA EVANS! SHUT UP!"
Yes ma'am.
"I haven't even begun to explain anything yet! This isn't about the new nail polishes – shimmering diamond and pinecone gold though they are fab – this is about saving your neck like a good friend should! But now I hope you take a leap of faith, in the faith you don't survive, because you're ruined! You're turning into someone I don't know - you are becoming Lee. Lily would have never spouted what you just did! No offense, but I don't want Lee for a best friend!"
Think she has a point?
"I just flooed to tell you, I received a premonition via a letter from our mothers who will be arriving at Beauxbatons tomorrow for a conference with Le Dame. The post was late and didn't arrive until second class. Is divination phony now Miss-know-it-all!" Alice challenged.
KNOW-IT-ALL? She and Potter must have the same brain and a lot of nerve. I am no know-it-all!
Wait did she say….
my mother is coming….
to Beauxbatons? As in L'Académie des dames de Magie!
There's one problem with that - I am not there to meet her……
ACH SCHEISSE!
"Alice you are indeed a friend of the first water."
"That's not what you said earlier." Alice replied sourly.
"You win some, you loose some. I've got to see Dumbledore." I said. My adrenaline was flowing so furiously my ears could hear it pumping. My limbs turned to jelly and I felt as if I had recently developed Parkinson's disease.
Feels like Quidditch. Or Potter. Wait, cancel that last thought. Not Potter. NOT POTTER!
"What for?" Alice asked dumbly.
"my 'beautiful wand'."
Counting gargoyles, some corridor, and lost.
Was it this gargoyle, or one of the last twelve I passed?
Blimey O'Reilly.
To hell with the Fidelis Charm, hiding a room behind one of twelve gargoyles is enough to confuse anyone, especially Voldemort because we all know how little brain he has. He's a pureblood with ridiculous motives.
I smell lunch wafting from the Great Hall. Mmmm…chocolate.
I love chocolate. What girl doesn't?
My stomach grumbled. Ooer, I haven't eaten since 4:30 this morning.
"I know, I want chocolate frogs too." I whispered to it. Lordy, I hope no one would happen to be strolling along whilst I am speaking to my stomach to calm its rumbly nerves.
Suddenly, like magic, the fourth gargoyle leapt aside to reveal a narrow spiral staircase.
Score!
I plowed up the stairs and straight into Dumbedore's office where he….wasn't. I'll just wait then. Upon full entrance to the office, I noticed the red and gold phoenix perched on his stand. I always knew Dumbledore was a Gryffindor fan and may I add that he has made a fabulous choice of bird. The feathers were so soft, clean and in perfect order. I gently stroked it as it purred in bird language.
Birds can't purr but that's not the point here.
On top of that I was hearing voices as I pet the bird….phoenix!
I looked around. I was by myself as far as I knew. Yet I hear voices! I looked up to find a myriad of portraits scowling and muttering scornfully to each other behind their hands. Oh how subtle. I craned my neck and ears in hopes to return their subtlety and eavesdrop.
"Never! Never have I seen such scandal. Really!"
"The founders would have never allowed this!"
"How could Dumbledore have let this happen?"
"I've never dreamed they'd let so naïve and unworthy a student into these walls."
"The likes of her are not welcome here."
"It's pure irresponsibility!"
And….ouch. These portraits had to be talking about me. As far as I know, I'm the only 'she' in this building. I was sad, then angry; I've always been trusted by authority. Then some arse wipes who live in a picture frame for Merlin knows how long decide they're the experts? Well once I started, I couldn't force myself to stop.
"Just listen here you shreds of rotting old canvas! I have just as much capable brain power as the boys in this school. So what if I'm not a pureblood! There are oodles of people in this world who aren't pureblood and that does not make them any less human. We have right to everything purebloods do; I've grown tired of being treated like a kicked puppy because of my lineage and I will not have it from a bunch of dead men! Savvy?" I shrieked with wand at the ready.
They snickered.
It can't be good when pictures are laughing at you. When was the last time a portrait snickered to your face? This can't be a sign of sanity, but I wasn't in the mood to negotiate.
And then Dumbledore walked in.
Bugger! I would have ripped them off the wall and gorged their canvas with very sharp scissors.
Rereading that last line, I think I might be on the warpath to sociopath-osity.
Where was I?
Right. Dumbledore.
"Miss Evans, why are you holding my art under duress with your wand?" He looked innocently at me.
I suppose threatening ancient artwork with a long stick doesn't look very cultured.
Change of subject.
"Professor, I was wondering if I could talk to you about a...erm…field trip." I stuttered.
"Oh?"
So I explained everything there was to tell him. Since I couldn't gauge his reaction, I even spilled that Alice and Namie had been at the school for open house. The secrets were spilling out like word vomit and Professor Littlefield's pensieve was nowhere in sight.
"I see. When is your mother arriving?"
"Erm, tomorrow."
"Then it's best we…remedy this situation."
"You have a plan?"
Dumbledore rolled his eyes, smiled and winked. Then he said very forwardly, "I'm sorry to hear you're not feeling well Lee. I think you should take the day off tomorrow. By all means, take some of my FLUmedicine powder with you. I daresay it produces excellent results." He motioned towards a homey hearth in the far corner.
"Good day to you. I hope to see you feeling back to your old self in a few days."
He ushered me towards the fire, sprinkled his 'FLU MEDICINE POWDER' in the fire place and then shoved me in without warning.
Talk about being pushy.
And just like that I left Hogwarts behind. I left the Marauders, the purebloods, Potter, Remus, and all things I had been agonizing over behind. It felt foreign, and nice.
In a spiraling haze, Dumebledore's office and Hogwarts spun out of sight as I began spiraling towards Beauxbatons.
Aloha!
I'm aware that many of you are probably upset with me for letting this story go for two months before updating. I admit I was stuck with a slight writer's block for this chapter, and it shows. I did my share of procrastinating but my intent is to never abandon. I have also been forced to deal with a series of unfortunate events that have left me in a mood that is not productive for Little Lady.
I will earnestly write like a fiend on future Little Lady chapters now that I have overcome a difficult time in my life. I'm currently swamped with schoolwork as I'm leaving for Europe soon, but I will always keep writing. Thank you all for your support and encouraging reviews throughout this time.
Please feel free to comment. I love reading reviews, so make me happy!