Barb waited until Harper had all the paperwork signed before she approached Bobby with her deal. It was a simple decision, if he really wanted to go home, which she knew he did. When she brought him his late afternoon medicine, she sat down near his chair and waited for him to take it. He hadn't given her any more trouble about taking his medicine, and she knew it was because he was hurting...and the pain made him irritable.

"You need to eat your dinner."

"I'm not hungry."

"You will be once the pain subsides."

"You don't know that," he groused.

"Yes, I do." He looked away and she sighed, a gentle sound that soothed him a little bit. "Listen to me, Bobby. I have a proposition for you, if you're willing to take it."

He looked back at her, interested but suspicious. "What kind of proposition?"

"Dr. Harper has been tied up at NYU with two critically ill children. Today was the first day he was here in his office in almost a week and a half. I just spent the better part of an hour talking to him about letting you go home, and I finally got him to agree, but only under certain conditions."

His suspicion increased. "What conditions?"

"He has a couple of issues that I needed to reassure him about before he would agree. The biggest one is that he doesn't want you being home alone. He'll agree to an early discharge, but only if you have a nurse at home with you."

"A nurse? I don't need a damn baby sitter." He shook his head. "No. Eames can come by after work to check on me, and she'll stay for awhile. That's good enough."

His obstinacy frustrated her, but she held her ground. "Not for Dr. Harper, and it's his opinion that counts."

"Then I'll just sign myself out. I have that right. I don't need anyone watching over me."

She ignored his threat. "Suppose it was someone you trust?"

"I trust my partner. If I get into any kind of trouble, I can call her and she'll drop whatever it is she's doing. If I need her, she'll be there. She always is."

He recognized the frustration in her sigh, and he knew he was being difficult, but he wanted to go home and he wasn't happy with the doctor trying to put conditions on his release. With every passing day, he was getting more and more agitated which increased his irritability. He wished he felt better, and he wished it didn't hurt to breathe, but he felt that he would recover faster, with less risk of additional complications, if he could recuperate at home, where he felt comfortable and could relax. His inability to convince the doctor that he was making sense just fueled his frustration and he knew he had been taking that out on his nurses, particularly Barb, who had not taken a day off since he'd transferred to her unit and who dealt with his moods like she dealt with everything, with grace and patience.

"I know you put a lot of trust in Alex," Barb said reasonably. "And justifiably so. But she isn't going to be there with you all the time. You need someone closer than a phone call away." She paused. "Look at it this way, Bobby: you have two options. You can stay here for a few more weeks and keep intimidating my nurses and frustrating me or you can have one nurse stay with you at home until you've recovered enough to satisfy Dr. Harper that you're no longer at risk for the complications that concern him."

"Or I can just sign myself out and be done with it."

She walked to the chair and squatted beside it, looking up into his eyes and resting her hand on his arm with a heavy sigh. "Would you listen to me for a minute?"

He huffed in frustrated annoyance and waved his other hand in an impatient gesture. "I'm getting tired of talking, Barb."

She grabbed his hand and held it still, leaning in closer. His eyes shifted from her face to her hand, lingering for a moment in between before returning to her face. "Then just listen. Being at home alone involves more than just sitting on the couch waiting for Alex to come in and check on you. You still have to prepare your meals, take care of yourself, take your medicine, do your breathing exercises, not to mention routine household chores like laundry and dishes... There's a lot more involved that you are not thinking about. That's why Dr. Harper wants a nurse in place to care for you." She gently stroked the back of his hand and lowered her voice. "Bobby, he is not going to let you leave AMA...and neither will I. He has already ordered sedation if you refuse to cooperate. Do I have to tell you how much that will delay your recovery?"

His anger flared. "You won't let me..."

Her fingers touched his lips and silenced his outburst. "Exactly," she said softly. "I won't let you do anything that will cause you harm."

"But you'll sedate me and delay my recovery?"

"To keep from having to bury you? In a heartbeat."

"What do you mean?"

"Your obstinacy will kill you, you idiot. You seem to prefer overlooking the risks of leaving AMA."

He frowned. "I know the risks."

"Then stop acting stupid; I know better. I am offering you an acceptable alternative."

"Acceptable to who?"

She shook her head. "If you would just listen to me for two minutes...Normally, an agency takes care of assigning home nurses and you just deal with whoever they send out. I know how unsettling that would be for you..."

He was shaking his head, but he wouldn't look at her. "I don't like this at all. I don't need a damn nurse."

She closed her eyes, searching for patience. Her hand tightened on his. "Bobby, tell me what would happen if your lung collapsed again and you didn't have a chance to call Alex. She has been very supportive of your desire to go home. If anything happened to you because you were there alone..."

He turned to look at her with a violent snap of his head, eyes flashing. "Don't use my partner against me," he said in a low, dangerous voice.

She'd heard that tone before and it didn't phase her. Her own anger flared to meet his and she glared right back at him. "I'll use anything I can to make you see reason." She leaned back on her heels and released his hand. Again he looked away, unsettled by the disappointment that flared in him from her withdrawal. She let out another frustrated huff. "Please believe me when I say that I do want to see you get out of here as soon as you can. If there was someone home with you, we could discharge you in the near future, provided they could handle you. The major problem is that you live alone."

"And you think any nurse they send to babysit can do the job?"

"No, I don't. I don't even want to think about how many nurses we'd go through. That's why I talked Dr. Harper out of dealing with a home nursing agency."

"I, uh, I don't understand."

"You need someone to take care of you who is not intimidated by you." She hesitated, then offered, "Suppose I agreed to stay with you as your nurse?"

He stared at her in silence and blinked. "You? Why would you do that?"

"Because if I don't, one of two things will happen. Either you're going to leave AMA and possibly get yourself into trouble, or we're going to have to sedate you to keep you here. Guess which one it's going to be? Believe me, this is your best alternative. I will make sure you are properly cared for, and I'll be there if anything happens. Dr. Harper knows me. He knows I'll make you follow his orders, and he knows that you will continue to recover."

"My own medical Nazi..." he muttered.

His tone was annoyed, but she saw a glimmer of teasing in his eyes, and she smiled. "You've got that right. But you'll be in your own home and you'll sleep in your own bed."

"I have a one bedroom apartment."

"You'd be surprised at how comfortable I can make myself on a couch...and I am not a heavy sleeper. Just leave your bedroom door open and we'll manage just fine. Look, Bobby, you can take the offer or leave it. It's the only concession the doctor is going to make."

"So that's it? There's no other choice?"

"Nope. That's it. For the next few weeks it's either me or these four walls."

He had to admit, she was more interesting to look at than the blank walls that surrounded them. Given a choice, he would much rather watch her. And if he started talking to the walls, they'd probably panic. He sighed heavily, stifling a groan that was triggered by the pain that flared in his chest, but he did not answer. "This is ridiculous," he finally muttered, still angry.

She understood how much he hated being told what he could or could not do, and putting these conditions on his release really made him angry, but his reluctance hurt her, though she tried to hide it from him. Knowing how much he wanted to go home, she could find no reason for his resistance to the idea. "Look, I promise I won't interfere with your life. I will just be there to make sure you continue to heal well. I'll take care of you and make sure you don't do anything stupid, and then I'll be gone."

He frowned. Gone? When she promised not to interfere with his life, his irritation flared. Just by being there, telling him what to do, she would be interfering. But before he could snap at her, she said she'd be gone, and he swallowed a moment of panic. He knew what it was like, having her there and then having her gone, and he'd hated it. "I, uh, I didn't mean it like that. I, um, I..."

Words resolutely fled from his mind and he had no clue how to say what he had meant. He was angry at Harper for putting any conditions on his right to leave the hospital, not at Barb for being willing to subject herself to him for a few more weeks so that he could go home. After what had happened between them, how could he tell her that he wanted her in his life? But then, how could he explain the distance he had put between them? There was no way he could possibly explain it and not come off sounding like a total ass. He had always tried to protect himself from pain at the hands of others, building walls around his heart that were nearly impossible to breach. As it was, his mother and his partner were the only ones in his life capable of getting past those walls...unless he counted Barb. She had walked away from him, and that had hurt him deeply. Now, here he was, approaching a point where he no longer cared about that...he was willing to risk being hurt again, something he had never done before, because he still...God help him, he was still in love with her and he couldn't get away from that. But he was at a loss for words to explain what he meant and how he felt... "Just...never mind...uh, what about Marcus?"

"Don't worry about him. My neighbor will take care of Marcus, and he likes her."

His mind was swimming. Why the hell would she do this? Unless... all it was to her was another job. He had no indication that he meant anything more to her than any other patient did. Just another job... "Before I agree to this, I want you to answer my first question."

"What question is that?"

"Why would you do this?"

"I did answer you. I don't want you signing yourself out and possibly getting into serious trouble, and I certainly don't want to have to sedate you for the next few weeks."

"That isn't what I meant. I don't want a medical reason. I want to know your motivation."

She crossed her arms over her chest, and he read that as subconscious defensiveness. She meant it to convey her annoyance. "Is it so hard for you to believe that I care about you?"

It was...and it wasn't. But he had no idea how to answer that question, and that added to his irritation. Raising his hands, he snapped, "What proof of that do I have?"

She knew what he was doing, trying to distance himself some more, but it still hurt. "Fine. I don't trust anyone else to take care of you. I just want to see you recover completely so you can get back to your life and I can get back to mine. Is that the answer you wanted, Bobby?"

It wasn't, and he was caught offguard by the power of his response to it. "Barb..."

She shook her head, no longer able to hide the fact that he'd hurt her. "Just forget it, Bobby. So what will it be: yes or no?"

"I'm sorry, Barb," he said softly. "I...I didn't mean it like that. I...I just..."

"Just answer me, okay? What do you want me to do?"

What a loaded question that was... "I-I'll accept your offer," he said softly. "And I am sorry."

She nodded, but he wasn't sure if she accepted his apology. "I'll go and get your clothes."

She started to stand, but he grabbed her arm. With a wince, he leaned closer to her. "I mean it."

"Forget it." She stood up and gently pulled her arm from his grasp. Letting her fingertips lightly graze his cheek, she turned and left the room.

He swore to himself. Why was he being an ass to her? Why? Because he was afraid. Like his partner, Barb wasn't much more than a wisp of a woman, but she was a mountain of attitude and she was not afraid to stand up to him. Crossing her was the wrong thing to do, he knew from experience. If he went through with this, she would sleep on his couch and make certain he rested, ate well, did his respiratory exercises—dammit—and he would recover completely. Whatever his choice, Barb would be close by, at least for a while, but being alone with her, in his apartment...he struggled with his reaction. On one hand, it would be nice to not be alone for a change, at least for a little while. But on the other hand...he closed his eyes. That was where his fear came in. He was afraid of being hurt again...and yet...he did not understand his willingness to open himself up to that pain again. In his mind's eye, he could see her, sitting across from him that last night he saw her, smiling and looking...like she did. Until that damn phone call, everything was fine. A small smile touched his lips as he recalled her laughter and the way her eyes lit up when she looked at him. He could see a remnant of that light when she smiled at him, and he thought that maybe, just maybe, she was willing to take the same risk he was...and he swore he was going to put that light back in her eyes...