CHAPTER TEN

~In Which The Narrative Switches To Diesel's Point of View~

Hello everyone! My name is Prince Diesel, and Carlos wanted me to share my side of the story!

So, I ran down the hall with Gandalf, growling ferociously as I went. The corridors were made of dark stone, and a thick stench of death lingered throughout the castle. Eventually, we reached the very top of the castle. The Dark Lord Sauron stood there, though certainly not as menacing as his literary or film appearances.

He turned around to look at us, his eyes burning with intense hatred. "You fools! You desire to die do you then u shal die!"

I lunged at him while Gandalf attacked with his magic blasts. "Use! Better! Sentence! Structure!" I barked while chomping on his leg. He kicked me off and reflected Gandalf's magic blasts back at him.

"You foolish fools!" Sauron said. "NOW FELL TRU POWUUUUUUUR!"

Egregious Dark Lord

Sauron

Sauron raised his hands forward, summoning from a burst of flame his sword, inscribed with words in the Black Speech. His eyes burned with great hatred as he lunged towards Gandalf, who used his staff and sword to fight him off. Since my bites weren't harming him, I decided to start using my healing powers on Gandalf.

I stood on my back legs, doing a sort of dance as my body began glimmering in grey light, slowly changing to green as I danced. A portal appeared before me on the ground, green and black in color, releasing a small fairy that span around Gandalf, healing his wounds and weariness.

"Thank you bunches!" said Gandalf.

"Anytime," I barked.

As the two fought, I continued casting my healing magic on Gandalf periodically. He seemed to be enjoying the fight, almost having fun during it.

Minutes passed when Gandalf said, "I wish Frodo and Merry and Pippen and Sam was here."

"I doubt four hobbits would be of much use," I barked.

Suddenly, a sword appeared out of nowhere, floating in midair beside Gandalf. A voice came from the sword, which said "Some wished us here."

"Frodo Baggins why you doing here," Gandalf said to the sword.

My mind nearly broke from this. Somehow, Gandalf had unwittingly conjured Frodo in the form of a sword inexplicably. I could hardly comprehend the writing of this fanfiction - wait, let me rephrase that: I could not, in the very slightest, comprehend what was going on in this utterly mad story.

"We came to help you and also we got rid of the ring," Frodo said from inside the sword.

"Oh no," Sauron said, completely deadpan.

Gandalf then lifted his staff and cast a powerful spell at Sauron, causing him to explode! The explosion was Hollywood, however, and wasn't even very large.

After this, Carlos, Strdier, Legolas, and Laura ran into the room. Laura was naked and bloodied, wearing nothing but Strdier's cape.

"Woah!" I barked loudly. "What happened here?"

"Don't ask," Carlos said, covered in orc blood - I could tell by its smell.

And so, we started to return to Milkwood from Mondor.