Hello, all. Sorry I haven't updated in so long. Poetry project...

Anyway, I tried fitting in another rape scene between Hidan and Kakashi, but I failed. I have plans for Hidan later; him raping people might compromise the situation. Maybe in another story. Though there will probably be some torture/rape in the next few chapters. You've been warned.

A few months later...

"Psst."

"Kakashi."

"Hey."

Jab.

"Psst."

... "GET UP!!!"

Kakashi bolted upward. He hastily grabbed for the sheets but failed. He pulled a pillow over his lap, then grabbed a kunai to throw at the intruder. Deidara peeked over the sheets he now held, gaping at the naked Copy nin. He dodged the flying kunai and ran laughing out the door, taking the sheets with him. Kakashi could hear him yelling through the hallway, "Itachi, you're boyfriend's friggin hot!" Kakashi lazily pulled his clothes on after finding them scattered across the floor. His two roomates had already left. He walked downstairs expecting a mission; usually no one woke him otherwise. But, to his surprise, he was met by Deidara shoving a bowl of ramen into him.

"Eat up, Kashi! We're going to leave pretty soon, un." The blonde raced off, only to be replaced by Tobi who pushed the Copy nin into the kitchen. Kakashi took a seat at the kitchen table along with Itachi, Sasori, Pein, and Hidan. Pein wasn't eating, as always, only having a cup of tea. Itachi boredly picked at his ramen. Hidan and Sasori were arguing about who was more immortal, as if it mattered. Deidara and Tobi were rushing the others as if the end of the world was about to happen and they wanted front row seats. It would've amusing if it wasn't so damn early. Kakashi didn't take long to eat, else the consequences would be dire. He didn't even have the time to ask where they were going. He'd find out soon enough.

Deidara dragged Itachi and Kakashi by the wrists to the lounge. Tobi followed with Hidan, using the Jashin symbol he had stolen as a bribe. Kisame was already waiting in the lounge, passing out hats to the others. Deidara and Tobi were the first out the front door, all smiles. The rest followed, still half asleep. They went straight through the forest to the main road and headed for the Land of Fire. Alone, they looked just like any other schmucks passing by. They talked about trivial nonsense or played roadside games to amuse themselves. But among passing villagers they always held that ominous temperament, almost daunting the very atmosphere by their presence, in true Akatsuki custom. It was almost nice. No one bothered them. They were too busy running away.

Colorful lights, large banners, and half-naked women all plagued the city of Otafuku Gai. People swarmed the streets and venues, happily cheering for the annual festival that hadn't even started yet. The buildings were overcrowded and undergaurded. Sake from stories up rained on the streets below. The people always cheered for more. It was evil incarnate. The effervescent facade masked the dark alleys and the perils which they held. Malevolence lurked around every corner, ever ready to reap the rewards of crime, caring less about the naive victims it came across. Only in such a pandemonium could Akatsuki members and murderers alike roam freely; shinobis were too enthralled in party life to pay them mind. It was paradise.

Deidara found them all a hotel to stay in. Unfortunately, there was only one room left, so they had to share or sleep outside, which wasn't uncommon during the festival. After that, they dispersed. Deidara and Tobi went straight to the dango shop and only left to use the bathroom. Kakashi followed Itachi around like a lost puppy, then regretted it when the Uchiha led him right into a women's dressing room and fucked him senseless. The store owners weren't nearly as amused as some of the customers. Kisame and Hidan decided to come to terms with their religious differences and appease the drinking gods by heading to the nearest kegger. They had fun, to say the least, and would brag about the adventure continuously when they returned home.

As agreed, they all met at the dango shop before the parade. Kisame and Hidan stumbled in after Kakashi and Itachi. They were starting to get drunk already, but their night was far from over. As was their morning... They sat around the wooden table that Tobi and Deidara currently occupied. Tobi looked like he was going to be sick from eating so many dangos, which were now being forced fed to him by Deidara. Tobi had made the foolish mistake of ordering the fifty dango challenge, and he wasn't even close to fifty. He had made an even bigger mistake by not bringing any money, forcing Deidara to pay for the desert if he couldn't finish it. Kakashi almost regretted stealing Deidara's former partner.

Itachi tightened his hand around the cup of tea, nearly breaking it. "Someone's looking for us."

'How am I supposed to focus on the mission with all these pretty ladies?!' The legendary sannin smiled to himself, nosebleed erupting in comical fashion. He knew he was heading for the dango shop, but he took his time getting there, just as long as his subjects didn't leave. How could a lecherous, old sage resist? He reasoned he should stay the night in the city. To keep an eye on the Akatsuki, of course...

Although, as he neared the shop, the festival seemed a little less cheery. There were six. Six S-rank criminals were in one small shop, and they knew he was coming. Even if he was a sannin, he'd be killed if they decided he was a threat. Despite his warrior's intuition screaming protests, he pushed back the banner hanging in the entry and boldly went in.

He flashed a huge grin in a skewed effort to deflect their penetrating glares. The sight was unnerving, but he kept his calm. "Well, isn't it our favorite criminal organization? What a small world. I never expected to see you here..." He took a moment to see who he was up against. He immediately noticed one as Kisame; the blue man was hard to miss, even with a straw hat to hide his face. The one next to him was Itachi, emotionless as always. The blonde, Deidara, raised an eyebrow at him. Hidan completely ignored him. The most unusual, Tobi, had his arms wrapped tightly around his stomach. Jiraiya didn't even bother hiding his confusion when he saw the masked man. And, of course, Kakashi was desperately avoiding his gaze, hiding behind Itachi.

"So you're Master Jiraiya?" Deidara smirked. "What brings you here? Besides trying to hunt us down, un..."

Jiraiya took a seat next to the table. "What? Trying to find you? I just came for the beautiful women!" The lies ...half-truths... were lined with sarcasm to lighten the mood.

"Bull shit, old man!" Hidan spat out. "Quit wasting our time. Unlike you, I can actually get a woman..."

"WHAT?! Who are you calling old man?!" Jiraiya quickly bit his lip and took a second to calm down.

He chuckled and smiled again. "Well, I did want to discuss a few things." He pulled up a chair from a neighboring table. He grabbed for the small piece of cloth and threw it on the table. "Look familiar?" Kisame grinned sheepishly and quickly took the missing piece to his cloak. "Snagged a twig?"

Jiraiya rolled his eyes. "I don't even want to know what you were doing near Konoha." He paused, noticing Kisame's sigh of relief. "But, we were a little concerned about the number of Sound ninja that were intruding on our land, the same that were apprehended by you." He leaned in to avoid any eavesdropping. Can't be too cautious. "Allies from renegade Sound shinobi say Orochimaru is planning an attack. They're only rumors, but I wouldn't put it past him to pull something like this, especially after the incident a few months ago. Have you heard anything?"

Itachi and Deidara shot each other a decisive look, then Itachi turned to Jiraiya. "...No. But we'll have Zetsu investigate, if you wish."

Jiraiya sighed. The sannin's expression was hard to read, but Itachi recognized it as a bad omen, a premonition of perils. "I don't think that would be wise. We have reason to believe Orochimaru is trying to get rid of the competition."

Itachi's eyes softened, and he unfurrowed his eyebrows from his usual scowl. He almost looked afraid. But it was gone in an instant.

Jiraiya continued. "I don't know what caused the sudden change in plans. But I do know that once the Akatsuki is out of the way, he'll come for Konoha."

Hidan looked at the old sage, confusion playing across his face. "Why so nice, Pervy Sage? Why not let Dr. Frank N. Furter fuck us up the ass so you won't have to deal with us?"

Jiraiya shrugged. "Lesser of two evils." He sighed again, this time the expression read defeat. "We're willing to compromise in exchange for information, even help, from you."

Deidara smiled. "What kind of exchange?" he asked after shoving two more dangos down Tobi's throat.

"A pardon." Jiraiya looked as if it hurt to speak the words. "And a peace treaty ... in Konoha at least." He then gave the group a stern, almost parental look, adding, "But don't think that means you're free to do whatever you want. The treaty is only valid if you keep your noses clean. And you have to prove useful, of course."

Deidara and Itachi exchanged glances again. They both nodded in apparent agreement, then Itachi said, "We'll have to speak with Leader first, of course. But it is unlikely that we will deny."

Jiraiya grinned. "Get back to me soon. Who knows when our old friend will strike us down." The sannin left, not forgetting to give Kakashi a solemn nod as he walked away.

The six sat in silence, waiting for Jiraiya to stop spying on them, which wasn't hard considering how distracted he was everytime a female walked by. Deidara gave up on Tobi and threw a few coins on the counter. They left quickly, despite Hidan and Kisame's protests.

The walk home seemed infinitely long for Itachi. Dread was overbearing him. His eyebrows furrowed into an unflinching scowl as he stared broodingly at the dirt path.

Kakashi was surprised when the Uchiha claimed his hand and refused to let go. The fact that his boyfriend was walking with him hand in hand -- and in public, no less -- should've sent his heart skipping with excitement. But the cold, almost possesive grip made him uneasy. The sudden shift in mood didn't help either; even Tobi seemed depressed. It may have been his aching stomach, but that was beside the point.

They finally arrived at the hidden building known as Akatsuki headquarters. Kakashi was relieved to be free of the tense, awkward silence that plagued the walk home. The relief didn't last long; they all walked straight into Pein's office.

The red head looked up from some papers. "Ever heard of knocking?"

"Sorry, Leader-sama," Deidara said quickly. "But this is important." Deidara bit his lip to restrain the words, waiting for Pein to reply. Pein always decided if it was 'important'.

Pein raised an eyebrow. He quickly observed the group, noticing Itachi's protective grasp on Kakashi. "... I'm listening."

"Orochimaru is coming for Kakashi-kun," Deidara spat out before he could stop himself.

Kakashi stepped back, shocked. Though, he didn't make it far; Itachi pulled him right back to his side, safe.

Deidara continued, "We need to hide him now!"

Pein raised a hand to silence the blonde. "We knew this could happen. You know where to take him?"

Deidara nodded.

Kakashi panicked. "Where?! What's going on?"

Pein glanced at the Copy nin. "... I suppose..."

"We don't have time!" Deidara said outraged.

"He needs to hear this," Pein replied calmly. He turned back to Kakashi. "Orochimaru was planning to kidnap you for his own benefits, which is why it was necessary for you to be under our care for the time being."

Kakashi mentally kicked himself. The Akatsuki already had obvious talent. Why did they need him? But he was still confused about one thing. "Why would Orochimaru want me so badly? And how would that concern you enough to go through all this trouble to get me?" His voice was getting louder and filled with anger as he went along.

"Orochimaru considers you Plan B." Pein glanced at Itachi for a moment. "Or rather, Plan C... Should Sasuke decide to revolt, like we think he will, Orochimaru would have you as a backup to ensure sharingan. Even if the boy remains loyal, he'll have you to join the Sound 4."

Kakashi glared at the pierced man. "And why do you care?"

"The curse mark will increase your chakra, therefore you'll be able to use the sharingan at a level equal to Itachi. When Orochimaru has acquired your full cooperation, he'll attack us. And win. Not to mention, the only reason Orochimaru has not made any attempts to attack thus so far is because he doesn't know where we are. You do, thanks to Jiraiya."

"So he'll use me to find you," Kakashi interjected.

"Exactly." Pein turned to Deidara. "You know what to do."

With that, the six left the room and seperated. Deidara left with Tobi to find Sasori. Itachi, still securing Kakashi's hand to his own, nearly dragged the Copy nin outside. He pressed Kakashi up against the wall and touched his lips to his lover's, their tongues entertwining for a mere moment before Itachi broke the kiss. Kakashi's gaze met his, the Copy nin's eyes full of sorrow and confusion.

Itachi ran his hand along Kakashi's smooth, maskless cheek. "I love you."

Kakashi tried to replied but choked on words. Itachi looked scared; that fact terrified Kakashi.

"Promise me you'll be safe, Kashi."

Kakashi hesitated. He finally found the will to speak, though the words were barely above a whisper. "I ... I promise."

The door flew open, revealing Sasori, Deidara, and Tobi. Sasori walked up to the two. "Sorry, Itachi. But we need to go."

Itachi nodded quietly and let Kakashi by. Kakashi followed Sasori and the others through the forest. He looked back at the hideout, seeing the rest of the members now all outside. He missed it... He missed Itachi.