Disclaimer: I don't own Glee. All rights go to RIB and Fox. I also don't own any of the songs these one shots are based off, all rights go to Taylor Swift.
A/N: In this one shot it is the summer before Finn and Rachel's freshman year of high school. Finn has just moved to Ohio with his mother. His father is still alive but is stationed at a Marine Corps base in California.
"When you think Tim McGraw, I hope you think my favourite song
The one we danced to all night long
The moon like a spotlight on the lake
When you think happiness, I hope you think that little black dress
Think of my head on your chest and my old faded blue jeans
When you think Tim McGraw…I hope you think of me"
-Tim McGraw, Taylor Swift
Chapter 10: I hope you think of me
First meeting
"Dad! Daddy! There's a moving van outside" I yell excitedly when I see the van pull up to the house next door. It used to be a really old couple who lived next door to us but they've moved to a retirement home. I'm hoping that whoever lives there now will have kids my age because most of the people who live in my area are couples without kids-I mean I have my friends from middle school, but it would be nice to have a friend who lived right next door to me.
My dads join me at the kitchen window to see the moving van. "Rach you really should….." my dad says but I have already run out of the house before he's finished his sentence. I know he was going to tell me to wait to introduce myself until they had moved all their stuff into their new house, but I'm really excited to meet them and I can't wait that long. I run straight into someone carrying a box causing them to drop it and the contents to spill all over the floor.
My cheeks flush bright red and I look down, embarrassed. "I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to make you drop your box" I say.
"Don't worry about it, there's nothing breakable in here" the person says. We both bend down to start picking up stuff that's fallen out of the box and reach for the same object.
"It's okay, I'll get it" the voice says. I finally look up to see exactly who it is that I'm talking to. It's a boy, not to mention a very attractive boy with warm brown eyes and an adorable smile.
"Hi" I say.
"Hi. I'm Finn Hudson" he says.
"Rachel Berry. I don't usually run into people I don't know" I say laughing a little.
"I didn't think you did but I wouldn't judge, I'm the clumsiest person ever. Where were you going in such a hurry?" he asks.
"To meet you" I say shyly.
"Are you trying to flirt with me?" he asks smiling.
"No, that wasn't a pick up line. I live next door and I wanted to meet the new neighbours-I guess I got kind of overexcited" I say.
"That is so cute" he says.
"Really? I thought you would think it was creepy" I say.
"Nah, it's cute. You're cute" he says.
"Really?" I ask blushing.
"Yeah" he says.
"How old are you?" I ask.
"Fifteen, I'm starting high school in September. You?" he asks.
"Fourteen but I'll be starting high school in September too. I'm fifteen in December. What brings you to Ohio?" I ask.
"My family comes from Ohio but my dad's in the marines so we've moved around a lot. My mom wants me to stay in one place for high school so we've moved back here but who knows if that will last" he says sounding ever so slightly bitter.
"Has it not been exciting moving around to different places?" I ask.
"Not really, I've mainly been living in places in California and there's only so much beach you can take before you get tired of it" he says.
"Is it only California you've lived in then?" I ask.
"No, we've lived in Hawaii, Virginia and Washington DC as well" he says.
"Which one's been your favourite?" I ask.
"Virginia, definitely. We only stayed there for a year though which was a shame since I made some really good friends at my school" he says.
"Would you like to come out with me and my friends? I could introduce you to some people before school starts" I say.
"That would be great, thanks Rachel" he says.
"Well I'd better go, I think my dads will have made dinner" I say turning to leave.
"Wait, Rach" he says.
"What?" I ask.
"Would you like to come have dinner with us?" he asks.
"Would your mom mind?" I ask.
"Nah, she loves having people over. We don't have any food yet so it will have to be takeaway, is that okay?" he asks.
"Sounds great, just let me text my dads to tell them what I'm doing" I say, quickly texting my dads. I follow him into the house, where his mom is unpacking boxes in the kitchen.
"Finn did you bring….." his mom says but trails off when she sees me. "Hello" she says.
"Hi, I'm Rachel Berry, I live next door" I say.
"Carole Hudson, I'm Finn's mom. I was expecting him to bring the last of the boxes in, not a girl" she says laughing slightly.
"I came over to introduce myself and Finn invited me in for dinner. I hope that's okay" I say feeling a little awkward now.
"It's not a problem sweetheart. I hope you don't mind Chinese food" she says.
"I love Chinese" I say.
"Finn will you go get the menus and we can order some food?" she asks.
"When did you have time to get takeout menus?" he asks.
"A new house gift from the previous owners" Carole says smiling.
"Awesome" Finn says. He leaves me and Carole alone whilst he goes to get the takeout menus.
"How old are you Rachel?" she asks.
"I'm fourteen" I reply.
"Just a little younger than Finn then" she says.
"Yeah, I know" I say.
"He must really like you" she says.
"What makes you say that?" I ask, trying very hard not to blush.
"He's never brought a girl home to meet me before. Actually I'm pretty sure you're the first girl he's ever brought home period" she says.
"I find that hard to believe" I say.
"Believe it or not it's true" she says. We stand in silence for a few moments and then Finn returns with the menus.
"What did you guys talk about when I was gone?" he asks.
"You" Carole and I say.
"Tell me you didn't tell her any embarrassing stories from when I was a kid" Finn says.
"I was just getting to those" Carole says ruffling Finn's hair. His cheeks turn bright red.
"Please don't Mom" he says.
"How about you tell me about your time in Virginia?" I ask.
"Virginia?" Carole says.
"Yeah, Finn said that Virginia was his favourite place that you guys lived, I'd like to hear about it" I say.
"I think I have some pictures in one of the boxes, give me a few minutes and I'll go find them" Carole says before disappearing out to the moving van.
"Thanks for that" Finn says.
"I'll be expecting to hear those embarrassing stories at some point though" I say.
"I'll save those until you know me better" he says.
"I look forward to it" I say.
I spend the rest of the evening looking at photos of a young Finn, eating Chinese and laughing with Finn and Carole. I can't stop thinking about what Carole said about Finn really liking me earlier. I hope she's right, because I think I really like him.
"I've had a really great time tonight but I have to go, it's getting late" I say.
"I'll walk you back home" Finn says.
"It's okay, I can walk back myself-my house is only next door" I say.
"I insist" he says.
"Thank you, that's very nice of you" I say.
"It was nice to meet you Mrs Hudson" I say, standing up.
"It was nice to meet you too Rachel but please call me Carole, Mrs Hudson makes me feel old" she says.
"Okay, Carole" I say and she gives me a hug.
"I expect I'll be seeing you again very soon" she says.
"I hope so" I reply. Finn holds the door open for me.
"That's very chivalrous of you Finn" I say walking through.
"Is that a good thing?" he asks making me laugh.
"Yes" I say. We walk to my house together and I unconsciously take his hand. He looks a little surprised, as am I, but he doesn't let go until we reach the steps leading up to my house.
"Goodnight Finn" I say.
"Goodnight Rach" he says. I turn and walk up the steps to my house and I'm about to open the door when I hear him calling my name.
"What?" I ask.
"Would you like to go out with me sometime?" he asks.
"Like on a date?" I ask.
"Yeah, like on a date" he says.
"I'd love to" I say.
"Really?" he asks excitedly.
"Yes, really. When?" I ask.
"Friday night? I'll pick you up here at 7" he says.
"Pick me up? You're only fifteen, you can't drive without an adult in the car" I say.
"I have a fake ID that says I'm twenty one" he says.
"It's illegal, I'm not comfortable with this" I say.
"I have a real learner's permit too and I'm insured to drive in my mom's car. It will be totally safe, I won't speed or anything and most people think I'm older than fifteen anyway because I'm so tall" he says.
"Have you ever been caught?" I ask.
"No, because I never do anything stupid enough to get pulled over" he says.
"Where are we going that means you need to drive?" I ask.
"Now that would ruin the surprise wouldn't it?" he says smiling that cute smile of his.
"I don't like surprises" I say.
"You'll like this one, trust me" he says.
"I hope so. You only just moved to Ohio, are you sure you know where you're going?" I ask.
"You forget that I was born here-we moved when I was ten but I still remember some of my favourite childhood haunts" he says.
"Well I look forward to seeing where you take me" I say.
"See you Friday?" he says.
"See you then" I reply. I watch him walking back over to his house before I close the door to my own.
"Did you have a nice time sweetheart?" my dad asks.
"Yeah I did. Finn and his mom are really nice. I'm going out with Finn on Friday, is that okay?" I ask.
"Sure sweetie, as long as you're not back too late" Dad says.
"I won't be, thank you dad" I say.
"Are you going to tell us more about this Finn who's taking you out on a date?" Daddy asks.
"He's sweet Daddy I promise. He and his mom just moved from California, where his dad is based with the marines" I say.
"And he asked you out even though he only just met you?" my dad asks sceptically.
"He likes me Dad, and I like him. He's not using me and he's not trying to hurt me" I say.
"When are we going to get to meet this boy?" Daddy asks.
"Whenever you want, I've already met his mom" I say.
"How about when he comes to pick you up on Friday?" Dad suggests.
"I don't want to freak him out on our first date" I say apprehensively.
"I have an idea-why don't we invite Finn and his mother over for dinner on Saturday? That way it won't be as awkward for Finn as it would be if it was the two of us, you and him" Daddy says.
"That actually doesn't sound like a bad idea. I'll ask him when I see him tomorrow" I say.
"What are you doing tomorrow?" Dad asks.
"Finn and I are going bowling with the rest of my friends" I say.
"But you hate bowling" Daddy says.
"I know, but Finn loves bowling and since he's new back here we should remind him where to do the things he likes" I say.
"What do you mean, he's new back here?" Dad asks.
"He was born here, his family lived here until he was ten and then his dad was transferred to a base in Virginia" I say.
"So he's moved around a lot then?" Dad asks.
"Yes, mainly around California" I say.
"Are you sure you should be getting so attached to this boy Rachel? It doesn't seem like he's been staying in one place for long in the last few years" Dad says.
"He's here for high school, that's the whole reason his mom moved them back. So he wouldn't have to move around a lot during high school" I say.
"We just don't want you getting hurt if he has to leave sweetheart" Dad says.
"Will you stop? We haven't even been on our first date yet. Let's get past that before you talk about him leaving" I say.
"Sorry, darling. We're glad you've found someone you like, we are" Dad says.
"Good. Can we watch a movie tonight?" I ask.
"Sure princess, what do you want to watch?" Dad asks.
"West Side Story?" I suggest. It's one of my favourite musicals and the film version of it is pretty good.
"Sounds great" Daddy says. I put the movie into the DVD player and then curl up on the sofa in between my dads. I try to concentrate during the film but all I can think about is Finn and how much I am looking forward to our date on Friday. It can't get here soon enough
Friday
All week I have been looking forward to my date with Finn but now it's here I can't help but feel a little nervous. I shouldn't be, since Finn and I have been hanging out every day since we met but I am. I'm worried that he won't like me as more than just a friend because I know that I like him a lot.
My entire wardrobe covers my floor. It's taken me forever to choose an outfit, and I've ended up with the first outfit that I tried on. I'm wearing a short black dress and small black heels. Finn seems like the sort of guy who would appreciate a girl who dresses more simply than someone who wears flashy clothes to impress him so I thought he'd like me in this outfit. It's almost seven so I take one last look in the mirror to check my outfit.
I hear the doorbell ring, signalling that Finn has arrived. I run down the stairs, almost tripping on my heels in the process to get to the door.
"Finn's here, I'll be back later" I call to my dads in the kitchen.
"Not too late! Back by midnight remember" Daddy says.
"I promise Daddy, goodbye" I say.
"Have a great night sweetheart" Dad calls.
"I will" I say. I open the door to Finn. His mouth drops open when he sees me which I take as a good sign.
"Do you like it?" I ask referring to my outfit.
"You look gorgeous. I feel underdressed" he says.
"You look great too" I say. Finn is wearing a simple button down shirt and blue jeans which really suit him. If it's possible, he looks even more gorgeous than I remember.
"Thanks. Shall we depart Miss Berry?" he asks.
"We shall, Mr Hudson" I say. He takes my hand and leads me out to his car.
"You drive a Chevy?" I ask.
"Well it's my mom's car so technically my mom drives a Chevy. Why?" he asks.
"Nothing, I just didn't take you for someone who'd drive a Chevy truck" I say.
"Well there's a lot you don't know about me" he says.
"I look forward to finding out" I say. Finn opens my door for me and helps me into the car before getting in the driver's side.
"So where are we going?" I ask excitedly.
"It's still a surprise. You'll find out when we get there" Finn says. I feel a little frustrated because I want to know where we are going, but seeing the stubborn look on Finn's face, I can tell that he's not going to tell me. He switches the car radio on, probably to stop me from asking more questions. It works, as instead of asking him questions, we both sing along to the radio. Finn actually has a really nice voice, sure it's not as well trained as mine but he definitely has a raw talent.
About forty minutes into our drive, the car engine starts to sputter. "That's not supposed to happen is it?" I ask.
"Definitely not" Finn says. The car carries on for a while longer with the engine rattling, until it shudders to a stop.
"We've broken down haven't we?" I ask.
"Yeah" Finn says.
"What the hell are we going to do?" I ask.
"Don't panic, we'll just call a tow truck and then go and find somewhere to eat" he says.
"Hold off on the tow truck" I say.
"Why? We haven't even got to where our date was supposed to be yet" he says.
"I know but if we're going to get a tow truck, we may as well just call for one after our date and get towed home rather than getting towed to wherever our date was supposed to be and then having to call another one to get towed home" I say.
"That makes sense. I'll just use my GPS to find out where we are" he says.
"We're in Sidney" I say.
"How do you know that?" he asks.
"I saw the sign a couple of miles back. Besides which if you look outside…" I say pointing towards the lake.
"Tawawa Lake. This is perfect" he says. He gets out of the car, and then opens my door to help me out. He grabs a picnic basket from the back of the car and we walk hand in hand, over to the lake. He places the picnic blanket on the floor and hands me a covered plate.
"My mom made it, don't worry" he says when he sees me looking at the food suspiciously. Finn had attempted to cook me dinner earlier this week and to say it was a disaster would be an understatement! Somehow he managed to both burn and undercook our dinner, I've never known anyone who's managed to do that before.
I dig in, wrapping the spaghetti round my fork. "This is delicious; your mom is an amazing cook!" I say smiling.
"I know. If I didn't play football, I would probably be seriously overweight by now" he says making me laugh.
"If you got to eat your mom's food all the time, I think it might just be worth it" I say eating some more spaghetti.
"You may be right" Finn says licking his lips.
"Have you heard from your dad this week?" I ask. I know this is a bit of a sore subject for Finn, but my curiosity got the better of me, and besides I think he might need someone to talk to about these things since he has some unresolved issues with his dad.
"He called two days ago. He and mom had a raging row because he wants us to move back to California with him, and mom doesn't want to. Dad and I didn't have much to talk about, except football and you" he says.
"And me?" I ask.
"Yeah, I told him about you. I said that I had met the most gorgeous, funny, smart girl who lives in the house next door and that I was completely crazy about her. It was nice to talk to him about something other than football for once. Besides that, we don't have much in common" he says.
"I'm sure that's not true" I say.
"Oh it is. I mean I admire my dad for serving our country, but I barely know the man and he barely knows me. He's always been working and when he wasn't working all we did was play football. We've never been able to talk, not in the same way that my mom and I can" he says.
"I guess we have opposite problems. I love my dads and we get along really well, but I have no relationship with my mom, because I don't know her" I say.
"You don't know her? How come?" he asks.
"She was the surrogate my dads used and she's never contacted me. I don't know why, but she's never had any interest in me, so I've never had any interest in her" I say.
"Liar" he says.
"Okay so you got me. My mom may have no interest in me, but I want to know about her. I used to ask my dads about her a lot when I was younger, but they didn't like me asking so eventually I stopped. I don't even know what her name is" I say.
"I can't imagine anyone not wanting to know you" he says, tucking a stray piece of hair behind my ear.
"Thank you, that's really sweet Finn" I say.
"You know if you really want to find your mom, I could help you" he says.
"Really? You would do that for me?" I ask.
"I would" Finn says. A short wave of silence passes over us before he speaks again. "How about desert?" he says, opening the picnic basket.
"What is it? I bet it's something good, if those chocolate chip cookies your mom made us yesterday are anything to go by" I say.
"It's banana bread I think" he says, handing me a plate. We eat the entire loaf of banana bread between the two of us, because Finn's mom's cooking is so delicious. I make banana bread but it's nowhere near as good as hers.
"Should we call for that tow now?" he asks.
"I'm having too much fun to go home. I think we should dance under the stars. The stars are beautiful tonight" I say.
"Your eyes put the stars to shame" he says.
"That's a total lie, but thank you anyway" I say smiling.
"Do we really have to dance? I'm a sucky dancer" he says.
"I'm sure that's not true" I say.
"It is, trust me" he says.
"Well either way I'd like to dance with you, if you'll let me" I say.
"We don't have any music" he points out.
"Your car radio?" I ask.
"It won't work if the engine's not running" he says.
"Do you have an IPod?" I ask.
"Yeah I do" he says.
"Put it on shuffle and we'll dance to the first song that comes on. Then that can be our song" I say.
"I like that" he says.
"What?" I ask.
"Having a song that's ours" he says.
"Me too" I say smiling. He turns the volume all the way up on his IPod before placing it on top of the picnic basket and pressing play. I'm surprised when I hear the song, Tim McGraw's Just To See You Smile. "I wouldn't have taken you for a Tim McGraw fan" I say.
"My dad is and he introduced me to some of his stuff, which I actually quite liked so I put some of it on my IPod. Now, Miss Berry may I have this dance?" he says holding out his hand.
"You may" I say laughing softly. He helps me up into the back of his truck and wraps his arms around me. I rest my head on his shoulders and we dance together. He wasn't kidding when he said he wasn't a good dancer, he steps on my toes more times than I can count but I don't mind. I actually find it kind of endearing, how clumsy he is.
Neither of us notice when the song changes, we just keep dancing like nothing else exists. I don't know how long we are dancing for, only that my feet hurt when I finally decide to check the time.
"SHIT!" I yell when I see the time on my phone.
"What's wrong Rach?" Finn asks.
"It's already eleven o'clock! We completely lost track of time. My dads are going to kill me" I say.
"Calm down Rach, I'll call the tow now and I'm sure it will be fine" he says.
"You haven't met my dads. They're very protective of me and they told me not to be back too late from our date. If you bring me back late, they won't just kill me, they may kill you too and I don't want you to make a bad impression on them before you've even properly met them" I say.
"Just explain that the car broke down because it's the truth. We haven't been doing anything bad, just dancing" he says stroking my shoulder reassuringly.
"I can't tell them that the car broke down because you're not supposed to be driving" I say.
"How did your dads think we were getting anywhere then?" he asks.
"I told them that your mom was dropping us off and was then coming back to pick us up later" I say.
"Well then just tell them that my mom had some car on the way home and we had to wait for a tow. It's not that far from the truth" he says.
"What if they bring it up in front of your mom tomorrow?" I ask.
"I'll explain the situation to her; she'll be cool about it. Well that's not entirely true, she's probably going to punish me for driving with a fake license but I don't think she'll say anything" he says.
"Are you sure?" I ask.
"Yes, I'm sure. Now you call your dads and tell them why you're going to be late and I'll call for a tow, okay?" he says.
"Okay" I reply smiling a little more. We make our respective phone calls and then sit down together whilst we wait for the tow truck to arrive, looking at the stars.
"That one there" Finn says pointing to a star.
"What?" I ask confused as to what he's talking about.
"That star is you because it's the biggest and brightest star in the sky, just like you are going to be one day" he says.
"That's really sweet" I say.
"So what about me? Which star would be mine?" he asks.
"That's easy. Your star would be that one right there" I say pointing to a star.
"Oh yeah, and why's that?" he asks.
"Because it's right next to mine" I say.
"I like that. This way we'll always be next to each other somewhere" Finn says smiling his adorable smile at me.
"That's exactly what I thought" I say and we share a smile. This is the perfect moment that I have been waiting for all evening. I lean over, wrapping my arms around Finn's neck. We turn our heads to face each other and then I kiss him. It lasts for several minutes and we only pull away when we need air again, and it leaves me with this wonderful buttery feeling inside.
"That was just…" Finn says but I interrupt him.
"Wow" I say.
"Yeah, wow" he says.
"You want to do it again?" I ask.
"Absolutely" he says grinning from ear to ear. We kiss again, and if it's possible; this one is even better. Whilst we wait for the tow truck to arrive, Finn and I talk about tomorrow evening and I tell him everything he needs to know to impress my dads-he's going to need it considering that arriving back late from our date is not exactly going to make my dads love him. But I'm not sure that they will ever think that anyone is good enough for me.
"You kids called for a tow?" a voice says. The tow truck has pulled up and the man has stuck his head out of the window.
"Yeah, thanks" Finn says. He doesn't ask to see Finn's license or anything, so he must think that Finn is at least eighteen; since he towers over pretty much everyone it's quite easy to think that.
"You guys hop in the front with me and I'll load your car on the back of the truck. Would you like me to take it to the nearest repair shop?" he asks.
"That would be great. How much will it cost?" Finn says.
"We can talk about that when you come to pick the car from the repair shop. Come on, get in, you kids must be freezing" he says.
"I am kind of cold" I admit. Finn passes his jacket to me, and I take it gratefully. We climb into the front of the truck, and Finn gives the truck driver his address. We're quiet on the drive home for most of the way, aside from the driver making some small talk with us.
After dropping the car off at the repair shop, the man drives us back to Finn's house. "Here I should give you something for driving us home" Finn says to the man, reaching into his pocket for his wallet.
"Don't worry about it; I couldn't have left you kids stranded in Sidney" he says pushing Finn's wallet back towards him.
"Thank you, sir" Finn says.
"Yeah, thanks a lot" I say.
"No problem. You should get a call from the repair shop when your car is done. Did you kids have a good first date?" he asks.
"We did, thank you" I say.
"Good. If you ever need a tow, call and ask for Alan; I'd be happy to give you a ride home" he says.
"We'll remember that" Finn says.
"Goodnight you two" he says.
"Night" we say together and watch as the truck pulls out of Finn's driveway. When the truck is gone, Finn takes my hand and we walk up to the porch of my house, stopping on the bottom step.
"I had a really great time with you tonight" I say.
"Me too. I don't think I've ever had this much fun with a girl" he says.
"Do you want to do it again sometime?" Finn asks.
"I'd love to. How about next Friday? We could make Friday night our regular date night" I say.
"That's a great idea" he replies.
"I'd better go inside, my dads are going to be worried enough already" I say.
"Are you sure they're going to like me? I'm really worried about tomorrow" he says.
"Just be yourself and they'll love you" I say.
"Goodnight Rach" he says.
"Goodnight Finn" I say. Finn starts to walk back over to his house and I call after him "Wait!" He stops and I run over to him.
"Aren't you going to give me a goodnight kiss?" I ask.
"I can't believe I forgot about that" he says.
"I can't believe it either" I say smiling cheekily. He steps towards me, wraps his arms around my waist and kisses me.
"That good enough for you?" Finn asks. I pretend to think about it for a while.
"Yes" I say smiling. "Goodnight, again"
"Goodnight" Finn says. We share one last kiss and then turn and walk back to our respective houses. I wait a few seconds when I reach the front door of my house, because I'm slightly worried about how my dads are going to react about my being home so late. They are sitting in the living room when I come in.
"I'm sorry I'm late, I know you said to be home by midnight, but it took the tow a while to get there" I say.
"It's fine, princess" Dad says.
"Really?" I ask surprised that they're being so calm about this.
"We trust you and it's not your fault that Carole's car broke down. I hope you thanked her for driving you" Dad says.
"Of course I did" I say. I feel bad for lying to my dads, but I don't want Finn to get into trouble for driving with a fake license.
"Did you have a nice time on your date sweetheart?" Daddy asks.
"We had a great time. We had a picnic and we danced under the stars, it was just magic" I say.
"That's great princess" Dad says.
"I'd love to tell you guys all about it but I'm kind of beat. Do you mind if we talk more in the morning?" I ask.
"Sure sweetie. Goodnight" my dad says.
"Goodnight" I say, making my way up the stairs to my bedroom. I collapse onto my bed, exhausted but happy. I can't tell, but I'm pretty sure I fall asleep smiling.
Last Day of Summer
Finn and I had spent all summer together and it had been amazing. I couldn't wait to walk into my first day of high school on Monday with him as my boyfriend. Tonight was our date night, so I was walking over to Finn's house to meet him for our date. As I approach the house I can hear yelling. I know I shouldn't, that I should just turn around and walk back to my house but I can't help myself. I stand outside the door of Finn's house and listen to the argument going on inside.
"What if I refuse to go?" Finn yells.
"We have to Finn, he's your father" Carole says, calmly.
"He promised us! He promised that I would have the next four years to go to high school in one place" he says, not yelling but still with a slightly raised voice.
"And you can Finn, but it has to be in California, not here" she says.
"I don't want to leave Mom. I love it here" he says, his voice cracking a little.
"I know you do Finn. But your dad needs us right now, he's very sick" Carole says.
"Why can't you just go?" Finn asks.
"Because I can't leave you here by yourself Finn. Besides, don't you want to be with your dad? He has cancer, he could die" Carole says.
"I don't want Dad to die, of course I don't. But I want to stay here, with Rachel" he says.
"I understand you've become close to Rachel but this is about our family and family comes first always" Carole says.
"If you think that I am just close to Rach, then you don't understand Mom. I love her" he says. I smile to myself when I hear this; he's never told me that he loved me before.
"That doesn't change the fact that your father is very sick Finn and we have to go to California to be with him" she says.
"How long has he known?" Finn asks.
"Known what?" Carole replies.
"That he has…" Finn says but trails off before he can say the last word.
"Cancer? He only told me last week" she says.
"He's known longer Mom, he must have. I bet he allowed us to come to Ohio, knowing that if he got worse we'd have to go back to California and then he'd get his way. That's probably why he argued so much with you to get us to come back earlier in the summer" he says.
"Whether that's the case or not, we have to go and be with him Finn" she says.
"Well I don't want to and I won't" he says stubbornly.
"Finn you are being astonishingly selfish right now" Carole says.
"It's my turn! For my entire life, it's always been about Dad. We always went were Dad had to be for his job, never once were my feelings taken into account whenever we moved. I was so pleased when we moved here because for once it was about me, but now yet again, it's all about Dad. I know that's wrong and incredibly selfish of me but I'm tired of it being about him. I love it here and I love Rachel and I want to stay and go to high school here where I actually have friends. But that's just my opinion and I think we all know by now that my opinion doesn't mean anything to anyone in this family!" Finn yells. I hear loud footsteps up the stairs and then the slamming of the door. I should go now but I have a feeling Finn might need me, so I ring the doorbell. When she answers Carole has tears running down her cheeks.
"Did you hear all of that?" she asks. I don't say anything, just nod. I don't see any point in lying; if I did I don't think she'd believe me anyway.
"Can I see Finn? Please?" I ask.
"I'm not sure if he'll want to see anyone right now, but you can try" Carole says stepping aside to allow me to walk up the stairs to Finn's bedroom. I tap lightly on the door three times.
"Go away Mom, I don't want to talk" Finn says in a muffled voice.
"It's not your mom, it's Rachel" I say. I hear footsteps walking towards the door and then the door swings open to reveal Finn, tear stains on his cheeks which he quickly tries to wipe away.
"Did you hear our fight?" Finn asks.
"Yes I did and I think your mom is right" I say.
"You want me to leave?" Finn says, his eyes filling with tears. I step forward and hug him tightly.
"Of course I don't. I love you Finn, and I wish more than anything that you could stay here with me. But you need to be with your Dad, otherwise you'll regret it for the rest of your life; I know you will" I say.
"You love me?" he asks.
"Yes, I love you Finn" I say.
"I love you too, Rachel" he says kissing me. "This is why I can't leave" he says when he steps away from me.
"The same reason you can't leave is exactly the reason why you will" I say.
"What do you mean?" he asks confused.
"You don't want to leave because you love me, but you will leave because no matter how much you love me, and not matter how much you say you resent your dad, you really do love him and you would do anything for him. I also know how much you love your mom and that you want to support her through this because that's the kind of son you are. So you see? You say you can't leave because you love me but you will leave because you love your family and you don't want them to go through this alone" I say.
"But I can't leave you" he insists.
"Yes you can. I don't want you to, but you have to be with your dad right now and I understand that. Do you know why I know that you can leave?" I say.
"No" Finn replies. I take his hand and lead him down the stairs, then out the back door into the Hudson's backyard. I scan the sky and find the biggest and brightest star. "You remember on our first date, you said that the biggest and brightest star in the sky would be my star and I said that the one next to it would be yours?" I ask.
"Yeah I remember" he says.
"And you said that this way we'd always be next to each other somewhere?" I say.
"I remember that too" he says.
"So when you're in California and you're missing me, you look outside and find the brightest star in the night sky and that will be me, looking out for you" I say.
"I'd rather be here with you. Mom said we'd have to go back to California tomorrow; I haven't even had the chance to prepare myself for leaving. I'm not ready to go" he says.
"Your dad can't help that he's sick Finn" I say gently.
"I know that. I know what I said was horrible, but I just really don't want to leave you. Besides there's another reason why I don't want to go" he says.
"Why's that?" I ask.
"I don't want to see my dad die" Finn says in a small voice.
"He might not die, there are treatments for almost all cancers nowadays" I say.
"He has stage four pancreatic cancer Rach; he's most likely not going to survive more than a year. I can't go there and watch my dad die" he says, burying his head in my shoulder and crying into my shirt.
"I thought your mom said he could die, not that he was dying" I say.
"She just doesn't want to tell me how bad he really is" he whispers.
"Then it's even more important that you go. If you possibly only have a year left with your dad then you want to spend as much time as you can with him before you don't have a dad to spend time with anymore. I know it will be hard for you Finn but you won't be going through this alone. You and your mom can support each other, and you'll always have me. I might be on the other side of the country, but you'll always have me" I say.
"Really?" he asks.
"Really" I say. Finn and I lie down next to each other on the grass and he takes my hand.
"I can't believe I have to leave tomorrow" he says.
"You'll be back at Christmas. At least I hope you'll be back at Christmas" I say.
"Of course I'll be back at Christmas, I can't miss my first Christmas with you" he says kissing me.
"Good" I say.
"I can't believe this is our last night together" Finn says sadly.
"We'd better make it count then" I say. I help him up, then I take my IPod out of my pocket and turn the volume up all the way before placing it on the ground.
"It's our song" he says smiling.
"Dance with me?" I ask, holding out my hand to him.
"I'd love to, Miss Berry" he says. He wraps his arms around my waist and I rest my head on his shoulder. We dance to the our song on repeat all night long until we are both exhausted and then we both fall asleep, me with my head on Finn's chest.
The Big Goodbye
It only really hits me when I see the moving van pull up in front of Finn's house; that he's going to be gone and I won't get to see him every day. I know it's the right thing to do, that Finn will regret it if he stays here and doesn't stay with his father before he dies but a selfish part of me wishes that he didn't have to leave. Since I spent the night at Finn's house, I help Finn and his mom take the boxes out to the van, and by lunchtime the van is packed and ready to go. It pulls out of the driveway first, and then it's time for Finn and Carole to leave.
"Mom can you give me and Rach a minute, please?" Finn asks.
"Sure sweetie. Don't be too long though, we have to get going if we're going to make it to St Louis this evening and keep on schedule for getting to California in a few days time" Carole says.
"I'm really going to miss you" I say, trying really hard not to cry.
"I'll miss you too Rach. But I'll be back at Christmas remember?" he says.
"That's over three months away" I say.
"You were the one that was saying that as if it was a good thing last night" Finn says.
"That was before I saw the van leave and it hit me that you were really leaving" I say, swallowing hard to avoid crying in front of him.
"I have something for you. I was going to give it to you for your birthday but I thought since I was leaving today, I'd give it to you now" he says handing me a wrapped box. I unwrap it to reveal a long, black box and then open the box. Inside is a gold necklace with a gold charm that says "Finn". "This way you could always have a piece of me with you" he says.
"It's beautiful Finn, but it must have been way too expensive. Is this real gold?" I ask.
"I wish, it's white gold" he says.
"It's amazing but it's too expensive. I can't accept this" I say pushing it back into his hand.
"Yes you can because you deserve it. I didn't save up an entire summer's salary from Breadstix for you to reject it" he says.
"Thank you, it's the most amazing thing I've ever owned" I say, taking the necklace. "Do I have to put it on myself?" I ask, raising my eyebrows.
"No I can do that. Turn around" he says. I do and he attaches the clasp of the necklace around my neck. When he's done, I turn back to face him.
"What do you think?" I ask.
"It's perfect, just like its owner" Finn says and I have to fight the urge to cry again. I wrap my arms around his neck and hug him tight, like I never want to let him go.
"Promise me you'll never forget me?" I ask.
"I could never forget you Rachel, you're still my girlfriend no matter where I live" he says.
"I hate to interrupt this, but can you guys wrap this up soon? We need to leave pretty soon if we're going to make it to St Louis" Carole calls out of the window of the car.
"Just give us a few more minutes Mom" Finn calls back, rolling his eyes so only I can see which makes me laugh a little.
"You'll call me right?" I ask.
"As often as I can, and we can skype too" he says.
"I guess we can't put the goodbye off any longer" I say.
"I guess not" he replies.
"Goodbye Finn" I say.
"Goodbye Rach" he says.
"This kiss better be good, it's got to last me until Christmas" I say smirking.
"Trust me, it's going to be the best kiss you've ever had" Finn says. He pulls me into a romantic drop, like the ones you see in the movies and kisses me hard on the lips. We kiss for several minutes, neither of us wanting to let the other one go. Eventually we step away from each other.
"I love you, Rachel Berry" Finn says.
"I love you more, Finn Hudson" I reply.
He shrugs, smiles that adorable smile at me and then says "If you say so". With that, he turns and walks towards the car, sliding into the seat next to Carole. I watch as the car pulls out of the driveway, waving to Finn until I can no longer see him. Once they're gone, I walk slowly back over to my house.
"RACHEL BARBRA BERRY, WHERE WERE YOU LAST NIGHT? YOU NEVER CAME HOME, YOU NEVER CALLED, WHAT HAPPENED?" Daddy yells as soon as I walk through the door. In the whirlwind that was my last night with Finn, I completely forgot about calling them and telling them that I was staying over. It's probably best that I didn't, they would have totally freaked out and thought we were doing more than just dancing and sleeping.
"I'm sorry okay" I say.
"That's all? No explanation?" Dad asks incredulously. The tears I have been holding back through my goodbye finally spill over and I fall into my dad's arms, sobbing uncontrollably. His face softens.
"What's wrong sweetie?" he asks, stroking my hair.
"It's Finn, he's gone" I say, crying harder into his sweater.
3 years later
Finn
It's been three years and I miss Rachel more and more every day. I listen to our song on repeat, and I spent the entirety of the first September that I moved here in my room crying because I couldn't see her. The past three years have been really tough for me. My dad was even sicker than we could have possibly imagined and he died three months after we moved to California.
Flashback
I couldn't stand seeing my Dad like this. He'd always been a strong, proud man and now here he was, lying in a hospital bed, a broken shell of a man. At first it seemed like he was getting better, but that didn't last long. He's attached to all these machines that are basically keeping him alive, and it might be wrong of me, but I just want this hell to be over. I want my dad to not be in pain anymore. I take my usual seat next to my dad and put my hand in his.
"Hey Dad. There's not much to tell you today. School is the same as ever, the only good part about it is football. Rachel called today, and it made me miss her even more, but I'm going to see her in a few weeks and that will be great. She's amazing Dad, I think you'd really love her. She loves me just as much as Mom loves you and she's the most determined person you'll ever meet. Some people think it's irritating how determined she is, but I think it's endearing. I'm kind of in awe at how she knows exactly what she wants; I wish I could be like that. The only thing I've ever been certain of is that I love her and I want to be with her for the rest of my life. It makes me sad to know that you'll never get to see me graduate high school, or marry Rachel, or graduate college, or meet our kids. She's the one who made me realise that I'd regret it if I never really got to know you and I wish you were going to be around longer so I could. But I want you to know that despite of what I may have said in the past that I really do love you Dad" I say.
I feel him grip my hand back and almost jump back in shock. His eyes flicker open and stare right back at me.
"I love you too, son" he croaks. I press the call button for the nurses next to his bed, then I hear the machine next to him that monitors his heart rate start to beep out of control. A team of doctors and nurses run in and they try to get me to leave but I refuse. I just keep holding his hand until it goes completely limp in mine.
"I'm sorry, he's gone" the nurse says, touching my shoulder reassuringly.
"Can you please get my mom? She went to the cafeteria to get some food" I say in a small voice.
"Sure" she says sympathetically. I wait until they all walk out, before collapsing on top of my dad and crying.
End of flashback
I begged Mom to move us back to Ohio after Dad died. I didn't want to be in Oceanside anymore, it felt tainted by his death but Mom was living up to her promise of letting me go to high school in one place, that place just wasn't where I wanted it to be. Sure I had friends in California, but all I wanted was Rach. We had somehow managed to survive three years in a long distance relationship, skyping as often as possible and visiting each other on school holidays but I missed what we had that first summer together, where we could see each other every day.
"Finn!" my mom calls up the stairs to my room. I don't answer, I'm sure I probably won't want to hear what she has to say anyway. Then I hear footsteps coming upstairs. I should have known she wouldn't have given up.
"Did you not hear me?" she asks.
"I did, I just chose not to answer" I say.
"Don't be rude Finn" Mom says.
"What do you want Mom?" I ask.
"There's a letter for you. It's from Rachel" she says handing me an envelope. She laughs when my eyes light up as soon as I hear that Rachel has written me a letter.
"As you were" she says leaving my room. I turn my favourite song back on and tear into the letter. It's a letter that's dated three years ago, just after we moved to Oceanside.
Dear Finn
I wrote this letter so many times in my head before deciding on what I was going to say. I don't know if I'll even end up sending this, I probably don't have the courage.
I know I told you to go to California to be with your dad, and I know it was the right thing to do, but I miss you. I miss you so damn much, I can barely breathe. It may be incredibly selfish of me to do this, but I need you back here with me. I thought I could handle you leaving, but it turns out I can't. I keep looking next door at your empty house, imagining that you're there and every time I see that you aren't it breaks my heart all over again.
I've never been very good at putting my emotions into words, I've always been better at singing them but since I can't sing to you right now this will have to do. I'm not sure how much longer I can do this Finn, I don't want to break up with you but carrying on this relationship with you there may be too hard. Please come home soon, I can't live without you.
If you don't come back and we don't manage to make it, which I hope we will then I want to tell you this:
When you think Tim McGraw
I hope you think my favourite song
Someday you'll turn your radio on
I hope it takes you back to that place
When you think happiness
I hope you think that little black dress
Think of my head on your chest
And my old faded blue jeans
When you think Tim McGraw
I hope you think of me
(Yes I know these aren't my words, it's a song but these lyrics really sum up how I feel right now)
I don't know if I'll ever send this, it's probably likely to remain under my bed for a long time.
All I know right now is that I'd do anything just to see you smile again, to see that smile across from me.
With all my love,
Rach
Tears are rolling down my cheeks by the end of the letter. Rach was always so positive, I never realised that she missed me just as much as I missed her. I make up my mind then and there that I want to go home again. After this summer I will be in my senior year of high school and I want to spend it with Rach, I know I do.
"MOM!" I call, and wait for the sound of footsteps coming up the stairs.
"What's wrong Finn?" she asks when she opens the door to my room.
"I'm going home" I say determinedly.
"Finn we already discussed this. We're not moving anywhere until you finish high school. You only have your senior year left, what would be the point?" she says.
"The point is that I want to spend this year with Rachel" I say.
"You do realise that you could be going to college in different states next year right?" Mom asks.
"No we're not. She's applying to performing arts colleges in New York, so I'll apply to college in New York too" I say.
"You can't base the colleges you apply to based on a girl Finn. She's your first real girlfriend and you haven't been together for any extended period of time since you were fifteen. How do you even know the relationship is going to last?" Mom says.
"Because I love her and despite the fact we've been living in different states for the past three years and like you said we haven't been able to spend anything longer than a few weeks together since we were fifteen, I still want to be with her" I say.
"You really can't wait until you both go to college?" she asks.
"No" I say adamantly.
"Then I guess there's nothing I can do to stop you" she says.
"Really?" I ask.
"You're eighteen, legally an adult, if you want to leave there's nothing I can do to stop you" she says.
"What happened to we're not moving anywhere until I finish high school?" I ask, surprised at her sudden change of heart.
"I saw that determined look in your eyes, it's the same one your dad always had. I know it's no use arguing with that look because whenever I did with your dad, he always got what he wanted anyway" Mom says, smiling wistfully.
"You could come with me" I suggest.
"I wish I could honey" she replies.
"Why can't you?" I ask.
"Because I have a good job here and you're going to need every cent I can give you if you're going to move back to Ohio by yourself" she says.
"I'm going to miss you Mom" I say pulling her into me for a hug.
"I'll miss you too Finny" she says, using a nickname she hasn't used since I was little. She turns to leave the room, but stops at the door.
"Rachel's lucky to have someone as sweet as you" she says.
"Thanks, I hope she thinks so too" I reply. When I hear Mom shut the door, I grab my laptop from under my bed. It takes all my self-restraint to not book the next flight leaving to Ohio, but I decide that I should stay until tomorrow so I can have a last night with my mom, and using her credit card, book a flight to Ohio leaving tomorrow morning. I can't hide my excitement for the rest of evening, this time tomorrow I will be seeing Rachel again.
The next day
"Have you got everything? Your passport? Your money?" Mom asks anxiously when she drops me off at the airport the next morning.
"We already went over this at home Mom. I have everything I'll need from now until I get to the Berry's. You'll ship the rest of my stuff over once I've found a place to stay for the rest of the year" I say.
"I know I just want to make sure" Mom says.
"Are you sure you're okay with me going?" I ask.
"I wouldn't have said yes if I wasn't" Mom replies.
"Just checking" I say.
"Did you call the Berry's so that they know you're coming?" Mom asks.
"You saw me do it. Leroy and Hiram know I'm coming but they haven't told Rachel because I wanted it to be a surprise. They were perfectly happy for me to stay with them until I get around to finding an apartment to rent, as long as I stay in their spare room and not in Rachel's room" I say.
"Sounds like Leroy and Hiram" Mom says, laughing at that last bit. "I wish you'd just stay with them for the rest of the year rather than renting a place by yourself" she adds.
"I don't want to overstay my welcome in their house Mom. Besides I'm planning on seeing if can get my old job at Breadstix back and before I left I was helping Puck clean pools. With that plus your help, I should have enough to rent a small one bedroom apartment in Lima" I say.
"I'm so proud of you Finn, you know that right?" Mom says.
"I know" I say. I may have doubted whether my dad was proud of me at times, but never have I doubted how proud my mom is of me.
"This is it then. My baby boy's all grown up and doesn't need me anymore" Mom says.
"I'll always need you Mom and this isn't it. I'll be back to see you at Christmas" I say.
"Unless Rachel wants you to stay with her for Christmas" Mom replies.
"Her family's Jewish, they don't celebrate Christmas. If she decides she wants to celebrate Christmas with me, then she'll come back and spend it with us because I'm not leaving my mom to be alone on Christmas" I say adamantly.
"I love you Finn" Mom says.
"I love you too Mom" I say. She embraces me in the biggest hug ever, like the kind she used to give me when I fell over and scraped my knee when I was little.
"You promise you'll call me when you get to the Berry's house?" Mom says.
"I'll call you when I land, when I get to the Berry's house I'll want to see Rach as soon as possible and then we'll probably be talking for a while" I say.
"Just talking?" Mom asks raising her eyebrows.
"Yes, I think if Rachel and I do anything more than talk whilst I'm staying at her house then her dads will pull me out of my bed whilst I'm sleeping and cut my balls off" I say making my mom laugh so hard that she would have fallen off her chair if she hadn't been in the car.
"But you will call me as soon as your plane lands?" she asks.
"Yes, definitely" I say reassuring my mom.
"Goodbye, Finn" she says.
"It's not goodbye, it's more of a see you at Christmas" I say.
"Well then see you at Christmas" she says.
"See you at Christmas Mom" I say. We share one last hug and then I get out of the car. I grab my suitcase from the back of the car and with one last wave to Mom, I walk into LAX.
Four and a half hours later I arrive in Columbus. After getting my baggage from baggage reclaim I walk out of the airport expecting to get a taxi but instead I see Rach's dads waiting outside their car.
"I didn't ask you guys to come and pick me up did I?" I ask.
"No, but we couldn't let you just get a taxi all the way from Columbus. We thought it would be only right if we picked you up" Leroy says. Finn had always thought Rachel's dads hated him but they clearly can't hate him that much since they're letting him stay at their house and came to Columbus airport to pick him up.
"Thanks a lot, you really didn't have to" I say. They pick up my suitcase and put it in the back of the car. On the drive back from Columbus to Lima, Rachel's dads ask me about Oceanside and I ask them about how Rachel's been since I last saw her during spring vacation. They ask me how my mom's been but neither of us bring up the topic of the upcoming anniversary of my dad's death. Eventually when we run out of small talk, her dads turn on the radio and we listen to that for the rest of the ride back to Lima.
We pull in to the driveway of the Berry's house and her dads ask me to wait in the car whilst they go to get Rachel. I find myself a little nervous of seeing her again. I mean we skype, text or call every day and I saw her a couple of months ago but this is different. This time I'm not going to be leaving in a few weeks, I'm here to stay. Maybe she doesn't want me to come back anymore. I try to remove these doubts from my head but I know that until I see her they'll still be there.
A few minutes later I see Rachel and her dads on the front porch of her house. They lead her over to the car.
"We have a surprise for you sweetheart" Leroy says.
"What is it?" she asks sounding a little confused.
Her dads smile at each other and Hiram steps forward and opens the car door. No sooner have I stepped out of the car than Rach wraps her legs around my waist kissing me hard on the lips, not concerned about the fact that her dads are standing three feet away watching.
"What are you doing here Finn?" she asks when she finally pulls away from me.
"I'm here to see you of course" I say.
"How long are you staying? The whole summer or do you leave in a couple of weeks?" she asks.
"I'm not leaving this time" I say.
"What do you mean?" she asks. Her dads leave us and walk back towards the house, sensing that this should be a private moment.
"I mean that I'm staying in Ohio for my senior year" I say.
"For real?" Rach asks her eyes going wide.
"Yes. We'll be spending our senior year together and then come next summer we'll be living in our own apartment in New York" I say.
"You're amazing do you know that Finn?" she says kissing me again.
"I'm only amazing because you make me amazing" I say.
"You don't give yourself enough credit Finn. You don't need me to be amazing, you just are" she says. We walk to the Berry's front porch together and sit to watch the stars like we did the night of our very first date.
"The stars are so beautiful tonight. Look there's yours over there, and there's mine next to it" she says pointing to the two brightest stars in the sky.
"Your eyes still put the stars to shame" I say.
"That's still a lie" she says kissing me. We sit together watching the stars for a long time that night, and it feels like a brand new chapter in our relationship, one that is going to last for the rest of our lives.
A/N: Sorry this took so long, I wasn't intending for this chapter to be as long as it's ended up but it kind of took on a life of its own after a while. I'll be going back to school soon so I'm not sure how quickly I'll be able to update any of my stories, but here are your choices of song for the next chapter: Fifteen, Treacherous, Stay Stay Stay or Better Than Revenge.
Review?