The day flew by Quinn barely saw Rachel after they got into the corridors. Even in Glee everyone was too busy getting ready for Nationals that they only exchanged a few words. She got home and the house smelt really good, she followed her nose into the kitchen and found her Mom hard at work.

"It smells so good Mom, Rachel is going to be very impressed"

"I hope so Quinn, I wouldn't have it any other way. All guests should receive a proper Fabray welcome. Also this vegan food is amazing. Try the sauce I made" she held out a spoon and Quinn readily tasted

"So good. Wow. Maybe I should go vegan too"

"Oh no dear, that kind of lifestyle is not for you. Experimenting is fine, but you need to stay healthy and eat properly"

Quinn just shook her head and headed up to her room. She showered and changed into a pale blue dress and fixed her hair and makeup.

It wasn't long before she heard the front door and she rushed down to let Rachel in but her Mom beat her to it though.

"Good evening Rachel"

"Good evening Mrs Fabray, thank you for inviting me to dinner tonight"

"You are more than welcome dear. Thanks to you I am getting my Quinnie back and it's wonderful. I had not seen her smile in…well let's just say it had been far too long, come on in. dinner will be ready shortly"

"It smells delicious" Rachel paused as she saw Quinn and smiled

"Hey good to see you" Quinn blushed

"I love your dress"

"Thank you"

Judy watched the exchange with a puzzled look on her face before she interrupted.

"Come on girls, you can watch some TV while I finish getting things ready. Quinn perhaps you could offer Rachel a drink"

"Sure Mom. Rach?"

"Vitamin water?"

"Coming right up" Quinn followed her Mom into the kitchen, her smile bright. She noticed her Mom looking at her funny and paused.

"Everything ok Mom?"

"Sure Quinn. Everything is just fine"

Within half an hour they were sat down and enjoying the feast that Judy had cooked.

"This has to be the best lasagne I have ever tasted"

"I can get you the recipe. Perhaps your fathers could make it for you? Are they both Vegan?"

"Just Daddy."

"I do admire your fathers Rachel. I mean it must be ever so difficult living their lifestyle in a small town like Lima."

"They love it here Mrs Fabray"

"Really you can call me Judy. But it must be hard for them, being openly gay is quite the life choice. It's not something I would wish on my worst enemy. Well I guess I am just glad my Quinn won't have to go through those sorts of struggles, she has had enough on her plate already to last a lifetime, haven't you dear"

Quinn did not like the direction of the conversation, but her mouth remained closed and Rachel just watched her agape before finally finding her own words.

"I think Judy that as far as my Dads are concerned it is better to be open and honest. Living a lie would only have destroyed them" she stared pointedly at Quinn. "They are happy and I am happy. We have a good life"

"I'm pleased Rachel I am, but I bet you wouldn't wish the treatment that Kurt Hummel has been subjected to on anyone. This town is not so open-minded. It's Burt I feel sorry for, he has to deal with all that abuse about his son, I mean it's such a shame. If the boy's mother hadn't passed away so tragically I am sure things would have been different"

"Quinn?" Rachel looked at the girl opposite her

"Sorry?"

"Really?" Rachel countered

"Um Mom maybe we could talk about something else" Quinn was still in shock at what her mother had said. She watched Rachel shaking her head and could just make out the tears hidden behind the anger in her eyes. She just hung her head in response.

"Could you pass the water?" Rachel finally broke the silence a short time later.

"Sure" Quinn went to hand it to her. As Rachel reached out their fingers brushed together and Quinn dropped the jug with a start

"Quinn" her Mom rushed out of the room to get some towels

"Really Quinn?" Rachel hissed

"What?"

"What is the matter with you?"

"I just, I don't know Rachel. It's just my Mom and the things she said. Please don't do this now"

"Fine. Later"

Quinn grimaced as she saw the look on Rachel's face. It had all been going so well. She had let her heart lead her and it kept saying it was right to be with Rachel, but sitting at a table with her Mom talking about gay lifestyles and Quinn's past choices, well she freaked out.

The rest of the meal was amicable. Conversation flowed reasonably and Quinn did her best to unwind.

"Thank you Judy. That was lovely"

"You are always welcome Rachel"

"I should probably get going then"

Quinn felt her heart lurch. Rachel leaving straight after dinner wasn't part of the plan.

"Oh. Didn't you want to catch up on that thing we were doing earlier"

"Not tonight thank you Quinn. I am tired. Maybe we could work on it at school tomorrow" Rachel was polite but Quinn knew how cold she was really being.

"Sure. Oh but I have that book in my room for you, so just come and get it. It'll only take a minute to find"

"Ok" Rachel reluctantly agreed

Quinn shut the door and turned to face steely eyes

"Well?"

"Rachel please" Quinn begged

"No Quinn, you could have said something, you should have and what the hell was that with the water. My touch that alarming"

"I freaked ok, I didn't know what to do. She's my Mom Rach. What did you want me to do? Tell her I'm gay?"

"Are you?"

"I don't know, maybe. But I can't do this now, not to her. Things are going so well"

"I'm sorry Quinn" Rachel softened a little "it's just not right what she said, well I get defensive when people talk about my Dads anyway, so when she said all that about you. Well it stung"

"I should have stopped her. I just couldn't"

"Sure, but I meant what I said"

"About?"

"Living a lie can destroy a person"

"Oh you mean us"

"Whatever this is, yes secrets are fun, but they can hurt too"

"Can we talk? Will you stay a bit longer?"

A loud knock at the door was followed by her Mom walking in. Quinn looked mortified. She was just glad she hadn't been doing the things to Rachel that she hoped she would be by now.

"Rachel dear I have packed up some lasagne for you to take home and Quinn here are your clothes to put away"

"Really Mom?" Quinn didn't know what was going on, but her Mom walking into her room with an armful of her things was definitely not normal. Her Mom just smiled and she shrugged in frustration. Rachel headed to the door. Quinn hastily grabbed a book off her desk.

"Rachel, wait don't forget to take this" she handed the book over.

"Thank you Quinn, it's kind of you to lend it to me. I am sure I will enjoy reading it"

"You will"

"Well thank you again for tonight and you too Judy. It was lovely. I better be going though"

"I'll see you out" Quinn followed her out of her room and was flustered to feel her Mom a step behind.

"Here you go Rachel" Judy passed her the lasagne as the three stood awkwardly by the front door.

"Thank you. Good night" she smiled at Judy

Quinn opened the door and stepped outside with Rachel

"Good night Rach"

"Goodnight Quinn" Rachel moved forward as if to kiss her and Quinn felt herself pull back. The look on Rachel's face almost broke her. The brunette just turned and walked to her car. She didn't look back once. Quinn just stood there unable to move.

"Come inside Quinn, it's getting cold"

"Sorry Mom, I just wanted to see that Rachel got away ok"

"What a lovely girl, it must be very hard for her. Rachel is a very brave girl, I am sorry if I upset her earlier. I'm just not used to gay people. it wasn't like it is now when I was younger. But I am glad you have made a nice friend at last. I hope you don't mess this one up"

"I hope so too" she mumbled and kissed her Mom goodnight.

Her mind was full again and it was threatening to control her heart. As she lay in bed her Moms words echoed in her head. Kissing Rachel was amazing. Touching Rachel set her on fire. In those moments Quinn was happy because she didn't think at all but now all her thoughts were rushing in and she felt scared. Her choices always left scars and she knew she'd have to make one soon enough and someone would get hurt. She sent Rachel a text

I'm sorry for tonight. My head is too full. Can you give me some space and time to process? I don't want to hurt you and I'm sorry I did tonight. I need to be sure I won't do that again, I hope you can understand. Q x

I hope you work things out soon because yes this is starting to hurt and I don't like that. Let me know when you are ready to talk. R x

xxx

As Rachel drove home she felt the ache in her chest once again, Quinn was so weak sometimes. All she had to do was stand up and believe her own heart. It hadn't taken much but she had fallen for her and now she felt such a fool. Quinn had more power than ever to hurt her and when she read the text she crumbled.

She didn't sleep so well that night, thoughts of Quinn consuming her once again and not in the good way that she had gotten used to. Scared Quinn was the worst kind she had met. Rachel resolved to respect the other girl's wishes and give her space, she needed some herself. It had been so much so soon, she had happily lived in the moment, but now things were shifting she realised she also had issues to process.

She avoided Quinn the following day as much as she could and when they did cross paths it was strained. Quinn just made an excuse and rushed past to talk to Santana. The pain on their faces was not easily hidden.

Rachel and Finn skipped Glee and practiced alone. Mr Schue thought it was best so they could concentrate on their vocal performance. Rachel was relieved that she didn't have to face Quinn and those piercing eyes, seeing her and not being able deal with their issues was just too much right now. Finn helped her escape into their performance. They worked hard to make it outstanding.

"How are things with Quinn?" he asked one day

"Fine, why?"

"I just noticed you two don't seem so close. Did something happen?"

"I'm just busy with Glee. We'll catch up soon enough"

"Sure. It's not because a certain someone has come between you?" he winked suggestively but Rachel missed it as she was looking at the flash of blonde she had just seen outside the window

"I have no idea what you are talking about Finn. Can we get moving now?"

"Sure Rach, you know I am here when you are ready"

"Ready?" she questioned but got no answer.

Xxx

Quinn felt herself falling apart. She missed Rachel, but she knew she would just want to kiss her and forget her problems if she saw her. She knew that wasn't fair. That she needed to work things out and be sure. Rachel deserved that much at least.

Every day at 3pm she walked past the choir room to catch a glimpse of Rachel and Finn rehearsing. She didn't linger, she just needed to see her. Their hallway encounters were just heart wrenching and she didn't like them one bit, but watching Rachel perform made her smile a little inside.

Her Mom was worried about her. Each night she felt that she was getting interrogated, so she just retreated to her room and stared at the ceiling. Nothing was becoming clear. Her thoughts were a mess and now her heart ached. She was miserable and she could tell her Mom and Rachel were too, but she felt powerless to do anything about it.

She heard a soft knock at her door

"Quinn can I come in?" she laughed lightly. Now her Mom asked permission.

"Sure"

"Is everything ok dear? I'm worried about you. Did you and Rachel fall out? Is it Finn?"

"20 questions much"

Her Mom just stared at her

"Sorry Mom, Rachel and I have some issues, that's all."

"Can I help? I am here if you need me Quinn, I can listen."

"I don't think so"

"Well I'm here. Just make sure you try and work things out with Rachel. I have never seen you so happy as you were when she was around. I hope it wasn't because of what I said at dinner. I was silly, I got nervous and rambled. Please know that much at least"

"So why did you say it? Why did you talk about her fathers and Kurt and his Dad like that?"

"I may be old Quinn but it doesn't make me wise. I make mistakes too. If I have caused you and Rachel troubles I will never forgive myself. I do think her parents are brave, I just didn't verse my thoughts well I guess"

"It's not just what you said Mom, it's how I handled it. I guess I hurt Rachel by not stopping you and well I am taking some time out to think things over because I don't want to hurt her again, I have not been nice to her in the past, i don't think I deserve her"

"Oh…and what does Rachel have to say?"

"Nothing. We are avoiding each other while I think"

"Doesn't she at least deserve to be a part of any big decisions you make about your um friendship? Is it fair you are the one that gets to choose alone?"

"Um maybe" Quinn shrugged

"Just be careful Quinnie. Rachel is lovely, but you can't play games with people. If you push her away you may find you push too hard and she finds herself another….um friend"

Her Mom left her alone and she finally started thinking clearly. The weekend passed and she was beginning to see what needed to be done.

xxx

Monday morning and Rachel was rushing to find Mr Schue about the vocal arrangement when she collided with Quinn. They both froze on the spot. Rachel could feel the warmth where Quinn's body had been touching hers for those brief seconds and the hot marks where those hands still held onto her arms. Her eyes locked onto Quinn's and she felt her breath hitch. She saw a blush on Quinn's cheeks before she hastily let go.

"Rachel" she spoke so softly that Rachel could barely hear her, but she did.

"I have to go. I have somewhere else to be." Rachel picked up the music she had dropped and headed on her way. At the end of the corridor she couldn't help herself, turning back to see Quinn watching her an amused grin plastered on her face, it only added to the confusion she already felt.

The next time she saw Quinn was rehearsals, she did her best to keep her eyes trained on Finn throughout their duet. But she could feel the other girl watching them intently. Whenever their eyes did meet Rachel missed a cue or a step. Quinn had that same amused look as she did in the hall and it was beginning to irritate Rachel. She stormed off at the end, desperate to escape the confusion that was raining down on her. It had been the closest they had been since dinner at Quinn's and she was surprised at how much it affected her.

A few moments later she felt Finn by her side.

"Coffee?" he asked

"Sure" she followed him out to the parking lot. Glee and Finn were all she could face right now.

Xxx

Quinn watched them leave and she couldn't help herself as she pulled out her phone

I miss you. Q x

She didn't have to wait long for a response.

Don't, just don't. Until you know for sure, just let me be. I have a competition to focus on and I can't deal with you being all hot and cold it hurts too much. R

She didn't send another message, she knew Rachel meant it and she knew she was right. Quinn had a plan she just needed to wait until Friday when they were finally going to be in New York.