Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer
Apologies for such a long chapter and the delay between postings.
To the mollusk shell amount of people who have read, reviewed / alerted and come out from self proclaimed lurking, many, many thanks.
This chap is fairly, um, explicit at times, note you've been warned. I hate warning about explicitness, it's all subjective, just like the rating system put forth on ffn.
Two location notes, the Northwoods refers to northern Wisconsin, people go musky fishing there, to name just one activity. Pilsen is a primarily Latino, mostly Mexican neighborhood just southwest of downtown Chicago.
Chapter Ten
I looked at the phone and headset and wondered what Bella had in store for me, I had an idea what it might be and hoped I was correct, but I didn't have time to ponder the possibilities so I grabbed my other phone and called Alice.
"Ali, you ready if I pick you and Jasp up in the next half hour?"
"Yeah, but listen, change in plans, Vicky's coming with us."
"Aw fuck, Alice, why's she coming with us?" Vicky and I had slept together a few times a couple of years ago. She was theatrical for the sake of attention, was a lousy lay but apparently she took our brief affair a lot more seriously than I did. She sidled up to Alice and tried to be best friends with her; Vicky kept showing up with Ali when she knew I would be at the same place. After a while, Alice thought it was funny and practically egged Victoria on, I finally told her she was being cruel to Vicky since I had no intention of going to that well one more time. I thought their friendship had fizzled out.
"I ran into her last week, I haven't seen her in like a lifetime or two, I thought it'd be fun to hang out. You're not still hung up on her, are you?"
"Quit fucking with me Alice, you know given the chance, ol' Vicky would've been riding her banana seat bicycle past my house just to run into me," I said, irritated.
"Whatever, I think you have revisionist history, but you're gonna have to get over it, she's already here."
"Fuck," I said, both to Alice and to the situation.
"Buck up asshole, this is the way it's going down. Pick us up by 4:00," and she hung up.
I went to reach for Bella's phone three times before finally finding my balls and dialing her number.
"Hellloo," she answered.
"Hey, babe," I sighed.
"What's wrong?" Her tone going from light to worried.
"I'm leaving in a few to go up north. But listen, there was a change in plans, Alice invited a friend with her."
Bella was silent for a minute working out the implication of my statement.
"A friend who's a girl?" Her tone was neither warm nor icy.
"Yeah," and I waited for Bella's response. After another couple of beats, she spoke again.
"I guess what you're trying to say, but apparently you're suffering from lack of balls, is that you've slept with this girl?" Her question was in no way rhetorical.
"A couple of years ago, it really wasn't anything, she made it a bigger thing than it actually was."
Bella was silent for a few moments before speaking again.
"Listen, I know I'm frustrating to you, not wanting to call this relationship, plus the fact that if we could even call it anything we couldn't due to our circumstances. I get it, it's maddening, and if you want to have something with this woman this weekend, um, I'm okay with it," she said plainly.
"What? No. I don't want anything with her, I just wanted to let you know that Alice changed plans on me," I tried to explain.
She was silent on the other end of the connection for a seemingly endless length of time.
"I would understand if you changed your mind, I don't want to deny you something you might want, with someone who hasn't put you in such a terrible predicament."
And here's what killed me about her offered option, she did it honestly and without malice. This was one of those rare and heartbreaking times where her ease of self was eclipsed by the miasma of this unfortunate state of affairs we were stuck with.
"I'm not changing my mind. We've chosen our path. We're it for one another, no Victoria or anyone else will change that."
Again, she was quiet. I laid it out for her as best I could. She was it for me, I mean, as best as I could tell, I didn't know long term or anything like that, I didn't think that way, but I awoke with her on my mind and I went to sleep with thoughts of her. Those weeks apart from Bella were excruciating and dark.
"Is that her name?" It seemed Bella was rolling this around to get a feel for it. "I've always found Victorias to be very formidable and stiff and lacking decent personalities."
I laughed at this, wanting to tell Bella how disappointing Victoria was in bed, despite her outward theatrics, but knew it would be in poor taste to do so even if my motive was pure.
"Easy, catty nails," I joked back, hoping we had eased away from the uncertainty of moments earlier.
"Meow."
"Will you miss me?" I was, as always, being greedy, a smile crossed my lips.
"Yes and no," what was this? "You have to wonder about my gift."
"Yes, but I have some thoughts what you might want to do with this gift."
"Oh, you do, huh, and here I thought I was being all Mata Hari."
"Any teasers what'll be in store for me?"
"Nope," she popped the "p," I was momentarily lost in thoughts of her lips. "I'll leave that to your imagination for the next 30 some odd hours."
"Bella, just so you know, you are rather successful at the role of femme fatale."
She lowered her voice, the timbre of it bringing back thoughts of days and nights spent together. "Just be careful driving up there and know I'll be thinking of you the entire weekend."
"Even with a houseful of people?" I didn't want this conversation to end.
"You might find that I'll be able to use the houseful of people to my advantage with you."
"I'm piqued and puzzled."
"Mmm, I like the word, piqued. Well, dear Edward, I don't want to keep you, please, just drive safely in your Vulva."
"I really wish you wouldn't call my car that, I feel inappropriate every time I get into it."
"Get into a vulva?"
"Okay, this stops now. I'll call you when I get there, probably won't be until like 10 or so."
"Edward?"
"Yes, Bella."
"I'll miss you, terribly."
"Me too."
I sometimes thought she was a tragic little Emily Dickinson poem locked up in a room too afraid to venture out into the world on her own. This was in total contrast to how she appeared to most, but I often wondered at these brief glimpses.
XX
I pulled up to Alice's place, irritated by Friday afternoon traffic and how fuckin' far west Logan Square was from me, the only good thing was it was close to expressway. I was pissed about Victoria and didn't want to be a gentleman and help her with, no doubt, an over packed bag. I laid on the horn and waited for them.
"Geez, manners much, asshole? Open the back, we need to put our bags in," Alice was sticking her head in the door and bitching at me.
"Alice, you're sitting up front with me, I need directions how to get there," I glared at her.
"Right, why should I?"
"Because I would've been a far nicer companion had we stuck to the original plan."
"Jasper will sit up front with you, I'll drive the second half, happy?" she sneered at me.
"Golly Alice, you're the best," sarcasm evident.
"Yeah, don't forget it either, asshole."
"Hi Edward," Victoria greeted me in a sing song voice and went to get in the front seat with me.
"Sorry, Vic, I need Jasper to co-pilot with me to get out of the city. How are you?" I amended, I couldn't be a complete jackass, it's not like she was the direct cause to her unwelcome inclusion.
Alice and Jasper joined Victoria in the car and I pulled out, heading for I-94.
"Oh, I'm so good Edward. Gah, it's been for-ev-er," she bounced her overly dyed red hair up and down punctuating the syllables.
"Yeah, it has been. So, what are you up to these days?"
She launched into the story of her and all of the past two years, I had been hoping she would just recap and give me highlights, not like a day to day blow of events. At one point I glanced over at Jasper and he had an amused look on his face knowing I was in pure hell.
"Wow, I don't even know what a, whaddya call it, what an esthetician does," I asked, less than mildly interested.
"Ohmygawd, it's so cool, I give facials, and facial massages and my fa-vor-ite thing, I give the be-eeessst bikini waxes, seriously when I get my license, I'm gonna tear it up!"
I cringed. "Yikes, you're gonna tear it up huh, how're your clients feel about that?" I glanced a look at Jasper who was shaking with quiet laughter. I wondered if he was high.
"Ohhh, Edward, you've always been so clever," she reached over and swatted my shoulder.
This woman was so vacuous it was painful, I was embarrassed that I ever spent any time with her. Jasper was going to be merciless in his teasing.
I felt my phone buzz in my pocket with a text message. As much as I wanted to see if it was Bella, I didn't want to suffer the inquiries from my car full of passengers.
"Your crotch is buzzing, pal," Jasper said, raising his eyebrows at me.
"Yeah, I'll get it later," I brushed him off.
"Yeah, I wouldn't mind a little humming in my pocket either," having dropped that lovely Jasperism, he tipped his head back and went to sleep.
We stopped outside of Madison to refuel, Alice took the keys from me.
"We're making good time, I'll drive the rest of the way."
"No, come on," I was loudly whispering to Alice even though Jasper and Victoria had gone in to get snacks. "Don't make me sit in back with her, that's just mean."
"Edward, you're the most dramatical, guy there is," she was mocking Victoria's loose interpretation of language. "Just get over it, it's not so bad. Maybe you could get your knob waxed while you're at it. You've been such a stick in the mud."
"I get my knob waxed fine."
"Don't lie, no one's seen you out in months, what're not telling me about?"
"Leave it alone, Alice." I knew that answer would do the exact opposite to Alice, she would gnaw on this like a dog with a bone.
We finished pumping gas and climbed into the car, Victoria sitting way too close next to me in the back seat.
"So, Edward, what're you doing these days?"
"Uh, I'm an English teacher."
"Yeah, at an all girl high school. Lucky fucker." Jasper answered, speaking on my behalf.
"Ooh, Edward, that sounds so in-ter-es-ting," Victoria tried to coo at me. I could have said I clean up elephant dung for a traveling carny and she would have tried to sound in-ter-es-ted.
"Yeah, uniform skirts and knee socks, the whole bit," Jasper said, leaning over the front seat to give more details. He's completely useless.
"Wow, Edward, all the girls must be sooo in love with you as their teacher."
I shake my head, not hiding my irritation well. "It's not like that at all Victoria, I'm just another teacher."
"Oh, no, Edward, if you'd been my teacher in high school I would have so totes had a thing for you," she ran her finger down from my ear to my jaw, I lean my head away, thoroughly disgusted.
She straightens back up on her side of the back seat and crosses her arms, practically sticking out her bottom lip to pout.
Alice looks at me from the rearview mirror, I'm hoping it starts to sink in what a bad idea this was.
"So Victoria, how much longer before you have your license?" I ask.
"I just need about 20 hours more of practical experience before I can get it. Oh Edward, you know what would sooo help me out? Can you ask the girls in your school if I can give them waxes?"
Was this girl mental?
"Uh, no, Victoria, that's really not appropriate." I was up shit's creek enough as it was.
"Shit, man, that would be so fucking stellar," Jasper shot up.
"Jasper!" Alice scolded him swiftly. "Are we going to have to have this talk again?"
"Sorry baby doll, I was just thinking-,"
"Yeah, Jasper, we all know what you were thinking and it's gross. If you pull this shit all weekend I'm leaving you out in the middle of the lake for the fucking muskies to feed off of you. "And you have another thing coming if you think I'm kidding you," bad mamajama Alice warned.
Jasper crossed his arms and turned to look out the window, a few moments later he peeked his head to look back at me and give me one of his bullshit smiles, like one mischievous fucking Peter Pan. Stupid douche.
Victoria has moved on to pimping Alice for bikini wax and electrolysis models, I have to wonder how desperate you have to be to skimp on one of those waxes? I shake my head to rid the thought and remember I have a text message I could be reading.
It's close to 7:00 PM, we were making good time, I forget how Alice drives like her foot is a fucking anvil, paying no mind to the state troopers lying in wait for out of town speeders. I pull out my phone and make it look like I'm scrolling through my messages, even though it's the new phone from Bella. I finally stop teasing myself and open her message.
-Hows your Vulva?
Despite the fact that I had asked her not to refer to my car this way, I can't help but to smile, I type a reply to her.
-Uh not sure how to answer that? Full and yet unsatisfied?
I silenced the phone so I don't draw the attention of anyone. Her response was quick.
-Shame, nothing worse than an unsatisfying vulva ride
This was bordering on the ridiculous, but since we so rarely were silly and almost carefree, I decided to go along with it for a bit. But then I thought about it and hoped she was teasing and not commenting on my abilities.
-U R kidding right?
She replied almost immediately. I had to keep up the pretense of looking disinterested to everybody else in the car so I stared out the window for a few beats before I couldn't stop myself and looked back at the screen
-Who are you and what have you done with my Edward?
I couldn't help myself, I smiled. Like a big, dumb goofy grin of a smile. She said, my Edward. I imagine she was joking around but I didn't care, I wanted to enjoy this for a moment. I didn't even think about the fact that this non-relationship was all sorts of wrong, I just thought about how I really liked her.
I paused for a moment, trying to decide how I wanted to reply, I looked out the window and saw that the pickup truck next to me had a bumper sticker that read, "If it flies, it dies." Yow, maybe that would be something that didn't need to be advertised on the back of a truck. I wondered if it just pertained to hunting or something else. But after assessing the gun rack and hunting dog in the back of the truck bed and the camo paint job, I figured it had to relate to birds, okay, I hoped it related to birds. Then I felt bad for thinking of birds that way. Fuck, why do people have to advertise their shit on their fucking car bumpers? I didn't need to know a one sentence outlook of a person's life.
I changed my focus back to Isabella.
-I am your Edward?
-Who else would be my Edward?
-I have no idea :)
-NO ONE ELSE – MEOW
Before I could even reply, she followed it up with another text.
-and that goes for vicky too!
-Can I call you later?
-Please xoxo B
I put my phone back in my pocket and tuned back to the discussion in the car.
"I think Lucy Liu," Alice said.
"No way, so Drew Barrymore, plus, I happen to know the girl in Cali who does her waxes," Victoria yammered on.
What the fuck were they talking about?
"What do you think, man?" Jasper looked back to me, eyebrows expectant.
"I wasn't paying attention, what're you three are talking about?"
"After Farah Fawcett, which Charlie's Angel has the best nipples, either generation of Angels," Alice explained from the driver's seat, looking in her rear view mirror to change lanes.
"What's your opinion, Jasp?" I asked. I knew who he was going to say, but I found it humorous when he puffed out his chest.
"Well, it just so happens, that that darlin' belle from the great State of Texas, Miss Jaclyn Smith, has some of the best nips, either side of the Mason - Dixon Line," he proudly spouted. He was an absolute tool. "And your take on the matter?" He leers to me.
"Hands down, no one even comes close to Farrah Fawcett. Carlisle still has her poster."
"No shit?" Alice asked, surprised by this tidbit.
"Yeah, it's hanging up in the back of his closet, I don't even know if Esme knows."
"Huh, that's pretty funny," Alice laughed. I somehow got the feeling next time Alice and Jasper were at Carlisle and Esme's, Jasper would find his way to the back of Carlisle's closet. Fuckin' freak.
The rest of the drive was passed talking aimlessly about movies and music. Alice discussing the merits and detractions of Lady Gaga's outfits, both as clothing of theatrics and of statement. Jasper, surprisingly arguing that Alice needed to qualify her meaning of statement, was it political, socio-economic, age related? After staring at Jasper briefly trying to figure out who planted that seed in his noggin, I went back to looking out the window, the length of the day having caught up with me.
X
"…Edward Anthony, we're hereee." I was awoken to Jasper's falsetto voice singing in my ear.
"Ugh, get outta here," I pushed his face away from me.
"Come on, shake tail, man, the ladies want to hit up Angry Minnow for a nightcap."
"Fuck man, I'm wiped, I'm just gonna crash."
"The hell you are, I do not want to deal with upset Alice tonight. You're hauling your ass there for at least a drink."
Shit, this was the last thing I wanted to do, but I knew Jasper was watching his back, as well as mine. Upset Alice was more than enough for an hour, unbearable for an entire evening and after more than a day, the world would seem to lack any and all gods and deities to take mercy on your broken and wretched soul.
"Alright," I got out of the back seat, stretched and went to grab the remaining bags and brought them in the house.
"Oh, Edward, looks like we're going to be neighbors," how predictable. This needed to change.
"Actually, Vicky, um, I'm gonna go upstairs," I stammered. "Uh, yeah, I have a uh, uh, deviated septum, I snore like a buncha bulldogs. I think it's best I just crash away from everyone else."
I watched as Victoria cocked her head to the side, processing what I just said to her. "Oh, yeah, you do totes snore, I remember that, viv-id-ly."
What the fuck? I just made that up.
"Yeah, sorry. Uh, I'm just gonna settle in then I guess we'll get going?" I was backing away from this awkwardness and going upstairs. I pulled out my phone and texted Bella.
-Do I snore
I hit send and waited to see if she would reply. After a few minutes, my phone vibrated with a response.
-Not unless Icky is asking then you snore like a broken down prizefighter
-You missed the V in vicky
I sent the message, once again enjoying this banter.
-Do you think I did?
Disregarding our earlier discussion, a jealous Bella was funny. I tapped a reply.
-Meow
-I would pee a ring around you if I could. Icky sounds like trouble
I dialed her number wanting to hear her voice before I had to spend time listening to Victoria stretch out words and Alice expel her snide comments. She picked it up on the first ring.
"Seriously, do I need to go up there and show that bitch the pecking order?" Bella answered the phone saying this.
"Easy free bird, there's no need to fret," I slid down against the inside of my bedroom door.
We were both silent, I was thinking about Bella and what it would be like to have her here with me. I heard rustling in the background of Bella's connection.
"Are you in bed already?" I asked her quietly.
"Talk to me, Edward," she says to me, just as quietly and a little breathily.
Fuck, phone sex. Bella's desires each time I was with her, proved to be more boundless, once again I wondered how I won the sexual lotto.
"What do you want me to say?"
"Tell me how to feel, where to touch, what you want to do to me the next time we see each other."
"Fuck," I breath out, this girl goes from zero to en fuego in the lick of a lip.
"Come on, Edward, tell me what to do, I want you to bring me off, tell me everything," her soft and breathy voice building my confidence.
"What are you doing?"
"I'm in bed and I'm taking off your t-shirt, you know the one, it says, 'half pack of cigarettes and a ten dollar bill.'" It also had a picture of a woman leaning against an old car from the 1950's. The picture oozed the repressed sexuality of Playboys hidden between mattresses and silk stockings held up by garter belts.
"Do you have any clothes on?"
"Just a tank top and a pair of panties."
I paused, picturing this perfectly. It wasn't so much that it was hot what she said, but the mix of familiarity, the combination of a man's tank top and a woman's pair of lace and silk panties, the contrast of genders to make her look so completely arousing. I refocused my thoughts back to Bella.
"I want you to take your hand, starting at you hip bone," fuck if her hip bones weren't sexy, "and travel it up, slowly underneath your tank," speaking slowly, I gave her a moment to start the movement. "Do you feel how soft your skin is? Take your hand and cup your breast, feeling that perfect weight. In your mind, picture me doing this to you. See how I look up at you and then back to your breasts, thankful that I'm with you and it's me that gets to touch you like this."
I hear her take a quick intake of breath and let out the smallest of moans.
"Now, since I wouldn't be able to tolerate having anything in the way, take off your shirt."
I hear more rustling as she removed her shirt. She doesn't say anything once she's removed the top, all I hear are her gentle pants of her getting more and more worked up.
"Tell me, Edward, what else would you do to me?" She whispered into the mouthpiece like she's telling me treasonous affairs.
I find it more and more difficult to ignore the pulsing ache of my cock. This is about Bella, I keep telling my body, hoping it would follow my will.
"I would take both hands and feel your nipples, do that, Isabella," I punctuate the syllables in her name, "give them each a sharp pinch, feel the pleasurable pain radiating out for those few moments."
She lets out a short, strained whimper. I knew she was worked up. I wished I was there to physically be part of it, but guiding and directing her on the phone was proving to be a new and exciting fold in our sexual deeds.
I could feel my breaths raising and lowering my chest.
"What I would do now is bend over and lick and suck and bite your nipples because I wouldn't be able to hold myself back any longer. I'd bring my tongue to a point and circle them and watch as your eyes would close and your head tip back trying to grab your breast with your own hands, but I would stop you. And do you know what else you would be doing underneath me, Isabella," again, I said her name in a slight staccato.
"What would I be doing, Edward," as she always managed to do, she said my name like the nectar of sticky honeysuckle, forbidden to most except the delicate hummingbird.
"You would be writhing underneath me, your body urging me to explore lower. You'd want my fingers to see if you were wet for me, to touch your lips and feel how your arousal had swelled them, to gather your wetness and circle your clit and to feel your hips rhythmically raise and lower, urging, no, begging me to give you what you want." I'd be lying to say I wasn't enjoying this immensely, the ego boost of hearing Bella's breathing on the other end of the line, it was almost as good as when she talked dirty to me during sex. "Go ahead, Bella, take your hand and travel it back down the center of your chest, across your abdomen down, down, down over the top of your panties," after giving her this directive slowly, I added on one more task. "Tell me, are your panties wet?"
"Oh, God, yes, Edward, they're so wet. It's all for you, Edward, all for you," her voice still barely above a whisper, the quiet desperation seeping out at the edges. I could picture her squirming, squeezing her thighs together to gain some sort of pleasure of touch.
"Take them off," I demanded. I waited while I heard her move to remove the silk and lace triangles. "Tell me, are you naked?"
"Yes, completely."
"How do you feel?" I could feel the stillness hanging in the air. The question bearing down upon her, she was searching for the right response. I felt the string tighten between us when I knew she had come upon it, her quivering, strung so tight with that one word. I held my breath, waiting for her to say it.
"Exposed," she declared, equal parts salacious and expectant in her tone.
"Good, that's the way I want you," I mused for her. "Now, take your middle finger and bring it to your opening, wait, rather, tease yourself a bit, bring that finger back up to your clit and circle there a few times. Use your wetness, the wet I created from my voice, my words, all for you."
"More," she whispered again and I knew she was getting close, this was not so much mutual satisfaction but pure hedonistic motivation, and yet, I was probably enjoying myself just as much as she was. "More, Edward, I need more, let me have more," she gently demanded of me.
It was here when I understood how she held all of the power. She controlled everything. She knew I wanted to please her, how I wanted to bring her to climax, how she was directing me in directing her. I marveled in her abilities.
"What do you want baby, tell me, do you want to use both hands?" My breathing was as heavy as hers.
"Yes."
I told her to take her two fingers and enter herself with them, and taking her other hand, to gather some of her lubrication and start circling her clit. Her breathing became more like wind whistling.
"Baby, are you biting your lip," I so wanted to take my thumb and drag it down her chin and watch how her plump, full bottom lip released back to that slightly puckering shape that her mouth held naturally.
"Yes. Oh, oh, Edward, I'm close, come on, tell me what to do, uhh, I'm so close."
"That's right, baby, come on, ride it out for me. I want you to taste yourself for me. That's what I get to taste when I bend down and kiss your beautiful sex, when I make my tongue, again, into that point that you like so much and lap up your satisfying and incomparable flavor. The way you're bringing your fingers in and out of your core, the ways your walls are beginning to tighten and flutter and pulse, imagine my cock getting to feel that movement, to know you're reacting to us and what we do to each other."
"Edward, don't stop, I'm, oh, oh, Edward, that's it," and she trails off. I know her earpiece has come off, but I can hear her gasping breaths and whimpers and moans, and it has to be one of the hottest things I've ever heard in my entire fucking life.
Then, completely removing me from my own little piece of utopia, there's fucking pounding on my door. I cover my phone and remain seated against the door.
"Come on, guy, we're leaving," Jasper says through the two inches of hickory wood.
"Go without me, I'll meet you three there."
"Don't fuckin' ditch me, assprick," and Jasper lays one more pound on my door. I can tell he's paused there trying to figure out what I'm doing before he finally walks away. I pick up my phone to see if Bella is still there.
"Well, lover, that was unexpected," Bella says to me slow, full of pleasured contentment, and a hint of humor.
"Was it? Seems like you had this planned," I joke back with her.
"No, I didn't," she responds quietly, slightly embarrassed maybe. "I just heard your voice and realized how much I missed you and wanted the next best thing to having you beside me."
"Mmm, maybe we can remedy this on Sunday night," I said it before even thinking it through, maybe Phil and her mom would be home and she couldn't come over, or I couldn't go over to see her. Even though she was in high school, I wondered if she could move out, I mean, she was 19, technically she didn't have to live at home.
"Do you want me to help you right now? You have to, uh, you know, be hard and all."
Well, I was, but I knew I had to meet up with my group, otherwise I'd settle in for some long distance lovin'.
"No, I'll take care of it, I gotta go meet my group of misfits for a drink. Can I call you later?"
"Mmm, sorry pumpkin, I'm going to sleep now, I've gotta pick up Angie tomorrow by 8:00 and go to Pilsen to get the sugar skulls and sweets, papel picados and marigolds, then Jess is coming over to help us set everything up, and Emmett and some of his friends are coming by after the game to do the sound for the DJ," she went through this list somewhat lazily. Cripes, how big was this party? "I should have asked you if you wanted to give me pictures of your parents, I'm sorry, Edward," Bella said suddenly, honest remorse present in her tone.
"That's okay," I felt awkward, this wasn't a topic that was brought up often, if ever. "Thank you for asking, though," I replied, stiffly. "Hey, why are you having this party with Jessica and Angela?" The question had plagued me since she told me about the party last Sunday. I guess I knew she hung out with Angela, but Jessica Stanley was random, at best. I wanted to tell Bella of the times I heard Jessica speak unkindly of her but figured this wasn't the time.
Bella still hadn't answered my question and I realized I put her in an uncomfortable position.
"You don't have to answer that, sorry, that wasn't right of me to ask," I said, hastily, trying to make up for my poor manners.
"Oh, no, um, Jess's mom died when Jess was in eighth grade, and Angela, um, her older brother, Joe, died in Afghanistan two years ago, he was, ah, he was in the Army."
"Oh," was all I could think of to say.
"Listen," Bella said suddenly, "you better go and get ready to go hang with Miss Icky and her merry band of misfits, we can talk tomorrow."
I let out a forced laugh. "Yeah, you're right, I should get going. I'll, uh, I'll talk to you tomorrow. 'Bye."
"Good night, Edward," Bella said sweetly and ended the call.
After that odd exchange I didn't really have much of a need to take care of myself anymore, so I went and splashed some water on my face and left to go meet everyone at the bar.
While I walked up the driveway, the woods lining my path, I thought about Bella's party. I knew she said her mom had started this as a way to meet her classmates, but why this holiday in particular? I mean if Bella's mom was so anti-commercialism when it came to holidays, why would she have selected a holiday celebrating people who've died? I felt, as I increasingly did with Bella, that I wasn't getting the full story. Shit, I just spent 20 minutes getting her off on the phone, telling her to touch herself in her most private places and I don't even know if I know when her fuckin' birthday is, or even her middle name. Everything is always filled in with sex. Alright, maybe I shouldn't be so hasty. Shit, I mean, I think I was willingly wrapped around this girl's bitty finger. And, if I was being truthful, and I might as well be since I was practically talking out loud to myself, I didn't mind. I was risking my family's reputation, my future, the name of St. Jude's, and I'd do it all again just to have what we have, intellectually and sexually. I kicked these varying thoughts around in my mind while I crossed the idle road and walked along the rural route towards the Angry Minnow.
Why was I so attracted to her, to the point that I put all good judgment on hold? And it's not like it was just because of the way she looked and how she was in bed, or a bar or pinball game or whatever, okay, yeah, that was kinda big thing, for 19 years old she was quite experienced and adventuresome. And how did that come about?
I marshaled my thoughts back in place, I was almost to the bar and I knew my brow was furrowed and my mind filled with more gaps and questions than when I left home, but I had to act like the rest of them, slug down a few beers and talk about back hair waxes, gap years and fight off Jasper's unwittingly cutting remarks about my job.
XXX
Fuck if I don't feel like my tongue has grown hair.
I grabbed my phone and saw it was edging past noontime, I know we stumbled home and left the car at the bar. We tried to teach Victoria how to play Spades but she kept trying to pretend fall asleep on my shoulder. I knew Alice was watching, trying to figure out why I wasn't taking the easy bait of Victoria. I suppose, in times past, I might have drank less and taken the Victorias or Tanyas or some other nameless girl back to my room instead of playing cards until dawn's early light with my sister and her boyfriend. I tried to distract everyone by producing Carlisle's key to his liquor cabinet, which was really too large to be called a cabinet, it was more like a liquor pantry. And the key was leftover from our high school days, or maybe it was still there because of Esme, I couldn't be certain which.
I got up, showered and changed into some running clothes, I figured I could get the car and stop for some coffee. And maybe a cheeseburger. And onion rings. Possibly I'll get a Big Gulp too. And a bag of Ruffles. Or Doritos. And some dip. I could go with a doughnut. Chocolate doughnut. With colored sprinkles. I take my phone and send Bella a text.
-Why does everything fried taste good when hung over
She writes back quickly.
-Because good judgment is still in the bottom of a bottle
She then sent me two more in quick succession.
-Don't get fatty on me Cullen
-Or be a drunky either
I laughed, pushing the questions from last night out of my head. I went about town getting provisions for the group and returned to see Alice and Jasper looking limp and beat down, laying around like lifeless Sea Monkeys waiting to be placed in some brine to reanimate, the back wall of solid windows acting like a giant fish bowl for them.
"Dude, good call," Jasper rasped out. Alice just stuck her arm out not bothering to open her eyes, I obliged them both, handing over coffees.
"Ooh, Edward, so yummy!" Victoria trilled, bouncing into the room, overly done up and looking completely at odds from the Northwoods setting.
"Morning, Vicky," I said, handing her a cup of coffee. Jasper and Alice made no move off the couch. Fuckers. I had no intention of entertaining Alice's guest.
"So, what are we doing today?" I think Victoria swallowed Tigger and Roo, she was so bouncy.
"I don't know, what did you have planned, Alice?" I wasn't about to drive this ship.
With undisguised effort, Alice opened her eyes, flashed me her common look of pure, absolute evil before turning to look at Victoria, I saw her eyes widen at Vicky's out of place appearance, I struggled to contain my amusement at the situation.
"Well, Vick," Alice began; she sounded like she swallowed a bag of tree bark. "What do you feel like doing?"
"Oh, I don't know, I mean, what's there to do around here? Maybe go to a casino? Can we go shopping?"
"Not unless you want fishing lures and flannel," I explained of both scenarios.
"Oh," Victoria said, deflated.
"Why don't we all go for a walk in like an hour, we can go down to the water then check out the woods, maybe see if Paul's home," I offered the group, knowing no one else would speak up.
"Two hours," was Alice's annoyed reply.
Fuck if I would fill two hours with Vicky.
"Okay, well then I'm going to catch up on some work and I'll meet you three back here," and I hauled ass out of there, not wanting to get sucked into the vortex of lazy Alice hangover land.
I took a copy of my junior class's book, and went and got a chaise lounge and set it up at the waterfront. Although the weather was grey, and all of the fall color had already been pulled from its branches by vigorous winds, it was good to just sit and be away.
I drifted off, my mind blank from the buzzing of my questions of Bella from last night. I awoke when I felt a chill settle over me, Alice had come out and stood in front of the weak sun blocking any warmth that was trying to come through.
"Are we ready to go?"
She looked at me, not saying anything; it was like she was surveying me, as if I were a puzzle and she was trying to find the corner pieces to anchor me to the tabletop.
"What's up?" I finally asked, uncomfortable with her gaze.
"What's up with you? Scoot over," she motioned her hand so she could sit on the lounge with me. I offered it to her and moved another one out for me. I didn't want to be sandwiched next to her; I was leery of her inquiry.
"What're you talking about?" I tried to stall an inquisition.
She looked thoughtfully at me again. Gone was her normal malice and taunt.
"Are you seeing someone?" She asked, dead on.
"What does it matter?" I answered another of her questions with a question.
She looked at me and sighed, got up and started to walk away.
"I packed a picnic, come and help me carry it, we can eat it on our hike," was all she said, and went back to the house.
XX
"What kind of tree is that?" Vicky pointed to her third oak tree, it's not like oak trees shed their leaves, you've see one, you've seen them all.
All three of us answered, "Oak."
"Oh," she answered, dizzily, "I guess I already asked that, sorreee."
"I'm gonna kill her," Jasper said under his breath to no one in particular."
"Not if I get there first," Alice said, not so under her breath.
"Jesus, man, can't you just sleep with her to give us a reprieve?" Jasper asked me.
"She was Alice's invite, maybe Alice should hit that," I gestured my chin in Vicky's direction. She had walked ahead of us and bent down to pick up a dry, brown leaf and examine it as if she were an expert botanist.
Jasper turned to Alice, his face filled with undisguised glee.
"Jasper, I swear, if you say anything about hitting anything I will knock you so hard you'll wind up in the middle of next week."
"Yeah, but darlin', a redhead!"
"Not natural," I noted.
"Oh," both Alice and Jasper responded, surprised. I was a little creeped out at their mutual disappointment.
We continued on our walk, answering Victoria's oak tree question two more times before Alice told her that all the trees in the forest were oaks. It wasn't the case, but apparently Vicky was too much of a simpleton to differentiate between shapes and colors. I feared for any woman who asked to get their pubes waxed into a heart or a triangle, or any other basic design.
We made our way back to the house and all settled in up from the shore while Jasper and I built a bonfire. It was ridiculously cold out, but the last of the fall scented air and smell of the hardwood in the fire eased everyone's discordant feelings and made us comfortable and content. We sat there silent, watching the flames dance around the logs until it moved in to consume each piece.
"Edward, why did you become a high school teacher?" Victoria asked me, her ditzy persona replaced with a calm and thoughtful one. Maybe this was what attracted me to her?
"Um, I guess I did it for Esme. You know, she's involved with St. Jude's, she went to high school there, so did Alice," I looked towards Ali and saw her eyes were closed, leaning back against Jasper's chest, his arms wrapped around her. "They had a last minute need for an English teacher and I interviewed and they hired me. I'm not all that qualified, really, other than I read and was a substitute teacher last year."
"You don't really sound like you like it," Victoria observed.
"Not really, no, I hope they can fill my position next year with someone who wants to teach, someone who has a gift for it. It's not my calling."
"You just seemed like you were destined for something arty," she said, thoughtfully.
I looked at her, the glow from the fire lighting our circle, and I saw how profoundly lonely she was. The lack of hope in her eyes was now as clear as if she were wearing a sign around her neck announcing the fact. It all sort of made sense, her dim act, the exaggerated outfits and makeup and hair, the neediness; she was lonely and she wanted a mate to love her. It was too bad that along the way to find that love, she probably lost her original essence.
"So, are you doing what you want to do?" It was the best thing I could think of to say to her. I didn't want to engage in some great heart to heart conversation with her, but right or wrong, I felt sort of sorry for her. I'm certain she didn't want my pity, whether or not she had ever admitted her loneliness to herself, I didn't want to give her an offer of false friendship.
"Oh, I don't know if anyone sets out to give bikini waxes as a career goal, I don't know, maybe some do. But, truth be told, I'm pretty good at it, people like my enthusiasm, it's nice when people tell me they like my work, so for now I'm happy with it."
She talked some more about how she went to school for it and the friends she's made, I started to tune her out a little bit, I mean, I felt kinda sorry for her, but the fact still remained that she was rather tedious.
Somewhere during the great knuckle hair debate and the trials and tribulations of spirit glue and sequined merkins, I asked Jasper when he wanted to go pick up dinner. He opened his eyes, and to my surprise, took pity on my situation and said we needed to go now before the place closed.
"She's gabby," Jasper commented once we had gotten in the car.
I didn't say anything regarding Victoria, I didn't want to give an avenue to tease. "What're you hungry for?"
"I don't know, doesn't matter," instead of driving to the restaurant nearby, Jasper took his time and drove to the next town over, giving me a respite from being polite.
"So what's happening with you, man?" Jasper asks after we've been on the road for several miles.
"Nothing, same old," I say noncommittally. As with Alice earlier this day, I am uncomfortable by this line of questioning. And fortunately I am interrupted by my phone ringing from my coat pocket, I look and see Alice calling.
"Hey Edward, Vicky wants a salad, and get some more beer, I think Jasper drank the last of it this morning."
"Got it, let me know if we need anything else," I answered, ended the call and slipped the phone back in my coat pocket.
Jasper and I ran our errands, replenished the beer supply and got a new deck of Bees for another attempt at cards with Vicki and were heading back home when Bella's phone vibrated in my pocket. Not thinking, I pulled the phone from my pants and looked at the text.
-Party's starting I'm gonna call you later
Jasper was looking over at me with a look I couldn't place, questioning maybe?
"What, why're you looking at me like that?" I ask him.
"You have two phones?"
Fuck.
I didn't want to lie, and yet, what could I say, it was a gift from a student?
"Yeah, I'm just trying it out," it sounded stupid even to my ears.
Jasper just looked at me before turning his eyes back to the road. I saw, from the corner of my eye, him open and close his mouth silently, trying to search for the words he wanted to say to me.
"Are you having an affair?"
I kept looking ahead, not saying anything and not moving, I didn't want to invent a lie, I hoped my silence would drop the subject.
"It's a married woman, isn't it? That hot little neighbor?"
I think I caught a break here. I continued to keep my mouth shut. Technically I wasn't lying, it was juvenile to think I wasn't being dishonest, but the truth wasn't much better, if Jasper wanted to think I was sleeping with Gianna De La Pena, that made things easier for my situation.
"Alright, man, I get it, I won't say anything."
He went back to his silence, driving along the dark road.
"So is she good? Is it true what they say about, whaddya call 'em, Cougars, you know, that they're on the prowl?"
I just stared at him. I was truly dumfounded by his inane babbling.
"Quit reading Cosmo, asshole," was all I could say to him. He shut up but held a shit eating smirk on his face, a whole cat and canary scenario.
"Took you guys long enough," was Alice's greeting. I immediately saw Jasper give her a pointed look, and I knew the next time they were alone he was going to spill the untrue beans. I felt kinda shitty about misrepresenting Mrs. De La Pena, I mean, she always smiled to me and asked how things were going, but for now, she was a good cover, I made a note to give Gianna and her husband, a nicer bottle of Scotch for Christmas this year.
Sitting around, eating and playing cards, I was restless, although, cards went better this time around, one of Jasper's more surprising traits was his patience, he taught Vicky to play Spades well enough to beat Alice and I the first round. After that it was girls against boys, Alice wasn't happy the second time she got beat, stomping off to go put a movie in and leaving the idea of a group activity behind. Jasper and Vicky followed suit a short while later and I hung back, trying to make an easy exit away from this group that was becoming stifling.
It was after midnight when my phone buzzed. I had slipped it in my back pocket to avoid the vibrating noise being noticed.
"I'm gonna knock out, I'll see you guys in the morning," I said casually and eased myself out of the room. They were all in their cups for the most part anyway, but I wanted to look as mundane as possible, Alice and Jasper's interest in my life this weekend was unwelcome.
I looked at the message sent to me.
-cum on and call me luvah
Odds were, Bella was drunk, she was rarely so blatant in her sexuality, she was, as Emmett had crudely, yet succinctly described, the girl who would cook a pot roast and play Scrabble with your parents, but she would take you out behind the garage and fuck you stupid. Regardless of her state of inebriation, I still wanted to talk to her.
"Hello," she answered, saying her greeting slowly. The sound of her voice brought a quick flash of heat across my chest, a mixture of desire and thrill.
"Hey babe, how's the party?" I could hear the DJ and laughter barely suppressed in the background.
"It's good," she paused, I could tell she was not interested in an events replay. "Emmett nearly punched a guy out for making a lewd proposition at me," she told me this incident like she was telling me about the weather, and she said it like proposishon.
"Remind me to thank Emmett for guarding my lady's reputation," I said with a certain amount of bitter sarcasm, I was angry I couldn't be there, and angry Emmett had to stand in my stead to defend Bella.
"Mmm, don't be jealous, I'm yours until you no longer want me," she stated offhandedly. And if I thought a little harder about it, it was a sad way she put it, like she felt I was going to cast her aside at some point, like if I got bored or felt she was no longer the forbidden fruit.
"I want you," I assured in a low voice. I was going to add always, but didn't. I slipped on the Bluetooth Bella had given me on Friday.
"I like that sentiment," she hummed slightly.
"Do you now, tell me, why?"
"At this moment, speshifically?" She asked, rhetorically, and continued on. "Because I want to repay you for my climax yesterday, it was, um, speshial," her liquor consumption evident again.
"And how did you want to repay me?" I was drawing this out, and although the party surrounding her was keeping at a steady din, I knew I was her primary focus.
"I want you to take off your pants to begin with," her voice thick. "Then I want you to remove your lawyer boxers and tell me what your cock looks like."
I stood up, away from the back of the door where I had been sitting and leaning against it as I had the night before. I started to unbutton my fly, "talk to me," I said.
"Mmm, well, if I were there right now, I would pull you closer to me by grabbing the waistband of those soft, blue Levis I like seeing you in. The way they hang just low enough off your hips and I am the lucky one that gets to see where that luscious trail of hair leads to, and your ass always looking practically illicit in them, I'd most definitely be punished because I wouldn't be able to stop myself from bending over to take a bite out of it." I licked my lips and swallowed thickly at the thought.
"So tell me lover, how's your cock?" Any slurred speech was now gone, her intent clearly focused. I continued to hear the steady beats from the DJ's endeavors.
"It's hard," I breathed out, not even trying to be clever in my description.
"Is your cock so hard I would have to put my mouth around it to give you some pleasurable relief, or is it just hard enough I could tease you and draw out our mutual titillation," she gently accentuated each syllable. She answered her own question. "I think I can draw this out a bit," she paused here and I imagined she was tapping her front teeth with the tip of her index finger trying to come up with an idea of how to bring about heightened arousal.
"What would you be wearing?" I asked, picturing in my mind's eye the scenario playing out in various locations; my bed, or the small continent sized bed of Bella's, the deck outside the 3rd floor loft of this house, my kitchen, lounge chairs poolside in my apartment building. I decided on my bed since that's where we had started out, where I could smell her scent on my pillows and sheets, where she would tuck in next to me once we had finally decided to go to sleep. I locked the door to my bedroom and settled atop the duvet.
"Well, there's a question," she said, thinking over her response before settling on an image. "I would be wearing one of your white dress shirts, having had to put it on in haste that morning because I couldn't be late for class or be out of uniform, I wouldn't have wanted to have to serve a detention," my breathing sped up. I knew I shouldn't be excited by the scenario she had just set forth, but fuck if I could stop myself. She continued on with her luxurious torture.
"The French cuffs would have been rolled over, and underneath, my bare breasts would have been rubbing against the fabric all day, my nipples straining by the continuous stimulation," I continued to hear the music and voices in the background. I had grabbed some KY and was stroking myself by the sound of her voice and the tenor of her story.
"The only thing I would have on underneath your oversized shirt would be those lacy cerulean," I pictured the movement of her lips when she said that word, "blue panties you like so much, a second pair since you ripped the first one," she said contemplatively. I recall making no apologies for that action. "You would reach over and undo, each and every button, but leaving the shirt on me, it would hang open showing the inside curve of my breasts, my belly button and my panties. I would push you down on your bed and starting at your nipples, I would take my tongue and circle them, then give each one a little open mouthed kiss. Again, I would alternate between my tongue and my lips, down your sternum, the geometry of your abdomen, down to that slightly darker, thin path of hair that leads me to your glorious cock, my hair like a comet's tail following my tongue's path. And I would take a moment to bask in the glory of your resplendent cock, licking my lips like it was a tall drink of water after a journey through an arid desert."
I ran my thumb over the sensitive tip of my penis before bringing my hand back to stroke the hardened shaft. I said nothing, waiting for Bella to continue her narrative.
"I would take my lips, not wanting to deny the pleasure to either you or me any longer and would lean over and give you a kiss, right on the tip and then underneath, snaking my tongue out, licking over, oh so slowly," she dragged out this group of words, "your slit before circling around the ridge," I increased the speed of my strokes, again taking my thumb up to the tip, the background music and noises all but fading away, my focus solely on her voice.
"Then I would take as much as I can of you in my mouth, my tongue licking up the underside, along that strong, throbbing vein, my hands stroking and twisting. And because I would be feeling so high from the very essence you, I would let out a deep hum of satisfaction all around you, my eyes closed in pure, unadulterated pleasure. Taking my mouth, I move up your length, back to the head and would spend several pleasurable minutes there, licking, sucking, enjoying," my eyes were closed themselves, intent on Bella's words and pictures she was spinning, reliving private moments from our summer spent together.
I heard her walking, the music and other revelers fading as she climbed a set of stairs, all the while keeping up her softly spoken creation.
"Are you close, Edward," she murmured into the phone.
I took a slightly gasping inhalation of air at the sound of my name, "Yes," I answered, my balls beginning to tighten.
She sighed wantonly, "Oh, Edward, I sit in that classroom and stare at your mouth, at your lips, I think about how your tongue has tangled with mine, how every inch of my body has been covered by your delicious lips and mouth. The way my nipples respond to the lightest of touches from you, how just the sound of your voice makes my panties wet from arousal, every day I leave class with all of my nerve endings tingling and taut, it takes everything within me not to lock that classroom door and push you against that wall and open your pants and take your hard cock out -."
"Bella," I saw it, it was like a movie playing out in my head. The fact of the matter was, I wasn't certain if what she was telling me was a complete fantasy or a desire, something she might put in play, but at that moment the cinema was going full throttle. I stroked myself two more times before letting out a guttural sound, Bella's short breaths helping to push me over the edge, impermissible thoughts pushed aside to be dealt with later.
"How are you?" Bella asked after a while.
"You have to ask?" I teased.
She was quiet before speaking again.
"I'm in my room, looking at that picture of you," and she chuckled.
"What are you laughing about?" I asked, lazily.
"I sound like a Cure song," and she started to hum that song, badly.
I laughed in response. "Can I see you tomorrow night, can you get out?"
"Umm, yeah, actually, you could come over here, if you want."
"What about Phil and your mom?"
"I'll have the house to myself. No baseball players, no Rosalie, no Emmett, just me," her voice was lilting.
"Sounds good, I'll call when I'm back in the city.
We hung up, I got off my bed, took a shower and dressed in some basketball shorts and a t-shirt Sr. Cope had given me a couple of years ago, it said, "I got a peek at the Pope!" She had gotten the shirt just after she entered the abbey as a novice. The Pope was coming to Chicago and she had gone down to attend the public mass, she described it saying it was chaotic as it was when she saw the Rolling Stones in the early Seventies. She bought the shirt but had never worn it and gave it to me knowing of my collection. I kinda wondered if she got a shirt from the Stone's concert.
I went down to the empty kitchen, to the closet and found my heavy parka and the pack of smokes I had tucked in there last winter, no doubt they were stale, but I was craving the taste of tobacco, jacking off with Isabella was great, but without having her sleeping next to me I was restless. I stepped out onto the deck and lit up.
It was cold, I pulled the parka hood up over my head and looked out over the craggy beach and out onto the water. The thoughts from the night before returned to my mind, wondering about Bella and about her party. I couldn't call her now, too risky and the party was no doubt still going full force. I sat and thought about it a while longer before going back inside and going to sleep.
XXX
"Hey babe," I said to Bella when she answered her phone.
"Hello, Edward," she said sounding like she was comfortable.
"Still hungover?"
"Not really. Emmett made Bloody Mary's for brunch, hair of the dog and all. And by brunch, I mean Emmett went to Lou Mitchell's and brought back like three pages of the menu. Have you seen that guy eat, it's like an Olympic event, I was afraid if we put our fingers too close to his mouth you'd be calling me stumpy," I could hear the humorous disdain in her voice. "Anyway, greasy cheeseburger and French toast pulled me through."
"You still want me to come by?"
"Is Emmett a mastodon? Yes, come by, do you still remember the code for the back gate?"
"Yeah, I'm gonna stop home, I'll be over in an hour."
X
I got out of the cab a house over from Bella's, I knew I was being a little covert ops and all, but we're a city of neighborhoods, people see what's going on, why take the chance?
I approached the back door and it opened without me knocking, Bella stood to the side and ushered me in.
And her lips were on mine, her hands moving up to my hair, I grabbed her hips picking her up, she wrapped her legs around my waist.
After a couple of desperate minutes, I broke off the kiss and pulled back, searching her eyes for some type of clue who she was, why she acted like this and anything else I could gleam.
The car ride back from Wisconsin had been mellow, the radio tuned to an AM station while we listened to the football game. I spent the time thinking more about Bella, about how little I knew of her life, debating the fact that I had never made a huge effort to learn about her and the times I had ventured to do so, being distracted by her casual changing of subjects.
Of course, I couldn't see any of the things I searched for in her eyes, the chestnut marbling was a thick veneer, offering no insight into her life's story. It was stupid of me to think I could learn anything without asking.
I set her back down to the ground. She whined.
"Did you eat?" I asked, not wanting to overwhelm her with my questions hoping I could ease into it in some way that might present itself. I didn't really have a plan.
She looked at me, a cross of hurt and anger and trepidation.
"Is there something you want to tell me?" she asked, solemnly.
"Well, yeah, kinda, I mean, I wanna ask you something, why, what's on your mind?" her look had become placid.
She narrowed her eyes slightly before fixing her gaze on something across the kitchen.
"You slept with Victoria, didn't you? That's why you're over here," her eyes moved back to mine, remaining flat.
"What? God no, nothing like that at all," it was all I could say. If I was less singularly focused I would have been offended.
Her shoulders relaxed slightly, but her gaze remained tight.
We stood there in her kitchen like we were sizing the other up, the defensiveness permeating the air thickly. What the fuck, this is how I get derailed each time, usually by the desire to be buried balls deep in Bella that I paid no heed to the diversion.
"Do you want to go upstairs?" Bella offered. Well fuck yes I did, but willed myself to change the subject.
"Can we get something to drink, you know, I have stuff at my place," I was stupid to come over here, I should have done this in my home.
She shook her head, remembering her manners.
"I'm sorry, what do you want to drink? Um, there's whiskey, scotch, well, pretty much everything. Even Goldschlager and Green River, Emmett thought you might want some," she smiled weakly.
The mood had shifted. To what, I wasn't certain, but the defensiveness was ebbing away.
"A beer?"
Bella went and got me a drink, a soda in her hand she led me into the living room. Jasper was right, this place was insane with baseball, leather and warm colors. I walked around more or less pretending to look at all of the memorabilia, and ephemera displayed. This wasn't a collection as a shrine to all things baseball. I figured if I looked around long enough I would find a Honus Wagner baseball card hanging in a frame on the wall and a baseball from the 1908 World Series.
"What's on your mind, Edward?" Bella asked, making it easy on me and giving me an in to ask her the question that had been weighing so heavily on my mind for the past two of days.
I walked back over to the couch, taking one more drink from my beer, I set it down on the coffee table and turned towards Isabella.
"Bella, your party this weekend has left me wondering about you."
She just looked at me, unblinkingly, again her eyes were blank.
"I just, I just was wondering why you have a party celebrating people who've died? I mean, from the way you've described your mom, it sounds like she doesn't hold much with holidays, I just wonder why this holiday is something you celebrate each year. And you know, I saw you the other day at mass, and you had been crying, what are you not telling me?" My voice was not as strong as I wanted it to be, but I had stammered through my most forthright question and hoped to get an answer, bad or good.
Bella took in a deep breath, holding it momentarily before letting out a long sigh.
"It's a shame you're so observant," she said intending it to be primarily to herself, she shook her head briefly. "You remember that car accident I told you about, with my leg and all?"
"Yes, of course." I had spent all of cross country season trailing her to make sure she didn't tumble and hurt herself.
She looked down to her hand before beginning to speak.
"My father and I had gone out to dinner one night before I was leaving to spend time with my mom, the summer before starting high school. Forks, where I'm from, is rainy, all of the time. If you're native to there you know how to deal with it, it's like how people around here know how to drive in the snow, that kind of thing. We had finished our meal and were walking back to his cruiser, he was the Chief of Police of Forks. It was raining out, the parking lot was newly blacktopped and mixed with the rain it was kinda slick. This woman, she was 80 something years old, she was taking the turn coming around the corner and got mixed up between the gas and the brake, she accelerated when she should have braked. At least, that's what they told me. The whole thing happened in probably a matter of seconds. I guess my dad had tried to push me out of the way, which resulted in my injuries, he took the hardest of the impact, her car, according to the police report, had fishtailed hitting him then swinging back and hit me."
She stopped talking, her voice had been devoid of any emotion, she spoke it like it was rote.
I took a deep breath, I was shaking inside slightly, thinking of the horror that day must have been, of the horrors all of the following days must have been.
She got up after a moment and walked over to the mantle taking down a black and white photograph mounted in a black picture frame, she came back and handed it to me.
It was an image of Bella with her father along a river bank. They were each holding up a fish, both outfitted in waders and vests. Bella was obviously younger, maybe 13 or 14, she hadn't grown into her face yet, her eyes looked wide and innocent, her smile showing her teeth that seemed a little to large for her face, freckles evident across her just emerging cheekbones. Her father held the fish in front of him but his smile beamed with pride at his daughter, sharing this activity together, the gentle river in the background surrounded by the cocoon of the forest. It was a picture any parent would cherish. I held the picture like it was a treasure.
"I set up the timer on my camera, it was the last time we went fishing together. He was so excited, he showed me how to tie a fly, we had been practicing all summer on my casting. He had taken the fish to be mounted together to commemorate the day," at saying this she let out a gasping breath and silent tears started to fall down her cheeks.
"Christ, I'm sorry," she took the heel of her hand to wipe away the tears.
I quickly set the picture down got up and encircled her in my arms. I felt her taking deep breaths trying to calm herself down.
"You're alright, I've got you," I said quietly through her hair to her ear. I felt her wrap her arms around my waist and lean into me.
"Come on, let's go upstairs," I took her hand in mine and we walked up to her room.
We got ready for bed together, silently, it wasn't awkward or angry, melancholy, yes, I imagine she was thinking of her father and I was thinking of her father as well as my own parents.
I am involved in mankind, and therefore never send to know for whom the bells tolls; it tolls for the.
We climbed into bed, and she curled up against me bringing my arm around her and twining her legs with mine, after turning off the lights she gave the palm of my hand a kiss.
I leaned over, kissed the top of her head bringing my arms tighter around her.
It was as bad as I imagined it would be, I thought to myself.
A/N John Donne, Meditation XVII, or For Whom the Bell Tolls, as it's more commonly known by.
Well, the tale of Bella is starting to unfold, let me know what you think.
As always, Pinkindeed is awesome, her continued kindness is a rare thing. And the next chapter of, Beautiful Girl 'Cailin Alainn', should be up soon.
And I'm totally pimping myself here, after I finished last chapter of BLS, I started another story, it's called, Still Waters Run Deep. It's a Bella / Edward story, although it doesn't start off that way, don't let that put you off, take a hop over to my profile to link to it.
I also put a link for Dia de los Muertos and how it's celebrated in Chicago, as well as a link for the National Museum of Mexican Art, located in Pilsen.