Liar

Chapter 10: Storm

AN: Managed to make this chapter a few hundred words longer than the last! And maybe it's not too cliff-hanger-ish this time! Enjoy!

The door was already open, so Robin stood in the doorway, staring at him. He was laying on his bed, on his back and staring up.

"I thought I knew what I wanted..." Garfield said quietly, "I thought, for so long...that I could have prevented their... I thought... Robin, if nobody deserves to die, then what about prison? Shouldn't I be locked up?"

Robin stepped closer, "It's in the past. And we lock up people who cause trouble, in hopes that they either learn what they're doing is wrong, or just to put them away for a while. You aren't causing trouble, or at least, not in that way."

Garfield didn't seem to like that, glaring towards Robin, "So what? I'm off the hook?"

"I'm sure whatever stuff you stole probably wasn't too important. I don't even fully understand the situation, and we have no proof."

"You're making excuses for me?"

Robin smiled at him as he sat on the side of his bed, "The line between good and bad sometimes blurs. Whether that be because someone's crossed the line or because someone they like is on the other side."

Garfield suddenly pulled a pillow over his face, "Why...? You guys don't like me. You just feel guilty. If I had acted all silly and annoying, I could have left and nobody would have cared, then I could have jumped, and you'd all feel guilty, sure, but you'd get over-"

Not letting him finish, Robin quickly grabbed Garfield by his shoulders, knocking the pillow from his hands, "Idiot! How can you not see how much we care?! If I really hated how annoying you were, then why are you still on this team?! I would have kicked you off if I didn't care! But if you're so distant from us that you don't care how we feel, then maybe you shouldn't be on this team after all!"

"I care how you guys feel! I was going to kill myself for-"

For all of you.

Robin could handle it, couldn't listen to anymore of it, and he quickly covered Garfield's mouth. Why did he have to speak those words so easily?

"Then you don't really know us, Garfield. That, or your own wants and needs are blinding you."

Robin didn't take his hand away. He didn't want to hear his reply, but suddenly Garfield moved, shoving Robin back a little, "So what do you want, then?"

Robin stared at him, sitting up more, "For you to not assume what we want. And...I want you to be happy. But I don't want you to fake it. I want you to let us help you, or to at least understand...you're not a burden."

Garfield looked away, his eyes cloudy. He looked numb. "You're very demanding," he muttered, "But...I want to try. Even if it means I'll be in everyone's way, bothering everyone. I'm like that anyways, no matter what I do."

"You're not. Sometimes the way you act gets annoying, but so does everyone else. You know that. You know you shouldn't be treated any differently. Didn't you say something like that when you were yelling this evening? That you shouldn't be treated differently just because you and Raven have been fighting? Which, isn't our problem, by the way. The fact that you yelled so much more recently is because something's bothering you. That's our problem."

Suddenly Garfield groaned, looking slightly annoyed, "No...I've been yelling more because I'm getting tired of always being cheerful. Why should I? Raven doesn't. But...then, I'm supposed to be the silly one, that's my role..."

"Hey, you've always acted that way. It's not like anyone ever told you to. Actually, it was the opposite."

"Yeah," Garfield looked towards the open door for a moment, "But I thought that if I showed how upset I was, then it would only bother everyone. I thought people would like me more if I'm happy. I still think that. I mean, look, you're bothered now, aren't you?"

Robin shook his head, struggling with how to say what he meant, "Yes, it bothers me that you're...the way you are, but that's because we all care about you, of course it bothers us. That's why we want to help you."

Garfield didn't say anything to that, and they stay silent. The rain was getting heavier outside, and suddenly a flash of lightning shines in through the current, followed by thunder. Robin looks down at Garfield, who was now laying on his side.

"What if...I've never actually been happy before? What if I've been acting this whole time, and none of you know me at all?"

"Well," Robin paused, "Have you been acting this whole time?"

"I don't know...I'm not sure anymore."

Robin stared at him, not knowing what to say. He turns to see Star standing in the doorway, "Pizza is here!"

Robin opened his mouth to speak, but Garfield spoke first, "Maybe later."

"Oh, um...but, it will get cold, why not join us now? You both must be very hungry-"

I'm worried about you.

Robin looked up, Garfield suddenly walking past him, to the door, "I said no, so go away!"

Before Star could say anymore, Garfield shut the door. He walked back over and sat down, going quiet again.

"You know," Robin started, carefully, "You keep saying you'll let us help you. When are going to stop lying? Even before we found out something was wrong with you, you've been lying. Acting like you're fine...when are you going to let us actually help?"

Garfield remained silent, not moving, not speaking.

"Garfield?"

"Don't...do that... Don't use my name. It's Beast Boy."

Robin frowned, "Until you start to improve, until you start feeling better, I'm going to keep calling you by your name. Your real name. At this point, it seems like Beast Boy is your mask. So until you can actually smile like you used to, then no, I won't call you that. Do you understand?"

"That doesn't seem fair."

"What? Not allowing you to lie? I'm concerned for you. You mentioned how if you acted annoying, we would have let you...jump. And, well, I don't want you to pretend that you're better, just for us to lose you... You doing that isn't fair."

"I meant...Robin is your mask," Garfield suddenly glanced at him, meeting his eyes, "Plus, you literally have a mask."

"I...didn't mean it like that. I'm not trying to act different and separate myself from my past, unlike you. It's one thing to not want to talk about it, but you seem to want to be an entirely different person."

Garfield chewed his lower lip, seeming confused, "I was. I'm trying to not do that. I'm tired of acting, but I still feel like none of you will like me anymore..."

"You're not different, this is just a another side of you. I can't and won't believe that you've never been happy while you were here."

There was silence for a few seconds, then Garfield looked back to him again, "Anyways, why don't you tell me your actual name? It's not fair that you know mine."

Robin rolled his eyes, "Really? It doesn't matter that much. I'm not the one with the problem. I'm not-"

"How am I supposed to tell you everything without feeling like a burden unless it feels normal? Normal people share their secrets, right? So, in return for me telling you so much about myself and my past, and if only to make me feel better...please? It'll be weird if I keep telling you stuff, rambling about myself. I already feel weird with the spot light on me so much. I've had to literally hide in this past week just to avoid all of you."

"Oh, and why do you think the spot light's been on you? Maybe it's because we care?"

Garfield crossed his arms, looking down, "If you're trying to prove you care, that doesn't help. Anyone and everyone could be concerned, if you act the right way. I'm not looking for 'concern', that's the last thing I'm looking for. I'm looking for...help. I'm looking for friends I can tell things to, I guess...even though, I was actually looking for freedom from my past..."

"Okay, but you knew you could talk to us, didn't you?"

"Yeah...but I didn't want to concern anyone. I don't want to bother anyone, or upset anyone, or make anyone anxious... I just...wanted to talk...but I started feeling like I couldn't. It started setting in that you guys might not know me that well...since I always hid whenever I felt depressed..."

Robin sighed, "Why didn't you tell us sooner? We would have understood..."

"No, you all did exactly what I thought you would. I guess you did what was normal. You...acted like being depressed was strange...you acted like I was broken... Of course I get depressed, my past..." he stopped, burying his face against his knees, then he cursed quietly, something Robin was sadly getting used to hearing.

"I'm sorry... I shouldn't have, but you were normally so... Look, I'm sorry, I had assumed that you couldn't be that upset...sorry."

Garfield stayed where he was, though. Robin glanced down, knowing that somehow everything would probably be fine. But it didn't feel like it yet. It felt like chaos. It felt like he had made the biggest mistake any friend-no, any person could make. It felt like he belonged in prison. Why couldn't he have just been more understanding? He groaned, rubbing his forehead. Idiot.

"Let's talk about something else," Garfield suddenly muttered.

"We going to have to talk about everything eventually-"

"I know, I just...can't. Right now."

Robin nodded, ready to get to another conversation, preferably a less painful, depressing one. But he couldn't think of anything. Or rather, he could, but he didn't want to...

"My name is Dick Grayson."

Garfield looked over at him, shocked, but he didn't say anything, he just stared. Robin sighed, reaching up, he took his mask off, "Are you happy now?"

Garfield swallowed uncomfortably, still staring at him, "Uh...you didn't have to...I mean-it's just that, now it feels like I'm being a bad friend..."

"You're not. I wanted to let you know."

With a nod, Garfield abruptly looked away, "Thanks...for everything."

Robin winced, "Careful, that sounds like a goodbye."

Suddenly Garfield was hugging him. Robin relaxed, hugging him back. He wasn't sure why, but it made him happy, like Beast Boy was officially taking off his mask. And even if he wasn't, Robin realized something, in that moment.

After this, I can't let him be by himself, not until he starts feeling better.

I know there's a way to help him.

I know he will feel better.