Chapter 10
Carol thought she could stay there, holding her daughter against her chest, forever. The sight of her own dead body bothered her a little but she couldn't remember why it should. She didn't think it was a sight that Sophia should have to see either, no matter that the girl had died herself, long ago. She leaned back and smoothed the hair back from Sophia's face and smiled.
"You haven't changed at all."
"No, but you have, Mama." Carol frowned, for the first time thinking about the ways she had changed since she had seen her daughter last. She looked slightly older, she was sure. Her hair was longer. She was leaner and more muscular than she had been. Grief and stress had given her a few more lines in her face. But those were just the physical changes.
Emotionally and mentally, the changes were far more drastic. Gone was the weak, cowering woman and in her place was a self-sufficient, strong, and infinitely more confident woman. She felt as though the woman she had been when Sophia was alive, was dead and gone. As she had told Daryl, burned away. Again, she felt a longing and intense despair at not being allowed to see him again but, she thought, looking at Sophia, at least she had her daughter back.
Pushing Daryl from her mind, Carol thought back to everything that had happened since Sophia had died. She thought about everything she had done, all of her mistakes, and she worried about what Sophia would think. Would she be disgusted? Would she hate her?
"Sophia…" Carol began but trailed off, not knowing what to say.
"It's okay, Mommy." Sophia spoke as though she understood what Carol was thinking and maybe she did.
"Okay, baby girl. Hey, let's get out of this room, huh? Why don't you take me to…" All of a sudden Carol had no idea how to finish. Where had Sophia been all this time? Had she been alone?
A look of sadness passed over Sophia's face. "I'm sorry, Mama. But you can't come with me."