Hello everybody!
Yes I've been bad and haven't updated this story in a good little bit of time. But I hope you found the time to read my new DearS story that I started. And before you yell 'don't start new stories finish this one!' know that I can't just write one story. Part of how it takes so long between updates is I have a lot of ideas. Either way, hope you enjoy this latest offering
FYI updated version with improved grammar…I think
'Thoughts'
"Spoken"
X-X
A Past to Forget
Chapter 10
It wasn't the gentle light of the sun, the chime of her alarm clock, or even the call of nature that woke Misato. It was a grinding and splitting pain in her forehead. The side affects of drinking a sum of alcohol far surpassing her usual amount that caused it. Clutching at the sides of her head, futilely trying to dull the pain that was akin to an ice pick in her brain, Misato sat up in her futon. Still dress in the previous days work attire, knee length black slacks and red collared shirt, she saw her door hadn't been closed and that opening was what allowed the small amount of sunlight to splash into her room. 'Odd, usually Shinji-kun shuts the door when I leave it open at night,' Misato mused as she reached for the bottle of aspirin she kept for special occasions.
Not feeling like changing into casual cloths just yet, Misato got to her feat and headed to the kitchen on groggy and shaky legs. Being human, and that meant being a creature of habit; Misato had several expectations as she walked towards her destination. Sure it was Sunday and that meant not only did she have the day off but also so did Shinji and Asuka, otherwise the German wouldn't have slept at her friends home, but Misato knew Shinji would be up already. 'Cooking me a good breakfast, so eager to please,' she didn't know if she should be happy or sad at that. Doubts and worries as to why he felt so inclined to work around the house were always on her mind as of late. 'Do you think I expect it of you? That I'll be mad if you don't cook and clean?'
Would she have been mad at him, she didn't think she would be. Pulling her fingers through her frazzled and knotted hair, Misato let out a loud yawn and scratched her stomach. A small grin formed on her face, 'I'll give him a little scare this morning,' Misato thought jokingly as she hunched over and jumped into the kitchen right behind the stove and shouted, "YAH!" The sound of her attempt to startle the cooking Ikari echoed in the empty kitchen. 'He's not in here? But he's always up by this time and usually about ready to put food on our plates.'
Something didn't sit right with this situation in Misato's mind. Checking the digital clock on the microwave to insure she hadn't woken to early or to late, Misato's stomach began to clench. "Shinji-kun?" she called out loudly in the kitchen, sure that he'd hear her and respond quickly. Greeted by only more silence, the bottom of her stomach dropped. 'I didn't do something to him in my sleep did I?' As much as it frightened her to think it was possible, a tiny part of her mind chided her about just how good he was. 'STOP THAT! I don't want to…he's to young and suffered to much!' She yelled at herself, trying to stop any part of her from seeing Shinji as anything but a pilot and friend.
The silence was deafening, why wasn't he answering her. "Shinji-kun, you stop playing now, if you're here you say something." Her voice was a mixture of fear and anger. Looking around the kitchen frantically, Misato felt her heart start to lurch in her chest. 'Was he home at all yesterday…I didn't check.' Running through the apartment and accidentally kicking Pen-Pen while the penguin made his way to his empty food dish, Misato stumbled and braced herself against the wall with her hand. Her free hand timidly reached for Shinji's door. "Shinji-kun?" she again asked as she drew the door open and stepped inside. Empty, it was empty and by the look of the bed it hadn't been slept in.
Walking further into Shinji's room and checking for more evidence that it had been empty for an extended period, Misato checked his hanging clothing, she found his backpack in the same place he usually threw it, everything looked like it'd been sitting for at least a day. 'He didn't come home yesterday after school…' A multitude of scenarios started to play through her mind. The spectrum was running more towards horrific and less toward peaceful. Yes he could have went to a friends house like Asuka had, but Misato doubted Shinji would do that. 'With how he his, I don't think he'd ever impose on somebody else's home.' No Misato's real thoughts were, 'what if that bitch found him again? What if right now she's doing things to him?'
For a moment all Misato could do was stare blankly at the mostly empty room, her partially realized it appeared he might leave at a moments notice. A tiny fury started to brew in Misato's mind. She wasn't going to panic, had to stay focused or who knew what might happen. Smacking her face hard to break her own self induced paralysis, Misato ran from the boy's room to the phone in the living room. She had to call Nerv and get section-2 off their ass and to inform Ritsuko. Hitting the speed dial, Misato tapped her foot impatiently listening to the phone ring, pick up, and the scrambler kick in to insure a secure line.
A tired and haggard voice spoke, "Whatever it is Misato can't it wait. It's been a long night and I want to go home." Ritsuko's entire body ached from the long night of supervising the night crew. And the call from Gendo's office around three a.m. for what was only a smidgen away from debauchery. How Ritsuko started to have feelings for the man she didn't know, but she couldn't refuse him. Love wasn't what Gendo wanted from her, he wanted an outlet for his sexual impulses, and his more violent ones as well. He'd hit her hard during this last session and Ritsuko really wanted to go home and sleep it off. 'But no, I bet Misato's going to ask me to come over and help her with reports again.'
"Shinji's missing, his bed hasn't been slept in," the upset woman hadn't bothered with a hello or a question about why her friend was upset. The phone clutched tightly against her ear, Misato walked slowly, almost gracefully to her room. She listened as Ritsuko gasped over the line; she knew her friend understood the ramifications. Opening her underwear drawer, Misato reached deeply into the cotton, silk, and lacy confines to find something hard and cold. Pulling her sidearm from its hiding place, Misato was bound and determined to find Shinji. If anybody had done something to him she'd distribute justice as served. Misato drew back the chamber of her weapon and slid a clip into it then set it into the holster strapped it to her side. "I'll make the bitch pay."
"What did you say Misato?" Ritsuko asked having heard a mumble over the line. Fatigue and pain caused her to quickly lose focus. She didn't need more troubles right now, but what could she do. Shinji was essential to the survival of the human race, and if he was missing who knew what to expect. 'Damn why can't Maya be here to help with this, never around when I need her anymore,' Ritsuko thought. Had her sleep deprived brain been not so troubled she'd have realized that Maya was the last person to actually see Shinji. "I'll get section two to start looking for him, you on your way in?"
The hangover forgotten, Misato was surprised at how calm she felt. "Yeah, I'll be right in. And I want that bitch Kamazaki brought in too." Misato was sure that if Ritsuko didn't know before she did that Mizuho was released that Kaji would have told her. 'I'm sure that bitch has something to do with this, she sure as hell is the cause of it.'
Rubbing her throbbing temple with her free hand, Ritsuko didn't understand what Misato was driving at. Bring in Mizuho Kamazaki, why? But she didn't want to question Misato on it either. Questions only would add to her pain, the length of her shift, and upset Misato further. "I'll have a detachment keep an eye out for her. See you when you…" she didn't get the chance to finish as the line was dead. Setting the phone back on the receiver, Ritsuko sighed heavily. 'When will this day end?' Her bruised bicep thundered as she pulled it back to her body, the bite mark was sure to leave a scar, but she could lie to herself that it wasn't intentional, deceiving herself was quickly becoming easier.
X-X
Just as Misato was pulling out of her parking space and racing down the streets of Tokyo-3 another household was having a more peaceful morning. Sliding the eggs and bacon onto the plate Hikari grumbled under her breath. 'Why can't Asuka eat traditional Japanese food for breakfast?' Whenever Asuka stayed over and forced Hikari to cook, it was never something cheap. 'Bacon is so expensive and dad will be so mad if he finds it missing!' But it was easier to accept an upset father than a ranting Asuka, Hikari believed. Setting the sizzling plates of food on the table, Hikari called out. "Asuka, Nozomi foods ready!" At least her older sister wasn't there that morning. The eldest Hokari girl had a touch part time job.
Wobbling into the dining room with her hair mussed, Asuka mumbled something that sounded like a thank you before taking her customary seat at the Hokari table. How Hikari managed to be so chipper in the morning, Asuka couldn't fathom. Especially after staying up late with her playing video games. Nozomi playfully slapped Asuka on the back before taking her own seat across the table. "So what did you make us today sis?" Nozomi chirped happily, unlike her sister, she liked the taste of more western foods. Straightening out her unruly light blue pajamas, they were riding high, Nozomi sniffed the air above the plate like a dog. "Oh Bacon! Did you use that package of dad's?"
"Sssh! He might hear you!" Hikari whispered harshly. That and Asuka might have heard that the food stock had been somewhat pilfered to appease the German's distinguished sense of taste. Sliding into her chair and sipping her orange juice, Hikari looked over at the haggard Asuka. 'Guess Asuka still isn't much of a morning person, wonder how Shinji-kun handles her?' that thought made her smile a trifle. She could almost picture the bashful young man running around the apartment with a pink apron and a smile, how little she knew of the real living environment of the boy. "How is it Asuka, not to crispy is it?" Hikari knew Asuka's standards were high, and even friends weren't exempt from meeting them.
Unhurriedly eating the meal provided for her at potential personal risk for her friend, Asuka wasn't overly impressed by it. It was good yes, but she had to admit she usually ate better. "Its not bad, but Shinji's is actually better, only thing he does right" it was odd but Asuka couldn't deny it, even though she wanted to desperately. Drinking the coffee she had insisted Hikari make for her, Asuka's eyes finally opened fully instead of the half closed manner they had been earlier. Seeing a shocked look on Hikari's face and an angry look on Nozomi's, Asuka set her cup down. "What?"
Placing her chopsticks on the table, Hikari's look of surprise slowly faded to a small smile. "Well its just the first time you ever said anything nice about Shinji-kun," Hikari explained. Several more moments passed and silence prevailed in the room. Nozomi's anger remained on her face as the trio started to eat again.
The silence remained until Nozomi couldn't stand Hikari's lack of responding anymore. "Hikari how can you just sit there while she talks that way about your boyfriend!" the younger child yelled as she pointed an accusing finger at Asuka. The German's reaction was to swallow her unchewed food quickly and start coughing, while Hikari's face paled. "Its bad enough she gets to live with him, but she's always bad mouthing him, stand up for him!" Nozomi said again through the commotion at the table. It was the young girl's view that the movie fiasco had actually been staged it went to smoothly to be unplanned. And even if they weren't going out, Nozomi could hope her sister would wise up and move past that idiot Touji in favor of the other boy.
Asuka's reaction to the false information was of a great surprise to the second Hokari child, she was mad. Hikari had seen Asuka angry before, but the look of hatred that blossomed on her friend's face in a mere instant was unheard of. Slamming her own utensils on the table, Asuka stood up with enough force to knock her chair over. "What the hell was that Hikari? You're dating that perverted bastard!" It wasn't possible no it couldn't be true. How could he, the boy she allowed to kiss her, be interested in somebody else?
Putting her hands up in defense, Hikari felt afraid of her Asuka at that moment. "Nozomi where do you get off saying things like that! Asuka you know I don't like Shinji-kun that way," she tried to keep her voice soft and peaceful, lull the dragon back to sleep. Asuka's eyes narrowed accusingly, not readily believing yet wanting to. Quickly looking over at Nozomi who now showed fear as well, "Apologize to Asuka, Nozomi." What for Hikari didn't know, but something had to be said.
The gaze of Hikari's friend falling on her for the comment, Hikari's demand she apologize, or just plain childish stubbornness caused the child to speak again. "But you are, you even saw a movie with him. Don't let her bitch at him anymore!" The words while directed at Hikari were yelled in Asuka's face.
Her superiority was challenged. Asuka was just starting to learn to appreciate and enjoy her new toy, Shinji's affection, and wasn't going to lose it. 'He likes me not her, he kisses me because he likes me, he touches me because I ask him and he likes me, it's all because he likes ME and not HER!' He had to like her it was just how it was supposed to be. He'd do what she told him because he liked her and that gave her power over him, a power she wasn't considering losing. Turning back to Hikari, "So is this true? You're actually seeing that pervert and lied to me about it?"
Suddenly feeling very cold, Hikari couldn't believe how quickly the day went from peaceful to this. Glaring daggers at her younger sister for causing even more trouble Hikari tried her best to recall the event in question. When she could remember what truly happened she offered the event in detail for Asuka's inspection. "I was taking Nozomi to see a movie and he was there, that's all. Nozomi wanted to see the same scary movie he did, you know I hate scary movies Asuka. That's all. I don't like Shinji-kun, not at all. I want to date Touji!" She was near tears at this point. Hikari hated confrontation, and the hateful glare in Asuka's eyes had her scared so much. 'What does she have against Shinji-kun that makes her so mad!'
Asuka believed Hikari's story, not because she trusted the girl, but because she wanted the security in knowing he was hers. And she could still do with him what she wanted. 'I don't want to loose that power…if he was seeing Hikari that would mean he was toying with ME…and that can't happen.' A grim realization occurred to her, she'd have to tell they young Ikari about this. He wasn't allowed see other girls like that anymore; they might use his own perverse nature as a tool of getting him. 'He's not that good a guy, but those whores don't care about that, they'd fuck him just for the social status boost.' Sitting back down at the table, Nozomi had run off during Hikari's loud debasement of Shinji, Asuka smiled weakly. "I'm sorry about that, I trust you Hikari. Its just I don't want to see you hurt by him."
Both girls knew it was a lie, a very weak lie, but neither mentioned it again. Hikari would learn to not talk about the shy boy she wished could have been her friend, but she wouldn't go against Asuka to do it. She'd have to let her hopes of friendship die or Asuka would likely hate her for the rest of her life. It was a painful but easy decision to make. Asuka, through her fake smile, had started thinking about others that might try and take what was hers away. Why was Shinji hers, because he liked her maybe even loved her. His feelings gave her the power over him that she yearned for, and wouldn't do without. She'd have to be more careful with him. Nozomi had provided her a real eye opener. 'Maybe I'll give him a little something extra next time, it'll keep him in line,' how far she was willing to go wasn't known, but her thighs started to rub against each other softly and with greater eagerness at the thought.
X-X
Three hours of Section-2's incompetence and still no sign of Shinji, Misato and a very tired Ritsuko realized something vital that they had overlooked in their flurry of actions. Maya had been the last to see him, Maya hadn't shown up for work that day, and Maya wasn't answering her phone. Not stopping to listen to anything Ritsuko had to say in Maya's defense, Misato went straight to her car and was now standing outside of a fairly expensive looking apartment complex. 'A single bedroom wouldn't cost that much here I bet, that bitch! Just what the hell is she thinking!' Misato's mind was a red haze of anger.
She had been worried about Shinji the whole day, and it might have all been Maya's fault. 'What did she do it for? Just to piss me off I bet, to show she can mess with me?' Several of the other residents peeked out of their doors, as Misato not so much as knocked on Maya's door but pounded on it. "Open up in there damn it!" A few seconds of silence later, Misato started pounding on the door again. Finally she heard shuffling feet and the lock on the door unlatch. At that slight hitch sound, Misato depressed the handle and flung the door open. Finding a wide-eyed Maya pressed against the wall, fear etched in her eyes, Misato stepped over the threshold. "Just what the FUCK have you been doing?"
Panicked, Maya pressed herself harder against the wall, "Katsuragi-san what are you talking about, why are you here?" Taking a moment to look down the hall at her bedroom where she hoped her guest was still sleeping, Maya tried to will herself to move but her legs were ridged and uncooperative.
Misato's legs weren't however, and soon the young tech was pressed firmly against the wall, Misato's forearm under her chin and against her neck. "You have two minutes to tell me where Shinji is and what you did to him." Leaning forward and applying a more pressure against the fragile neck of Maya, Misato gave the young woman a show of who was in charge.
'What the hell is she thinking?' Maya tried desperately to think but the adrenaline was pumping and fight or flight took over. Turning quickly and pushing off of the wall, Maya shoved her shoulder against Misato's chest, sending the Captain staggering back a few steps and struggling to maintain balance. "Katsuragi, Shinji-kun is sleeping right now so if you'd keep your voice down please!" Maya's tone was a harsh whisper, and had she been thinking about what she had just said would have expected Misato's next move.
Upon hearing where Maya had kept Shinji, Misato's mind, fueled by her fears and worries, supplied in the rest. "You slut!" Misato yelled before slamming the back of her hand across Maya's face. "Is this your idea of helping him? Dragging him away from everybody under a false pretense so you can see just how good a fuck he is?" Sweat started pouring down Misato's face as the anger, fear, and aggression started to finally come out. Misato pulled her hand back for another strike while Maya slumped to the ground, her face ashen white.
Tears streaming out of her eyes, Maya could only gape at the towering form of Misato. "Is that what you think I did?" it sounded so impossible to the young woman that anybody would suspect it of her. Maya had Shinji's best interests in heart. "Maybe that's what YOU'RE planning but not me," Maya said between sobs. Fear, humiliation, and pain were her rewards for trying to help Shinji to stand up for himself.
Pulling the cowering woman back to her feat, Misato held Maya by her collar, examining the woman's face for any sign of falsehood. "Then what were you doing with him that kept him and yourself so secreted away?" Her tone was flat, not emotionless but flat, a machine voice. Pressing the woman again against the wall, this time to keep Maya from falling back down.
Sniffing and wanting to clean the running snot from her nose away but was afraid Misato would interpret it as a sign of aggression, Maya shivered uncontrollably. "A…a traffic accident kept us from getting to the restaurant before his lunch period ended…so I thought why not let him have some time away from school." It was the honest truth but Misato wasn't in a very believing mood. Pulling Maya away from the wall and then shoving her back again, the tech's head bounced roughly off the wall. Maya's vision began to swim and warble from the blow.
"So that's it huh, this is all just so he didn't have to go to school? That was one long lunch wasn't it?" Misato's breath reeked of beer and the last meal she'd eaten. In her mind she knew she was being unfair, unduly harsh on Maya but she had be so afraid that she couldn't help it. "What else, and don't you think for a moment I won't ask him to confirm this."
Nodding dumbly to Misato, Maya saw the fury in the woman's eyes; she'd not lie in any form to her. "After the meal he asked to go back to school…I said that since he was so late why not skip. I took him to a movie, thanked him for all his hard work." Maya had been so proud of herself, and of Shinji for the events there. He had opened up to her somewhat. They talked about how things were in his life, how he was handling things, and to Maya's surprise he started asking her questions about her past and her current life. She was shocked at how much in common they had, how much she liked talking and being around him.
"Then what," it wasn't a question it was an order for Maya to continue. Misato was building evidence in her case against the woman. Maya had affronted Misato, and the Captain didn't see Maya's actions as a duty of good will for Shinji, no this was blowback for Misato's pressing the belief that Asuka had been a good influence on him while Maya had not agreed. "After the movie he fall asleep in your car and you just said 'hey why not let him stay at my place and not tell anybody?'"
"NO!" Maya yelled, no longer able to keep her fear at bay. She feared what Misato might do to her in her excited state. The slap still stung but what else would Misato do if she decided Maya had done something unforgivable? What if Misato didn't believe her? "I wanted him to stand up to you! He idolizes you so much! Nothing you do is ever wrong, I didn't want him to trade one sex crazed woman for another!" The slap echoed in the apartment's small hallway. Maya's head bounded to the side but didn't feel the pain her body was to full of fear to notice.
Misato's hand ached from the pain of the blow. "So I'm a sex crazed bitch huh? What makes you so much better? What gives you the right to say what's good for him and what's not? I don't see a psychology degree with your name on it Ibuki-kun." Maya had no right to tell Misato she was doing what was right for Shinji. They were all in the same boat, and it had no captain, it was only sailing in the dark on good intentions. Misato knew she wasn't the best person in the world, and she knew Shinji looked up to her in some fashion, but that wasn't a bad thing was it?
Slumping against Misato, Maya's tears came out harder. "He cried you know…you didn't have to hear what he said after he got here. I wanted to help him…to make him happy but he said…he said. He didn't want to upset you. He started crying because he was afraid you'd be mad at him and force him out! He cried so hard that he passed out! What did you do to get such respect from him! You, from all Akagi and Ryoji-san say were nothing but a drunken whore in college and no better now!" Falling to her knees Maya didn't care if Misato struck her again, it didn't matter. Misato wasn't fit to care for herself let along a child recovering from such abuse, yet nobody would listen to Maya about it because she was 'just the dumb bitch that wanted to tag along.'
Misato's gaze never left Maya's crumpled body, but a sound to her left caught her attention, it was the sound of a door closing. "I…I'm…I'm so sorry Maya-san, Misato-san!" Shinji said softly as he rushed passed them and out into the hallway. Misato turned to run after him but Maya arms latched onto her leg preventing movement.
"Bitch let go of me! He heard all of this, he was running now because of it!" Misato hollered while she tried to pull her leg out of Maya's grasp but the young woman hung on for dear life. To Maya ever moment Shinji was away from Misato as a moment he had to heal. Maya didn't think it would take long before Misato had Shinji doing all the things Mizuho had him do. 'Katsuragi is no better than that woman, she doesn't see him as a person but rather a tool!' By the time Misato pulled her leg free and reached the street, Shinji was no were to be seen.
X-X
His entire body felt numb. Shinji couldn't believe his incompetence. 'I've upset Misato-san, and got Maya-san in trouble. Why did I let that happen!' He wanted to cry but had no tears left. Walking in a daze down streets he didn't see, passing people that he didn't acknowledge, Shinji started to hear a familiar droning sound. It was the sound of construction. Coming to a stop he looked around for familiar landmarks, and found one very familiar one. "I'm at Ayanami's," he said softly as he viewed the dilapidated building. Somehow in his confusion and sadness Shinji unintentionally sought out comfort, and was now outside Rei's home.
He considered turning around right then and going back to Misato's, but stopped when he wondered if Misato would have him back. He entered the apartment and started walking up the rickety stairs, the dirt and dust on handrail sticking to his hand and cloths. 'Why am I here?' Shinji thought, again wanting to turn and leave but walked forward regardless. As he knocked on the door, he noticed the mail was still stacking up outside the albino's door. More silence meet him after he knocked, about to turn and leave believing Rei either gone or ignoring him, the door jerked with a loud creak and out from the crack in the door were a pair of red eyes. "Ikari-kun?"
"Um…hi Ayanami-san, I'm not bothering you am I?" Shinji's voice was just as he felt inside, unsure and tentative. He couldn't believe he had the courage to knock on the door let alone talk to her. Rei seemed to contemplate something serious for a few moments, moments Shinji expected her to fill with words along the lines of 'leave,' or 'I'm busy.' However Rei's response was to step further into her apartment and open the door fully.
As Shinji bowed to her slightly and walked into her apartment, Rei considered Commander Ikari's words to her. 'I should have sent him away, but I could not. I feel warm with the knowledge he came to me.' Watching as Shinji took his shoes off, she led him into her apartment. She heard him let out a hiss as he came into view of her living quarters. "Is something the matter Ikari-kun?"
He couldn't complain about Rei's lack in cleanliness, so Shinji just waved it off. "No, I just hope I'm not interrupting anything is all." He also couldn't tell her about the events with Maya or Misato, it wouldn't be acceptable in the slightest. Standing dumbly in what he remembered was Rei's bedroom Shinji watched how casually Rei sat on the dirty mattress. "How…how are you feeling today by the way?" A small blush fell onto his cheeks.
Tilting her head slightly as she pondered not only his words but also his reaction, Rei replied. "You have not interrupted anything, and as I have no chairs in this room, if you wish to sit you may sit here." Rei patted the spot on her bed next to her. A small plume of dust bellowed outward from the impact. For a reason Rei couldn't comprehend her face felt warmer and her stomach hitched at her simple statement. 'Why would my offering him to sit next to me cause this feeling, it is most pleasant.'
Hesitating for a moment, Shinji chastised himself for even being there and defiling Rei's purity with his taint. However in the end he nervously sat next to the impassive girl, his need for want and affection overrode his natural inclination to run. His breath came out quick and shallow, oh how nervous he felt just sitting next to her after what she had said before. "Are you sure you don't mind?" Whether he was asking about the close contact or him even being there, Shinji himself didn't know.
Her eyes never left Shinji, something about his actions seemed almost funny to her. She didn't know it, but Rei was feeling giddy at that moment. Her appreciation of Shinji had escalated to genuine feelings of liking the boy. He was polite to her, something nobody save the Commander was. He said words of praise about her, something not even the Commander did. Just sitting next to him, Rei could feel her heart rate increasing and she liked that feeling. "I am positive Ikari-kun."
And there they sat for several moments in silence. Shinji soaking up Rei's cool detachment from the world and calming his nerves and fear. Yes he would likely be punished my Misato, but he could hope she forgave him and didn't turn him out. Rei simply reveled in the new feelings and emotions being around Shinji caused. So much she didn't understand, so much she craved to know about. Her drive for understanding and knowledge broke the peaceful silence. "Ikari-kun, does your presence here indicate we are friends?" she had never had true friends before so she didn't know what friends did.
Turning his head quickly to meet Rei's eyes, Shinji couldn't believe what he was hearing. Had it been anybody else, Shinji would have thought the words a joke. But Rei, Shinji had to admit, wasn't always so keen on topics like friendship or love. In a broken yet happy voice, "I'd like to think so Ayanami-san, I really would." Friends with somebody so much better than him, friends with a girl he'd gladly give his life for to protect, for that friendship Shinji nearly burst.
A low blush spread across Rei's face again. "I would enjoy that I believe." Rei slowly started under no direct control of herself, to lean towards Shinji. "I believe that I enjoy your presence in my life Ikari-kun." Her words filled with a subtle warmth. Looking at each other for several more quite minutes the pair could neither more or speak. Rei was amazed at how hard it was to admit such things; she'd never had problems with her actions before, yet with Shinji it was so hard. Shinji was just in shock; this day was nothing but a great shock after another great shock. Though this shock was positive in response to the great negative one of earlier.
'I think…I think I like her,' Shinji hated himself to admit, to finally accept. It would never work out that way for him, it shouldn't. He wasn't worthy of her yet here they sat, eye to eye on her bed. Looking at her soft ruby red lips, such a stark contrast to her skin, he felt so inclined to lean in, steal a kiss from them. 'But that would sully her, she doesn't like me, she doesn't know any better.' But oh how inviting they were, and her eyes almost appeared to be calculating if she could do the same to him.
And she was, Rei knew little of male-female relations, and from what she gathered physicality was a large part of it. Thinking about Shinji on occasion resulted in tingling in her stomach and an ache in her womanhood she didn't understand or comprehend, much like she was feeling to a small degree right now. 'Is this longing I am feeling?' She thought to herself as she continued to look at Shinji. Opting to test her theory, Rei leaned in suddenly and pressed her lips against the boy across from her. For a few seconds Rei felt nothing but ridged lips against hers, yet slowly that changed. Pressure was applied back against her lips and it was electric. When she felt something moist riding along the outside of her lips, the surprise caused them to open them and she nearly gagged at the intrusion of Shinji's tongue in her mouth.
Her eyes opened wide in shock yet she kept her place, she noticed Shinji's eyes were closed she did the same. It felt nicer, more relaxing that way. Her body again acting against her will, wrapped her arms softly around his back, she felt him do the same. It was so deliriously new and overwhelming to her. 'I must stop this or I believe I shall faint.' Pushing herself away from Shinji softly, she found a reluctance to do so, but she was able to. Finding Shinji's eyes still shut when she opened hers, "That was most pleasant Ikari-kun."
'I just…I just kissed Rei,' Shinji was still amazed at how soft her lips were, and how it didn't feel bad. It felt like the last kiss he had with Asuka, it was soft yet a caring could be felt within. He didn't feel cheapened by it, nor did he feel he cheapened the other. "I should…should be going Ayanami-san, I'll see you at school tomorrow." Shinji gushed as he a feeling of revulsion waved over him at how easily he accepted things. Rushing out of the apartment before Rei could have said a word edgewise, Shinji was already down the stairs and out of the building.
'I wasn't supposed to enjoy that! I wasn't supposed to do that!' He ranted on himself. Mizuho's words of debasement echoed in his head. He was soiled and used, not fit for the good graces of others. He was an annoyance that had to pay his way or be cast aside. And here he was running his fingers over his lips that had just kissed a girl of their own volition. 'I'll need to apologize to her,' but it felt so nice his mind replied.
It didn't matter much, his increased happiness wasn't to last long. Upon returning home, Misato still gone, Asuka was there to meet him. She asked him where he had been, and when he said Rei's she smacked him. "You're mine Baka. Don't you know that?" Asuka's angry frown turned into a smile. "I think I need to punish you a little. I know you like me and not her so I'll forgive you afterward." Shinji didn't know what to say, he did like her in many ways. Shinji had just finished kissing and massaging Asuka moments before Misato returned.
X-X
Author notes.
Sorry if the Shinji/Rei scene was a bit overdone, and I will go into more details about Shinji and Asuka in the next chapter so no worries their. Hope you enjoyed this chapter and continue to read my stuff. Yeah a lot happened in it, but after the cliffhanger in the last chapter you should have expected a large dose of action. As for Shinji/Rei don't think to deeply yet, haven't thought about pairings in this thing.
And serious thanks go to Zen-chan for prereading and ideas…though I don't know if I like not having more tension between some of the characters.
Laters!