Ichigo sat in the bed and stared at the floor. He had no idea what to do. He didn't understand anything what he was supposed to do. He'd slept little after the night before in the library. It had only been sheer exhaustion that he had fallen asleep. His head was a myriad of twists and turns and he couldn't figure out what was real and what was fake. He started violently when the door opened. He looked up to see it was Gin. Ichigo didn't know what to think now. He was so confused when he looked at him. It wasn't like there hadn't always been something there. It was just he had never acknowledged it. He didn't want to think that he felt something toward someone besides Sōsuke. He looked away from him as Gin sat down beside him.

"Are you feeling okay today?" he asked and for the first time after something like what had happened, Ichigo heard concern in his voice.

"Why wouldn't I be?" he said and crossed his arms again.

"I just…I didn't mean to…and it just happened, and I guess…I'm sorry."

Ichigo reached over and took his hand though. "I know. I just…I want you to know that I…I have felt things here that I didn't think I could feel anymore. Gin, you've known what I've done, and not just the shit Sōsuke made me do. The other things. I know…now, anyways…that the reason I liked the fighting, and hurting people, was because I couldn't fix what was hurting me."

Gin reached over and brushed his hair from is eyes. "Ichigo, what you've done isn't really by your choice."

"Is it? I mean, really is it?" Ichigo put his hands in front of him and stared at them. "You know the things I've done. And they've made me happy. I enjoyed them. I… And not even like Yammy, people who didn't deserve it. Like Shinji. If I hadn't…I got him captured, Gin. I got the others put in there. It was me that did that. I was the one that did that. And now he's acting like I should be worth something to him."

Gin sighed and put his arm around him. "Ichi, baby, you have to let go of it. Shinji knows it. He doesn't blame you. He blames Aizen."

"He should blame me. He should hate me. They all should hate me. Not just for the fact I'm nothing but Sōsuke's whore to do whatever he wants with, but what I did for him. Gin, I hurt people. I killed people for him. Why should anyone have any sympathy for me? I deserve to be treated worse than I already am," he said softly and Gin understood now.

"You go back because you're punishing yourself don't you?" he said softly. "You think you deserve to be treated this way. That's why you don't fight back."

Ichigo looked at him. "Why should I Gin? From the beginning, Gin…I just…I can't do this." He stood up and turned away from him. "I can't be happy like this. I'm happy with Sōsuke because it hurts so much," he whispered.

Gin stood and put his arms around him from behind. "Ichi, please. You deserve to be treated well. You deserve to make your own choices, really make them, instead of doing what you think you have to do in order to punish yourself."

Ichigo bit his lip. "Look, how about I just…just let this…whatever it is…happen and I'll do my best to be happy now," he said and turned back around in Gin's grip.

Gin smiled at him and put both hands on his face. "Okay," he said and leaned forward to capture his lips. Ichigo flinched a bit but then let it happen, melting into the gentleness that his hands used.

Ichigo felt the world spin and he was sitting on Gin's lap facing him now. He felt hot all over but he just let Gin's hands glide over his back and he leaned into him to kiss him again. He gasped a breath and put his head down on Gin's shoulder and just let himself float between what he knew was real and the things in his mind that were screaming that he shouldn't be doing this because he did not deserve to have such kindness. He gasped as he felt Gin's hands slide down the swell of his ass and squeeze. He felt so strange like this, and he wanted more from him. He wanted everything from him. Ichigo turned and began kissing and licking at Gin's neck as his hands flexed over his shoulders.

"You know, Aizen has no idea how to handle you," Gin breathed into Ichigo's ear.

Ichigo couldn't answer, though. He let out a small noise as he felt Gin slide his hand down and under him. He slid fingers back and forth over his entrance. It was a ghost of a touch and just enough that he was panting with want from it.

"See, I figured out a while back," Gin continued, sliding the tip of his middle finger into him and pulling back. "You respond so well to gentle things. You'll let someone force themselves on you with violence, but you never respond to them. You never respond to Aizen unless he forces it from you." Gin's finger teased him again and this time moaned out loud. "But this, the gentle and easy touching and petting. I could hold you all day like this," he said and finally sunk his finger into him. Ichigo whimpered then, and Gin could feel his heart beating hard against him. "See, look," he said as he moved his other hand between them and slid it down the front.

Ichigo was lost between sensation and need. He felt Gin grasp him and he almost lost it right then. He'd never had such hair trigger for his body before. Was Gin right? Was the violence Sōsuke used the opposite of what he needed? He let out another moan as he felt Gin slide another finger into him and quickly followed it with a third. He whined against his throat as Gin's hand began working him. What was he doing? He thought he was doing this so he could fuck him again. But he wasn't giving any indication that he wanted anything out of the encounter.

"I knew, when I'd put the bandages on you, and I'd rub the salves into your bruises," Gin said as he began slipping his fingers up against his sweet spot slowly. "You needed it. Those nice things I could give you." Ichigo was gripping him harder now. "And it doesn't matter what you give me," Gin said as his hands began to slide faster over his cock and prostate. Ichigo felt the world crash around him and he nearly screamed into Gin's shoulder, digging his fingers into his back. "That's it," Gin whispered to him as he clutched him against him as he came down. "There, I want you to feel good and satisfied for the first time, Ichi, you, not me," he whispered as he wiped his hand on the cover beside him. He just held him for a long time as he panted against him.

Ichigo had no idea what to think about this. He'd never had someone just do something to pleasure him like that. He just clung to Gin for a long time until he let exhaustion take him. Gin moved back on the bed and leaned against the wall, still clutching Ichigo to his chest. He looked up as the door opened and Shinji came in. He stared at them and shook his head.

"So, now you come jerk him off and finger fuck him to sleep, eh?" he commented.

Gin glared at him. "Why are you so vulgar?" he said with a sigh.

Shinji shrugged. "Just the way I am. Seemed to work. Kisuke said he slept all of two hours last night after he came back here. He was pacing most the night."

Shinji dropped beside Gin on the bed and ran his hand over Ichigo's head. "Heard what he said though. Chased Hiyori and Kisuke outta the observation booth when you started swapping spit. They wanted to watch, told them to fuck off."

Gin sighed. "They'll just pull up the feed in the surveillance office. Not like they could see anything, though, had may hands in his pants."

"So, what did you come in here for anyway? I mean, I know you didn't just come to jerk him off on some random whim. If so, you need to come find me now and then," he muttered and leaned his head back against the wall.

Gin sighed. "I just…wanted him to see that he could get something without having expectation that he had to give something in return. I don't know, maybe I shouldn't have…" he said with a sigh.

"I know," Shinji said as he reached and ruffled his hair thoughtfully. "He feels so guilty for everything, doesn't he?"

Gin nodded. "Yeah, I don't know how to convince him that it's okay, that no one blames him."

Shinji sighed and leaned into Gin and felt the exhaustion pulling at him as well. He hadn't slept well at all. To his surprise he felt Gin reach an arm around him and squeeze him against him. He hummed and fell into a restless sleep beside him.

-oooooo-OOOOOO-oooooo-

Isshin sat in the observation room and watched the monitors as his son was sleeping in a man's lap that he swore he would murder one day. He'd watched from the security room and heard what Ichigo had said. Watching his son…in this…was so much harder than he expected. He wanted to take him away from Gin. He wanted to tell him to leave him alone. But he couldn't at all. The boy, no, man, in that room didn't need him telling him what to do, father or not. He sighed, realizing that no matter what, his son needed love. He'd spent so long equating sex with love, to have now Shinji and Gin show him that they actually cared about him more than what he could give them.

"The guilt is going to eat him alive," Kisuke said as he came into the room. Isshin looked up at him. "Until he can figure out how to put the blame on Aizen instead of himself, he'll never heal."

Kisuke sat down beside him and sighed. "I know this is hard for you, watching your son like this. I can't imagine having to sit here as two people do these things with him."

"I know he needs it," Isshin said as he watched as Gin's head fell back into the wall and he too dropped off into a doze. "I know that he doesn't understand the difference between love and what Aizen did to him."

Kisuke nodded slowly. "I just…we both know that it won't last. This peace he has."

"This peace?" Isshin said with a cocked brow. "You call this peace?"

"Yeah, because I fear that there's a storm coming soon."

-oooooo-OOOOOO-oooooo-

"Come on, you have to come out," Shinji said as he held onto Ichigo's hand the next morning.

"Why?" he asked as Shinji led him out the door.

"Because the only time you leave that room can't be for me to fuck you," Shinji said with a smirk. "I mean, it can, I guess, I wouldn't mind," he said as he pulled Ichigo in and nipped at his ear.

Ichigo slapped him away. "Stop it," he muttered as he took him down the corridors toward the cafeteria.

"Let's have something for food you've chosen…" Shinji started but realized that Ichigo had stopped and was staring ahead. "What is it?" Shinji asked and looked up as someone came over quickly to Ichigo and threw arms around hi m.

"Ichi! They said you were here!" Tesla said with a sad smile.

"T-telsa?" he asked with a frown. "What are you doing here…" Ichigo stared as he saw Nnoitra. "Wha…"

Nnoitra came over and put an arm around Tesla and looked at Ichigo. "Yo, so, fancy meeting you here…"

Ichigo had no idea what to think. "How…what are you doing here?"

Shinji smiled. "Nnoitra turned on Aizen. He brought Tesla here out of Barragan's place. We're helping them both get the help they need."

Ichigo couldn't understand this. Nnoitra was one of Aizen's best men, his Espada…what was he doing turning on him? He didn't know what to think, though. After all, his own situation was definitely not normal.

"So by the look, looks like Strawberry boy found out what having someone give a shit is," Nnoitra said with a shrug.

"What?" Ichigo said looking at him.

"You, finally figuring out that Aizen is fucking abusive, using bastard," Nnoitra said. "We all know it, you know. He doesn't care about you. He finds it entertaining to watch you do what he says, and listen to his orders."

Ichigo stared at him and then looked away. "I know, but I love him."

Nnoitra blinked. "What?"

"I still love him, and I'm still going back!" Ichigo growled and pushed past them. Shinji sighed and went after him.

"Come on," he said as he grabbed his hand and pulled him away. "Not the cafeteria. Maybe the pool."

"Pool?" Ichigo asked as he followed Shinji.

A few minutes later they came into a room with a pool that was more like a hot tub, but not quite as warm. Shinji stripped off his clothes and turned to Ichigo.

"Well, come on," he said with a smirk.

Ichigo shook his head in confusion and slowly took off the scrubs that he was wearing. He stepped into the water carefully and before he knew it, Shinji had him pressed into the side. He gasped as he felt him sliding his hands over his back. "I do like seeing all of you," he muttered as he began sucking at the back of his neck.

"What…what are doing…" he gasped as he felt Shinji sliding fingers into him. "Ah! What…" he sighed though and put his head on the side of the pool and panted. "You said…we weren't…leaving for this…"

"Hmm, I might have lied," he muttered as he nipped at the side of his neck. After about ten minutes of intensely fingering him into a mewling mess they heard a yell.

"Hey!" Shinji looked up and grinned at Lisa. "Get the fuck out of the goddamn pool with that, you nasty bastards!"

Ichigo was going to respond but Shinji shoved his fingers into his prostate hard and he gasped out a low moan. He continued as he spoke. "Like you and Hiyori don't fuck in here. And I know Rose and Kensei have gone at it more than once."

Ichigo couldn't believe he was still finger fucking him as he spoke calmly to Lisa. He couldn't even articulate a coherent sentence from Shinji torturing his prostate. Lisa growled. "Shinji, I will fucking douse your food with laxative for a week and you'll never know where it came from if you don't take your fucking somewhere else."

"Hmm, how about outside the water?"

"No! I do not want to see any nasty man pieces and bits! I'm a fucking lesbian for a reason!" she growled.

"Well, if I put a towel around his waist, my cock is gonna be buried in his ass so you won't see it…" he said as he elicited more sounds out of Ichigo.

"Get the fuck out!" she screamed.

"You're no fun," he grumbled as he moved back and got out. "Turn around unless you wanna see my cock."

"Ugh!" she said with a roll of her eyes as she turned around.

Shinji smirked and dressed quickly and then looked at Ichigo who looked positively debouched clinging to the side of the pool. "Come on, babe, finish this elsewhere where nasty lesbians don't chase us off from our fun," he said and pulled him up out of the water. Ichigo stumbled, dealing with a state of arousal that was making him wince at every move. Shinji got him into his clothes and led him away.

"Oh, gods, why do you guys have to do this to me," Ichigo muttered as he was slammed into the wall and Shinji started sucking on his collarbone.

"Because, you are so beautiful when you're in ecstasy. I just…I want to see it as much as I can before you're gone," he whispered as he bit gently into his flesh.

Ichigo had no voice to argue as he hooked a leg around Shinji's hip and felt like he was going to come apart.

-oooooo-OOOOOO-oooooo-

Aizen yawned and looked up as Szayel came into the room. "Ah, Szayelaporro, please tell me, is the test ready?"

Szayel looked at him with a nod. He'd tried everything to put this off. He'd done everything to delay it. He couldn't delay him forever though. If he found out he was delaying them, Szayel knew he was dead. He swallowed hard and handed the tablet to him.

"So everything is functioning?" Aizen asked.

"Yes, sir. The…the list of boosters available is there on the right, and the full response can be elicited by the scale on the left. I wouldn't recommend using the…" Szayel tried to tell him.

"You're excused, I created the thing to start with, you are simply doing the leg work. I know how my own inventions functions work. Go along back to your lab, little rat," he said as he flicked through the settings. "Nice try on altering the settings though, almost got away with it. We'll discuss it when the whore is back in my hands."

Szayel swallowed thickly. He ducked his head and left him. He wanted to tell someone what was happening, but he had no way. He didn't think that Aizen would ever complete the research, but he had. After many deaths of innocents, he'd finally perfected it. Ichigo had no idea that the implant in his shoulder had never been removed. He had no idea that Aizen never intended to ever let him get away from him.

He didn't know how to help this. He sighed and put his head in his hands. This was going to destroy Gin, he thought to himself. He just hoped that somehow, the system malfunctioned. He knew that it was unlikely.

-oooooo-OOOOOO-oooooo-

Tōsen sat on the porch and listened as the sun set slowly. Beside him, the boy lay with his head on the back of one of the dogs. He was content for the first time in a long time. He heard the door opened and closed and Sajin sat down beside him.

"Is it pretty?" Tōsen asked.

"It is. The sky is lit up in shades of orange and red as the sun sets, and there are light wispy clouds that look like light is exploding behind them. The sun is deep red in color right now and it is almost gone behind the horizon."

Tōsen nodded. "Lovely. I wonder what the future holds."

"Why?" Sajin asked suddenly.

Tōsen didn't need an explanation. "I thought…I thought that he was just and right. I thought that the only way to achieve elimination of criminality was to take true control of criminal elements and dismantle them from within. I did not expect that Aizen would never do what he had promised. What the Shinigami were doing did not work, and I wanted to do more."

Sajin nodded and sipped his tea. "I'm glad you understand now."

"I was blind," Tōsen said and snorted. "In more than one way," he muttered. "I didn't understand what he was doing. I thought that there was no way that my friend could be doing something so wrong."

"I don't think Aizen was ever really anyone's friend. How could you stay with what he did to the Kurosaki boy? He kidnapped him. How could that have been in anyone's best interest?" he said softly.

Tōsen sighed. "I honestly didn't think of it. I ignored it because if I didn't I would doubt what I was there for. I turned my head and looked away too many times. I think seeing the boy, in that condition, and finding this one who Aizen would simply kill…I realized that I had been hiding from the truth. I did not want to admit that I chose wrongly. I did not want to see that I had chosen the unjust path."

Sajin nodded and sipped his tea. Wonderweiss sat up and looked at them. He smiled and crawled up into Tōsen's lap, surprising him. Sajin watched as Tōsen just put his arms around him and smiled softly. Could it be that one person could change someone so much in such a short amount of time? He looked up as Luna came out and though, why yes, yes it can.

-oooooo-OOOOOO-oooooo-

Ichigo couldn't feel much by the time he made it back to his room. He clung to Shinji though until he dropped him in the small bed and climbed in beside him. He smiled at him.

"Shinji, I can't move again," Ichigo muttered.

"Well, you don't have to," Shinji muttered as he slid his hand over to Ichigo's cock. Ichigo gasped.

"What are you doing?" he asked.

"You'll see," he said as he worked Ichigo into arousal again. "The ability of you young bucks to cum again and again," he muttered as he smirked at him.

Ichigo rolled his eyes up his head. "Shinji, I can't…I don't think I can do it again…"

"You don't have to," he muttered as he pulled a packet from his pocket and a condom. He winked at him and to Ichigo's confusion, Shinji slid the condom down on him. Ichigo stared.

"Wait, are you…" he said and before he could say anything else, Shinji and slicked Ichigo with the lube and positioned himself over him.

"Unless, of course, you don't want to…" Shinji said as he held himself over him on his knees. "I mean, I just thought you might want to give as well as receive…"

Ichigo just nodded then gasped as Shinji slid himself down in one move. Shinji let out a low moan and he sat against his hips. "Fuck, been a while…" he muttered as he sat still for a moment.

"Don't…don't hurt…yourself…" Ichigo said as he panted. Shinji smiled and started moving on him.

"Don't worry, Ichi, when I said that you would be able to take two cocks, it was personal experience…" he muttered as he slowly rode him until he found the spot he was looking for. "Um, there," he muttered and then worked his body slowly before pitching up to a more frantic pace.

Ichigo had never done this, and he was not really sure how to feel about it. He reached up though and clung his hands onto Shinji's hips as he watched him move his body over him. He felt Shinji's body clenching him and he was about to go over the edge again.

"Shin…Shinji…I'm…" he gasped out.

"S'okay, me too," he muttered as he began to move faster and to Ichigo's surprise, Shinji went without having his own cock touched at all. When Shinji's body spasmed around him he went immediately, the heat and pressure making it impossible for him not to go over. Shinji fell forward onto him and smiled.

"Hmm, looks like you aren't a bad top, huh?" Shinji said as he kissed his chest.

"You said…you did two?" Ichigo said, actually interested.

"I told you Rose likes to fuck," he muttered as he rolled off Ichigo to his side. "And well, so does Kensei and Love. So we had some fun a few times. Took a while but I got to the point I took both Kensei and Love. Rose liked to watch it and suck me off while he jerked himself off," Shinji said with a yawn. "Rose has calmed down a bit, but he's still a horny bitch."

Ichigo got up and used the bathroom and came back. Shinji had dressed and sat on the bed now and waited. "How do you feel now?" he asked.

Ichigo nodded. "I really can't explain how I feel, Shinji. I know…I know it shouldn't make a big difference…" Ichigo turned and looked at him. "But I…"

Ichigo stopped talking and stared blankly at Shinji for a moment. Shinji frowned. "Ichigo?"

Ichigo's eyes crossed and then Shinji gasped out loud. "Oh fuck!"

Shinji tried to get out the door, but he wasn't fast enough as Ichigo grabbed his ankle and twisted him to the floor. He panted and looked up. "Ichigo!" he yelled at him as he held his hands on Ichigo's shoulders. "Listen! You can hear me!"

Ichigo couldn't though, as he jerked his arm and punched down hard into Shinji's face. Shinji passed out immediately. Ichigo stood up and went for the door. He stood there for a long moment. Someone opened it from the outside, Ichigo just ran through them, and out of the room. He skidded to a stop at the end of the hallway where Isshin was standing.

"Ichigo!" Isshin said and Ichigo looked at him. Isshin stepped back. "What the hell?"

The color in his sclera had bled completely black, the irises turning golden, and he looked at Isshin like he didn't know him. He turned and ran back the other way. Isshin went after him, but it didn't take long for Ichigo to manage getting out of the building, with more than a few broken doors in the process. Isshin went into the room and brought Shinji around.

"Ah," he muttered as the salts hit his nose. "Where…where's he gone…" he muttered.

"What was that?" Isshin asked.

"The implants…he must never have taken Ichigo's out…" he said as he sat up slowly. "The chemicals…they increase adrenaline, cortisol, and it offers a vehicle to communicate commands through given inputs of certain chemicals. I'm guessing the command was to come back to him."

"To Aizen?"

Shinji nodded as he got to his feet. "Yeah, that's what the experiments were for. He was trying to make the perfect soldiers. Stronger, faster, and completely obedient. That's why he used Ichigo, he wanted him to be the first that it worked on. Looks like he managed to get it figured out finally…"