Disclaimer: I do not own anything recognizable. Manny and Brett are my only OCs in this chapter.

Cure for the Common Man

"A Whole New Species"

-9-

April 14, 2012

I sniffled, wiped a few tears away with the back of my hand, and then I wiped my nose with my sleeve.

They declared that year '2012' would be the year of the Apocalypse and stuff, and deep down, I always doubted it, but I never really knew.

So Random! coming to an end really was like the apocalypse. It sucked, horribly. It was the show that made me. It was the show that introduced me to all of my friends (Lucy moved to Berlin – therefore, I lost contact with her). It was the show that introduced Grady to Portlyn. The show that helped me pair Tawni and James back up (with my help)…

The show that introduced me to Chad Dylan Cooper.

Chad.

Dylan.

Cooper.

My heart gave an inconveniently heart-wrenching tug at the thought of him. It was safe to say that we had, unabashedly flirted with each other from the day that we met. Somewhere along the way, I think that I fell for him. Maybe it wasn't love, but he did have my heart. At least a little chunk of it. The sunny part of Sonny, if you will.

And with the end of So Random!, my life felt like it was being tossed head-first into a boiling vat of depression. I was going to be Tawni-less, Grady-less, Zora-less, and Nico-less. Most of all, I was going to be Chad-less.

Chad Dylan Cooper-less.

I let out a bitter sigh and looked around my dressing room for one last time. I was used to seeing all of Tawni's makeup, all of my stuffed animals, and lots of shag carpet/rug things mixed with pink. Over the years, Tawni and I had hauled in a lot of things. We had knickknacks from all of our trips. We had a collectible spoon wall, and an award wall. Then, after I had finally talked Tawni into it, we had our 'Award Winning Dresses Wall'. All capitalization, all in pink.

Now, all of it was gone. Our old dressing room looked as depressed as I was. I was not happy. I was not cheerful. I didn't even feel like cracking one joke (which really, really disturbed me). Losing So Random! was like losing myself. I had become a part of it, and it had become a part of me.

It felt like a loved one had died, and I was about to go to its funeral, and then walk off and leave it behind.

I was terrified.

"Sonny," Ever so slowly, a hand was being placed on my wrist, and I looked up to see Tawni.

That's another thing. Over the years, our personal bubbles had kind of dissolved. We had become sisters. "Everyone's ready. We'd better go."

I gulped, shut my eyes, stepped out, and let my friend close the door behind me. Then I smiled, said a praise for Tawni's engagement ring (because if you didn't compliment it every five minutes, she'd kill you), and walked down the hallway.

Marshall was there, barking orders, but I could see the tears threatening to slip through his eyes. Grady was flirting in an unashamed way with Portlyn, his 'girlfriend'. (Believe me, when we found out, it took all of us by surprise).

Then there was Nico, chewing on his cigarette and touching his Fedora every now and then. Zora, of course, was on her cell phone, barking orders to some poor person somewhere in the world.

All of these things, I would miss.

Especially the Prop House.

Especially my dressing room.

Especially my friends, and the craziness that makes them up.

"So," What seemed like hours later, Marshall finally clapped his hands and all of us stopped what we were doing (or thinking). "It's over guys."

I think that he sniffled. I think that he might've shed one tear. But then, after that, he walked off of the set, and out of the doors, leaving the five of us, excluding Portlyn and some other people I didn't care for, to stare helplessly at one another.

---

After what seemed like hours, all of us had finally said goodbye. It was tearful, painful, and heart-wrenching, but somehow, we had managed to say it.

Sure, they had offered me Oprah's old time slot. Sure, they had offered me tens of dozens of movie roles, but nothing would ever compare to the sketches on my old comedy show.

Fact: I would miss it quite terribly.

Strangely enough though, saying "goodbye" to my old – silly word- show wasn't the toughest part.

Saying goodbye to Chad was.

While I was walking up to him, Chad in all of his glory, was leaning up against a thick, round post that had Mackenzie Falls plastered across it. He was also looking as sexy as ever, which was kind of a problem for me.

When I finally reached him, I noticed that the sky happened to match the blueness of Chad's eyes perfectly. My heart lifted. Then, when Chad lifted one hand, it shattered.

He had noticed my appearance, so what?

"Munroe," He drew my surname out in his slow, sexy voice, and my shattered heart sped up a little bit. Was he going to at least give me a goodbye kiss? It would be the only suitable way to say goodbye…

I mean, after at least three years, maybe more, of knowing each other, he should definitely kiss me.

I wanted him to kiss me.

I was going to make him kiss me.

"Chad," I gave him my best flirtatious smile accompanied by my flirtiest tone. His expression, however, hadn't changed one bit.

"Good. We're on a first name basis now." He smirked, and I rolled my eyes, playing along.

"I never said your last name in the first place," I objected.

"But you wanted to." He wiggled his eyebrows, or at least attempted to. Guys.

Now, how to make him kiss me…

"I never wanted to, Chad." I took a daring step towards him, pressed my palms against his chest, and whispered the words into his ear. I was nearly positive that he shivered, and that made me all too happy. Unfortunately though, I forced myself to pull away.

"Interesting, Sonny." Chad finally choked out, his cheeks turning red.

I grinned to myself, knowing that I finally had him.

"So," Chad's tone grew serious, and I closed my eyes in anticipation. This had to be it!

"Your show's really over, huh?" I took a fumbled step back, and looked at him inquisitively. I had just flirted with Chad in an overly obvious way, and normally, he would've flirted with me. Yes, my show was over. Yes, my heart had previously been broken. Now though, I just wanted Chad. I wanted Chad to give me a damn kiss.

"Yeah. So what?" I said quickly, repressing a groan of frustration. At this, Chad looked a little taken aback.

"Don't you-" Chad coughed, "Aren't you scared? Or sad?" I scoffed. Where did he get off being so sympathetic? Tell me, where?

"Why in the hell would I be scared, Chad? And sad? I've had so many offers that it isn't even funny." If he had caught up with me an hour earlier and asked me these things, I would've flung myself into his arms and cried. But he didn't. And over that period of time (say, the last fifty seconds), I've realized that Chad has a disease. Guy Disease.

"I just thought-"

"You thought wrong, Cooper." With that, I turned on my heel and I walked away. Turns out saying goodbye wasn't so difficult after all.

Ooo000ooO

In my defense, I was waiting for Sonny.

I knew that she would be depressed. I knew that she would be heartbroken. She loved her show, just as much as I liked her.

Then, when I saw her walking up to me, her shoulders slumped and her eyes having this distant look in them, I knew that she needed a hug. I also knew that she needed to be cheered up, hence the reasons why I flirted with her a little bit.

But when I offered her one lick of sympathy. When I gave her the opportunity to breakdown and fall into my arms, she didn't. She acted like a jerk. She acted like a Sonny that I hadn't seen before, and who I'd never want to be friends with.

She wasn't my Sonny. She was just this cold, cruel stranger who couldn't wait to get the hell away from me.

It hurt.

It hurt like hell.

When the time came that I was finally ready for her, she turned me down in the worst way.

Then, when she walked away, I stuck my hand inside of my pocket and pulled out the little pack of Kleenexes. I had brought them for her. I also had an overstuffed panda bear (her favorite) lying somewhere back in my dressing room.

Turns out, the tissues and the panda would just be mine, after all. Not Sonny. Never Sonny.

And it killed me, because I knew that the last time that I saw her for a while would be a bad memory.

Ooo000ooO

I felt odd. Not goofy, or happy, or depressed. I just felt odd.

I was sitting by myself at a sports bar, slurping down a glass of Pepsi, and trying to shut out the rest of the world.

Chad would never be in my life again, I was sure of that. And sure, I acted like a cold bitch towards him, walked away from him, and then, when I was far enough, I burst it to tears. Some think that acting like a jerk to cover up your feelings is just a myth. It's not. It helped me.

Heck, while I was talking to Chad, I actually believed that I felt that way towards him…Cold, like I didn't care.

I did care, though. I cared way too much. I had a chance (maybe), but I blew it. What's done was done, and you can definitely never change the past.

Your future, however, is still up for grabs.

That's something that's always bothered me. The future. God knows what's going to happen to me in my future, but I don't. How is that fair?

He knew that I was going to blow it with Chad. He knew that I was going to make a fool of myself. He knew that I was going to spill my whole damn day to the father-like bartender who was most definitely not interested.

God knew.

I, however, was the unknowing, dimwitted brunette blowing bubbles in her Pepsi. So much for my life.

"Hey, kid," Manny, the bartender looked me up and down carefully, and then stared at my half-full glass (trying to be optimistic, here).

"Yes, sir?" I blinked, trying to look innocent.

"You blew it." He placed a bottle of Windex down on the counter, and looked at me grimly. "We all blow it."

"But I-" Manny held up his hands, stopping me.

"No 'buts', kid. You're going to move on with your life. You're going to do great things, and meet great people. You're going to get over your depression, get over your mistakes, and wake up, kid." Manny paused, and I blew out a slow breath, trying to make sense of what he was saying.

"I'd just like to rewind my life a little bit. Is that really so much to ask?" I was twirling my straw around in the soda, making fuzz pop up on top.

"Kind of," Somehow, a rag magically appeared in Manny's hands, and he plopped it down on the counter next to the Windex. "The only good Boss Man knows what He's doing. He might be insulted if you managed to do that."

"Ah, well," I sighed, shoving my soda away. It was about time that I left. As I turned my head to look towards the exit though, two guys that I recognized came in (separately).

One was David Henrie, a guy madly and unrequitedly in love with his costar.

The other one was Brett Smith.

I swallowed the lump in my throat as he walked over and slid in a booth next to some cute preppy girl. Probably, his girlfriend.

I used to be his girlfriend.

Four years ago, when I was back in Wisconsin and going to a regular school, Brett asked me out on a date. We went out from January first until Christmas Eve of that year.

On Christmas Eve, I dumped him because of the Christmas "present" that he had "bought" me. A paper towel rack.

What in the hell was I going to do with a paper towel rack?

Drowning out the memories, I looked over at Manny, offered him a tight smile, and walked out of the comfy sports bar. That night, I went home and watched Hitch for the second time of my life. That was when everything started to come together.

I had helped Tawni with James, and I had helped a few other friends pair up with their perfect match. So, that night, I felt that God had made me watch Hitch for a reason. He knew.

I was supposed to be a matchmaker.

…Or something like it.

I was going to delete all of the Chad Dylan Coopers in this world, and create a whole new species of perfect men.

A/N: Hey guys! Just in case any of you are confused, I wanted to do a little timeline for you:

This story begins in 2014, where Sonny is 21/22 (I'm not really going by Demi's birthday). This flashback, where So Random! ends, takes place in 2012, where she's 19/20. Sonny's breakup with Brett takes place in 2008 where she's 15/16. I hope that that clears things up for you.

SO – Did you have a great Thanksgiving? We sure did. Gained 10 pounds (not exactly). With the long weekend, I thought that I would've gotten ahead with writing this, but nope. Unexpectedly, we had company stay, and they kept me busy.

Now it's time for Christmas, decorating, and…my birthday! But mostly…Christmas. Do you guys have any special things planned/traditions?

For the end note – New Moon. The day that it came out, we went to the 12:01 showing. People were screaming (especially when Jake took his shirt off), and laughing. I thought that it was better done than the first. Your thoughts?