+ WARNINGS: Tyson/Brooklyn situations, but nothing hardcore. Erm… Swearing? I think that's about it 0o

+ Disclaimer: … I have nothing to say… For they are all MINE! MWAHAHAHAHAhahahahahaha! Ahem.

+ A/N: I love how these chapters are getting pretty well-received now. It makes me happy :) Anyhoo, onwards and upwards with the next chapter, and thanks for all your reviews last time. Enjoy!

Confessions Of A Blader

Chapter 10: Honking It Like There's No Tomorrow

Saturday 5th October '07

5.30 in the am

Do you know WHY I am awake at 5.30 in the morning on a Saturday?

No?

Tyson and bloody Brooklyn.

At it.

Again.

A minute later

"Dude, can you film us again?"

"Not a chance, Tyson. I really want to sleep right now."

"Sleep? You won't be able to sleep with us making a noise."

I hate him.

A minute later

Why are they so LOUD? Jesus Christ, surely they can be just a tad quieter during their sexytime? But no. I swear they're just being loud to piss me off. Why can't they just bugger off to Brooklyn's room?

Oh, yeah. Garland doesn't appreciate any sexytime happening in his room. Not even himself with someone. Maybe he's asexual?

5 minutes later

I officially had enough of them, and so I have kicked them both out of the room. Butt-naked. Mwahahaha.

30 seconds later (no, not 'To Mars' hahaha)

I would like to point out that it was them butt-naked and being kicked out of the room. Not me butt-naked kicking them out of the room.

A minute later

They are banging on the door, shouting and begging me to let them back in. Not a chance, mon amigos. You had no consideration when you were having sexytime and I was trying to sleep, and so therefore you is being punished.

A particularly loud thud just snapped me out of my evil laughing. I open the door just enough to see their pissed-off faces looking at me.

"Yeeeees?" I said.

"Let us in," Tyson said.

"Sorry, Max isn't home right now. Please come back and honk the horn later. Goodbye." I shut the door again, laughing my head off.

5 seconds later

Really wishing I hadn't mentioned honking the horn. Because now Tyson is honking it like there's no tomorrow. And I don't say that every day.

5.45 in the am

Tyson is still honking the horn, Brooklyn is hammering on the door… And who's that? Oh, good. Tala has wandered into the corridor outside and is now shouting at Tyson. Who is still honking that bloody horn. Oh, and now Kai is hammering on the wall in between our rooms.

Between them, they are going to wake the whole bloody school up.

6.00 in the am

They're still going at it. Oo-er. Except, Kai has stopped hammering on the wall, and has also walked out into the corridor and is shouting at Brooklyn by the sounds of things. Tala is still shouting at Tyson, who is still honking the horn.

I cannot stop laughing. It's too funny.

6.10 in the am

Uh oh. All the noise has woken up the entire corridor, and someone went to fetch Mrs McFahrt.

"WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU BOYS ARE DOING? AND WHY ARE YOU TWO NAKED?!"

Hahaha, I'd forgotten Tyson and Brooklyn were still naked. That will take some explaining. Actually… That'll also lead to the fact that they're only out there making a noise in the first place because I locked them out of the room.

Ah.

Maybe if I just pretend that I went back to sleep as soon as they were locked out…

Oh, yeah right. Like anyone would be able to sleep through that. Even everyone else was woken up, so how the Hell would I pretend that I was asleep even though it was all happening outside my door?

5 seconds later

I'm just a very heavy sleeper.

5 seconds later

Even that wouldn't work. Because then I'd have to explain why I'd gotten woken up by their sexytime if I'm a heavy sleeper.

Bloody Hell.

A minute later

I can hear Mrs McFahrt arguing with Tala and Kai. While they're arguing, I could escape through the window.

30 seconds later

No, that wouldn't work.

1) We're on the second floor, so I'd surely die from impact.

2) How would that explain Tyson and Brooklyn being naked in the corridor, and locked out of the room? With the room being locked from the inside?

3) The window has bars on, anyway. I think to stop anyone getting out/in. Again, we're on the second floor, so why would we need bars?

A minute later

I'm just going to have to grab my balls (not literally) and walk out of the room and explain that it was all Tyson's and Brooklyn's fault. Well, if I don't walk out any time soon, Mrs McFahrt will break the door down, as she's knocking on it so hard.

"MAX TATE! WILL YOU GET YOUR PESKY LITTLE ARSE OUT HERE NOW!"

Personally, I don't think that's any way to talk to students.

6.20 in the am

So. Here we all are. Me, Kai, Tala, Tyson and Brooklyn (both still naked), and Mrs McFahrt, all stood out in the corridor. Watching each other. Eyes darting back and forth. Daring each other to make up a stupid excuse.

"Well…" I began. "What happened was…"

"Shut your mouth, Tate. We really don't want to know," Tala snapped.

"I do want an explanation, boys," Mrs McFahrt said.

"Do we need to explain why we're naked?" Tyson asked.

"No," McFahrt replied.

"Good. Can we go and put some clothes on, now?" Tyson asked.

"You're not going anywhere until I know why you were all out here making the biggest racket I've ever known," McFahrt said.

"In my defence, I wasn't out here making a noise," I said.

"No, but if you hadn't locked these two," McFahrt said, pointing to Brooklyn and Tyson, "out of the room, then no one would have been making a noise."

"Oh, so it's all MY fault?!" I said, frowning.

"Damn right it is," Tyson said.

"Max, please explain why everyone is out in the corridor," McFahrt said to me.

Oh God. I just knew the entire story was going to burst out of me.

"Well, first it was like, 5.30 in the am, and I was like 'groan', because I heard Tyson and Brooklyn going 'groan, oooh more, and yes, yes, yes!'. So then I was like 'stop having sex please', but then Tyson was like 'er, no'. So then I was like 'er, yes', and then Tyson goes 'can you film us again, please?' So I was like 'er, no. Stop having sexytime now, please'. But they didn't, they just carried on. So I got annoyed and threw them out naked. As in, I wasn't naked throwing them out, but the were naked being thrown out. I mean look at them. Anyway, so then they were like 'RAWWWR' and they were shouting through the door saying 'please let us back in', but I was like 'NOOOO, you will just fuck each other again'. So then they knocked on the door, and I opened it, and I said 'sorry, Max isn't here, please honk later'. So then Tyson was like 'HOOOONKKKK!' and Brooklyn was shouting through the door I think. He might've been knocking, too. Then Kai started banging on the wall, which isn't a new thing, he does it quite a lot. And then Tala was outside shouting and swearing at Tyson, who was still honking. Then Kai joined them outside, and was shouting at Brooklyn and Tala was still shouting at Tyson, who was still honking, and then the whole corridor got woken up, and I was laughing because it was very amusing, and then some total DICKHEAD went and snitched and brought you up here, and now we're here, if you get what I mean."

5 seconds later

Everyone just stood and looked at me as though I'd grown another head.

"Well, thank you for that Max… But that doesn't explain why you have a hamster on your shoulder," Mrs McFahrt said.

I looked at my right shoulder. HOW DID I NOT NOTICE THAT BIBBET WAS THERE?!

"Err… Maybe this place is infested?" I suggested.

"You know full well that we don't allow pets at this school," McFahrt scowled.

"It's not my bloody hamster! It's Tyson's!" I said angrily.

Tyson walked over to me, still completely starkers, and took Bibbet off my shoulder.

"Is he being mean, Bibbet?" Tyson cooed at the bloody thing.

6.35 in the am

So, after a thorough telling-off from Head Fart about having a pet at school (the whole honking, noise and nakedness issue was somehow forgotten), we were all allowed to go back to our rooms.

Brooklyn kindly offered to go back to his own room, and now Tyson is pouting at me.

"Why are you pouting at me?" I ask him.

"Because, thanks to you, I never got to finish my sexytime with Brooklyn," Tyson said.

"Yeah, and? You'll get many other opportunities. McFahrt also let you keep that bloody hamster. I think you should be quite happy."

At that, Tyson grinned at me and started stroking said hamster, which was perched on his head.

10.35 in the am

Woaahhhh. I totally don't remember falling back asleep. But then, I was rudely woken up at 5.30. By Tyson and Brooklyn.

Hang on, where is Tyson? Surely he went back to sleep as well?

Lunch

I swear Mariam is following me. When I woke back up, I went for a walk down by the river, and she just happened to be going there, too. When I came back up to the school, she was behind me, and now I'm in the canteen with Tyson, and she's sat at the table next to ours.

… She must be following me.

"I wonder how good Tala is at wanking someone off," Tyson said randomly.

I looked up to see him staring at Tala, who was sat with Bryan and Spencer, but Kai wasn't there. How bizarre. Also, it's rare to see Spencer and Bryan around. They just seem to disappear.

"Tala's pretty good, actually," I said without thinking. Oh, shit. Tyson was giving me a look.

"And you know that HOW?" he enquired.

I glanced sideways, and saw that Mariam wasn't really eating anything, but she seemed alert, like she was listening to our conversation.

"Err, Kai told me," I lied.

Tyson saw right through that, though. He knows as well as I do that Kai would never tell anyone about his and Tala's sex life.

"Yeah, like Hell he did. Have you been wanked off by Tala?" Tyson whispered.

"Erm… No…" I replied.

"You so have, haven't you?"

"Well… Er, sort of."

"OH MY GOD!" Tyson shouted. Everyone looked at him. "YOU REALLY HAVE BEEN WANKED OFF BY TALA, HAVEN'T YOU?!"

Oh, thank you, Tyson. Excuse me as I die from mortification. If that's a word.

5 minutes later

The entire canteen is talking about Tala wanking me off now. Even the dinner ladies. A few people have come up to me and asked me if I'm gay. I've explained to everyone that's asked that I'm really not gay.

Actually, as soon as Tyson shouted it out, and turned to Mariam and said, "I'm not gay". She replied with, "I never said you were". Why I told her first, I don't know.

Tala looks furious. Kai's appeared from nowhere, and looks amused. Of course, Kai beat Tala up when he found out what Tala did to me, so Kai would find this all amusing. Uh oh, Tala's coming over.

"Look! Tala's going to Max for another go!" someone shouted.

Tala glared at them, and stopped when he got to our table.

"Did you want to shout that any louder, Tyson?" he said.

"Don't know if I could. I'll have to get a microphone next time," Tyson grinned. He really was asking for it.

"You're such a dickhead," Tala spat.

Ooooh dear, this was going to turn nasty. So, what do you do in this sort of situations?

Well, I get up on tables, and announce to everyone that I'm not gay, and Tala was just lonely. And then I shout to the dinner ladies to put the song 'Prince Charming' on, and I start a mass dance.

Of course, Tala has stormed off, with fellow Blitzkrieg Boyz in tow. But the rest of us in the canteen are having a fab time dancing to 'Prince Charming'. Even the dinner ladies.

Practice Matches

3.10 in the pm

After the whole 'Prince Charming' fandango, in which some of the teachers joined in before McFahrt put her foot down, we were all marched off to the training rooms. Which is where we are now. Practicing.

A minute later

Well, we would be practicing. If Ray and Mariah hadn't gotten up to the main dish. Not to beyblade, either.

"Well, erm… Me and 'Riah need to tell you guys something," Ray began. Oh God, it doesn't sound good.

"Well, we're actually leaving to go back home… And erm… We're not going to beyblade anymore, because, erm…" Ray carried on.

Christ, if he takes any longer, I'll be growing a beard.

"Well, the reason being… Is that we're actually trying for a baby," Ray finished.

"YOU'RE WHAT?!" Tyson shouted out.

Well, I can officially say I did not expect Ray and Mariah to announce that.

A minute later

Damn, they're trying for a baby? This is not as such sinking into my pea-sized brain.

A/N: PKW would like to say that she is in no way encouraging teenage pregnancies. Also, I hadn't planned for this chapter to be so long. I also hadn't planned for the whole 'horn, noise and naked' thing to be in here. It was just written in a moment of pure randomosity.

Also, I have read the new Georgia Nicolson book. It is called 'Stop In The Name Of Pants!'. It's very good, but I did nearly cry. I have also seen the trailer for the film they've made of "Angus, Thongs And Full-Frontal Snogging". I've seen a few trailers, in fact. It looks good, but not as good as it's been written in the books. It's out on the 25th of July (obviously), so I'll be going to see that XD

Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this chapter, and remember that a review is almost as good as a hamster called Bibbet :D Cheers!