Seppen: Ello and welcome back from wherever you were.
Xemnas: Hopefully in their respective worlds where they will not bother me…
Seppen: Love you too Xemnas…
Xemnas: I do not feel, let alone love.
Seppen: Kill joy, anyway, KpCw glad you liked Demyx's chapter, I feel I must now advise not to drink anything while you read in case such a thing were to happen again.
Xemnas: I didn't find Demyx's chapter the least bit amusing…
Seppen: because you don't have a heart, I get it!
Xemnas: …
Seppen: I would like to point out for no particular reason that Celiac is a real disease, but is not at all how I described it. Blah blah blah, now back on track I hope you all enjoy this chapter as I did a heck of a whole lot of research in regards to annoying Luxord.
Xemnas: Seppen owns herself and Xaria owns herself and thank Kingdome Hearts neither one of them owns Kingdom Hearts!
Seppen: I resent that. The disclaimer will continue at the end, just don't want to give anything away of course. Oh, and your "best friend" will be found at the bottom when you find yourself like Xaria, you will know what I mean shortly.
Luxord sat at comfortably on the couch, shuffle his deck of cards every so often. Luxord looked over at Xaldin, giving him a want-to-play look. Xaldin looked uninterested as he turned back to read one of the random books lying around the castle.
"Ello Luxord!" Xaria hollered, giving her rendition of a British accent and failing miserably.
"Xaria you're going to have to try pretty hard to annoy me with your mockery." Luxord smirked, shuffling his deck once again.
"Oh I know Luxord, that's why I have my secret weapon," Xaria grinned evilly.
"Good luck with that," Luxord remarked.
"Don't you mean the Best of British?" Seppen asked with a spot-on British accent as she entered the grey room.
"Not bad." Luxord agreed, only mildly impressed.
"I don't mean to be a red rag to a bull, chap, but I know a thing or too." Seppen grinned, relaxing on a chair as she prepared herself for a fun little chat with Luxord.
"You sound quiet mad for this, but I will be making you into a bit of mincemeat," Luxord taunted.
"I'm pretty jammy, so don't go off having a benny when you find yourself gobsmacked."
"Don't get your knickers in a twist and ark at ee when I teach you a thing or two." Luxord shot back with ease.
"Rubbish, bugger, you're off you're trolley if you believe that. I don't give a toss about how good you think you are. You certainly aren't the bees' knees." Seppen smirked, summoning Luxord's cards as she started to shuffle them.
"What the hell are you two saying?" Xaria cried as she stared at the two.
"Xaria, you seem a bit cheesed off so please keep your hair on," Seppen remarked.
"That would be spiffing, we don't need you throwing a wobbly," Luxord chuckled.
"I would be chuffed to bits, go watch the tellie if you're so confused." Seppen suggested, pointing back to Xaria's room.
"I have no idea what you're saying! I'm going to go watch some TV." Xaria moaned as she clutched her aching head.
"Der, she missed that by a mile." Seppen said; face palming as Xaria walked off.
"Are you cream crackered yet, pratt child?" Luxord asked, waiting for Seppen to surrender in defeat.
"Bloke, you're as mad as a hatter if you think I'm done. I'll have you by the short and curlies by the end of the day," Seppen grinned.
"Bloody Nora, I can't believe this bollocks." Luxord moaned as this became tiresome for him.
"My vocabulary is gert macky. So yer tiz, I'm mad as a bag of ferrets and one mad aleck and I'm pleased as punch to do this all day. I may sound dodgy, but I know my Brit lingo, bloke." Seppen rose from her chair in a single motion.
With a simple salute, Seppen turned around and walked off, utterly confusing Luxord as she disappeared.
"That was quiet a corrr." Luxord muttered to himself.
Rain suddenly began hitting the glass of the grey room at an alarming rate. Xaldin instinctively left the room for one with less glass. Luxord, however, moved closer to the window, surprised by the sheer force.
"It's raining cats and dogs out there." Luxord thought as thunder crackled in the distance.
For whatever reason, the storm gave Luxord the idea to time skip into the next day to avoid further annoyance. Without hesitation, Luxord did just that and soon disappeared through time.
~~Another Time~~
Luxord found himself standing in the same place as before, but at a noticeably different time. In fact, everything in the grey room seemed different. The couches were ripped to shreds, the windows smashed to bits and the floor covered in scratches and burn marks. As his eyes traveled to the sky, Luxord found that Kingdom Hearts was gone and that only the stars were lighting the room where he now stood. From behind, a growl sounded and Luxord turned to find a very large cat staring back at him. The cat's eyes glowed orange and its body flexed as it moved towards Luxord. A second glance revealed that the feline standing before Luxord was a saber tooth tiger.
"Nice kitty." Luxord whispered, backing away slowly towards the hallway.
With one last back glance, Luxord took off down the hall. Back in the grey room, the cat sat licking its paws, a patch of black fabric between its claws.
Luxord kept running until he came to his room, which he bolted into and locked the door before the cat could follow him. Panting, Luxord leaned against the door as he examined his room. Just like the grey room, his room was in utter disarray. His bed was in pieces and one large hole had been burned in the center of his bed as if something had shot it.
"Bloody hell, what happened here?" Luxord breathed.
A red flash filled the room briefly as a form moved out from under a pile of garbage.
"Unidentified life form found." The form said robotically.
"I don't like where this is going." Luxord muttered as his hand slowly turned the lock in the door.
"Exterminate life form." The robot cried as its hand shot out at Luxord.
"That's my cue!" Luxord shouted as he raced, yet again, down the hall.
Luxord turned his head back at the mechanical form as he raced back into the grey room. Before he could stop himself, Luxord tripped over the saber tooth tiger and somersaulted into a wall. Managing to scoot into a corner, Luxord watched as the tiger and robot came towards him. Luxord shut his eyes, waiting for the worse, when a sudden gust of wind picked up. Opening his eyes slowly, Luxord looked to find a tornado forming outside, moving closer towards the grey room.
"I'm gonna die!" Luxord cried to no one in particular.
The tornado shifted its shape as it came into the room and somehow managed to pick the tiger up before some unknown attraction took it back outside. The robot seemed disinterested in the tiger's fate as it moved towards Luxord again. As if crossing some invisible barrier, the sky turned bright red as large meteors flew into the grey room, burning holes everywhere and even managing to nail the robot in the head.
"Well, that solves that problem, but what about everything else?" Luxord remarked, hoping for another miracle.
As if in reply, hail began to fall from the sky. A large piece, slightly larger than a golf ball, flew through a meteor hole and struck Luxord in the forehead, knocking him unconscious.
~~Normal Time~~
"I think he's waking up." Xaria said as Seppen continued to poke Luxord with her stick.
"Stop that." Luxord groaned as he rubbed his head, feeling a lump on his head.
"Oh good, you're awake." Seppen smirked her accent still noticeable as her stick suddenly disappeared.
"What happened?" Luxord asked, not believing what he had seen.
"Oh, you know, Seppen knocked you upside the head with her stick and Zexion put you under an illusion." Demyx went on.
"Nii-san!' Seppen shouted as she thumped the back of his head.
Luxord narrowed his eyes at Seppen and Zexion as he rose from the ground.
"So everything is okay, including Kingdom Hearts?" Luxord asked, rubbing his head.
"Go see for yourself." Zexion suggested, hiding a smirk.
Luxord walked over to the window, not even a single drop of water present as he looked up at Kingdom Hearts.
"Xemnas would have a cow if something happened to…" Luxord paused as he realized there was writing on Kingdom Hearts, "the game? Bloody hell, I lost the game."
"Dang it, Luxord, I lost the game." Xaria cried as several echoes filled the castle as the rest of the organization 'lost the game'.
"Oh, nice one, Zexion." Seppen congratulated as she gave him a high-five.
"Seppen, Axel needs more cards, he is almost done." Roxas hollered as he came running down the hallway.
"On it," Seppen replied as she summoned Luxord's cards and ran to Axel's room with Roxas.
"What is Axel up to?" Luxord asked Zexion.
"No idea." Zexion shrugged as he pulled out a book and started to read.
Luxord ran after Seppen, Xaria behind him as they raced to find out what Axel was up to. As the two reached Axel's room, they found an enormous castle made of cards. Axel, who now stood on a ladder, took the cards from Seppen and added them to the top with a careful hand. After placing the last card on top, Axel slid down the ladder and stood back to admire his work.
"Now for the finishing touches," Axel grinned as he snapped his fingers, lighting the cards on fire.
"My cards!" Luxord shouted after realizing Axel had just lit his precious cards on fire.
"There is nothing like burning something to put you in a good mood." Axel smirked as he admired his work, "Got it memorized?"
"Axel, stop saying that!" Xaria shouted, annoyed with Axel's signature catch phrase.
Due to Xaria's sudden outburst, the stack of cards began to sway and then began to collapse as their foundation was destroyed.
"Hit the deck!" Seppen shouted as they dove out of the room.
"That was a really bad pun, Seppen." Axel laughed as he tried to take control of the fire, unable due to the cards moving so much.
Seppen face-palmed just as Demyx came running down the hall towards them.
"Wow, that doesn't look good!" Demyx remarked, summoning his sitar before dousing the fire with water.
"And now my room is soaked." Axel moaned as he stepped in a puddle of water, almost tripping.
"My precious cards!" Luxord cried after having been in shock.
"Don't worry, bloke, I gave Axel a mock set of cards so yours are fine." Seppen grinned as she picked up one of the fake cards.
Luxord narrowed his eyes at Seppen, malice radiating off of his form.
"Oh, before I forget!" Demyx said as he turned to Luxord, "What time is it?"
"How should I bloody know?" Luxord asked annoyance in his voice.
"Well, you do control time, so you ought to know." Demyx explained, his logic actually almost making sense for once, "Besides, I tried to use the sun dial I found in Vexen's lab, but it doesn't work."
"Of course it doesn't bloody work, we don't have a bloody sun." Luxord grumbled.
"Yeah we do, but it won't sit still." Demyx went on as he tugged Luxord back to the grey room.
Everyone else followed close behind the sitarist as they all found a new shape hanging in the sky.
"What the hell, since when did Kingdom Hearts have a buddy in the sky?" Xaria asked as she stared at the fiery hot orb that seemed to dance across the sky.
"I have no idea, but I would prefer it not to move like that." Seppen moaned as the "sun" circled the sky in random patterns.
Without warning, Seppen fell backwards, Axel barely catching her as she passed out.
"Seppen never really liked things that spun, always made her dizzy." Xaria remarked as her unconscious friend.
"And we have no stick to poke her with," Demyx pouted.
A loud thud filled the room as they all turned to find Luxord unconscious on the floor.
"Looks like Luxord doesn't like being dizzy either." Roxas muttered as he watched the "sun" dance a little more.
As suddenly as she had passed out, Seppen rose and pulled out her stick before poking the heck out of Luxord.
"You have issues." Zexion muttered under his breath as he glanced at Seppen.
"Says the 'emo'." Seppen smirked, noting the annoyance that filled Zexion's eyes.
The "sun" suddenly stopped dancing and seemed to disappear as Luxord came to. With a slight moan, Luxord rubbed his head as he sat up.
"Not another illusion." Luxord moaned as he continued to rub his sore head.
"I have nothing to do with this one." Zexion replied, flipping the pages in his book.
"Then how did? Who did?" Luxord stuttered as he looked at everyone in the room.
Just as Luxord was on the verge of passing out, some strange noises filled the room as someone came down the hall. Saїx entered the grey room, carrying a shorter form by the back of their cloak. Without little care, Saїx dropped the cloaked figure in front of Seppen.
"I believe this is affiliated with you." Saїx growled as he stared menacingly at the form.
Seppen quickly grabbed the form before it could race after Saїx to get in another fight.
"Who is that?" Demyx asked as he turned his head to the side.
"I told you not to fight with Saїx." Seppen chastised the figure, unable to hide a devious smirk.
"Not my fault the guy naturally ticks me off, we are opposites after all." The form remarked, staring down the hall as if Saїx would change his mind and come back for a fight.
"Oh yeah," Seppen said, realizing she had yet to introduce her friend, "This is Axav, she was the one controlling the 'sun'."
The form pulled off her hood, revealing her long light brown hair and snake-like brown eyes. As if to show off, she summoned her double-edged scythe and spun it around expertly in the air.
"Her again?" Axel remarked, remember Axav when she had freaked him out before.
"Now don't you go start and get yourself into a fight with her," Seppen laughed.
"Not another one." Luxord thought to himself.
"Well, I have one last thing to say to you, Luxord." Seppen grinned mischievously at Luxord.
"And what might that be?" Luxord asked while the other slowly slipped away.
"Card games on Motorcycles!" Seppen shouted before disappearing.
AN:
Seppen: As a continuation, I don't own an references or allusions such as cards games on motorcycles which is a reference to something on Youtube related to Yu Gi Oh. I also don't own the wonderful ideas I received from godly345 and Shxlyna and I especially do not own Axav who belongs to godly345.
Axel: Got it memorized?
Seppen: Thank you Axel…
Xaria: AXEL!
Seppen: Well, considering I was restraining Axel from saying that for this long, I have to let him get it out of his system at some point!
Xemnas: Are you done yet?
Seppen: Hmm… disclaimer check… fantasy moment in the story check… and ticking of Xaria priceless.
Xemnas: …
Seppen: Don't judge me!
Axel: Don't forget to review! Got is memorized?
Xaria: Axel!
Seppen: Bye bye!
Mad as a hatter : Off your trolley : Mad as a bag of ferrets - crazy
you're the bees knees - cool
Red rag to a bull - bragging
Ark at ee - Listen to him or her
pratt - annoying
Bloody Nora : Bloody hell - Dang it
Yer tiz - Here it is
Best of British - Good luck
bugger - Annoying person
bloke : chap - dude
bollocks : rubbish - garbage
By the short and curlies - In a bind
Cheesed off - annoyed
Chuffed to bits : Pleased as punch - pleased
corrr - surprise
knackered : Cream crackered - tired
Having a benny : Throw a wobbly - tantrum
der - duh
dodgy - untrustworthy
Gert macky - huge
gobsmacked - Loss of words
I don't give a toss - Don't care
jammy - lucky
keep your hair on - Don't get your knickers in a twist - Calm down
Raining cats and dogs - Raining hard
spiffing - wonderful
Mad aleck - Hyper child
Mad for it - enthusiastic
Make mincemeat out of someone - fight
Tellie - tv