He sighed aloud and then chuckled to himself thinking how close that had been. Obviously a little too close for the Commander as well, if she got so nervous about a little shipboard gossip. Who was she trying to kid anyways? Like Joker hadn't been observing their little interlude by the lockers. Right out in plain sight of the cameras and everything. He felt bad for stopping them, but then again they were lucky to have him or both could have been drummed out the service. When Alliance investigators had come around reviewing footage for their inquiry into Shepard's recent actions, he had quickly done a little splicing to ensure it looked like only a conversation had taken place. Being good at hacking extranet security blocks had paid off in more ways than one. Still they could have made his job much harder if they had actually started macking, like he was sure they had wanted to. Though neither would ever, ever admit it to him afterwards when he tried to tease them.

Both had been dancing around the issue of a 'relationship' for months. Both the commander and the lieutenant were too attached to the Alliance and the regulations. They would never allow themselves to falter when so much else was at stake. But he had hoped that they would allow themselves to be happy. Maybe just because he considered Kaidan to be, well maybe a friend, he wasn't used to those. People often pitied or didn't consider him. Alenko, he both paid attention to him and seemed to tactifully ignore his disability. Joker suspected it had something to do with his own disability. His L2 implant caused more trouble than it was worth in Joker's mind. Biotics were usually mistrusted and avoided. Alenko probably hadn't made many friends in his lifetime either. The immediate attraction between fellow biotic Commander Shepard and his buddy Lieutenant Alenko could be felt throughout the room that Joker happened to be in at the time. After a few missions together they were inseperable. Even on his late shifts he could see them in the cameras sitting and talking. Reviewing battle data and mission information, was not the sexy talk he was looking for, but they were both kind of nerdy. He didn't think Kaidan would ever get the balls to make a real move. Until Ilos. Kaidan had come up to check on their progress, clearly anxious. Joker wasn't sure if it was the whole grand theft spaceship thing or another matter entirely. Kaidan asked a few questions and then proceeded to pace, PACE behind his chair. Could that get anymore annoying? Yes, because he also kept rubbing the back of his neck. The click click of steps and the rub rub of skin on skin was enough to drag information out of any hostage after a few minutes.

"Dude seriously. I don't need another stairwell." Joker finally turned around in his chair.

Alenko paused a moment looking very quizzical.

"This whole pacing a hole in the floor. I thought you might be remodeling or something. Really, do you like, want to talk about it or something." Joker tried to sound sincere but sensed it came out more nervous about carrying on a serious conversation more than anything.

Kaidan apparently didn't notice. He actually flopped down into the second seat and asked, "What do you think about all this, Joker?"

"All this, our plan, stealing the ship and all? Or more all this, what is the purpose of life and shit?" He spread his arms apart for dramatization.

"The purpose of life one. Well more so, this whole we are a smaller part of this big cycle of extinction. And maybe now our number is up."

"I'm not really the philosophical type Alenko. I don't know. I guess it's pretty overwhelming to think what's really out there waiting to get us. But I have some sort of feeling it's all going to work out alright in the end."

The surprised look on Alenko's face matched the tone in his voice, "A feeling? Like faith?"

"Uh, I don't know about that. If that's what it is maybe. But I trust Shepard to look out for us, you know. She's not one to let people down." Joker tilted his head judging Alenko's reactions. He stiffened a bit at Shepard's name and looked off into the distance.

"No she isn't. Do you think anyone's ever let her down Joker?"

"Hard to say. She's always got it together. Always doing the right thing. Hell, if I didn't know any better I'd say she's been replaced by some evil double her pulling a stunt like this. But who's to say what goes on inside her head. I certainly don't know. Do you?" He hoped that Alenko would be so distracted with his thoughts he would just answer that last question without thinking it through. It would certainly help him out with his bet. Was it all just a battlefield flirting or were the Commander and the Lieutenant genuinely, irrecoverably in love?

"There are times when she let's me in. I wish there were more." YES! Oh, man he was totally going to win so many credits over that bit of info. He was one of the only ones to say it was love. All the other crew saw it is nothing serious. He knew better. He knew both Alenko and the Commander better, they didn't mess around with anything less than serious.

Okay, but his friend looked really forlorn now. Too bad he couldn't share his bit of good news with Kaidan. It probably wouldn't really cheer him up. So instead he turned the question back on him.

"Well, do you ever let her in?"

Kaidan Alenko's eyes snapped to Joker's face as if coming out of a trance.

"What did you ask?"

"You said you wish she would let you in more. I'm just asking if you have ever let her in. I mean coming from me, you're a pretty hard nut to crack Alenko. I doubt you make it easy on her."

His eyebrow twitched upward before smiling, "Joker, that's pretty wise for someone who's closest relationship is his control panel."

"Oh well. I only give out sage advice once a year. You've found the day. Congratulations."

"I think I need to go... do... something." Alenko stood up.

Then strode towards the stairs with a purpose in his step.

Joker wanted to call out 'Go get her tiger' but realized indiscretion was probably better in this instance.

Plus, who was to say Alenko would actually pull the trigger. He probably just wanted to go have a talk with her. Tell her how much he respected her or some other such nonsense that he felt he needed to say.

All his doubts were cleared about six hours later when Alenko got very protective enroute. Granted that landing was pretty nerve racking; but cool, calm Kaidan wasn't one to disagree with fellow officers quite so… loudly. Which told Joker even louder that Kaidan Alenko had broken regs with the Commander.

And had probably liked it.

And probably wanted to do it again. Which was why he didn't want her getting killed in something so silly as a Mako drop zone error.

No worries Joker had saved the day. They had even left him behind by going through the conduit… didn't see that one coming. But again he saved the day by contacting the fleet and leading the charge. Awesome moment. Epic even. That whole nose dive and firing at Sovereign. He had won several of his exams by combining acrobatics with combat, the enemy never knew what to make of it. Especially the Turians in the simulators at the Academy.

They had all pulled through it to carry on once more. Which meant back to duty. Which meant back to the Commander and Kaidan keeping the regs.

Aww man. As his panel beeped with the Commander's decision on their final destination, he started plotting his first jump.

Only to let the man live once and then cut him off. Ouch. Lieutenant Alenko was going to be ornery until their next shore leave.

Joker hoped for his sake, and maybe a little of theirs, that would come sooner rather than later… as he punched the dock release.