I'm so proud of all of you. –sniffs- You've given me 111 reviews. Thank you, you are totally awesome. This next chapter is for my friend Andy Lewis, and I hope he like it and laughs with me and at Mike Newton. I made it extra long for you! If you want detail…then use you're imagination! I love every one of you! xoxo Popular Galinda!

'I wish Mike was so openly dumb in the books or movie... but that is the beauty of fan fic.' – DesElements

Dear Diary

My boyfriend is a vampire. He can run abnormally fast, read minds, attack animals in the forest to eat and has really cold skin. And he is so beautiful. I love him so much and I never want to let him go.

He has not alone shown his side of the world, but saved me from another vampire called James who video taped me whilst I almost died. But I was saved. I wanted to turn into a vampire and be with my Edward but he said no and told me to wait. Meaning it will be a long time until I am a vampire again.

But today, Edward gave me two presents! He gave true love and Mike Newton's diary. Yes, Mike Newton's diary. It's filled with all this information about me and how I'll be his future wife some day. And I can't believe that he thought having a stinky wife would be embarrassing! I don't smell that much…do I?

Well I read through it with Edward and we laughed and laughed the whole night. He read to me in his adorable British accent. My 107-year-old vampire boyfriend has the sexiest voice in the world. I can't help but love him forever and ever. Soon I'll be a vampire and we'll live forever. Well until someone burns us.

Love Bella

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Dear Piece of Scrap Paper

SOMEONE HAS STOLEN MY DIARY! I MEAN LOG!

I bet it was Cullen. Stupid Cullen with that British accent, beautiful face and seeing dead people. I bet if I could see dead people I would be the coolest kid in school. I would reunite people with their families who have died long ago.

Seeing dead people is kind of weird and disgusting and can also really gross people out easily. Like that poor kid in that movie where he has a sixth sense and can see dead people walking around. His sixth sense scares the crap out of him and this doctor tries to work out the sixth sense his has. I think its called 'The Boy Who Could See Dead People with Donkeys'…something like that. (A/N: The film is called Sixth Sense if some of you didn't know that)

Alright piece of scrap paper, today after I discovered my log went missing from my locker I went up to Cullen and shoved him with my hand. It didn't work because Cullen looked as though I didn't touch him and it really hurt my hand afterwards. So I said to Cullen.

"Oi, Cullen!" That was when I hurt my hand. "You stole something of mine."

"You mean that stupid diary of yours?" Cullen laughed along with his stupid brothers that aren't really his brothers but pretend they are.

"My log." I corrected him.

"Why would I want it? It has nothing to do with me." Cullen told me.

"Cause, Cullen you stole my log because you see DEAD DONKEYS!" I shouted at him.

"What?"

"Cullen sees dead donkeys!" I shouted and walked away from him. I told him off.

He knows that his secret is out now. HAHAHA! Now Bella will know the truth about Cullen and she'll dump him and come to me! I'll have her again with that beautiful pillow hair of hers! MWA HAHAAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAA!

So, piece of scrap paper, I must fold up many times and then rip tiny pieces from you. Then I would roll your scraps into a ball and then throw you in the bin. And then I'll eat a banana and throw the skin onto of you so no one will ever see this. But first…I have to get a banana.

From Mike Newton, sexiest man at Forks High according to Jessica Stanely