A/N: Yeah, its late, but nearly 5K words long. Am I forgiven? Read on, you might forgive me after you're finished. ;)
Chapter Ten- In Awkward Situations
.
.
.
.
~SWY~
Apparently toilet paper is a necessity. Who knew? Somehow I've managed to use every single square of the stuff in my apartment. The thought of being forced to resort to using paper towels has me wandering the aisles of Target pushing a basket with the biggest package of TP I can buy without going to one of those bulk warehouses. I think thirty-six rolls should last me for a while.
It seems silly to go to a Super Target for just one item, so I figure I may as well pick up a few other things I need while I'm here. The problem with Target, though, is that the longer you spend in there the more things you find that you need. So far I've realized that I need all four seasons of The Big Bang Theory on DVD. I've also managed to add a battery-operated fan that sprays water, not to mention a picture frame (that I don't have a picture for), candles shaped like hedgehogs, a frog keychain that's a laser light, and a plastic bowl with stars and stripes on it that I found on the clearance aisle. It's a good thing I ran out of toilet paper or I would have never known what I was missing out on.
A programmable coffee maker has my complete attention as the box exclaims all the wondrous things this little appliance can do, and I'm just about to fall for the propaganda and add it to the other crap in my cart when I hear, "Edward? Edward Cullen, is that you?" I turn to see who has recognized me and look into the last pair of eyes I thought I'd see today and dump the coffee maker in my basket.
Bella Swan.
I stare at her for a moment, not entirely sure she isn't a figment of my imagination. That's an entirely plausible explanation, because the woman standing before me is... a vision. Okay, even just thinking that sounds stupid. But she is. The long, tan legs I remember seem longer and darker in the cutoff denim shorts she's wearing, and the white, flowy top she has on is see-through. It gives her an ethereal, otherworldly look; and it would be sinfully indecent except for the white bikini top she has on under it. Her beautiful hair is shorter than I remember it, but it's still long enough for her to pull back into that ponytail I remember so well. My fingers itch to reach out and give it a teasing tug like I used to.
"Holy cow! It is you!" The vision interrupts my musings. "I thought that was you I saw, but I only caught a glimpse of you as I was flying past. But I'd know you anywhere." She sets down the red basket, freeing up her hands to reach out and pull me to her. The scent of sunscreen and salt overwhelm me. She's clearly just come from the beach, and the realization has me reeling. "How are you?" she asks as she steps back. The absence of her in my personal space makes me aware that I've yet to acknowledge her in any way.
"Bella! Wow, it's been so long! You're the last person I expected to see here," I fumble. "Not that you shouldn't be here... it's just that I didn't expect to see you. I said that already, didn't I?" I pause for a moment to dislodge my foot from my mouth. She's smiling at me in that way I know means she's laughing at me, not with me. And it doesn't bother me a bit; it probably should, but it doesn't.
"Yes, you did, but that's okay. I guess we were bound to bump into each other at some point; Jax Beach isn't that big."
"Nope, still the same old crusty beach town," I agree. I attempt to make polite conversation as I stand gaping at the girl, well woman, who might possibly forever be known as "the one who got away." There's a million thoughts in my head, overlapping one another, creating a sort of white noise in the back of my mind. But my focus is on her; it's like I see her in high definition, and I try to absorb as many details I can to reflect on later.
"How are you?" she asks politely.
"I'm good. How have you been?"
"Good, I've been good." I wonder if this could be anymore awkward. "It's good to be back."
"I'd heard you were back in town," I admit.
"You did, huh? Good to know the Old Biddies Gossip and Yammer Network is still in working order." Her laugh. I think I could die happy if that was the last sound I heard before slipping into oblivion. I can feel the tension start to lift.
"Sure is, and Emmett is still the proud president of the OBGYN's." I smile and force myself to watch the joy play across her face as she laughs again. Even though it's very near painful to do so. Good lord, how I've missed that sound, and I had no idea just how much until just now.
"You look good, Cullen," she states after a moment of awkward silence. I look down at myself, hoping to see what she sees. "You've really filled that uniform out since the last time I saw you in it." Her inflection suggests she's teasing, but I can tell she means it by the way she's looking at me. I've been check out before, and Bella Swan is clearly checking me out.
I smile at her, amused that she seems to like what she sees. "You too, Swan. I hear you've been swimming with the fishes. Training them to jump through hoops and all." Each moment I'm with her I remember how much I've missed this- us.
"Not true!" Bella gasps. "The OBGYN's have their Intel wrong. I'm a Marine Mammalogist, Edward," she tries to inform me with a straight face, but I imagine "mammalogist" isn't an easy word to say in all seriousness. "I study marine mammal life, specifically dolphins. The only fish I handle are the ones we feed to the dolphins. And I do not train them to jump through hoops. If any of us are trained it's the scientists. Especially those of us working on our doctorates." I can't stop staring at how her eyes sparkle in the harsh, fluorescent lighting. The woman has always been able to capture my attention without even trying. I already knew she was a scientist thanks to my connections at the OBGYN. It was one of the things I admired most about her- not the fact that she was a successful woman in a male-dominated field- no, what I admired is that she had always said she wanted to be a Marine Biologist and she'd done it. She'd gone to school, worked her ass off, and earned the respect of colleagues twice her age. Bella had achieved her dreams, and that was all I had ever wanted for her. Of course, I had once hoped to be a part of those dreams, but the highway of life has a way of squashing hopes like a swarm of love bugs on Interstate 95.
"Good for you, Bella. I always knew you'd do it. Congratulations," I sincerely offered.
"Thanks, Edward, but I haven't earned it yet. Still have a dissertation to finish up, but the end is in sight, thank goodness." The relief in her voice is clear. "Hey," she changes the subject, "I hear you're some big shot in the army?" She sounds proud, or at least impressed.
"You must have gotten your faulty information from the same source I did, 'cause I'm not a big shot anything." I laugh off the awkward feeling of satisfaction that I had done something that made her proud of me. "I just do what I'm told to do, ma'am." I mock salute her and she rewards my silliness with another soft laugh.
"I like the way that sounds. I bet the ladies eat it up, huh?"
"That's classified information, ma'am," I dodge having to acknowledge her insinuation, because if I answer her I risk looking like the total asshat I am when I admit that there aren't any "ladies." Well, there's Tanya, but we just met, and I'm not sure she even counts. There was only the one date so far, after all.
"I bet it is," she grins at me like she knows something I don't.
A kid a few aisles over is screaming about how he wants applesauce. I know the brat wants applesauce because he keeps chanting it over and over, getting louder with each round. "I. Want. Apple. Sauce. I. Want. Apple. Sauce. I. WANT. APPLE. SAUCE!" I swear if that lady doesn't give the kid some fucking applesauce I'm going to go apeshit right here in aisle sixteen.
"Well, it was good seeing you, Edward." She bends down to retrieve her basket. I hope she isn't going because she thinks I'm annoyed with her. I almost tell her that the kid was tap dancing on my last nerve so she'll change her mind and stick around and chat a little longer, but the overhead lights glint off a bracelet she's wearing. It's easy to tell the bracelet isn't cheap, and hanging from it are several charms. Most noticeable are a heart-shaped, diamond-esque stone that looks like it belongs in a museum somewhere and a dolphin covered in tons of tiny blue-green stones. Next to the dolphin is a charm that spells out "I (heart) you". I bet her boyfriend gave her the bracelet. Her very rich boyfriend. I decide to let her have her out.
"You too, Bella." My response sounds dry and lame. "See ya around."
"Yeah, see you. Bye."
I watch her turn and leave and think that's the second time she's left me, but only the first time I've watched her go. I decide I'm finished shopping and head for the front of the store to pay for my toilet paper and other crap. Maybe Em or Jas can meet up for beers at Shaunacey's later. I see her leaving through the automatic doors as I wait to check out and resolve to make the date with Jasper and the girls the best it can possibly be. The guys are right, it's time to move on and leave Bella Swan in the past.
.
.
~SWY~
.
Jasper suggested we have dinner at this restaurant in Jax Beach that was getting rave reviews. It was on the water right next to the pier and was known for not only the amazing food, but every seat was guaranteed to have a perfect view of the ocean. Sadly, the owners seemed to lack creativity when it came to naming their establishment and went with "The Pier." It was just one dinner; as long as I didn't get food poisoning then I'd consider the evening a success.
The plan was to meet the ladies at The Pier. I'd been hounding Jas for details about this woman, but it didn't take long to realize that he had no clue who she was. The only info he had on her was that Hawk assured him that my date was a knockout and that, like me, she was a local. Both Jas and Hawk were transplants from other areas; Nicole was from Crescent City, and Jasper decided to move to Florida after returning from our tour in the Sandbox. So, to two non-natives, the idea of both of us being from the same town and never having met before seemed romantic. Whatever.
When we arrive, the hostess informs us the girls are already seated. We climb a winding metal staircase that looks like it belongs in a lighthouse to the second floor. Dark-stained wood covers the floor and table tops. To the left is the bar; I make note of its location for future reference. I have a feeling I'm going to be throwing quite a few drinks back just to make it through the night. In front of us is a wall of plate-glass; beyond that, the beach. The sky is growing dark, but the beach is bathed in the warm tones of the setting sun. Tiki torches light a path through the dunes to the shore. It looks like something from a postcard.
A waiter is going from table to table lighting candles. We're led to our table where two women are already sitting with drinks. Hawk- er, Nicole sees us and waves us over. I can't see who is sitting with her, but I will soon enough. We walk up to the table and my stomach feels like there's a stampede of bison running rampant through it.
Breathe in through your nose and out through your mouth, Cullen. You've taken down entire squadrons of armed men; you can handle one short dinner.
The lamest pep talk in the history of pep talks fails to do its job. Big surprise there. I'm either about to puke or belch like a Simpsons character. Both would be embarrassing and make me look like an ass. Jas has no clue that I'm about to blow like Mount Vesuvius and is enraptured by Hawk. I look around for the nearest bathroom, and spot it not far from us next to the bar. Excellent, I can puke in private and grab some liquid fortification in the same trip. I turn to head to the can when Nicole notices I'm standing three feet away from her and calls, "Hey! I'm glad you could make it," and gestures to a seat at the round table. My brilliant plan of escape is thwarted, something that would never have happened if I had minions. I'm scared to death I'm gonna toss my cookies everywhere, so I focus on the high gloss of the table. Resigned to my fate, I move to where she's showing me I should sit as she begins the introductions.
"Jasper, this is my friend that I've been telling you about."
I hear Jas exchanging pleasantries. "Nice to meet you-"
"Isabella, but everyone just calls me Bella." My head jerks up at the sound of her voice. My stomach lurches, but I manage to not empty its contents all over the dining room.
It's her. My Bella.
I can't feel my feet or my tongue. Actually, I realize after a quick roll call that I can't feel anything. I'm standing next to the table staring at her with my mouth hanging open and my eyes bugging out of my head like a cartoon character. Jas is shaking her hand, but she's looking past him at me. She looks equally shocked.
"This is my buddy, Edward Cullen. He's an ass, but he's promised to be on his best behavior," Jas assures and releases her. My breath catches in my chest when she reaches for me.
"It's so nice to meet you, Edward. I wish I could say I've heard many wonderful things about you, but unfortunately, my friend here didn't want me to form any preconceived opinions of you. So, apart from your name, the only thing I know about you is what your comrade has just informed me of. Namely, that you're an ass." She manages the entire speech with a straight face. Meanwhile, I'm still staring and pumping her hand like I expect water to start pouring from her nose.
After a few uncomfortable moments of staring and pumping, Whitlock elbows me in the ribs, "You gonna say anything, Cullen? What's the matter? Cat got your tongue?"
"More like the swan," I murmur.
"What's that?"
"Uh, nothing, man." I try to shake off the shock. I dropped her hand and tried to sit in my chair without falling on the floor. I manage, but just barely. "Nice to meet you, Isabella."
"Bella. Call me Bella, please." I smile at her request. I lost count years ago how many times I had heard her say those exact words when meeting someone new. She hated her full name; said only princesses and prissy dogs were named Isabella.
"Bella, that's a nice name. Means, 'beautiful', right?" I'd heard that numerous times, as well.
"Yeah, it does. Nice to meet you, Edward." I'm not sure what game she's playing, but I decide to play along as long as I can. Suddenly the night is looking more promising.
Jasper sits down across from me so that Bella's on my right and Nicole is on my left. I can't take my eyes off her. Bella, not Nicole, I couldn't care less that Hawk, or Jas for that matter, are at the same table. Bella is sitting next to me, and I'm not entirely sure how to handle it. Do I continue to pretend that I don't know her or give in to what I really want to do? An image flashes of me swiping the table clear of flatware and glasses and taking Bella on it as our friends gape.
"I've heard of lust at first sight, but this is ridiculous," Jas grumbles. For a second I think he's referring to the fantasy now playing in my head with great detail, but turns out he's just talking about the look I'm giving Bella.
It takes some work, but I tone down my lustful thoughts and manage my most innocent grin. It's not much. Believe me. "Aw, Jas! Are you sad that I don't look at you like that anymore? I thought we were past all of this jealousy."
"Shut up, you enjoyed that night in the desert as much as I did."
"Yeah, it was a real treat to be snuggled up to you in near freezing temperatures while wild things circled around us. They should really rename that place Disney World."
"Right? There was some scary shit out there in the desert at night," Jas agrees.
"Oh, stop your whining, both of you," Nicole chides. "You were on a base, with actual beds and roofs over your heads and a twenty foot high, razor wire topped fence with electrical current flowing through it. You make it sound like you were wrestling poisonous snakes and braving hypothermia." I like Hawk, don't get me wrong, but she can be a bitch when she wants to be, and it seems like that's her favorite pastime these days.
"Like you would know. The only place you've ever been deployed was Kansas," I teased her. "You have no idea what we had to brave and wrestle." I jabbed her with my elbow and grinned. Nicole is a good soldier and usually a decent person to hang around, but something had been bothering her lately. It was obvious to everyone, but no one knew exactly what it was that had her snapping at anyone and everyone. Maybe spending time with Jas would pull her out of her funk.
"If by wild things you're referring to donkeys and hedgehogs, then yeah, I'm sure your tour in Afghanistan was harrowing, indeed." The smirk on her face and the chuckle that came from the woman to my right told me that Jas had been sharing stories with Hawk from our deployment.
"You told her, didn't you?" I accused. Both of them cracked up laughing.
"Told her what?" Bella asks.
"About the nickname I earned while in the sandbox." The two conspirators are laughing openly now.
"Oh, I think this is a story I want to hear."
"No. It is not," I correct.
"Yes it is."
"Then it isn't a story I care to share. Especially with someone I just met," I reply, placing heavy emphasis on the "just". I decide to try to change the subject. Thankfully, the waitress appears with water and takes our drink and appetizer orders.
"You two seem close," Bella observes gesturing to Jas and me. "I guess serving together does that, huh?"
"No," Jasper snorts, "Showering together does that. Having served together invests us in the other's well being."
"I don't understand."
"Well, after spending twelve months fighting to keep this jackass alive it seems rather counterproductive to kill him now that we're back, no matter how much he annoys the ever-livin' shit out of me."
We all laugh at my expense.
"And you're so easy to get along with, Whitlock."
"Hey, now, give me a chance and I'll show you just how easy I am, Hawk." A collective groan rises from the table.
"I think what the perv was trying to say is that we are indeed close. There's no one else around here that saw the same shit I did. I guess that's reason enough to keep him around. Well, that and he's pretty." I wink at him and he blows me an air kiss.
"Oh, lord," Nicole swears. "I get enough of this bromance shit in the office. Can we just not for the night? I hear the food here is fantastic and I'd hate to lose my appetite over the two of you making kissy faces at each other."
"Jealous," Jas and I taunt her in stereo; it's our usual response to her bitching.
"Bella, what is it you do?" Jas expertly changes the subject.
"I'm a marine biologist." I can't help but notice how she lights up when she says it. I think back to our run-in at the store a few days ago.
"So you study fish?" I know it's wrong to tease her, but it's what we've always done. I'm not about to stop just because these two idiots across from me have no clue how much history is between us. I can't pry my eyes from her. It's like I've been dying for a glimpse of her and now all I want to do is drink in the sight of her.
The appetizers arrive and the conversation pauses for a moment while plates are passed and everyone admires the smell of the dishes in front of us.
"Mostly I study marine mammals. I do work with fish on occasion, but for the most part I'm a mammalogist." Jas is bobbing his head like he understands the distinction, but I can't resist the urge to really antagonize her.
"What's the difference?" I ask flippantly. I very nearly snort.
"The difference," she hisses, "is that the animals I study don't have scales, would never end up in fish dip," she punctuates this point by viciously jamming her cracker into the delicious dip in the center of the table, "and they're all warm-blooded. Which is more than I can say for you." She pops the cracker in her mouth, effectively dismissing me.
Jasper steps in to defuse the situation. Mostly likely scared shitless that I'll ruin his chances of getting laid later. "So you work with dolphins and whales?" He inquires gently.
"Here I do. I did a study in California a few years ago on sea lions that lasted about six months."
"I hear they're nasty animals. Not very nice at all."
"Well, they're named lions for a reason, you know. And they really aren't as bad as people think. The ones I worked with were actually quite friendly, and their pups are so adorable."
"If you say so," Jas concedes.
"I do," Bella chuckles. "Frankly, I'd rather share a cell with an angry sea lion than a content polar bear any day."
"Polar bears are sea mammals?" Nicole waves the waitress over to refresh her water and order another round of drinks.
"Uh-huh, most people don't realize that they spend most of their lives in the water. I'm scared to death of them, but I'd love the chance to study them. Maybe I'll get a chance to next winter."
"Really?" I'm intrigued. Who is this woman sitting next to me? The last time I'd seen her she was young, smart, and ready to take on the world. Now she was stunning, brilliant, and had the world at her fingertips. She amazes me. Then again, she always has.
My fingers casually graze the back of her hand as I reach for my napkin and I hear her quiet gasp at the contact. Electricity shoots through me at the sound, and I grasp the napkin in an effort to keep from running my hand along the entire length of her bare arm to hear what sound she'd make then.
"Yeah," she clears her throat, "I put in to be a member of a research team that's observing four bears throughout their lifecycle. It's intense. I would be taking over for one of the other members while she has her baby." I'm listening to every word she says, but all I can hear is, She's leaving, and it makes something deep within me twist painfully.
"So you would be observing their feeding habits and everything?"
"Yeah, Jas, bears eat just like you and me."
"Let's just hope, for your sake, they don't eat people just like you and me."
"I'll drink to that," Bella raises her drink and we follow her lead. "To not becoming bear chow..."
"Cheers," we all reply.
"Where are you working now?" I ask.
"I'm stationed at Whitney Lab down at Marineland."
"In St. Augustine?"
"Well, actually south of St. Auggie, but yeah."
"I remember going there as a kid. It was like a mini Sea World with dolphin shows and stuff."
"Back in the day that's exactly what it was. Now its a facility dedicated to education and research. I participate in studies and when I'm not logging right whale migration numbers or working on some other project then I work with the dolphins at the facility."
"She has the most fun job ever," Hawk's tone is genuine. It's obvious she and Bella are close. I might have to agree with her; Bella's job sounds awesome.
"What's not to love about spending your days soaking up sun and playing with dolphins all day?" Jasper teases. "They've always reminded me of giant, slimy puppies."
"It is pretty ideal. The biggest drawback would have to be coming home every night reeking of fish, and that my fingers and toes are in a perpetual state of pruniness."
"Dolphins don't go batshit crazy like killer whales can, do they? 'Cause that would just suck to have that happen." I wonder if Jas wasn't dropped on his head as a small child. Who asks something like that?
"Not usually, but they are wild animals and have their moments like any other creature," Bella admits. "Can you imagine having that in your obituary write-up, though?"
We agree it would be a ridiculous and humiliating way to kick the bucket and offer terrible possible headstone inscriptions that leave us laughing and moaning at the absurdity.
We all reach for our drinks at the same time to fill the awkward silence that has filled the void of our dying laughter.
"So, about that nickname..." Damn, she's not gonna let that go.
"What nickname? Someone in the military has a nickname? Imagine that!"
"Oh, come on! I don't want to be the only one at the table left out of the inside joke. Besides, that's rude."
"Well, I'd like to point out that you wouldn't be the only one in the dark if Casper over there could keep his big ole pie hole shut." I narrow my eyes at Jasper and wait for him to protest the nickname he'd been given around the same time.
"Who's Casper?" My not so blind date asks. Jasper's glare screams "I dare you."
"Lover boy over there," I confirm with a nod in his direction.
"Okay, I have to hear that story, too."
"I'll tell you mine if he tells you his," he smirks. I kick the man under the table. Traitor. I decide that if I have to tell this story that I'm going to embarrass the fuck out of him in the process. It's only fair as far as I'm concerned.
"Nope, I get to tell both. You just have to sit there and look pretty, Casper."
"Fuck. Whatever, just tell it already." He's resolved to his fate, much like a man before a firing squad. I take aim. This will be slow and painful. No mercy killing tonight.
.
.
A/N: Soooo, it's lovebug season in Florida. For those of you lucky enough to not know what these things are, they're flying black bugs, about an inch long with a bright orange spot on their backs. Years ago, some dingbats over at the University of Florida with more brains than common sense thought it would be funny to engineer a bug that fused together at the ass when it mated. Hence the term "lovebug". Unfortunately, the fuckers escaped and now there are swarms of them EVERYWHERE! They don't bite, but they splat all over your car and their goo eats away the paint. Not to mention they stink. Horribly. What bug drives you bonkers? (And please don't mention the eight-legged creepy things. They're a given.)
Thank you to GG for taking a break from her porn-a-thon and looking this over for me. I kid. It was merely a NSFW slideshow. Love you, lady.
Barburella, I owe you all the things, but you knew this already.
Dear readers, thank you for reading and leaving feedback. You are wonderfully and beautifully made! MWAH!