A/N: I don't usually do a/n type stuffs like this, but I no longer have the ability to make strange comments in chapter summaries, so um…here I am. *^_^*; Just thought I'd let you know that the introductory segment of this ficcy is about ready to come to a close! Isn't that exciting? *watches as the readers fall out of their chairs* Eheh…*^.^*;; (told ya this is gonna be a whopper) *^_~*;

Chapter 10
"Second Try"

Alright…I can do this…I mean, how hard can it be right…?

Let's see now…I'm supposed to say…Right…Okay…I'm supposed to say…Things are going great for me! I…um…I forgot……No, no, no…I've gotta remember it…Okay…Let's try this again…I……have a lot of things going for me…I'm the Pokémon Champion…I…have good friends…I have my mom right here…and Pikachu, of course……Um…What else…?…Maybe I should've asked him to write it down for me……

I shifted in bed. So far, none of the above was helping to comfort me at all…I was about to go to sleep after all, and that threat was a lot stronger than these lies I was telling myself…

I shivered slightly and brought the blanket closer around me. Pikachu was half-woken by that and moved closer to me, then he sighed sleepily and went back to sleep.

I think…Oliver said I'm…supposed be a good person…? He did say something about that……Well, okay…Um…

I don't like to lie…and by this time I knew better than to lie to myself…but that's what Oliver told me to do…He didn't say it in those exact words, but the things he was telling me to say…They were lies……How could I possibly be a good person if I was killing myself…?

……I guess we can skip that one……What else…?…Oh yeah…Something about…not ruining everything because of these dreams……Well, isn't that just a bunch of……

…He might have a point there……

…Shut up already…

…This isn't getting me anywhere…

…Wasn't there something else…?

………Yeah……This isn't going to work but…Well, here goes…Um…Okay, listen you dreams……go away……um…Yeah…

…That was stupid…

…Yeah, it was……

            *  *  *

The first thing I noticed when I woke up…was that nothing from last night had helped…at all…If it was at all possible, I would've said that they'd made it worse…but I knew better. Those dreams couldn't care less what was going on in…'reality'……

……no……

"…Pikapi…?"
'…Ash…?'

No…

…Pikachu…?

"Pikaa…?"
'Are you awake…?'

…No……

"…Pikapi…?"
'…Hello…?'

"Is he awake…?" Misty asked.

"Pika…"
'I think so…'

Misty gently shook my shoulder. "Wake up, sleepyhead…"

I blinked but didn't move.

"…Oh, come on. We know you're awake…Why don't you get up and get changed, then we can go downstairs and eat breakfast."

I groaned and rolled over. Pikachu jumped up to Misty to get out of the way. I sighed and sat up, then got up to do just that.

"And don't forget to change your-!"

"I know, Mom……"

            *  *  *

My appointment was at one, so we had plenty of free time until then. Plenty of time was not what I wanted. It left me with absolutely nothing to do except listen to eveyone else talk about nothing at all. Breakfast was nothing special. Typical PokéCenter food…I've tried it all before. It's not bad, and it's not like they have a bad selection, but it gets old after five years.

Afterwards, Brock suggested that we take a walk. Misty complained that we'd all seen more than enough of the city the day before, and she didn't really want to walk her legs off again. It was all the same to me, and as far as I could tell, walking was better than hanging around the Pokémon Center, so I told Brock I'd go with him, and I did.

I tried to listen to Brock as we walked, but his idea of cheering me up was to talk about was girls, and whenever we passed one, he would forget about me until he was rejected again…More than once he praised me on my "catch" and jokingly asked me for advice. I didn't really say anything. As far as I could tell, he was still the expert when it came to women. He had years more experience than I did…I probably was just suffering from beginner's luck again…

Still, the walk and the talk weren't enough to keep my mind off of other things or brighten my spirits any by the time we got back. Nothing special happened at the Pokémon Center…They failed to cheer me up…We ate lunch. We went next door at one o'clock.

            *  *  *

"Welcome back, Ash…" Oliver greeted me when we were back in his office.

I looked around at the different chairs. Pikachu was riding on my shoulder again. "You think we could use the couch today…?" I asked.

"Um…Well, sure…I'll go get it out."

He walked over to another door, opened it, then dragged out a long, red couch.

"There you go…" he said.

I went over to it and sat down. It was leatherish and a little bouncy.

"…Am I supposed to lie down?"

"Well, yes, that's what it's for…"

"…Okay…"

I lifted Pikachu off my shoulder, swung my legs up onto the seat and laid down with my head on the little pillow. It was a little uncomfortable at first, so I shifted around until it felt okay. Pikachu hopped over and also made himself comfortable, right next to my head.

Oliver observed us for a moment, then sat down in one of the chairs. He pulled out his clipboard and wrote a little in it.

"Well, you've sparked my curiosity," he began, "Why don't you tell me why you decided you want to use the couch today?"

"…I got too much sleep last night…I guess I'm tired…"

He stopped writing and stared at me for a moment. When he recovered, he wrote hurriedly for a while, then stopped and looked up at me again.

"Uh…Speaking of sleep…why don't you go and tell me how everything went last night…?"

"……Same old, same old…Maybe a little worse……"

He nodded slowly and wrote some more. "…I guess it didn't work very well then…?"

Brilliant deduction…

He waited a little longer for me to answer and then sighed. "This does seem to be very serious, doesn't it…?"

You bet…

"……Ash, can you tell me what happened in your dreams?"

"……I died and came back as a ghost…" I told him. It was very close to being the truth as far as I could tell, but it wasn't the truth…

He nodded while writing and smiled slightly, probably because I had actually said something.

"…How did you die?" he asked next.

"……I killed myself…" Another almost-truth.

He stopped nodding. I think he looked just a little frightened. "…Do you know why you did that…?"

I didn't answer him right away…Now that he brought it up, I wasn't sure I knew…but there had to be a good reason.

"……I…don't know……"

He nodded again, slowly. "What about afterwards, when you were a ghost? What happened then?"

"…I went back and saw all my friends……"

He wrote a little. "…and…?"

"…and……I…don't know………They were all surprised to see me…but…they were happy that I was back……most of them were…"

"…Who wasn't?"

Why do you care?

I rolled over so I was facing away from him. "…No one," I muttered.

"…What was that?"

"…I said no one."

"…But someone must have…"

"No one important, okay!?"

"Piikapi…"
'Ash…'

It got cold in that room very suddenly. Very cold…I tried to stop the shaking, the crying…but they came as strong as ever…

"…Ash?"

Quit it, Oliver…

I heard him stand up and walk over to me. "…Are you alright…? Do you want to stop for a little while…?"

Just quit it……

"…I'm sorry, I guess we were going too fast, huh…?"

I closed my eyes. I didn't want to listen to him. I didn't want to listen to anyone…or anything…

…but not listening to anything in the 'real' world left me unprotected and an easy target for everything else…

"…Pikapi…?"
'…Ash…?'

…What is it, Pikachu…?

Pikachu tapped me lightly on the head.

"Pikapi…"
'Ash…'

Ash, this isn't the time or the place…

I groaned and sat up. "What…?"

"Pika…" Pikachu told me and jumped into my lap.
'Don't do that…'

Oliver smiled hesitantly at me. I was still shaking, and I could feel a lump in my throat. He sat down again and faced me, still wearing that smile.

"Ash…Do you want to talk about what's this that's troubling you?"

"…No…"

He sighed and looked down for a moment, then looked up at me, still straining to keep that smile on his face. "I understand how you feel, Ash…but you need to tell me what's wrong or else I can't help you……"

"If you understand how I feel, doesn't that mean you already know what's wrong?"

Ha, take that…

"……Ash, you have a very special situation here, but feelings remain the same for each person. When we're in a stressful situation, we feel tense. When something is troubling us, we feel nervous and worried. If something sad happens, we feel sorrowful. If something is beyond our control, we feel helpless…Aren't you feeling these things, Ash?"

……You just have to be right, don't you…?

"…It's difficult to talk about your dreams because you feel so strongly about them, isn't it?"

…Maybe…

"…Let's experiment, shall we?"

…Huh?

He spread out his arms. I noticed that his clipboard was resting against the arm of his chair. He probably put it down a while ago.

"Ash, let go of your emotions. Just for a moment. Can you do that for me?"

…Okay, he just crossed the weird line…

"…Are you trying it?"

He wants me to 'let go of my emotions'?

He held himself in that position tensely for a few more seconds then slumped slightly. "Ash, you need to cooperate if you want this to work."

I looked down.

You really think this is gonna work?

"……Ash?"

I sighed and imitated him carelessly. "Alright, letting go of emotions here…" I said flatly.

He looked relieved and went back to that and closed his eyes. "Good…Now close your eyes…"

I stared at him. He gradually opened one eye, then stopped the whole letting go of emotions thing when he saw I wasn't closing my eyes.

"You're just not in a good mood today, are you…?" he sighed.

"Got no reason to be," I replied sullenly.

"Hm……" He looked around the room, tapping his pencil against his thigh. "Ash, when do you think you'll be ready to talk to me about these dreams?"

"…I don't think it's a matter of 'when'…It's probably a matter of…um…'never'…"

He sighed. "If you don't want to talk about them, then…how am I supposed to help you?"

"…Guess you can't then…?"

"…But I have to. That's what we're here for."

"…Then you'd better figure something out."

He scratched his head. "Well……there's…always……eh…but no, that's only as a last resort……"

"…Huh?"

"……I could use my Hypno to put you under hypnosis, and then you'll be able to tell me everything without your emotions getting in the way…but…it's not very ethical…"

…Not very ethical? Who cares about ethics…?

I blinked.

"…Hypno…?"

He nodded absently. "Yes, my Hypno. He's been specially trained for this kind of work…"

"…W-wait, isn't that a little dangerous to use a Hypno's sleepwaves on humans?"

He nodded again, "Yes, but like I said, this Hypno's been specially trained so problems like that won't occur…"

Problems like that…? So he does know what I'm talking about…

Back when we were passing through Hop-Hop-Hop Town, a Hypno that had been used to help adult humans fall asleep at night had also been unwittingly emitting sleepwaves that were making the kids in town think that they were Pokémon……Lucky them……

"……You said a Hypno, right?"

"Yes…"

"…Hypno…can learn Dream Eater…can't it…?"

His eyes widened and he nodded again.

…This could be a good thing…

"……Does your Hypno know Dream Eater…?"

"……I…believe so……"

This could be a very good thing…

I looked up at him again, suddenly hopeful…suddenly seeing a chance for…

"Ash, are you saying…you want Hypno to…eat your dreams?"

I nodded, slowly.

All of them…I want them all gone! I don't care how!

He gritted his teeth nervously. "I don't know, Ash…Dream Eater can be a dangerous attack……"

"Who cares, as long as it works?…And even if it doesn't work…who cares?"

I could tell I was starting to sound desperate…but like I said, who cares? I had found a sliver of hope and I wasn't about to let it just slip away because of something silly like it being dangerous.

"…I still don't know…"

"……Please…?"

His face showed nothing but tense uncertainty as he removed a Pokéball from his pocket and examined it critically.

 "…Ash, I don't think……I don't think this is a good idea…This isn't an approved method of therapy, and there's a chance that you…or even Hypno could get hurt in the process…It's unhealthy for Hypno to eat bad dreams, and from what you've been telling me, yours sound very bad indeed…"

HypnoHypnoHypno…Oh who cares!? I want these dreams GONE…

"Can't…can't you just give him an antacid or something? Please? This…I think this could work, Dr. Marshall…"

"…Oliver," he reminded me gently.

"Oliver then…Look, if anything happens to me…I promise I won't sue you. This was my idea, and besides I really don't need the money…If this does work, then…then…then you'll be my favorite person in the world! And I don't really care if it doesn't work, because I don't think there's much that could possibly be worse than this! And even if there is…I…don't…care…Trying something's better than just not doing anything, isn't it?"

"…Inaction usually isn't the best bet…but……"

"We have to at least give it a try…"

"Eh…" He shook his head firmly. "No. It's too dangerous. I won't allow it. Dream Eater Is supposed to damage its target. I don't want you to get hurt."

"Don't worry about me! Really, whatever happens, I'm sure I can handle it…"

If at all possible, I think that made him more skeptical than ever…

"…Well, what about Hypno? As a Pokémon Master, wouldn't it be irresponsible for you to intentionally harm a Pokémon outside of battle…?"

True…

"Well…Why don't we ask Hypno?"

"Ask…Hypno…?" he said hesitantly.

I nodded. "Yeah. If Hypno doesn't want to, then……"

I didn't want to finish my sentence. I was supposed to say "then we don't have to," but…I wanted to anyway…

Oliver sighed. "…Alright…"

There was a white flash, and the light formed itself into a large yellow Pokémon with a white ruff of a mane and holding a pendulum.

"Hypno…" he said upon appearing.

I was suddenly hit with an unsettling sense of déjà vu, but I gritted my teeth and tried to ignore it.

"Hey, Hypno," I asked, "Do you think you could use Dream Eater on me?"

Hypno blinked. "Hypno…?"
'What…?'

"Hypno," Oliver said, "Ash here has been having some nightmares that he wishes to be rid of. He wants to know if you'd be willing to…eat them…"

"Hypno…" Hypno considered this.
'Eat them…?'

Oliver nodded at his Pokémon. "Yes. With Dream Eater."

"Hyp…no…?"
'Isn't that a little dangerous?'

"Hypno, I don't care if I get hurt, I just want to make sure that you don't mind if something happens to you," I interrupted.

"Hypno, hyp…no…"
'I would like to see these dreams before I attempt to get rid of them…'

Huh…?

"…You think you might be able to get rid of them without eating them?" I asked.

"You can understand him?" Oliver asked in surprise.

I glanced at him. "Yeah…"

"Do you own a Hypno…?"

"…No……"

"Oh, I see. You're a Pokémon Master. You must be able to understand Pokémon even if you haven't caught them yet."

Not…really……

"Uh…Yeah, that must be it." I turned to Hypno. "Well?"

He shook his head. "Hypno, hyp, no…"
'No, I'm afraid I would have to eat them…'

"Oh…Well…Wanna try eating them then…?"

"…It's up to you Hypno…" Oliver said quietly, "Though if you don't think you can pull this off without either of you getting hurt, I'd prefer it if you not try at all…"

"Hypno."
'Either way, I'd have to put him to sleep first.'

Sleep…?

I didn't say anything, but there was a cold feeling deep inside of me at the mention of that word.

Oliver turned to me. "What do you say, Ash? I for one think we should try regular Hypnosis first if we're going to try something like this at all…"

I shifted uncomfortably. I'd kind of forgotten that I had to be asleep for Hypno to eat my dreams, and I didn't like the idea of being hypnotized either…but…if it worked…

"…You're the doctor here…"

He nodded in understanding. "I say we try Hypnosis first, and if that doesn't get us anywhere and Hypno is up for it…we can try Dream Eater."

"…Alright…"

"Pikachu, why don't you sit over here…?" Oliver suggested, patting the armrest next to him.

"Pi…ka?"
'Um…You sure?'

"Go ahead, Pikachu…" I said.

"Chu…" Pikachu said reluctantly and hopped over to sit next to Oliver.
'Okay…'

I sat tensely and waited for Oliver to make the next move. I could feel a knot forming in my gut…It was like something was trying to tell me that this was not a good idea…but we were too close to turn back…and besides, if I didn't put up with the hypnosis first, then Oliver would never let Hypno try Dream Eater…

…but still…

"Are you ready, Ash?" he asked kindly.

I gulped and nodded.

"Just try to relax…"

"I'm trying my best here…" I replied, the tension very audible in my voice.

"Ash…You know, this isn't a real sleep. It's more of a…state of mind…One where you'll find it easier to communicate…You should be able to tell me about these dreams and then I'll be able to help you find a way to…end them."

I nodded. I wasn't really paying attention. That feeling was still there, and it wasn't going away…

"Now, just focus on Hypno and let him guide you through this…"

I looked at Hypno. I was scared. Even I couldn't believe how scared I was…

It's…not that big a deal… I told myself, Just get this part over with and then…then we can try Dream Eater and everything will be fine…Besides, nothing bad can happen during Hypnosis…right…?

Right. Of course not.

…I'm scared…

"Hypno…" Hypno said and begun swinging the pendulum.
'Concentrate…'

I watched, but I couldn't ignore that nervousness…I was really scared…

"Hyp…no……Hyp…no……Hyp…no…"
'Just…relax…There's nothing to be afraid of…'

How could you tell…!?

I would have said that out loud, but Hypno's sleepwaves were already starting to take effect. Spirals of sleep washed upon me. I started to lose track of what I was seeing and I think I completely lost my sense of touch. I felt like I was drifting, not to sleep, but somewhere very…black…

Is this…Is this where the dreams are coming from…?

My vision faded into the blackness, but I still felt very much awake. I was surrounded by the blackness, cold, dark and threatening. I felt small and helpless in this thick void of black…It surrounded me completely…I felt…lost in it…

Where am I…?

I felt something…a gut feeling that someone was calling out to me from beyond the blackness…but the blackness was neverending. How could anyone be beyond it…?

What…is this…? This…I don't think this was supposed to happen…Maybe this is what I was so scared of…It feels like…It feels like one of my dreams…but stronger…deeper…This must be the source…It's so cold here…and black…but why…?

I was surrounded by cold and black…but in a way, it was almost comforting…It was as if it wanted to become a part of me and let me become a part of it…and then there would be peace because I wouldn't feel alone anymore…and then I would never have to leave this place, and I would never sleep, and I would never dream…

I wanted that…I wanted anything that would protect me from my dreams, and this blackness promised that it would…I offered myself to the blackness…I wanted to let it have me…Let me become part of the blackness…

A sharp pain ran through me. I cried out. I wondered if this was part of what the blackness was, but I realized that the blackness couldn't fully reach me. Something was holding me back, filling me with pain. I shouted at it to let go, to let me go…but it only held me tighter. I felt like I was choking in its grasp.

THIS IS NOT YOUR PLACE

My breath gave out.