Thank you for your reviews of the last chapter. I know that up until now, it's been a bit of a depressing story, and I want to thank you for sticking with it. Things do seem be changing, though; as you may have noticed, the rating for this story just went up... take that as you will. I apologize for not warning you at the end of the last piece, if you feel the need to be warned about such things, but well, it kind of sneaked up on me, too. Anyway, enjoy!
Even after Derek changed back into his own clothing and had spoken to the salesman about having the suit custom-tailored, it took him and Meredith a while to leave the store. She kept finding stray items of clothing for him to try, and somehow, she kept ending up in the changing room with him. When they finally emerged, their skin was flushed, and their hair was dishevelled. The salesman winked at Meredith as they passed, and once again intimated to Derek that he might like to find something for the lady. But Meredith grabbed his hand and pulled him along behind her after he'd paid for the suit and had picked up the bag containing his new cashmere sweater.
"I found exactly what I wanted," Meredith told the salesman.
They left the store and continued up Fifth Avenue, ducking into small boutiques as they went. Time and time again, Meredith followed him into his dressing room, and he finally started picking up items for her as they made their way to the back of the store.
"Are you going to try on that dress?" Meredith asked with a smirk as he picked out a strapless midnight blue dress that she realized went perfectly with the suit he'd chosen earlier.
He shook his head, thrusting it at her. "You are," he said, grinning. "I happen to need a date for this fancy work thing, and I was hoping you'd accompany me."
Meredith smiled softly. "I'll think about it," she said.
"Good. Try on the dress."
Unlike Meredith, Derek behaved himself in the dressing room, but he'd later admit that it was because the area was filled with other women, who were flitting back and forth with items to try. Meredith slipped into one of the changing rooms and was just pulling the dress on when she heard a seductive female voice beyond the door.
"Oh, can you give me a hand with this?" the woman asked, and Meredith knew in her gut that the person being addressed was Derek. "My zipper seems to be stuck," the woman continued. Meredith almost yanked the dress she was pulling on back off in frustration and threw open the door, but instead, she opened the door just a fraction, enough that she could see out without being seen.
"I'm Trish," the other woman continued. Through the crack in the door, Meredith could see that she was tall and leggy. Meredith's stomach twisted. If she had red hair, Meredith was going out there, clothing or no clothing. Her gaze swept upward, and she took in the woman's honey-blonde hair, falling over her shoulders. Derek said something that she couldn't hear, and then he stood to help the woman with the stuck zipper.
Meredith gasped and lost her balance as she tried to see if her husband's hand lingered on the woman's shoulder. She started to tip forward and the door flew open just before Meredith landed on her knees, the fabric of the dress making a horrid ripping sound as it got caught beneath her.
"Mer?" Derek asked with concern. Trish's eyes went wide and her mouth made a circle of surprise.
Derek left Trish where she stood and dropped down to help his wife. "Meredith?" he asked again. She blinked up at him, her face burning with humiliation.
"I – I…this stupid dress!" she exclaimed, suddenly hating it. Her eyes watered. "Damn it. I think I ruined it," she whispered.
"What were you doing?" Derek asked her.
She shook her head vehemently, glancing up at Trish.
"Oh," Derek said. He grinned at her and burst out laughing.
"Stop it!" she admonished him. She groaned and then hissed under her breath. "Help me!"
Derek's eyes filled with tears of laughter and he was helpless for several minutes while he laughed.
"Derek!" Meredith tried again.
"Okay," he gasped. He helped her up and shielded her as much as he could from the amused and horrified eyes that surrounded her. When Meredith was safely in the changing room again, she pulled him in behind her and closed the door with a thud.
"That was the highlight of this trip for me," he said, as solemnly as he could muster.
"God," Meredith groaned. "I can't go out there again."
"Sure you can," Derek reasoned. "They'll leave eventually."
She groaned again and stepped out of the remains of the dress. "I ruined it," she winced. "Was it really expensive?"
Derek picked up the dress and held it away from her.
"Don't worry about it," he told her.
"No, how much was it?" she asked him.
"Mer, it's fine."
"Derek, how much?"
He consulted the tag. "Two grand."
"Two thousand dollars?" Meredith gasped. "It's … it's a cocktail dress."
He shrugged. "Like I said, don't worry about it."
"You can't pay for it, Derek. I ruined it."
"Yeah, well…"
"No, it was my stupidity."
"Or your jealousy," he said in a soft voice, smirking at her.
Meredith folded her arms across her chest. "I am not jealous."
"Really?" he challenged her.
"I don't even know what you're talking about," Meredith denied.
"Oh, so maybe I should go back out there and help the pretty blonde with her zipper."
"You think she's pretty?" Meredith asked with a frown.
He shook his head. "Mer, I think lots of people are attractive, sure." He shrugged. "But I think you're beautiful."
She rolled her eyes. "Now you're just trying to butter me up."
"Mmmhmm," he agreed. "I was doing pretty well, earlier."
He reached out and ran the palm of his hand over her smooth, bare shoulder, then pulled her close and kissed her until she was breathless. "Is it working yet?" he asked when he pulled away.
Meredith blinked slowly, trying to clear the cloudiness from her vision.
"Uh," she managed.
He chuckled. "Wait here," he said. A few minutes later, he returned with an identical blue dress.
"Try again," he said, handing it to her.
"Why?" she asked.
"Because," he said patiently. "You still need something to wear."
"No, Derek. It's too much. You're already paying for the one I ruined."
"Meredith, seriously," he said, using the same tone that her friends often did to stress the second word. "Just try the dress on, please. Humour me. I want to see you in it so I know what my two grand would have paid for."
She sighed and took the second dress from him, then put it on and opened the door again. Derek was back sitting where he'd been earlier, flipping through an issue of In Style.
Meredith stood in the doorway, gazing at him. He was sprawled comfortably in the chair and his dark hair fell over his eye. He looked up, as though sensing her looking at him, and pushed the hair away, revealing his twinkling blue eyes. Meredith sucked in a sharp breath as he smiled easily at her. She shook her head, not failing to feel a swell of pride that he was hers. Derek stood and approached her, and she noticed how his blue eyes had darkened to a shade that wasn't far off from that of the dress. His eyes were filled with lust and she took a step back. Derek followed her and they were once again sealed off in a dressing room.
"Meredith," he breathed, his hands skimming her bare arms.
She laughed softly. "Okay, settle down," she instructed him.
He grinned.
"Come on," she implored him. "You don't want to tear another one, do you?"
"Hmmm," he said. "I might consider it a loss worth taking."
"Derek…"
"Meredith…" he responded in kind.
"Take the dress off," he whispered.
She rolled her eyes. "See?"
"Meredith," he groaned. "Take the dress off so we can go home."
She blinked. They'd been teasing each other all afternoon, but she had counted on it being a game that would end when they returned to Elizabeth's house. All afternoon, she'd told herself that it was okay to play this game with him because they both understood that it was just that. But now…
Seeing her husband be hit on by another woman was nothing new, but today, it bothered her more than it usually did. She didn't want him doing up the zipper on some leggy blonde's dress. She wanted him undoing the zipper on hers.
Meredith looked up at him. "Home," she echoed breathlessly.
"Well, my mom's," he said, gifting her with a charming, crooked smile.
"Yes," she said. She pushed him toward the door. "Out."
Once she was alone, she slipped out of the dress and then reluctantly hung it back on the hanger. When she'd put her own clothing back on, she carried the dress out of the changing room and started to hand it back to the salesgirl, but Derek intercepted.
"We'll take it," he said decisively.
"Oh, Derek, no."
"Meredith, do you know how hot you looked in that dress?"
She blushed. "Well, then it's hardly appropriate for a work function, is it?"
"So, we'll find some other place for you to wear it," he said, his voice low in her ear as he bent down to kiss her just above it.
"You already…"
"Yeah, so?" he argued. "It's a gift, Mer. Just let me buy it, okay?"
Meredith sighed. "Okay," she agreed.
The salesgirl smiled brightly. "Okay, then," she chirped. "If you'll just follow me to the register."
When they finally left the store, Derek retrieved the car from the valet and pulled back into the slow-crawling traffic. It was nearing rush hour and it took them a couple of frustrating hours to get back to Elizabeth's house. By the time they did, they were starving and so they were simultaneously relieved and disappointed when Derek opened the door to an empty house.
"Mom?" he called, moving into the kitchen, hoping to find her – and dinner – there. But neither were to be found.
"I guess she went out," Derek said, returning to the living room, where Meredith had collapsed on the couch.
"Did she leave anything in the fridge?" Meredith asked hopefully. She shook her head. "God, listen to me. Your poor mom."
Derek chuckled. "She's used to it," he said. "And there are probably some leftovers in there."
Meredith followed him back into the kitchen and he looked inside the fridge, finding some cold chicken and a green salad inside. Derek fixed them each a plate, and then found a bottle of Chardonnay. He opened it and poured them each a glass.
Conversation over dinner was light-hearted, although Meredith still felt terrible about the dress.
And then dinner was over, the dishes had been done and put away, and they were forced to deal with what they'd been flirting with all day.
"So," Derek said, following her into the living room.
"Do you think your mom will be home soon?" Meredith asked, sitting down on the couch and reaching forward to flip through a coffee-table book.
"I don't know," Derek said softly. "I think she thinks that we need some time alone."
Meredith turned to him, her eyes wide. "Yeah," she agreed softly.
"Do you think she's right?" he asked with a nervous quality that completely threw her for a loop. Derek Shepherd did not suffer from a lack of self-confidence.
"Yeah," Meredith said softly. She closed the book that sat on the table and turned to him. "We had a nice talk this morning, actually."
Derek's eyebrows shot up. "You did?"
"Yeah." Meredith edged closer to him. "I told her that I was feeling a little bit apprehensive about being with you."
Derek coughed. "You told my mom that we're not having sex?"
"She said she has five children and fourteen grandchildren, and she's heard everything," Meredith smiled.
"Yeah, but she's my mother," Derek protested.
"I'm sorry," Meredith apologized.
"Did she talk you into it?" he asked, with a mischievous grin.
"What?" Meredith spluttered.
He grinned harder. "Did she convince you to sleep with me? Is that why you were practically jumping me in the dressing room today?"
Meredith shook her head. "I was not jumping you!"
"I said practically," he smirked.
"Oh!" she exclaimed. She reached for one of the cushions and smacked him with it.
The force of the blow knocked him backwards, but he was quick, snaking his arms around her and pulling her down with him, on top of him. And then he kissed her and he quickly came to the conclusion that he didn't care who or what had convinced her. He was just thankful that she released the pillow to hold on to him.
Derek didn't want to jinx himself, but the way that Meredith was pressed against him, he couldn't help worrying that she saw sex as one more hurdle to clear; it was one more box she needed to tick off to get over the loss of their baby. So he reluctantly pulled away, breathing rapidly and spoke in a gentle but determined voice.
"Mer, we need to stop."
She blinked, hazy with lust. "What?"
"Stop." He pulled away from her completely, hating how confused and hurt she looked.
"Why?" she asked him. "Your mom?"
"No," he answered, shaking his head. "I have no idea where she went or when she'll be back. And I wasn't planning on taking you on my mother's couch, anyway."
"Okay," Meredith said, confusion seeping into her voice.
Derek sighed. "Do you really want to do this?"
Meredith frowned. "You don't?"
"What?" he asked. And then – "Oh, God. No, Meredith. That's not it. A couple of nights ago, you couldn't sleep with me in the same room and now you want us to make love?"
"Today was a good day," she said softly. She slid off the couch and moved to the chair opposite it.
Derek sighed in frustration. "It was," he agreed. "But I don't want to wake up tomorrow and find you gone because you're scared of what this means for us, and you feel guilty because you're moving on."
She closed her eyes and was silent for a long moment. When she opened them, they were a brighter green than he remembered. "I love you," she told him quietly. "That's all I know."
Derek was silent, contemplating her words. Then he stood and held out his hand to her.
The bedroom was cloaked in semi-darkness. It was nearing evening and already, the sun was setting, leaving shadows in its wake. Derek closed the door softly behind them, tapping it with his foot to close it even as he took Meredith in his arms and kissed her. He recognized that he was holding his breath, waiting for her to pull back, waiting for them to take two steps back.
But Meredith surprised him, stepping back only to pull her t-shirt over her head. She dropped it somewhere at their feet and smiled at him. "Do you think we'll be alone much longer?" she asked.
Derek shrugged, not really caring who was around or not, even his mother. He brought Meredith back to him, angling his mouth over hers and plunging his tongue into its depths even as he brought his hands up to her hair and found the coated elastic which held it back in a low ponytail. Once he'd freed her hair, he combed his fingers through it, feeling it cascade around her shoulders, the scent of wildflowers loosened from its strands. It hadn't been all that long since they'd last made love, he admitted on a subconscious level – time hadn't passed that quickly since they'd learned of the fate of their unborn child – but it felt as though it had been forever.
He tried to be patient and careful with her, not wanting to push for too much too soon, but Meredith had other ideas. She kept him fully engaged in their kiss, so much so that he was almost unaware of her long, delicate surgeon's fingers deftly working on the buttons of his shirt. The button holes on her shirt were tiny and delicate and it would have made her work incredibly frustrating were she not so skilled and within seconds, she was sliding his shirt off of his shoulders and her mouth left his to move along his jaw, down the curve of his neck and over the broad expanse of his shoulder.
Derek was quickly forgetting about his patience and care. Instead, he let his head fall back, giving Meredith greater access to his skin. She sipped and licked along his skin and her hands skimmed the muscles of his abdomen as she slid them down to the skin just above the waistband of his jeans. He went completely slack, letting her drive them along. The only sound in the room – in the whole house, really – was their breathing, rapid and hitched, and when Meredith started to unfasten his jeans, he sucked in his breath and held it. She wouldn't be deterred, but Derek was determined to feel the silky softness of her skin and so he brought his hands up beneath the ends of her hair and skilfully unfastened her bra, letting the straps slide of their own accord down her rounded shoulders.
Derek grinned at her, the smile reaching his eyes, crinkling them as he took in her flushed face and the hair that floated around it like a halo.
"You thought I'd never get the hint, didn't you?" he asked in a low voice and then chuckled.
Meredith smiled coyly and reached up to pull the cups of her bra away, revealing the perfect roundness of her breasts. Her nipples strained towards him, but he chose to prolong the inevitable and instead of closing his mouth over them or teasingly brushing them with the pad of his thumb, he skimmed his hands over her sides, leaving her shivering and breathless. He hooked his thumbs under the waistband of her jeans, pulling her towards him without warning, causing their bodies to collide and her nipples to brush against his chest. It was a thrill and he almost gave in and did what they both wanted him to, but instead, his hands drifted down to her thighs and he brought one of her legs up and moulded her body to his, pressing his erection against her, leaving her with no doubt as to where they stood. And then his mouth found the enticing curve of her neck and he inhaled her: the smell of her skin, the feel of it beneath his lips and tongue and teeth, and the way that she tasted, sweet and slightly salty.
Meredith let out a whimper of surprise and a moan of frustration as Derek's mouth and hands continued to tease her without assuaging any of her pain, and she wound her fingers in his hair, tugging on his now out-of-control curls, guiding his mouth lower and lower, closer and closer, until his mouth found her nipple and closed around it, gently tugging on it until Meredith was nearly weeping.
"Derek," she said, over and over again, chanting his name, pushing towards him, seeking a place to come together with him. Fortunately, the size of the room, which she had feared on the first day of their visit, was conducive to her quest and they toppled together onto the double bed, not breaking contact with each other. They were still clothed from the waist down, and this proved to be a frustration for both of them that they were keen to obliterate, so they parted only momentarily, shedding what remained of their clothing before coming back together.
Derek felt the urgency that Meredith had earlier and his hands roamed everywhere at once, wanting to touch and feel every part of her and have her do the same. Meredith happily obliged and when she started to slide down the bed, there was a look of determination in her eyes that left him breathless. But he was adamant that their lovemaking not be one-sided and so he squirmed away from her, which left her frowning in his wake. But he quickly silenced her protests with a kiss that left both of them dazed, panting, and desperately wanting. When they parted, he moved quickly, repositioning himself so that he was looking up at her from the foot of the bed. Meredith's skin was flushed and damp and he slid his hand between her legs, finding her wet and slick. His fingers gathered some of the moisture, lubricating them. He slid one inside her and she immediately contracted around it; surprised at how quickly it happened, her eyes widened and she let out a soft moan. Derek smiled and raised himself a little on his elbows, then tugged Meredith down so that he had access to her clit with his mouth. He let his tongue slide along the crease, between her folds, from top to bottom and Meredith gasped. She shivered, her entire body shuddering as she tried to restrain her body's reaction to his touch.
He spoke against her and the vibrations of his words left her trembling.
"What do you want, Mer?" he asked her.
She shook her head, unable to speak, nearly incoherent. She twisted towards him, just slightly and he felt the wet warmth of her mouth on him, and her tongue teased him mercilessly. Derek nearly passed out as his nerves carried the incredible sensation along, leaving his entire body tingling and charged. He increased the force and pace of his ministrations and smiled in delight and a sort of macho pride as Meredith reached out and grasped fistfuls of the sheets in her fingers. Somehow, he found a reserve of self-control and managed to reach out to link his fingers with his, pulling them away from the sheets and giving her a new anchor, and in the process giving himself one as well. He continued to use his mouth and tongue against her and finally, he felt her release building to a point of no return. He pulled away just prior to when she would lose control and smiled at her. Her eyes were half-closed, lust-filled, desirous, darker than he would ever have imagined her pale green eyes could be. She took him in her mouth again, intent on pushing him over the edge and he groaned as he felt his own release to be imminent.
"Meredith…" he hissed. "Mer, please."
Her tongue swirled and dipped and slid.
"God, Mer," he panted. He screwed his eyes closed, fought, fought, fought to hold on.
And then she released him. The lack of warm, wet pressure from her mouth left him disconcerted and he almost cried at the sudden loss of sensation. But Meredith took pity on him, or they took pity on each other, he wasn't sure which. Either way, he was between her legs and then he was plunging, deeper, deeper, until he couldn't push forward any further. She was tight and warm and wet and wanting, and he pushed the damp hair away from her face and met her eyes before he started thrusting. In and out and his hips flexed and her thighs stretched to accommodate him. Her hands roamed over his back and then lower and she gripped his ass with her fingernails, digging them into the skin and they bit into him. He didn't care. He was nearly mindless and he pushed and she moaned. He pushed again and she let out a half-sob, half-laugh. Push and pull as her hands pulled him into her, encouraging him to a depth he'd never thought he could reach. And then he felt her tremble and clench around him and pump him. He groaned, and the sound of it bounced off the walls in the tiny bedroom with the bed that would be much too small if it wasn't perfect to accommodate them like this.
Meredith cried out as she came and he kept moving, driving harder until she orgasmed a second time and then a third. On her final intense clenching motion, he released into her, and then collapsed, breathless and spent.
He stayed above her and inside her until he took pity on her for bearing his weight and pulled out, rolling off to her side.
It took them some time to catch their breath and Derek drew her to his side, burying his face in her soft, silky hair.
"Thank God your mom wasn't here," Meredith sighed and he chuckled.
"Are you kidding me? She was encouraging you!"
Meredith grinned and found his free hand. She traced patterns on his upturned palm and rested her head against his shoulder.
"Are you thirsty?" he asked her. "Or, do you want some more wine or something? I can see if there's anything down there for dessert…"
"Did you work up an appetite?" she teased him. "Or are you trying to make an escape?"
"Neither," he said soberly. "I have no intention of leaving you, Mer. Ever."
"I know that," she said softly, reaching over to trace the tip of her index finger along his lower lip. "Me either."
"Good," he smiled. "So?"
"Wine would be nice," she said. "But water first."
He grinned. "Okay. I'll be right back."
She watched him as he climbed out of bed, taking in his glorious naked body. He turned as he searched for a t-shirt and caught her ogling him. He grinned and winked at her, before proceeding to make a show of it, parading around the bedroom for her. Meredith snorted with laughter, but made a point of telling him what a great ass he had, and great legs and arms and the sexiest smile and how she wished he'd just hurry up already so that they could spend the rest of the night in bed.
He moved in a flash and left the room behind as he nearly jumped down the stairs in his quest for nourishment and the wine and water he'd promised.
He didn't notice Elizabeth until he was halfway through the living room and out of the corner of his eye, he saw the tell-tale glow of an iPod screen. He turned and his mother turned on the lamp beside her, and then pulled the earbuds out of her ears.
"Handy little things, aren't they?" she asked him, her grin matching his most mischievous ones. "Of course," Elizabeth continued. "It's rather unfortunate that they decreased the volume on these things. You can still hear everything."
Derek stammered, his mouth opening and closing in shock until his mother laughed.
"Julie forgot it here," she said. "Which is just as well. I'm going to go stay with them tonight." She winked at Derek. "I'd wish you a good night, but I don't think that's necessary, do you?"
He shook his head, blushing even as a grin spread from ear to ear. Outside a car horn blared and Elizabeth got up and headed for the door.
"I'll see you in the morning," Elizabeth said. "Or, by the sound of it, late afternoon?" She chuckled at his expression before she left, leaving him to retrieve the wine.