Tikal the Echidna stood on the edge of a giant bongo drum (yes, a giant bongo drum), purple Chaos Emerald in hand, her traveling companions behind her. She had chosen this spot in the Glade of Dreams as their destination because it allowed them a wide, spectacular view of most of the region—from the swirling, cotton candy-like canopy of the Dream Forest to the north, to the hot fudge mountains of Candy Chateau to the west. Behind her was Band Land, which was pretty much exactly what it sounded like: a cornucopia of giant instruments, ranging from bass drums that boomed with every step, to piano staircases that would become a flat slope if they didn't like the tune you played, to clarinets and oboes whose horns pointed straight up, blowing those brave enough to take a leap of faith onto higher planes with perfect pitch (except the oboes, of course). A winding trail displaying a musical staff wound its way through and around the instruments like some delusional hiking trail conceived of not just Snake's "LSD," but Chet Rippo's hallucinogenic Groovy Shrooms, both drugs taken together.
"Um…I think I let my honeycombs ferment," Banjo said. The Isle o' Hags had more than its fair share of bizarre environments, but this took his bear brain to a whole new level of weird.
Tikal smiled. "No, you see correctly, Banjo. The Sony World is home to many unique and colorful things, especially in Craftworld and here in the Glade of Dreams, but I would be willing to bet that if Sonians went to the Nintendo World, they would feel the same way."
Tiny Kong resisted the urge to break out her saxophone and play a few eardrum-shattering notes. "Personally, I think this place is pretty cool. It's amazing how much is outside of Nintendo that we never could've imagined."
"Yeah, Earth's pretty boring compared to Smash Planet," Ness admitted, watching clouds drift across a mountain-sized tuba. "People on my planet know the universe is big…but I never thought there were places that are 'big' like this."
From inside Banjo's backpack, Kazooie sniffed, unimpressed. "You should see Cloud Cuckoo Land; that Jello castle was one thing, but when we ran into that freakish lookalike Mingy Jongo, I thought I'd been smokin'—"
Suddenly, a webbed white hand attached to an elastic blue arm whipped out from behind an upright quarter note and slapped the Breegull full in the face, retracting a fraction of a second later accompanied by a fit of deep giggles.
Kazooie blinked in surprise and shook off the blow, narrowing her eyes and looking out at the series of floating black notes spread across the bongo.
"All right, someone just asked for a Grenade Egg to the gizzard. Show yourself, you cowardly pile of seagull droppings!"
A blue blur leapt from behind the quarter note to a quartet of sixteenth notes—and slapped Kazooie again, followed by even louder laughter.
"That's it!" Without waiting for Banjo's permission, she flew out of the backpack and coughed up Grenade Eggs, destroying one note after the other as she followed the hopping blur around the perimeter of the drum. Finally, the entire stanza obliterated, her assailant had nowhere to go but out in the open, landing on the bongo with an echoing thud.
It was a human-sized frog—albeit one with quite a belly—with noodly arms, crazed eyes, and a wide, gaping mouth that seemed to be fixed in an expression of perpetual laughter.
"Globox likes having fun with dorcas bird!" he warbled, twitching and bouncing and clearly incapable of staying still.
"Dorcas?" Kazooie's anger peaked, her red head feathers even redder than normal, which most wouldn't think possible. "Ok, toady, you just earned yourself the butt-kicking of a lifetime!" She drew out a small, pink, big-eared Glowbo, which, when ingested, would turn her into a lime green dragon capable of incinerating the frog like fried tuna. She made to toss it into her mouth, but her partner beat her to it. Banjo snatched her out of the air, stuffed her into his backpack, cinched the straps shut, and pocketed the Glowbo. He ignored the muffled yells from inside his shaking pack.
Tikal looked interested in Globox, having ignored the entire Kazooie incident. "I believe I know you; you are friends with Rayman, yes? Can you take us to him?"
Globox hopped and spun ecstatically. "Can I? Can Globox take you to Rayman? What a question! The real question is…can you worrywarts keep up with Globox? Ha tee tah!"
He turned and bounced away along the music staff trail, not even glancing back to see if they were following.
"I guess that's our answer," Tiny said, skipping after the frog with the others close behind.
They chased Globox down the winding trail, almost being knocked off by wandering notes. They followed him across a snare drum that was being played by giant sticks, shaking those who failed to jump with each beat like a three-second earthquake. They pursued him across the strings of a viola, the self-playing bow almost knocking them into the depths of the instrument. They tracked him through an ensemble of xylophones, glockenspiels, and marimbas, almost tripping between notes and having to change rows when the mallets came down like giant hammers. They tailed him down a trombone slide that extended and retracted without warning, at the end of which they were blown by its deafening horn onto a suspended cymbal, which spun and almost cast them over the edge like a malignant tilt-a-whirl.
Finally, after recovering from their dizziness, they reached the end of the line—that is, the double bar that signified the end of the staff and the song, with the word fin written in an elegant script font along the side of the black wall (Tiny, being the most familiar with music among them, could only hope there were no repeat marks). Globox skidded to a halt and turned with delight to find they'd survived the journey. He reached behind him and slapped a figure snoozing in a hammock suspended between the stems of the final chord. The figure tumbled out of it and crashed onto the ground. He got back up drowsily, rubbing his eyes and blinking to adjust to the bright light of consciousness.
Rayman was more or less a human with a huge nose and no limbs—that is, he still had hands and feet and a head, but no neck, arms, or legs to connect them, as if he were held together by some powerful magnetic field. His purple shirt, yellow sneakers, and gloved hands didn't attract as much attention as the two wild tufts of yellow hair sprouting from his head like thick weeds.
"You must be the Nintendonians," Rayman yawned, leaning casually against the double bar wall.
"You were expecting us?" Ness asked.
"Well…I wasn't…but Polokus—the seer and creator of This World, who lives in the Dream Forest—he sees everything, and he told me to get a good rest 'cause I'd soon have to be off on some crazy adventure. Usually my travels keep me in the Glades…but you guys look like you've come a long way, so it must be pretty serious. What's gone wrong this time?"
Kazooie burst out of Banjo's pack, having pecked her way through the straps. Her eyes were livid. "I'll tell you…after I murder your frog friend."
In spite of Kazooie's threat, Globox's grin didn't fade even an inch.
Rayman just laughed. "It's good to meet you, too. I can tell we'll get along just fine."
The Tornado tore across the sky, covering the southern regions of Mobius with great efficiency. The lush Green Hill Zone gave way to more urban environments as they neared Mega Land: the smoking factories of Scrap Brain Zone; the elegant loops and towers of Star Light Zone; and the flashing lights of Spring Yard Zone that looked just like a pinball machine from above. The sky deepened to a heavy blue that would remain the same regardless of whether it was day or night.
"Everyone doing all right back there?" Sonic called back from the pilot's seat of the red biplane, the whine of the propeller and the screaming wind making it quite difficult to be heard.
"Just peachy!" Princess Peach said cheerfully, although not all her fellow passengers felt quite the same. Her longtime mentor and advisor, Toadsworth, looked a bit queasy.
"Ugh…with all due respect, your Highness, speak for yourself. I do hope we don't have much further to go. I'm afraid flying isn't quite my forte."
"I second that," Roy called from the back, looking like he was fighting back growing nausea. This brought back memories of that dreadful F-Zero race he'd been coerced into joining—memories he'd been trying hard to forget.
Although Perry the Parasol was unable to unfold himself for fear of being blown off the plane, he piped up from under Peach's seat.
"I've gotta agree with the princess on this one; I'm having a blast!"
Sonic grinned at the mixed feedback. "Ha, well, don't worry; we should reach Central City in just a few minutes."
A few minutes might not be soon enough, Roy thought.
It became clear that they had now crossed the border over to Megaland, for the deep blue sky was now laced with green lines resembling computer circuitry, bending and interlacing and glowing in places like some kind of digital aurora borealis. The urban districts below had also become noticeably higher tech, mostly comprising neon blues and greens that lit the cityscape like pegs on a Lite-Brite board. Futuristic airships crisscrossed between the buildings, making Roy's home in Akaneia look like a primitive nomadic village in comparison.
Sonic pointed down at the tallest and largest of the skyscrapers as he began his descent.
"That's the City Hall; we should find Megaman inside."
They came back around and circled down until they found a place to land on the building's flat roof some thirty stories above the ground (there was no chance of finding a place to land on the streets below). They could see cranes and steel scaffoldings atop several other skyscrapers, the whole city a spectacle of thousands upon thousands of shining windows. Although the humming and beeping of aircrafts continued around them, the place was oddly bereft of both people and robots; no one seemed to venture outside much unless they were already inside their vehicle.
Sonic and the others disembarked, Toadsworth and Roy requiring somewhat of a breather to readjust to solid ground and normal air pressure.
"So, what's the government like here?" Peach asked, ever one to be in the know on political situations. "Is it a kingdom? Democracy? Republic? Is there a legislature and a court system?"
"Yeah, I don't really know," Sonic said, never one to be in the know on political situations. "All I can remember is Megaman and a bunch of other Robot Masters always seemed to be the ones to make things happen. I think Dr. Light, the creator of most of Megaland's bots, acts like some kind of consultant, and then the rest of the people do other stuff."
"I see," Peach said, not really seeing anything. "Well, if we are to establish good diplomatic relations with Megaland, we should meet with these Robot Masters, don't you think?"
"I guess we could," Sonic said. "I was kinda hoping we could just find Megaman, get him on our side, and get out without making much of a fuss."
"Too late for that, meat sacks," an electronic voice boomed from behind them.
They turned to find a squad of Megaman-like robots propelled by rockets landing on the roof, all pointing arm cannons of varying design at the heroes. The speaker was perhaps the most distinct among them, a stern-looking Robot Master in black armor. Beside him, a robotic purple wolf growled at them, metal tubes looping across its back. What was more, at least half a dozen additional robots ran up a staircase onto the roof, forming a complete perimeter. They were surrounded.
"I am Bass, chief of Central City law enforcement. You are trespassing on city property without authorization. Surrender or be destroyed."
"Oh, my!" Toadsworth stammered. "Please don't do that."
But Roy, already sick to his stomach, was not in a good mood for confrontation. He drew his Binding Blade, allowing flames to flicker across the edges.
"Go ahead and try," he said.
"Master Roy!" Toadsworth cried in protest.
But the damage was already done; Bass obliged the boy's challenge by firing a jet of black energy. But the attack was blocked by Perry, who had completely covered Roy in an umbrella shield, then stretched back out and glared at Bass.
"We're not here to cause trouble," he said. "We've got an important mission and we need to see Megaman."
"I'll decide whether you get to see Megaman," Bass said testily. "And right now, I'm not feeling particularly generous. Bots, take them into custody."
Roy was about to strike back, but Sonic put an urgent hand on his arm and shook his head. Grunting with discontent, Roy reluctantly lowered his weapon and allowed himself and the others to be subdued and taken inside.
They were led to a cobalt elevator, which took them down not just thirty floors, but several levels belowground, where they found a holding cell awaiting them made of nothing but smooth steel walls and iron bars. They were shoved inside and left to themselves.
Peach sighed and sat against the wall. "See what happens when we don't engage in civil conversation first?"
Roy just lay down on the cold floor and brooded; he knew he'd acted rashly and this situation was his fault, but he was too angry to deal with it at the moment. He forced himself into an uncomfortable sleep.
The next morning, two bots came for them and led them to the elevator. They were taken down several bright cobalt hallways until they entered a chamber that appeared to be a courtroom, with a semicircular panel of Robot Masters seated behind a raised bench at the front—among them Megaman himself—and a bench reserved for the prisoners. Bass and his robotic wolf, Treble, awaited them on a bench across from theirs, an expression of clear disdain on his humanoid face.
"What's this all about?" Megaman asked with a calm maturity that far surpassed his boyish face. He stood and looked down on Sonic, Peach, Perry, Toadsworth, and Roy. "Sonic? Why are you helping these foreigners into our city?"
"This is all a huge misunderstanding, Megaman," Sonic said. "Roy and your police chief got a bit hot-headed toward each other, but really we're here for something bigger than any petty trespassing squabble."
"I got hot-headed?" Bass fumed. He pointed his arm cannon at the hedgehog. "Why, you—"
"Enough!" Megaman said, which was enough to prevent violence in the courtroom. "Sonic, you know well that as part of the truce ending the Copyright Wars, we agreed that Megaland was to remain neutral in all foreign affairs. Whatever your intentions may be, my people don't take kindly to breaches of contract."
The Nintendonians all looked at Sonic in surprise, none of them having been aware of such conditions. He sighed.
"Sorry, guys. I just didn't think we had time to go through all the formal procedures to get into Megaland to begin with, let alone meet with the Robot Masters and tell them what's going on." He turned to Megaman. "But none of that matters now. What matters is that Microsoft's rekindled the war…and we need the help of all the Sony All-Stars and your people if we're gonna stop them."
"If you say you want to protect Sony from its enemies," Bass said, "then why are you associating yourself with these Nintendonians? Nintendo is as much our enemy now as it was before. You've betrayed the trust of our world to let them infiltrate our inner sanctum, and for that, you must be punished!"
An uproar of approval rang out from the gathered Robot Masters. Crash Man waved his drill arms in the air. Cut Man's scissor-topped head snipped open and closed with indignance. Megaman alone appeared to be carefully considering Bass's words. He looked at Sonic. "Well…Bass has a point. What do you have to say for yourselves?"
Sonic briefly explained the events starting from L.O.G.'s arrival to Microsoft's attack on Dreamland and then their mission to Sony to gain the All-Stars' allegiance.
"Allies?" Bass scoffed dismissively. "More like lies you've invented to escape punishment and help your Nintendo friends take us over! We can't risk taking one rule-breaking Mobian's word when the very security of our civilization is at stake!"
Murmured agreement from the other Robot Masters. Small sparks and flames and circles of whirling leaves suggested how well Bass had emotionally won over his associates.
Finally, Princess Peach couldn't take the bickering any longer. "Please," she said, "we understand your hesitance to trust us. We are complete strangers to your land and your ways, and we apologize for any infractions we've unknowingly committed. If your neighbor's words are not enough to convince you of our good intentions, at least open yourselves to what I have to say.
"Most of us in Nintendo retain no memory of the Copyright Wars; all we have right now are the words of an old book and those of a few of our friends. Solid Snake has told us of how he and the rest of Sony were so cruelly forced to join Microsoft against us at the threat of harm befalling your loved ones. As a ruler in my own kingdom, I understand this, and I know none of us lay any blame on your people for what happened. You never were our enemies, and you certainly aren't now.
"From what little I've seen of Megaland, I can see that you are a just people that want equal treatment for everyone and protection for the innocent. I applaud your police chief for having the integrity to enforce your laws even when it might not be convenient." She looked pointedly at Bass, who was clearly surprised by the compliment. "I don't know the details of your peace settlement with the rest of Sony, but we do have a problem if everyone is determined to act in isolation. Let me explain why.
"When a great evil arose in our neighboring Beanbean Kingdom, we more or less opted to ignore their predicament, though our heroes Mario and Luigi did end up crossing their boundary and lent a helping hand. But even after Cackletta was stopped, because the Mushroom Kingdom did not act immediately to ensure the threat was completely gone, her right-hand minion, Fawful, wreaked unspeakable terror upon our land some time later. My kingdom barely endured the ordeal intact, and even then it was because we'd joined with our enemy, King Bowser, to stop Fawful once and for all. Our insistence on isolation nearly proved our extinction.
"This issue with Microsoft…it is on a much grander scale than Cackletta or Fawful or any conflict among two kingdoms. It is as dangerous as what all of the Nintendo World faced when Master Hand sought to seize control of the entire continent. Had we not banded together as a united world a year ago, we would all be suffering under the oppression of an omnipotent tyrant. And if you do not lay aside your troubled past and do the same, I fear the Sony World may suffer the same fate. My plea, as an ambassador and as a friend who has no desire to interfere with your respectable governance, is that you consider these consequences, and make an informed decision as you deem best."
The courtroom was silent. No one had expected such eloquence in the midst of their quarreling, and the mood had changed dramatically. Finally, Megaman responded.
"You make a convincing case, Princess Peach. Thank you for clearing up our disagreements." He turned to the other Robot Masters. "I think we can agree that none of us want Microsoft to invade us as they have in times past." He then faced Bass. "I feel that their story would be very difficult to fabricate in the spur of the moment; and I believe we face a greater risk not in the chance of their dishonesty leading to Nintendonian conflict, but the chance that Microsoft may be waging a full-scale war on both our worlds, and if we are caught unprepared, we will surely fall before them once again."
Even Bass grudgingly nodded. Megaman, the greatest and most just among them, had well spoken to the convincing of all the Robot Masters.
"Forgive us for imprisoning you," Megaman continued. "Please allow us to begin making reparations by joining us for lunch at one of Central City's finest restaurants. I will then come with you to meet the rest of the All-Stars this evening."
As the vindicated newcomers walked out, Sonic regarded Peach with newfound respect. "How did you manage that?"
Peach shrugged and giggled. "Sometimes sweetness is mightier than the sword."
On the evening of the second day, the Nintendonians, Mobians, and Sonian All-Stars reconvened in the cavern on Angel Island where Tikal had sent them off with the Chaos Emeralds. It was a grand gathering: the crew of The King's Krystal; the hedgehogs and rabbits and echidnas (and Big the Cat) who had guided them across the Sony World and called this place home (The Chao had graciously vacated the cave for their use); and the impressive assortment of All-Stars including Sonic, Snake, Ratchet and Clank, Sly Cooper, Jak and Daxter, Spyro, Crash Bandicoot, Sackboy, Rayman, and Megaman. There was so much to be said and done, so many acquaintances and friends and plans to be made.
"Ratchet and Clank? Jak and Daxter? Seriously?" Kazooie couldn't hide her rudeness even as she and Banjo met the two other sets of paired heroes. "What happened to the original dynamic duo: Banjo & Kazooie? Can no one make heroes without ripping off of us anymore?"
Megaman couldn't help but admire Samus's armor. "Nice suit," he said. "What kind of programming did you use to configure its weaponry?"
"Mr. Snake, it's an honor to see you again," Sly Cooper said, expressing the actual sentiment of respect that most of the All-Stars still regarded the soldier with. Snake was pleasantly surprised as he discovered this more and more with each reunion. Despite everything, he was still seen as a leader and a hero among them.
"You're quite sure he isn't a Pokémon, then?" Quentin ask Red as he attempted to put a hand on Spyro's head. But by the way the dragon reacted with an angry, steaming snort and said "Hands off the horns, pal!" it was clear this was one creature he wouldn't be able to summon with the Omni Ball.
"Wait a minute," Tiny Kong said as she'd been meeting Sackboy. "Aren't we missing a few people? Where's Lanky?"
As if in answer, the last four heroes arrived, calling immediate, unwanted attention to themselves. Shadow, Falco, Conker, and Lanky Kong appeared, the former two looking particularly frustrated and flustered.
"What happened?" Sonic asked his friend. "Didn't you guys go to Strangereal to find that All-Star pilot, Cipher?"
"That's exactly what we did," Shadow growled, his anger poorly concealed. "We met with their freaking Osean Federation and everything was going perfectly…until someone let the monkey off his leash and he blew up a grounded fighter jet with an orange grenade."
Lanky appeared oblivious to the conversation, but Falco took the comment very personally. "Excuse me? Since when was I appointed babysitter to the orangutan? You were supposed to be in charge of this mission; just because Lanky stuck beside me like a mosquito and then decided to wander off and bomb a butterfly that happened to land on a jet, that doesn't give you the right to lay any blame on me."
"To be fair," Conker said, casually brandishing a machine gun in one hand as unnecessarily as Prince Peasley brandished his rapier, "they weren't that happy to see us in the first place. Said something about an isolationist policy. Claimed they were done fighting other kingdoms' wars for them. Refused to even send a representative to this meeting, let alone lend a hand against Microsoft. We should probably just cruise over there sometime and shoot them all to be on the safe side."
Ignoring the rapid decline of logic at the end of Conker's statement, Sonic tried to quell Shadow's and Falco's animosity. "It's all right; I think we've got more than enough help from the rest of Sony as it is. If Strangereal wants to stay out of it, that's their choice."
A few minutes later, Tikal called them together.
"Thank you all for making the sacrifice to come here," she said. I am sure you have each been made aware of our objective: to combine the Smash Brothers of Nintendo with the All-Stars of Sony and defend our lands against the looming threat of Microsoft. Now the time has come for us to decide on a plan of act—"
"Guys guys guys guys guys!"
They all turned to behold Globox, the walking blue frog, waving his arms in the air frantically, with Cream the Rabbit at his side holding the white Chaos Emerald. Evidently, they had just returned from a journey.
"Globox has the goodliest of good news!" he said, while Cream's panicked expression seemed to suggest otherwise. "Our goodly friends across the giant pond've sent a welcome party to congratulate us on our super rad gathering. Come quick and see!"
A few minutes later, after everyone had joined hands with someone holding a Chaos Emerald, the entire group of 47 heroes appeared on the cliffs of Candy Chateau, the cliffs not only resembling but actually tasting like English toffee with a layer of chocolate and boulder-sized peanuts on top. They all looked out at the ocean, where the approaching figure of a single floating vessel awaited them.
It had the appearance of a small Japanese sampan, a long wooden fishing vessel with curving edges and a low roofed section toward the back. Just a few distant figures could be seen inside. And the flag it displayed: that of a metal sphere with a crack shaped like an X, creating a glowing lime green rift.
The symbol of Microsoft.
***END OF BOOK ONE***
Author's Note: We'll take off a week extra before moving on. Book 2 will begin on November 4th, 2016!