I'll Be Your Strength

Chapter.10 – Collision

A/N: I need to also bring this fic up to the M rating now…I still don't know if it's a good or a bad thing.

*WARNING* This chapter is one of the darkest I've written. So, BEWARE and PROCEED WITH CAUTION!

Any action or behavior of the characters in this fiction is NOT to be taken as a role model. Law is insanely depressed, Kid is a borderline rapist/stalker, and Doflamingo is a creepy hostage holding fucker. Despite his name, Killer is one of the better characters.

Feeling the cold night breeze blowing through his short raven hair, Trafalgar Law felt anything but bliss. He had learned that he was merely a puppet in his little world. As small as his world may be, it was crueler than most. Some would argue that at least he had a roof on top of his head and meals to fill his stomach. But underneath the bare necessity, he felt hollow. Constantly looking, and eventually failing at trying to fill the gaping hole in his soul.

He had no reason to live.

Monotonous as it may be he was compelled to take a step through the railing. Funny, he thought. That was how he met the redhead that made his life a slight bit more unexpected. Honestly, he couldn't tell if it was good or bad. Nothing was ever simple was it? No, all his life had been very simple: 'Do what you were told to do.'

'See, simple isn't it?' Said the voice in his head.

It was then Law began to laugh.

He found his situation was in a way hilarious. No, seriously, it was somewhere between a heartbreaking drama all the teenagers would flock for and a tragic Shakespearean play. Upon remembering all the instances of his life crashing down on him, his laugh, turned shaky and tears started to roll down his tanned cheeks. Slightly confused, Law raised the pad of his fingers feeling the damp trail on his face.

Why?

He didn't feel anything at all. He wasn't sad. He just felt…empty.

Law could feel his chest heaving, and his breath still shaky trying to comprehend what was happening to him. It was just all to confusing. Why couldn't at least his feelings be just simple and predictable? He looked down on the stony pavement below his balcony. If he fell, if he jumped, would the height be enough to kill him?

Splat! Just like that. Now that was an unimaginative ending worthy of his colorless life.

Law's grip tightened around the metal bar of his balcony. He remembered all the things he had done, which wasn't all that much, although fighting aback a redheaded beast and pinning him to the ground felt incredible. It was one of those rare instances that made him felt alive, or at least having some control over something. He remembered a book he read some time ago, he couldn't remember what it was called, but he vaguely remembered one of the characters took his own life. A bullet to the head, much more exciting for what Law had in mind for his imminent demise.

'Cowardice is nothing to do with it – suicide takes considerable courage.'

That, Law agreed on.

'What's selfish is to demand another to endure an intolerable existence, just to spare families, friends, and enemies a bit of soul-searching.'

In Law's case, who on earth would care? Doflamingo? Kureha? Penguin or Sachi? Or Godforbid, Eustass fucking Kid? Seriously, people die all the time, he live in fucking hospital he saw people die every fucking day! Why would it be any difference?

'You're right, it wouldn't.'

Ha ha.

"Well, at least we agreed on something for once." Law smiled bitterly, as he noticed his head cleared of all voices and whispers. For a change, it was quiet. It was almost heavenly.

"Here goes nothing."

...

For a while, the world of Trafalgar Law feels like it had reached its end, it was turned up side down and he felt something he had never felt before. Finally free, from the shackle of his captor. At that very moment in his descend, time slowed its pace and it was as if the whole world stopped, just for him. His last performance on this cruel stage called life. Although this time not as a puppet, but as himself, Trafalgar Law, flesh and bone. The raven haired man swore that he wouldn't close his eyes as he fell, he wanted to savor it all, the light from the window, the traffic, it was the as if the city was alive, and staring at him with wide, open eyes.

You know how in those clichéd life and death situations where people see their life flashes by? Well, it was all bullshit. All he could see and enjoy was the beautiful city bidding him farewell, and not too far below, lighting up in the streetlight, shining like a beacon was a flaming red.

Kid was watching him with a bewildered expression, trying to grasp what was happening.

'Hah, You couldn't stop me this time.'

That was Law's last thought as he saw Kid running towards him in slow motion, though he doubt Kid would made it in time. In the small corner in his mind, he hoped that Kid would make it. What was it? Regret? No, at a time like this, a time where he was supposed to be free, feeling a pang of regret was far too ridiculous. Almost as ridiculous as that face Kid was making as he called out to his name.

And finally Law's body hit the ground with a loud, sickening thump followed by an inhuman scream tearing through the silence of the night.

…

He felt light.

Was he dead? It was different than what he imagined it would feel like, or rather he couldn't feel anything at all. Along with the constant ringing in his ears, all the sounds were reduced to unintelligible mumbling and roaring. Huh? Certainly, he must be in hell or something. All he could see was weird figures that shaped like boots thumping the ground, and occasional blur of reds.

"OUT OF THE WAY!" His hearing was starting to get back to him, but it was still muffled and he couldn't make out who was speaking or recognized any of the voices.

Gasping nurses, stuffs clanking and clattering down, and of course the oh-so familiar stretcher wheels rolling across the floor.

Wait, was he still alive?

"Thankfully he couldn't feel any pain right now. He's in a state of shock and his body hasn't quite registered what happened, yet."

Fuck.

"Hey, hey. You'll be alright, everything will be okay. You hear me? Stay with me!"

'Lies.'

Law blinked through his heavily lidded eyes and saw a pair of intense golden orbs staring back at him. Where had he seen those eyes before? They sure were pretty, though. Those beautiful eyes were filled with worry, and for once it made Law felt wanted, and loved.

"We need to put him under."

'No, please don't! I need to see those eyes.'

He tried to beg, but no words came out of his throat. All he could manage was pitiful sound of gagging and guttural noises as he sobbed.

'PLEASE!'

Law felt his vision dimmed as the darkness took away his light, and once more he was trapped in the familiar void of anesthetic.

"Law? LAW!"

"Let them do their job, Kid!"

Murderous rage and breakdowns were an everyday occurrence in the ER, and what Kid would usually laughed at in those drama-filled nonsense on TV was entirely too contradictory to what he felt as of now. He just saw a person he knew took the leap for death, in front of his eyes. The red head still couldn't believe what just happened. It was all a blur of frantic screaming for help and people rushing about. The worst part was what he saw after Law hit the ground. The image of Law's body was imprinted in his brain, the unusual angle of his limbs and the blood staining the concrete.

"Oh God, oh God…please let him be okay." Kid chanted. He stood in the middle of the ER, petrified as he saw the hospital staffs took Law away into the operating room.

Kid had not expected that it would actually happen. He hadn't known Law for so long. Heck, he hadn't known the man at all! And to think that he had once challenged Law to jump down the building. It was unimaginable what would have happened if Law did jump that night.

Kid's heart was beating frantically against his ribs, and he would've stood there waiting for Law to return if Killer hadn't dragged him to the nearest chair. Then a nurse started to fuss over the black eye the blond had given him not thirty minutes ago. Kid had almost forgotten about that. Law was dying, and Kid couldn't take his mind off of the gruesome image of his limp body. Why would he ever care about Law? Was it because he got a hot piece of ass? Damn, as he said, he didn't even know the guy! It shouldn't have impacted him so much. Maybe he just got a soft spot for the guy.

Shell-shocked, Kid drowned out all the voices surrounding him and he just sat there waiting, worrying for the man he barely knew.

Meanwhile, up in the administrative part of the hospital wings, a certain office had been ransacked upon the news of Law's attempted suicide. Papers and files thrown all over the floor in a fit of rage. Smashing and crashing sounds echoed through the halls, warding away anyone who came close. Doflamingo couldn't contain his wrath, to think that Law, his Law would commit such a despicable act. He roared as he shattered the last remaining glass encased certificates and trophies in his fit.

Standing not so far from the wreck, was Gladius who had just delivered the dreadful report. Frankly, he couldn't care less and even would've preferred if Law had died, it was simply his duty to serve Doflamingo, and the boy was a royal pain in the ass. Doflamingo's attachment to the boy was something Gladius failed to comprehend, but he was in no place to scold his boss.

Doflamingo hunched over his desk, one of the few pieces of furniture that was still in a respectable condition, and turned to his underling.

"How is he?" He asked in a voice that was unfit for human.

"In the OR. I couldn't tell how long the surgery is gonna be and he's still in critical condition."

Doflamingo growled. One wouldn't have thought that a person would be able to look menacing while wearing a pink feathered coat, but Doflamingo took it to a whole new level.

"Call Vergo."

Without a word, Gladius took his leave and pondered about what Doflamingo might had in store for Law. Trying to take his own life was a foolish move for the brat. Especially when that life was not his to take.

...

To Be Continued

A/N: I'm sorry. I'm so, so, so, sorry! I promise the next chapter won't be as dark, to soothe your pain (or not?)

Disclaimer: the book that Law was referring to was Cloud Atlas by David Mitchell.