"Thank you all for coming here tonight. You've all made it fairly obvious that you've been waiting for this statement while I've been trying to prolong it. But here we are. So here it is. During the second semester of my freshman year at UVA I realized that a man was following me. Being the person that I am, I thought nothing of it. That is until it happened repeatedly after my one class. It first began that he would just follow me until we got outside of the building, but it soon became an issue once he followed me nearly all the way to Henry's apartment. I began to worry and told Henry after three weeks of it escalating and we immediately got the campus security involved," Elizabeth said as she turned around to look at Henry. "Of course my own personal body guard over here insisted that I get a restraining order but I opted out of that, having faith that the university was going to do everything in their power to ensure my safety. And they did. In no time, Jacob Peterson backed off once the campus had warned him and I felt like myself again. Although Henry would have to disagree, I felt safe for the first time in weeks. It wasn't until one afternoon whenever I decided to walk back to my dorm room by myself that my safety was questioned." Elizabeth looked back at Henry and the children again, all giving her encouraging smiles for what was going to be the hardest part of her speech. The part where she was most vulnerable.

"Henry insisted that he would only be 15 minutes longer, but I assured him I was fine and I would see him after his class. I think it took every bone in his body to tell me 'Fine. Go ahead and I'll meet you at your dorm as soon as I'm finished.' So I walked back by myself although there were plenty of people around. The dorms were already beginning to quiet down as people were leaving for the weekend. I took notice of my surroundings the entire time making sure Mr. Peterson was nowhere to be seen. And he wasn't. So I walked into my dorm room and unloaded my backpack to be surprised with a knock at the door not but ten minutes later." Elizabeth stopped to clear her throat as she was preparing to expose what could be considered one of the worst nights of her life.

"I thought it was Henry. Maybe he had gotten out of class earlier than expected. Without thinking I opened the door a..and…Jacob was standing there. I tried to shut the door but he allowed himself to come in with force. Luckily for me he failed to shut the door all the way, which allowed Henry to swoop in and save the day. He backed me up against my desk and yelled at me, spit on me, and held by arms down to the point where I had fingerprint size bruises on my forearms for weeks. I couldn't speak. I froze not sure what to do. It wasn't until Henry came in did he finally let go of me so that I could start processing what had happened. I won't go into details about what happened after Henry came in, but needless to say a restraining order was put into place effectively immediately. Before eight weeks ago we thought he was no longer a threat but it is clear that he still is to this day. I thank you all for your patience, kindness, and graciousness that you all have bestowed upon myself and my family. Thank you all and have a blessed evening."

**MS**

With that last statement Elizabeth left the room along with her kids in front of her and her husband right beside her. It wasn't until she reached her office that the immense amount of weight that lied within that speech hit her.

"You did great, Mom!" Alison said as she wrapped her mom up in a hug.

"Yeah Mom, we're really proud of you," Stevie said as her and Jason joined in. But instead of reciprocating the hug, Elizabeth just stood there. Frozen in time, just as she did years ago.

"Babe?" Henry asked in a worried tone. The kids looked up at their mother whose face was pale. And within a second her breathing became labored and the kids immediately broke away from their mother. She reached for her chest and gasped for air as she looked around the room aimlessly begging for help.

"Dad, what's wrong with mom?" Alison asked her father as tears welled up in her eyes.

"Babe, I'm right here," Henry said as he rushed over to his wife. "Elizabeth it's okay, I need you to breathe for me. In 1,2,3. Out 1,2,3. C'mon you can do it." He slowly helped his wife sit on the ground and place her head in between her knees. "Stevie," he said looking at his oldest, "go ask Blake where mom's purse is and bring it to me, okay?" Stevie ran out of the room yelling desperately for Blake. What actually took seconds seemed like minutes but she and Blake soon returned with the bag in hand.

"Dr. McCord is the Secretary okay?" he asked in a worried tone. Elizabeth's breathing was still labored but it was beginning to become under control.

"I need you to get the pill bottle out of her purse. It has her anti-anxiety pills in it. Get me one out and I need a glass of water," Henry stated and Blake did exactly as he was told. He handed the pill to Henry and poured her a glass of water. "Elizabeth I need you to take this for me," he said while rubbing his wife's back.

"No," she managed to choke out as she lifted her head from between knees. "Henry I'm fine." She wiped the tears away from her cheek as she took the next few seconds to finally get her breathing back to normal. She looked across the room and saw the three worried expressions from her three children staring back at her.

"Mom, are you okay?" Jason asked as he saw both of his sisters tears streaming down their cheeks.

"Yes," she said quietly while looking at Henry and then at the kids. "Everything is going to be okay." But as they all sat there in silence watching their unbreakable mother wipe away the silent tears that fell from her eyes, their tough father crumble as he helplessly watched their mother, they all knew that nothing was fine, and it hadn't been for quite sometime.

**MS**

Elizabeth woke up her in bed the next morning, truly unsure of how she ended up there after what had happened in the office the night before. The only thing she was able to remember was getting into the motorcade sometime after the anxiety attack and listening to the deafening silence in the car. Her kids to worried to speak and her husband to scared to breathe the wrong breath. She vaguely remembers Henry carrying her into the house and laying her on their bed, helping her change into something more comfortable to sleep in. She looked over at the clock and noticed it was 10:30.

"Crap," she mumbled as she threw the covers off of her. No matter how much sleep she had gotten the night before, the draining effects of the anxiety attack were still taking a toll on her body. She opened the bathroom door to find Henry staring blankly into the mirror, lost in his own little world.

"What are you doing out of bed?" he asked her snapping back into reality.

"I need to go into the office. I told Blake yesterday that I was coming in early so I could leave before dinner. But now it doesn't look like that's going to happen," she answered. "Why didn't you wake me up?"

"Well number one, it's Saturday and you normally don't go in on Saturday mornings unless its an emergency. And two I called Blake this morning and told him that you wouldn't be in today if anything were to pop up and to have the deputy Secretary handle it," he responded as he splashed water on his face.

"You did what?!" she practically yelled. "Henry you cannot control when I go into the office. That isn't your job."

"No it's not but it is my job to protect you, and after what happened last night, mind you in front of the kids, I think it's safe to say you should stay home," he spat back, irritated and annoyed. Elizabeth looked down at her feet as she realized what Henry had insinuated. Did he think that she meant to have an anxiety attack? "Look Babe, the kids are worried about you and so am I. It wasn't easy what you did last night so I thought a day or two off before you got back into the thick of things would be nice. But if you want to go into the office, you know there's no way that I can stop you." He leaned in and softly pecked her on the lips and headed for the bathroom door.

"Henry," she said stopping him in his tracks and making him turn around, "thank you for calling in for me." He flashed her a smile and went into the bedroom and left her to shower. She let the hot water run off her body staying in there for longer than she anticipated. Her fingers continuously ran over the long scar on her chest, the scar that reminded her of all the pain she had caused for her family. The steam helped clear her head and gave her time to think about everything that had gone on in the last twenty four hours. She didn't dare turn on the television at all, knowing that her face and speech would be plastered on every single news cycle. She stepped out of the shower and dried off putting on a white t-shirt with a long beige cardigan and a pair of leggings. With her hair wrapped up in a towel she went to sit on her bed and read through just a couple of reports she brought home with her.

"Mom, do you have a second?" Alison asked with a soft knock on the door.

"Sure Noodle, come on in," she said as she patted the spot on the bed next to her. She shut the binders and dropped them on the floor. Alison climbed onto the bed and immediately snuggled into her mom's embrace just as she did when she was younger. They sat their in silence for a minute as Elizabeth took her in, resting her head on top of her daughters just as she's done so many times before.

"Mom," Alison managed to say, "are you okay?" Elizabeth sat there not sure how to respond. Was she really okay? Heck she didn't know.

"I'm going to be fine, Noodle. I promise," she stated as she placed a kiss on top of her head. Alison sat up so that she would be face to face with her mother.

"I know you're going to be fine, mom. You always are. You are one of the strongest people that I know. But I'm asking are you okay now? Last night in your office, I was really scared. I didn't know what to do. I felt like I caused your panic attack," she said as she hung her head low. Elizabeth's heart broke as she listened to her daughter.

"Noodle of course you didn't cause my panic attack," she stated as she grabbed her daughters hand and squeezed it tight. "It's just hard right now. I never imagined having to tell the entire world my secret past that I had and I never wanted to. But I had to and it's over. It may take me a little while to get back to the person I was before…you know. But I promise that no matter what, I'm still the same mom that you know. And I'm not going anywhere." She leaned forward and enveloped her now crying daughter in her arms. Tears streamed down her face too and she closed her eyes, hoping that it would stop the tears. Alison's breathing began to slow and Elizabeth finally opened her eyes and to her surprise, Henry was standing in the doorway with the other two children watching as tears fell from their eyes too. Elizabeth nodded her head and the three of them joined her and Alison on the bed. And for the first time in weeks, she had felt safe.

**MS**

"I'm sorry about last night," Elizabeth told Henry as they were lying in bed in the evening. She had been trying to find a way to apologize to him for scaring him and the kids but words didn't seem to be her best friend right now.

"Nothing to be sorry for," he said as he wrapped his arms around her and pulled her in close. He kissed the crown of her head and breathed in the scent of her hair.

"I didn't mean to scare you or the kids. I just…just…couldn't hold it in anymore I guess," she said as silent tears streamed down her cheeks. "We've been living in this constant state of fear for the past two months and I felt this overwhelming sense of guilt come over me. Because this is all fault."

"Babe, don't think like that. You're safe, the kids are safe, I'm safe, we're all okay. It's going to be alright. We'll get through it," he reassured her only wrapping her tighter in his arms.

"I can't do it anymore, Henry," she mumbled into his arm. "I don't know if I want to be Secretary of State anymore."

***I hope you all enjoyed this chapter! I've been trying to write every now and again but it always takes me awhile to make something that's worth publishing. Your reviews always make me smile. Thank you so much for sticking around. xoxo***