Jonny had entered the canteen whilst Jac and Jil were having their godmother conversation, he'd spotted them immediately, Jac's fiery auburn hair standing out like a beacon, but he also sensed that he shouldn't interrupt their discussion. Anyway, he reasoned, interrupting them would do him no good – he needed to speak to Jil on her own. How he was going to achieve this he hadn't really thought about – for once he was a man without a plan, he just knew that he had to find out what Jil had meant. He wasn't even sure why he was here really, he knew she'd be with Jac now and as such unable to talk to him, but he couldn't help himself. Just staying on the ward doing nothing, waiting, just wasn't an option, some instinct to do something, anything (however pointless it seemed) had taken over him. And so here he was, spying on his girlfriend and her best friend, waiting to do something, although he had no idea what, or how to achieve it - it would have been funny if it wasn't so damn important to him! He realised that if he wasn't careful Jac and/or Jil would look around and see him so he retreated to a table towards the back of the canteen and sat down, watching and waiting.

A few minutes later his patience was rewarded – Jac got up and rejoined the fairly lengthy queue at the canteen counter – Jonny reckoned that, with a fair wind and the usual faffing over change at the tills, he had at least five minutes to play with. So he seized the opportunity and quickly walked over to Jil's table, sitting in the seat Jac had vacated moments before. Jil looked up and was obviously puzzled to see him, saying, "Ohh, if you're looking for Jac she's ju…

Jonny, who knew time was of the essence, interrupted her, "No, no – it's you I'm after actually?"

"Oh…OK?" Jil said, uncertainly."Erm… what can I do for you then?"

"Well, erm," Jonny hesitated, he hadn't actually planned what he was going to say. "Erm, well I was erm." He could see Jil's face – the expression on it had changed from one of puzzlement to one of concern, possibly even worry, and he could see that she was about to turn around and look for Jac. 'Get a grip' he thought to himself. "I was wondering," he began, and seeing that Jil's attention had been attracted back to him continued, "I was wondering if I'd said anything to upset you in the staff room earlier. It's just I got the feeling you were a bit annoyed with me about something, and I couldn't figure out what it was and I'd hate you to have the wrong impression of me, because I'd really like you to like me. I mean you don't dislike me do you?" he finished, the concern showing through in his voice.

"Well, I don't think I really know you well enough to say yet" Jil answered, "but no, I wouldn't say I dislike you, not at all. I'm not like Jac on that score – I tend to like to spend some time with people before I decide if I like them or not. Probably something to do with my job – I have to be non-judgemental at work, and I suppose it spills over into my real life too. But can I ask why you thought that?"

"it's just that, before Jac came into the staffroom earlier, I got the impression you were telling me off about something. That somehow I don't know, you felt like I'd let you down or something" Jonny explained.

"Oh yes," Jil said remembering, "about you not knowing how extraordinary Jac is." Jonny nodded, "well I didn't mean it to sound like I was telling you off – I was just surprised that's all, that you don't seem to know it – when it's just so obvious to me."

"But I do," Jonny countered "I really do know how amazing she is!"

"Mmm..maybe.." Jil said doubtfully.

"You don't sound convinced" Jonny surmised.

"To be truthful – I'm not." Jil replied. "I mean, don't get me wrong, I'm sure you think you know how wonderful she is, but I doubt you really do. And that's probably got very little to do with you – Jac's hardly an open book and I don't suppose she's been that forthcoming. But it's like you're not completely sure that all the, what was it you called it…oh yeah 'hard work' it takes to get close to her is worth it, whereas I absolutely know that it is, you see."

"Well if that's true," Jonny answered, "and I'm not saying it is" he added hurriedly. "But let's just say, for the sake of argument that I don't know how wonderful Jac is and you do, and you think I need to, then, obviously the solution is for you to tell me how you know Jac is so amazing. Yes?"

"Yes" Jil said simply, "that would be the perfect solution. But" and she saw Jonny's face fall as she uttered that dreaded word, "much as I would LOVE to tell you all about Jac's wonderfulness, I can't – sorry"

"But….I don't understand," Jonny began "you think I should know but you won't tell me, how does that work?"

"I'm so sorry" Jil said meaning it, "but I don't know how much you know about Jac already, and I can't risk telling you something she wouldn't want you to know. You know when I said about being the graveyard of her secrets, I really wasn't joking – one of the things that's kept our friendship going is my ability to keep her secrets, secret. You know how important privacy is to her, right?" Jonny nodded. "Well, so do I and that's why I can't, I won't, risk upsetting her – you do understand?" she asked, searching for confirmation, "she's my best friend, and I wouldn't want to hurt her, not for anything, you do see?"

"I suppose so," Jonny reluctantly agreed, "but" he continued, "it might not hurt her- it might help, if I understood her better, it might make us stronger, which has got to be a good thing, right?"

"But I don't think she'd see it that way," Jil said, "if I told you anything she'd rather you didn't know, no matter why I did it or what the consequences of that were, she'd still see it as a betrayal of trust. And that's something we just don't do to each other! I'm sorry, really I am" she concluded, "but that's just how Jac and I work."'

"So, there's nothing you can do, nothing you can tell me?" Jonny asked dejectedly.

Jil shook her head, "Except" she said softly, "that, like I said before, with Jac the hard work REALLY is worth it" She reached over and gave Jonny's hand a gentle squeeze, and smiled at him, "it really, really is!"

Jonny didn't know what to think, part of him wanted to make Jil tell him what she knew somehow, although he could tell that probably only the worst form of torture would get her to divulge anything; part of him was trying to think of ways he could try to find out for himself how wonderful Jac was, he'd never been afraid of a bit of hard work after all; and part of him was just glad that Jac had such a good friend. He and Jil sat in companionable silence for a little while before Jonny suddenly remembered whose seat he had filled. He looked up anxiously, searching for Jac, not for the first time he was grateful for her fiery hair, which always made her easy to spot – she was just paying, waiting for her change. He'd better go – he didn't feel up to withstanding one of her interrogations at the moment, he had so much to think about, he wouldn't be able to put up any sort of defence. "I've got to go" he said to Jil, standing up hurriedly, Jac had just turned away from the cashier and was heading back towards the table. He realised she'd spotted him and could see the questioning look on her face – he had to get out of here, fast. "I'll see you later" he said to Jil, turning away and walking off just as Jac reached the table.

"What was he doing here?" Jac asked suspiciously, putting down the Double Decker she'd just bought in front of her friend.

"He thought he'd upset me – he was trying to clear the air" Jil answered.

"He hasn't has he?" Jac said, looking furiously after Jonny, who was just disappearing through the canteen's swing doors.

"No, no, he didn't" Jil rushed to reassure her friend, "I was just a bit surprised that he didn't seem to realise how wonderful you are, that's all. And he just wanted to know how it is that you're so amazing, that's all."

"And... what did you tell him?"

"That I couldn't say anything because of my vow of silence when it comes to you and your life." Jil replied. "Even though I'd have loved to be able to tell him how and why you're so wonderful."

"You should do it then" Jac said, "if it'd make you happy. After all what harm can a two minute conversation do?"

"Two minutes!" Jil said incredulously, "you really have no idea do you?" She continued, "Are you sure? You'd be happy for me to tell Jonny how amazing you are?"

"Why not?" Jac replied, "It might be nice to have someone in the hospital, other than Sacha, who thinks I'm even human, let alone amazing. Go for it!"

"And I can tell him anything?" Jil asked

"Yep, he'll have heard all the rumours about me and my past anyway so it's probably good that he'll hear the truth from someone who's sympathetic to me, on my side if you know what I mean"

"And you're sure there's nothing you want me to miss out," Jil asked again – she had to be sure.

"No." Jac said definitely. "If you want to tell Jonny how wonderful I am then you should do it, and you can tell him everything."

"Ok then" Jil said, "if you're sure?" Jac nodded. "In that case I might have to write a list – wouldn't want to miss anything about your fabulousness out. Ooh, talking about lists hadn't we better be getting back – didn't you say yours started at 2 o'clock"

"Well yes, but what about your chocolate?" Jac asked.

"It's OK – I can eat and walk" Jil replied, "I'd hate to make you late." And so saying she stood up, picked up the Double Decker, and taking Jac's arm in hers they walked out of the canteen.