A/N: This is Eric's POV, but it overlaps the timeline we already know. That means he remembers things that Sookie didn't tell us or were not important to her… or she simply didn't notice but he did. And, of course, the reverse is true. This is the chapter that truly gives the story its "Romance" label.
I know these updates are coming fast and furious… As y'all know most of this is already written and just needed some editing. Depending on how much editing it needed, that's how fast I can upload it… plus, of course, my other baby needs some TLC once in a while.
Chapter 10 – The Universe in my Arms
I watched Sookie relaxing more and more every second, her legs wrapped around me. Her blond hair looked wild floating in the water, undulating around her beautiful face. Her big blue eyes were staring up at the sky, and a little smile had started to form on her lips. She was so lovely. Everything about her was so soft. It scared me that she had been so upset when she saw me upset. Actually, she had looked scared, as if I would lash out at her. As if I ever could hurt her. She had been so trusting with me, from the beginning. This very nature of hers had given her the guilt that plagued her after her husband's death. It maybe even gave her the hope that her thankless marriage would somehow improve if only she held on long enough. What a way to betray this beautiful woman's trust. I never could.
She was mine. She had shown me and told me so many times that she belonged to me. My life was going to hurt her, and I felt I would go mad with rage. Everything that usually conspired against me was starting to turn on her instead. I would have to protect her. No one else had ever done the job properly. She was mine to protect now. And she would be mine: I would make her my wife. Of that much I was sure. My Sookie. She was the one.
I studied her features as she closed her eyes, and I couldn't help but touch her. Her small frame belied her true strength, as her legs wrapped around me in a vise, as they'd done a so many times already. I ran my hands from her ribs to her waist, noticing the way her skin always reacted: she turned warmer, amazing. I was always amazed that she let me touch her at all, more so that my touch would be welcomed, craved. I ran a finger from her neck, tracing the contours of her breasts, and immediately her body seemed to sing to me. Just like her own singing, it was pure and unexpected.
I lifted her out of the water, her legs still around me. Her eyes searched mine like they always did, for the meaning of my actions. She could see so much within me. I kissed her slowly at first, just taking in her sweet scent, her breath, the feel of my tongue on her smooth lips, and then the frenzy began. Would I be able to make it to the house? Would anyone see us if we stayed here? I suddenly didn't care. I pulled on one of the strings of her bottom and entered her. She held on to my neck, still kissing me back and moaning softly. I was again overwhelmed by the fact that she let me do that to her, take her and make her mine over and over. I held her tight against me. The love and the lust I felt for her were all I needed in this world.
"Eric," she whispered. I knew what she meant at once. She wasn't calling my name to make me take notice. She was only telling me that I was the source of her physical pleasure. If we had been anywhere else but here, she would have practically screamed it. The knowledge of this, the memory of all our nights and days together, the countless times I had taken her, made her mine as I was hers, suddenly became too much to bear. I spilled inside her, letting the feeling take me. All I had left in me was her name. "Sookie," I groaned in her ear. We kept holding each other for a long time, until she giggled and pulled away enough to examine my face.
She ran her hand down my cheek, smoothing my beard. Even this new development in my features didn't seem to bother her. She still looked at me with the same wonder in her eyes.
"I love you," she said simply, looking into my eyes.
"I love you too, my beautiful girl," I told her, rearranging a lock of her hair. I left my hand on her neck, where I could still feel her heart beating a little faster than normal. I wanted to ask her to marry me, be my family, right here, right now. I held my tongue. It had been a very stressful day. There was no need to add more to this particular mix. I would ask her properly, the way she deserved, with a ring in hand… and only when I was feeling like I wouldn't lose her. Right now that possibility was all too real.
"I'll make everything alright. Please trust me," I said to her. I wanted to reassure her.
"I know, honey," she said to me softly. She held me closer to her and ducked her head under my chin, to rest on my chest. I knew she would trust me no matter what. It was her nature.
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I looked to my left, curious to see who my neighbor was. I hadn't been expecting anybody in this neighborhood to arrive home after nine or ten in the evening, and it was nearly three in the morning. When I saw the figure of a young woman, walking fast from her car to the house, I half expected it would be the house's owner's daughter or lover. What else would explain that particular vision? And she looked stunning: wild blond hair, tight pants and top showing off all her curves. She looked small from where I stood. I was almost shocked still. Only when she went inside her house was I able to move again. Had she seen me? She must have. Would she be able to tell who I was in the dark? Probably not.
The next day I woke up unusually late. I was still used to West Coast time. It was nearly ten in the morning. I peered from my front window to the house where I'd seen the beautiful woman. Her car was still there, but there didn't seem to be any movement. Curiosity got the best of me, and I found myself looking every so often. At one point her car disappeared from her driveway. I almost kicked myself for missing her departure. I had been emptying boxes all day. It was the most boring task. I stopped happily when I heard her car return. I peered through my window again and was taken aback by the sight of the same woman: she was so young. She must have been younger than me by a couple of years. Her presence was incongruous with the neighborhood. Her perfectly tanned skin was now covered in more modest clothes: a pair of jeans and a too-big t-shirt. As she made her way back and forth from her garden, I could see her face: big eyes, pretty lips, the blond hair was held back into a loose ponytail. I didn't see her anymore from where I was standing, but I knew she was working in front of her house.
It was quite sudden. At first I didn't hear anything at all, and suddenly I heard the sound of a shovel being abused. My gentlemanly ways got the best of me (not to mention my raging curiosity), and I stepped outside to see what exactly she was doing. I had enough gardening experience to help her, if she needed help. She was certainly trying to hack her garden to pieces, yet succeeding very little. I wondered what was wrong… I crept closer. A loud roar (a growl) issued from her, along with a sob. I walked to her swiftly and startled her. She fell. I felt responsible and quickly scooped her up back onto her feet. Her big light blue eyes took me in, a little confused at first. Then the realization of who I was dawned on her the more she heard me talk, and her confusion turned to wonder. It was just as brilliant to see her up close. She was beautiful. My heart ached that her blue eyes were tinged with red because she was crying, and all I wanted to know was what had made her cry, so that I could make it better. She dirtied her face in an effort to hide her tears from me. Before I even knew her name, this beautiful woman had mesmerized me beyond what I thought I was capable of feeling. She was so trusting. She even let me clean her face and help her with her garden.
She invited me into her home. Her sweet voice was soothing, like a balm for my broken heart. I looked around, trying to see if she lived alone or with a husband. She seemed to have just moved in as well, not because there were boxes to unpack, but because there was nothing on the walls of her house. When she told me her story, I understood everything: why she lived next to her parents, and why she had been able to open up to me. We were kindred spirits. I told her my story too, and her reaction was one of genuine sadness for me. But her expression went from sadness to guilt. I could tell she felt guilty about something. I assumed it was because she'd had to make a very difficult decision when she took her husband off the machines that kept him alive.
Sookie was getting into me. She was my ray of sunshine in the dreary world I had built for myself over the past two years. Even though we shared the same pain, she was easy to make smile. I found myself smiling at her, if only because her expressions were so interesting and unexpected. Once I smiled at her, she would smile right back. It was lovely, that I had that effect on her. She was also quite smart and witty, whenever I was able to get her to speak. She was mostly shy around me. That, in and of itself, endeared her to me. Sookie didn't need to voice her opinions at every turn, and she seemed to intuitively know when I needed comfort. She also knew what to say, what would comfort me. I wanted to be her comfort too.
When she agreed to show me the nursery, I almost jumped for joy. I was going to have her all to myself for a period of time. And the excuse I had come up with was as good as gold. I was so nervous, that I drove slower than usual. My stomach kept making little flips whenever she moved in her seat. She never noticed the effect she had on me. I kept looking at her sideways whenever I could, just to explore her: her hands fluttered when her words failed. She wore a watch with a blue face on her left wrist, and tiny golden hoop earrings. On her neck was a substantial gold chain. I had noticed it the day before. It seemed to be a part of her.
"That is a beautiful necklace," I commented, wondering about it. It could have been a gift from her husband, and that made me a little jealous. She wasn't wearing her wedding rings, but maybe she kept him close some other way.
"Thank you. My parents gave it to me for my 16th birthday," she explained, barely noticing how her hand had lightly touched it, caressed it even. The necklace had meaning for her, and I finally understood. Sookie was exceptionally close to her family. This necklace was her way to keep her family close. There was no need to be jealous, I told myself. I couldn't understand why I had felt that way to begin with. She wasn't mine.
At the nursery she wandered like a vision in a rainforest. It didn't matter that she was wearing jeans and a simple shirt. She would have looked lovely in a potato sack. The sun caught in her hair, sending sparkles through the strands, a halo around her beautiful face. When she stood next to a hibiscus, her slender finger stroking a petal, I thought I would die to engrave that picture in my memory. It wasn't because she was standing next to a pretty plant. It was because her face had softened into an expression of wonder so exquisite my heart ached to touch her. She looked like a painting.
I was excited at the prospect that I would have something else to show her the next day, another excuse to see her. My sailboat arrived right on time, and the moment I had received it and signed for its delivery, I half ran to Sookie's house. I could faintly hear music coming from inside her house. As I approached, I stopped in my tracks, right outside her door. Above the music, I could hear her singing. Her voice rang like a bell. I could tell she had a good set of lungs, as loud as she sang. She was loud, and just beautiful. She could have given any diva a run for her money. I kept a tally of all the beautiful things that made up this breathtaking person, including the things that one could not see, like her compassion, and her trusting nature. She had already shown me compassion the day before, during our trip back home from the nursery. Not only had she shown compassion, she had shown me how perceptive she was: more to add to my tally.
When Sookie accepted, quite good-naturedly, to go see my sailboat with me, I couldn't help it anymore. Her pull was like gravity, and I had to touch her. I took her hands in mine as I helped her into the boat, and I didn't want to let her go. I had to do something about these feelings I had for her. I had to know if she wanted me too. I had to remind myself that maybe she wasn't ready yet. After all, she had been alone for a shorter time than me. But once again (as I found myself confiding in her, and as she was able to perceive much more than what I'd said), I was astonished at how much she seemed to understand, and at how much her words of comfort soothed my battered heart. I fell in love, totally and unconditionally, the minute she touched my hand of her own volition. Her touch was soft, hesitant, and unimaginably warm in more ways than physical. I felt my stomach make a quick flip flop of nervousness, and my heart soar.
Later, when I had Sookie all to myself and she was calmly watching my favorite movie, I contemplated my next move. Would I be able to slowly nurture the relationship, be patient, and hope that she was interested in me too? Somehow I couldn't see myself being patient. The way I was feeling about her, physically and mentally: I wanted her badly. I felt so selfish. But if she liked me too, then it wouldn't be selfish at all. Sometimes I caught glimpses of something in her eyes, something she was trying very hard to keep hidden. The problem with that was that it kept me wondering whether she wanted me, or was intimidated by me, or just plain surprised at my presence. It was something. I wished to figure it out.
Sookie seemed completely absorbed in the movie, enjoying it as much as I enjoyed it. I hadn't been able to pay attention at all, thinking of the best way to approach her. I took her hand and kissed the soft skin over her knuckles, turned it around and kissed her wrist. Her face took on that unbearably beautiful expression of wonder I had seen the day before, and I couldn't help but touch her now. I hugged her to me, and it was like finding home. I hadn't understood the pull of another human being until that moment. I had acted it out a million times or more, I thought I'd had a home with my wife, but it all paled in comparison to having Sookie in my arms, and me being in hers. All the feelings that surged through me as I hugged her paled in comparison to the realization that she was hugging me back. I couldn't believe how amazingly lucky I had gotten: to have found her so suddenly, when I wasn't even looking.
When I finally gathered the courage to kiss her soft lips, she pulled away, and it almost broke my heart. I shouldn't have assumed that kissing was alright. In truth, I hadn't assumed anything at all. I had barely even formed the thought when my lips met hers. But she gave me permission to kiss her when I asked, and she kissed me back. I was anxious to make her mine, but I knew that would have to wait. For now I treasured this kiss: her soft lips, the taste of her tongue, her sweet breath, the feel of her hands on me as she explored me, as I explored her. That's when I first noticed what my touch would do to her. Her body reacted by turning warmer under my touch: one second I touched the cool skin on the back of her arms, the next they were blazing hot. Her movements would match mine, in harmony, like she was singing but with her body. Her body was singing to me, from her eager lips to the leg that she had suddenly wrapped around mine so she could pull me closer. If this is how she felt about me when we were kissing, I wondered what it would be like to make love.
We hugged for a very long time. I had to calm down a little. As I rubbed her back, I could feel that her heart was hammering against her insides, just like mine was. I was sure she could hear mine, but I didn't care. I was past hiding what I felt for her. Sookie sighed in my arms, an echo of what I was feeling at the same time.
I suddenly remembered I had been invited to dinner at her family's house. I wanted, more than anything else, to make her happy. Her family was her life, and as much as I wanted to keep her for myself here in my house, I wanted to take her back to her family that much more. I could tell she needed that. She needed the comfort, and since I wanted to comfort her, I made a point of being early for dinner.
Sookie's family was kind. I could tell where she had gotten some of her shyness, but also some of her wit and wisdom. Her mom, Charlie, had the same color blue eyes as Sookie, and they were dancing with joy at seeing us together. Her dad, Donnie, was a quieter person. But he could not keep from practically staring at his daughter's transformation. Neither could her brother, Jason. I guessed Sookie had been a very sad person for a very long time. Charlie had dared to ask about my work, something that Sookie either found boring, or else couldn't bring herself to ask me. One quick glance at her as I was answering one of Charlie's questions told me it wasn't boring to her. Sookie was truly interested in my answers. This buoyed me to continue answering any and all questions thrown at me. It was obvious that Sookie's apparent lack of eloquent speech was simply a result of shyness, not of caring.
I found myself so happy in her family's company (and in Sookie's company too) that I became physically hungry. I'd heard of this before: people who fell in love and started eating more. They became fat with happiness. I had three helpings of everything during dinner (fueled in part by Charlie's approving smile), and I would have eaten cake forever for dessert if there hadn't been a threat of a thunderstorm. I didn't want to be trapped at Charlie and Donnie's, even though I had enjoyed my time with them. I wanted to be trapped somewhere alone with Sookie. I wanted to kiss her again, touch her, smell her, taste her. Now the only hunger that needed satiety was the one I felt for her.
I walked slowly, swollen with food and unable to end the time I spent with Sookie. We kissed goodbye at her doorstep. She hesitated at the door, and I knew it wasn't our time yet. As much as I wanted her, if I truly respected and cared for her I would go home tonight, but not before securing a promise from her to spend the next day with me.
It was a pleasure to cook for her. It felt like I was taking care of her. Per usual, she surprised me with her smarts, asking me what I was cooking for breakfast in perfect, if accented, French. Later I confessed to her that I hadn't played the piano in a long time, and she understood immediately, looking chagrined at the fact that she had asked me to play for her. What better time to start playing again? What better person to have for an audience?
Our very first argument happened as a result of her thoughtfulness. It wasn't even an argument. She said she would drive us to the beach so my car wouldn't get dirty. I disagreed. She was stubborn. What an unexpected and pleasant surprise to discover that my kisses disarmed her. I indulged in the pleasure of her lips, persuading her to let me be the one to drive simply by doing what I had replayed in my mind over and over the night before. She yielded to me. Sookie let me win by a kiss, and I drove us to the beach in my car.
If I had thought I'd won the battle, I had completely lost the war. The minute she took off her dress and stood in only her bathing suit, all I could think about is how she had me completely at her mercy. It wasn't even the sexiest suit, but all I could see was the beautiful silhouette formed by her full breasts, her thin waist, her supple hips, beautiful tanned legs. I ached to touch her, and took the opportunity to put sunscreen on her back, marveling again at how her skin warmed under my hands. She returned the favor, and I couldn't get enough of the feel of her tentative touch on my skin. I asked for more. Sookie's small hands caressed my chest as she spread the sunscreen. I hadn't counted on her touch on my nipples. The sudden need that welled within me, just because of that simple touch, was a raging animal. I raised my hand with every intention of touching her breast, laying it bare and kissing it in the middle of the beach, but I stopped myself. I knew I could spend a day with her, getting to know her in every way without touching her. I wanted to know her. Obviously I couldn't mar my best intentions by giving in to my desires.
Sookie was a siren. She turned out to be a strong swimmer, much stronger than I thought. I let her win at every turn, although it was close. She dared open her eyes under the salty water, so she had the advantage for sure. Later we lied under the sun after lunch, and she fell asleep. I was content to simply guard her sleep. I knew she was still having nightmares, and I wondered about that. What was it that was giving her such terrors? She had said it was an unhealthy reason, but chose not to go into detail and I respected that. I didn't pry, but I was curious as hell.
We ordered dinner to take to her house and eat there, since we were hungry but too dirty to linger at the diner she preferred. I stared at her every chance I got, wishing I were a piece of sauerkraut from her sandwich so I could either enter her mouth or land on her chest. She was a messy eater, and not embarrassed, or else she felt at ease with me, enough to care very little about the mess she was making of her food.
I only left her house so I could take a shower, with every intention of coming back and watching a movie with her. As soon as the warm water hit me, all I could think of was Sookie's touch on my chest, her beautiful body, her wet hair clinging to her soft neck as she emerged from the water. I became hard with want. I let my hand tease my erection, imagining my fingers were hers. When I closed my eyes all I could see were her hips swaying as she walked to the beach, the rise of her breasts, how her nipples had hardened at the mere thought of my touch, her lips, her tongue… I made myself come with my mind full of Sookie.
At least that particular endeavor had eased the tension from the day, and I felt infinitely better able to resist her charms. When I arrived back at her house, she was still wearing her bathing suit, her hair still wild from the beach. She flushed when I asked her if she'd been busy, which she evidently had. She asked me to give her some time to take a shower. I wanted, again, to give her whatever she wanted. If she had asked for my car, my boat, my bank account number, she would have gotten them without hesitation. But she was not the kind to ask for any of that. She wanted a shower, and patience. So I patiently waited while I perused her home entertainment system.
I discovered she had a couple of my movies on her internet movie queue. I also discovered more movies featuring a different actor in the same queue. I again felt a pang of jealousy. Why was I feeling this way? That other actor had made one more movie than me the year before, therefore he had one more movie than me out for viewing, and Sookie happened to have all of them on her queue. I calmed down as curiosity took over, and I chose to watch one of mine while I waited for her. I couldn't help but be a little amused at the way I looked. I was half naked most of the time, and pale as a ghost. I wondered if Sookie had seen the movie yet, and what she'd thought of me in it. Surely, I couldn't have looked very handsome to her.
She emerged from her shower after only twenty minutes. The soft scent of her perfume reached me before she did. But when I looked at her she was wearing a mask of embarrassment. I quickly went to her. Nothing ever troubled me more than seeing her upset in any way. She finally explained that she thought I would be upset because my movies were in her movie queue. I couldn't understand this, but it didn't take me long: she must have watched this movie a few times already. I couldn't help but smile. It felt amazing: the knowledge that she had liked my work enough to watch it more than once. I pulled her with me to the sofa.
Before Sookie could sit next to me I stopped her. I had just noticed her clothes. She was wearing a shirt that was like her second skin. I could see the outline of every curve, and the subtle color difference that her bra made under the shirt. Her long pants looked a little too big on her, but even this made her curves stand out all the more. I pulled her in front of me. I wanted to find out where her scent was concentrated. I lifted her shirt so I could kiss the soft skin of her belly. She gasped. I suddenly remembered that I should not be doing this. She was a vulnerable person, not just a normal woman, but one that had been hurt tremendously. I knew what the loss had felt like to me. I was still grieving for my wife, even though I had felt like I had lost her well before her actual death.
I stopped suddenly, looking at her. Her eyes were closed, but they opened just as suddenly as I had stopped. There was hurt. I apologized for my brazenness, for wanting to touch her and be with her so badly. But she explained in her soft voice, my balm, that she didn't want me to stop kissing or touching her. Her slender fingers wound through my hair as she told me that she felt the same way about me. The hurt faded quickly and her expression turned into wonder again.
Sookie's eyes were lovely. I looked at her intensely as she studied my features, exploring me again with her soft touch. I studied her again in the same way. Her eyes were flecked with gray, though they were blue. Her hair made imperfect strands that framed her face. Her tanned skin would turn bright red wherever I touched her or kissed her. She looked serene as she took me in. This time she kissed me. It was the most gentle, the most soulful, the most extraordinary kiss that anyone had ever given me. She was being careful with me. It touched me. Just when I thought I couldn't have fallen any harder for her, I kept falling, again and again. With every kiss and every touch.
Feeling her legs becoming wobbly, I pulled her astride me to keep her from falling. I wanted to keep her safe, even from herself. For a long time all I could think of was our kiss and how much I wanted her. Then the reality of my life hit me like a sack of bricks. How could I keep her safe from the public part of me? That was not something that just anyone could get used to. She was such a shy person. I braced for the worst, and gave her a chance to leave me.
I felt my heart quiver with a strange pain as I told Sookie the words that could make her leave. She listened, as I knew she would. She also eased my fear.
"I'll take my chances. I don't want to be without you," she said to me. She was so shy that she couldn't look me in the eye for long after saying those words. She put her head on my shoulder and kissed my neck, sending a pulse of electricity down my spine. I cradled her on my lap, and she fell asleep in my arms, trusting as ever.
Now I was at a quandary. Should I put her in bed and leave her alone, go home? Or should I stay here? Or should I put her to bed and stay there with her? She had one arm over my shoulder, her free hand on my chest. I watched that hand for a long time. She would flex it, even while dreaming, grabbing my shirt and letting go. I didn't take it as a sign, but as an expectation. She would be expecting to see me when she woke up. I took her to her bed, laying her down gently. She did not stir. I put the covers over her, and got under them myself. I kept a bit of distance, just in case, and fell asleep quickly smelling her perfume and hearing her soft breathing.
I woke up and blinked, trying to get my bearings. The room was too dark, so it wasn't morning, but I was aware that this was Sookie's bedroom, and not mine. I was startled by her voice.
"No! No, please," she was saying the words loud, in fear. I quickly sat up in bed to see what was wrong. In the dim light cast by her bedside clock, I could tell her eyes were still closed. She was having another one of her nightmares. I smoothed her hair, trying to calm her.
"I'm here, Sookie. You're alright, love," I said soothingly, trying to bring her out of the nightmare as softly as possible. Something was off. She cringed from my touch, and even her arms flailed to cover her face. I tried once more to calm her and she started crying. I pulled her to me, hugged her to me, and she woke up with a start. She started to pull away from me, but I knew this was left over from the dream. So I held her tight. She cried into my shirt, her sobs muffled by the fabric.
I couldn't quite figure out what had made her have that particular dream. She was obviously afraid of something. The nightmares I'd had revolved around seeing my wife's lifeless body, and my feelings of helplessness. Sookie's nightmare seemed like somebody had attacked her and she was reliving it. But who had tried to hurt this beautiful person in my arms? She even apologized for having had a nightmare! I watched her fall asleep, just to make sure she had, and only then did I fall asleep myself.
The next morning I woke up alone in her bed. I started to get up to go look for her when I realized that she was in the bathroom. I heard her murmur something to her cat Buddy, who must have hidden there during the night. I waited for her, almost impatient. After all, it was a new day. Things tended to change in the light of a new day.
Sure enough, after returning my smile she became extra shy again. She looked embarrassed again, probably a result of the nightmare. I made her wait for me while I used her bathroom, and when I returned she looked like a little kid who had done something bad. She was even dangling her legs, moving them this way and that, nervous. I approached her and made her look at me. Her eyes were full of chagrin… why? The only surefire way to make her smile again was to smile myself, so I did. I heard her catch her breath before her face lit up with one of her own smiles. My heart couldn't contain itself when faced with such beauty. I took her hand and put it to my chest. Maybe the knowledge that I was just as nervous as her would make her feel a little better. Sookie's eyes widened as she felt my heart beating wildly for her. But I did not want to take anything for granted, so I asked her permission before kissing her.
What I did not anticipate was her reaction to my kiss. I tried to kiss her softly, but then felt her fingers wind once more in my hair, and her hot breath come in gasps on my lips. I pushed her far into the bed and pressed my whole body against hers. She did not try to stop me, on the contrary. Her fingers were no longer in my hair: they were undoing the buttons of my shirt. The feel of her hands on my bare skin sent desire pulsing through me. I took off my shirt and helped her with hers. Her soft skin was inviting and delicious. Her breasts formed gentle slopes on her chest. I kissed her everywhere: the indentation formed by her clavicle, the valley between her breasts, the slow rise that formed them, her shoulders, her neck, her throat.
Sookie was gasping for air when I laid my head on her chest, listening to her heart. Her legs were wrapped around me: she was not going to let me go. I rejoiced in this new feeling of wanting the person who wanted me, not just the body. The body was a means to a way. Having sex was the means. Making love was the way. I tugged at her bra to expose her full right breast. She had the color of peaches and honey, lovely and scrumptious and beautiful.
I kissed her more and more, realizing that I needed to hear her tell me it was alright. She would let me take her, of that I was sure. But I felt better giving her a chance to say no, even though I hoped with all my might that she'd say yes.
"I'm trying very hard not to take advantage of you. Please tell me to stop and I will," I whispered in her ear. I would abide by her wishes, I promised myself, whatever they happened to be. She said she wanted me too. My heart soared, my desire strengthened, and I was inside her without knowing exactly how. All I knew was why: because I was in love with her; because I loved her. Having her pinned under my body just would not do. I rolled so I could look at her, so I could touch her. I ran my hands over every inch of her body. I could not take my eyes off her, and I found that she was looking at me the same way. She traced the lines on my chest, on my arms, my belly. She reached up to touch my face, my neck, then reached behind her to run her hands over my legs. Every caress would send sparks flying from my skin.
Her body reacted to my touch again, like it had the night before. Not only did she begin to almost sing with her own voice, her body began to sing as well. It was a harmony, a chorus, all for me. I sat up and she leaned back. I ran my fingers over her body, from her neck to her thighs, like I was playing an instrument. Sookie closed her eyes and pleasure burst out of her with a soft cry. I couldn't contain myself anymore either. I rolled back and pinned her under me, spilling inside her, barely aware of anything else but her scent.
We held each other for a long time. She rested her head on my shoulder, her left hand sprawled over my stomach. All I could do was marvel at the fact that we had made love, and that it had turned into the most beautiful experience I'd ever had with another person. Sookie must have been made for me, and I for her. What else would explain what had just happened? How we had connected so easily and thoroughly? I marveled at that as well.
"You are mine," I said to her. I wasn't claiming her, exactly. I was just making a statement of a known fact.
"And you are mine," she said to me, and proceeded to close whatever little gaps there had been between her body and mine.
"Yes, darling, of course I am. You have totally and thoroughly made me fall in love with you," I said to her. I heard her breathing stop suddenly, like my being in love with her was news to her.
"You must know that," I said, looking at her surprised face. "From the very first time I saw you, the minute you growled at your garden… And then when I saw you coming out of your house in the wee hours while I was swimming," God! How I had wanted her to join me! But she was so shy, she ran away. I told her all the ways in which she had made me fall in love, and they sounded selfish. Of course, she knew exactly what to say to make me feel better. But I forgot it all in the wake of what she said next.
"I'm in love with you too," and she meant it. Her eyes smoldered as the words left her lips. My joy was overwhelming. It would be physically painful to be separated from her now.
TBC… Sigh…