Hey. Guess what?! Im such a weirdo! I ate a whole medium pizza and lost 2 pounds when i weighed myself the next day! Woo! I am like ON THE BRINK of being under weight and i eat twice as much as my brother WHO is a guy and a teenager!
I MADE A MONUMENTAL (I can't believe I spelled that right...) DECISION! You may now ask me (or the characters of this story) questions you may have...and stuff. It will be fun. X3
Question-6: When you think of the word "Death", what pops in your head?
DISCLAIMER: Jelly: I hate this.
Inuyasha: I hate you.
Jelly: THIS IS WHY I DON'T OWN YOU! NO LOVE! *cries in corner*
And now the answers of the reviewers. (Q-5: If you could be a master at anything, what would it be?)
A-4:
HanyouExorcistAlchemist48: If I had to be a master at anything, it would be wielding a katana and long bow, and kendo.
warriorwolf19keyblademaster: If I could be a master of any thing I would pick either a keyblade master or... A JEDI MASTER OH YEAH.
LadyKitsunekoIf: I was a master at anything... it would totally be BAITING SESSHOMARU-SAMA! 3
Wolflover235: Something better than sesshomaru! :P! Beat that Sesshy!
TheRealInuyasha: I prefer "jack of all trades, master of none" Because eventually, you do master it all. Is that an invalid answer? ...It is? Okay then...I'd be a master of the ninja way. The REAL ninja way, no offense to Naruto. (A/N: I have never watched Naruto {I know...what anime fan am I if I have never watched a single episode of Naruto xP})
Jelly: Master of Masters. Boom. Awesomeness. (Inuyasha: To bad your only the master at being a freak.)
PWC: dead. no life. kicked the bucket.
Brother: Master of all video games!
Email: master of loner walk...
Mom: Master of Karate! *proceeds to accidentally kick my brother in the face*
Naraku scowled at the doctor's back while he checked the clip board again...for like the eleven-tenth time! Right when the doctor turned to look at Naraku though, the dark demon...thing...put his innocent little mask back in place.
"So do you know what's wrong with me doctor?" Naraku asked in a sickly sweet voice that grossed even him out.
Said doctor, shook his head and glanced once more at Naraku's chart. "No. It's like your whole body is...dead..." The doctor's voice trailed off.
Naraku stared at the doctor before thanking him for all that he has done; Naraku reminded himself to wash his mouth out with acid...when he could move his hand again, and watched with his red eyes as the medically trained man left his home.
Damn bitch He thought to himself, referring to Kagome.
He needed a different plan.
If the girls and Miroku could take out his golem so easily, how could he go up against EVERYONE in person without being a dead man?
Suddenly, Naraku smirked.
He wouldn't send himself and he wouldn't fight them all at once. He would send someone else and separate them.
I'm such an evil Bastard. Naraku thought and laughed to himself.
Damn it. That battle was AWESOME! And guess what? It was all for a golem. A bouncing golem that was never really alive! I'm so pissed right now! But also like super happy! After the battle apparently I passed out from exhaustion, Sakurako passed out from blood loss (from the cut on her leg), and Sota was so scared he had to be carried to the car and slapped in the face before he actually TALKED. Rin of course treated everyone with what she had, but other than a few nicks and scratches and broken bones, there was no life threatening injuries. Although, my mom did almost piss her pants when Rin came in with Sota in tow, and a unconscious me being carried by...uh...I don't really remember who and Sango didn't tell me...hmmmm...
But that's beside the point! INUYASHA IS COMING BACK! I don't know where they (Sesshomaru and their father also went) and also really don't care! But guess what, after 3 days of no Inuyasha and an over protective mom, all I care about...are those cute fluffy white ears on top his head!
"INUYASHA!" I screeched with happiness, when I saw him the third day after the battle. Crap...I still need to tell him about his mother and the poison crap...I wouldn't be surprised if it was Naraku's actual crap running in her system right now.
"KAG-why do I smell Naraku on you?!" He demanded without skipping a beat.
Shit-my-shirt! I forgot to hose myself down with bleach and axe!
"U-uh...well you see..." I trailed off on my sentence, not explain like in some cheese ball fashion that you see in some books.
"You didn't..." Inuyasha growled and stormed up to me, grabbing my shoulders with a tight grip.
If I pretended to have a heart attack, do you think he would get mad?
...I hate...stuff...
"We beat him though!" I tried to defend my case, but also ended up kinda revealing I fought the bastard...
"You fought Naraku?! Damn moronic wench! I told you not to!" Inuyasha roared as I felt his claws slightly prick my arms.
That's it. Inuyasha does NOT own me! I am a free woman, damnit! And I will do whatever I want...as long as it is ok with my mom.
I wretched myself free of the dog hanyo's grasp and glared long and hard at him. "You do not own my Inuyasha Takahashi!" I seethed. "I am my own self."
"Like hell you are! I am never leaving you out of my sight again!"
"No way am I having a guard dog, bastard!"
"I'll do whatever I want, bitch!"
"Fine! As long as it doesn't involve me, you could jerk yourself off for all I care!"
"Damnit! I own you wench!" Inuyasha this time got in my personal bubble. "You are mine!"
His hot breath splashed on my face as I tried to find my voice. "I will not repeat myself, Inuyasha. I am my own self."
Said hanyo, smirked. "You just did..."
Crap...
I did.
Damnit...
"Shut it, Takahashi. I'm still pissed! And just because your beautiful, sexy lips, are in kissing distance doesn't make me any less angr-" the lips in general cut off my sentence.
Uhg... brain...melting...it's like Inuyasha's pure sexiness just fires lasers at my brain!
Inuyasha's tongue begged for an entrance. I just found out my lips are not connected to my brain, for they opened to let Inuyasha's tongue slide in.
...*moan*
Crap! Was that me or him?
"Get your paws off my woman you filthy mutt!" A voice boomed behind Inuyasha and me.
Inuyasha growled into the kiss before he released me. I wanted to smack myself because my body instantly missed his touch. He stared at me and mouthed the words 'mine' then turned to the wolf demon who interrupted, but what I saw then Inuyasha saw, was much more interesting.
Ayame, who had her arm in a sling because it would take a few days to heal, even for demon healing, was in a full on lip lock with a wide eyed Koga.
She released him and stared for a second. "Hi." She greeted innocently.
Koga gaped.
"Wooooooooo! Go Ayame!" A very distinctive voice of a young male rang throughout the house.
"Thanks Sota!" Ayame shouted and air fived my little bro.
Sota grinned and air fived back.
I, who had momentarily forgotten Inuyasha, turned back to the horn dog.
"I'm still mad atchu!" I shouted childishly.
"Bless you. And my name is actually Steve. Great. Now we both know something new about each other." Inuyasha retorted and started to walk up the stairs to my shrine. "Oh..." He turned to me and smirked. "I'm still mad at you too."
I gaped as I watched him walk up the stairs and...Damn...he has a FINE ass.
Oh dear god.
I'm becoming as bad as Miroku!
*3RD PERSON POV* *WITH SAKURAKO AND BANKOSTU*
Bankostu chuckled as he saw Inuyasha kiss Kagome after yelling at her.
"Those two are so bipolar. I should pimp slap them tomorrow." Sakurako murmured to the boy next to her.
Said boy smirked when he heard that come out of her mouth. "Why would you do that?"
...no answer as they watched Ayame kiss Koga.
"Because you all my hoes, bitch." Sakurako snapped with a smirk that quickly turned to her pursing her lips. "Isn't Ayame bi?" Sakurako questioned.
Bankostu stared at her like she grew a third boob.
Sakurako blushed from anger and embarrassment. "My head is up here, you male." She hissed.
Bankostu tore his gaze away from her chest with a lazy grin before shaking his head to rid his...sexy imaginative thoughts of Sakurako. "Yeah. Is Ayame really that noticeable?"
Sakurako turned back and watched as..."Steve" (A/N: Steve=Inuyasha) walk up the shrine stairs. "No. I'm just a people person." Her voice dripped with sarcasm.
Bankostu looked back to the people they were spying on. "We are soooo going to hell." He chuckled and turned to look at Sakurako with mischief in his eyes. "How much do you wanna bet they forgive each other by tomorrow night?"
Sakurako turned to his with a mocking laugh. "Ha! I bet $50 bucks they get back together by TONIGHT!"
"Deal! Prepare to loose, weirdo!"
"I think you will find yourself sorely disappointed when they come back to school all buddy-buddy again, hoe."
Both of the teens that stalked Inuyasha and Kagome, shook hands to seal the deal.
*INUYASHA'S POV* *BACK IN THE SHRINE*
Damn wench! She went and fought that jackass Naraku even though I told her to stay away! What would have happened if I lost her? Damnit...it hurts just to think about it...
As those thoughts bounced around my head, I slowly stalked up the stairs to old shrine I could call my second home. If they would have waited...damnit! I could have kept everyone from getting hurt!
Shit.
I blame my father for dragging me off.
I could smell the anger radiating off of Kagome and I couldn't help but smirk. That wench is still pissed about me calling her mine and snapping at her for going after Naraku.
I'm gonna punish her.
But how do I do that?
With a little bit of 'Annoyance', anything is possible!
I didn't realize how long I had been in my thoughts until a pair of arms were around my waist. I looked down and smiled small. Sota stood there with a thousand watt smile.
"Inu-man!" He beamed and jumped off of me.
I frowned slightly, at his happiness after the event. "Nothing fazes you does it kid?"
Sota smirked. "Nothing but the thought of a girl in my bed!"
Damn kid. Keep forgetting the runt isn't 6 anymore. "Aren't you a little young to be thinking that?"
"Aren't you a little gay to be hitting on my sister?" He retorted.
"I'm not gay."
"And I'm not too young."
"...well played. But the student has yet to surpass the master, because your mom just heard our whole conversation."
I took a mental video of Sota's face paling.
He turned around and gulped at the sight of a VERY scary certain mom of the Hirgurashi's glaring down at him.
Hahaha! Karma is a bitch!
I turned around and started to walk to the family room, when a pair of dark, motherly eyes and a facial structure close to mine stopped me in my tracks.
"Why in the hell would you piss Kagome off like that?!" My mother demanded and grabbed my ear.
Ow! Shit!
This hurts, but I won't let my mom know that.
Said mother shoved me on to a couch and towered over my with her scary you-just-dug-your-own-grave-while-getting-yourself -in-deep-shit face.
Preparing for stupid motherly speech that I will ignore.
FML
Karma is a bitch...
*KAGOME'S POV*
Stupid hanyo! Where the hell does he get the nerve to call me his?!
Grrr! I should rip his balls off and force feed him them!
I walked around...him! And over to the kitchen where dinner called.
I can't believe I was excited to here he was back! He could have stayed where ever the hell is for all I care!
As my thoughts continued in ranting about Inuyasha, I started to turn on the heat and grab a large pot before turning on the radio. I started to sing to some weirdo song that made absolutely no sense to me and dance around the kitchen.
Noodles...
Eggs...
Prepackaged spices since I can't cook on my own worth crap...
Water to boil the noodles in...
Why am I thinking like this...?
(A/N: if you didn't notice, she was making Ramen)
"Honey, why are you talking to yourself?" A voice behind me caused me to scream and latch onto the nearest object, which was the fridge.
Inuyasha of course had to walk in right at the moment. His raised one eyebrow but didn't comment.
But someone else did.
"Woooo! Getting it on with the fridge, eh Sis?" Sota then proceeded to do a pelvic thrust with an 'uh!' To accentuate it.
"Mom...I, um..." Wow. Awkward.
"It's ok, honey. I know you are mentally screwed up." My mother joked and patted my head as I uncurled from around the fridge.
Damnit. Why must these things happen to me?!
I stomped out of the kitchen cause mom was cooking now. Good. I would probably find a way to burn the water anyway.
Sota followed me out like a dog and was panting loudly. I eventually got sick of it and spun around to pimp slap him, only to find him gone.
What the hell?
Where did he go?
Then when I turned around again, I screamed in surprise and punched my brother in the face.
...OH MY GOD! I PUNCHED MY BROTHER IN THE FACE! I DONT KNOW IF I SHOULD BE LAUGHING OR FREAKING OUT!
"Sota!" I laughed and fell to the floor. "Are you *snort* ok?"
"You snorted..." Inuyasha commented from above. I looked up to glare at him, only to see him sipping on a Capri-sun.
"Is that the last one?" I asked calmly.
The hanyo smirked. "Yep!" He popped his lips at the 'p'.
"And you're not going to share?"
"Nope."
"Are you Prepared to die, because I'm still pissed at your ass and you just did a stupid thing and drink my last juice?"
"Yep."
"Ok."
"You're ready?"
"Sure am."
"Here I co-" Damn it! WHY MUST I ALWAYS BE INTERUPTED?!
"IM HERRRREEEEE!" An overly excited Rin shouted as she stormed in through the front door like she owned the place.
Sesshomaru was behind her, looking thoroughly pissed at the young girl in front of him. But he stood next to her anyway.
"Damn it! My beautiful face!" Sota screamed and clutched his face. Oh yeah...I punched my brother. Ha! I punched my brother in the face!
I stared at him for a good moment or two before snorting in amusement and walking away toward Inuyasha who towered over me with a smug look on his face.
"You cheeky shit-faced bastard..." I growled as I poked his chest. Oh dear lord...I hurt my finger. What a total turn on... "I am going to murder you the moment I have a chance to murder you."
Inuyasha smirked at me. "You just said the same word twice in a sentence."
"That is so weird that I didn't even notice that I did that." Ha-ha! Suck that you puss!
"Losing your composure now aren't you? I'm more pissed at you than you are at me but look..." Inuyasha gestured broadly. What a bouncing dickity face... "Nothing is destroyed."
I was about to say some AMAZING comeback that would send Inuyasha back on his ass. But...of Couse, cause irony hates me, I was interrupted.
"KAGOME! DIDNT I TELL YOU I WAS HERE?!" Rin screeched and launched herself at me.
Hahaha! Sesshomaru AND Inuyasha were both glaring at Rin and me.
I screeched as I got a boob full of face...wait...that come out wrong. Uh...whoa...
"Fin...pour bests hin mah fash." Wow...did you understand that? Cause I sure as hades didn't.
Rin smiled at me and laughed. "Why yes. My breasts are in your face, aren't they?"
Damn her innocence.
"HELLO! Is my dearest Sango hereee~..." Miroku's voice trailed off when he saw Rin position then he dropped dramatically to his knees and took a praying position. "Why must Buddha punish me? When you bless me with these events, you can't help but at least give me a camera?!"
"Rornky moy..." I mumbled out...I think.
"Why yessss! He is a horny boy!" Rin shouted in reference to my earlier...mumbled.
"Mar moo toin' coo meeceet ebery hing ah sah?"
"Why yes I am going to repeat everything you say!" Rin laughed again and smooshed her boobs harder into my face. "Getting horny yet Kags?"
...whoa...was I the only one who felt death in the air (from our very own lord fluffy) the moment Rin said this.
"Mest omf." I can't breath!
"Fine...I'll get off." I sucked in a breast of hair...wow...dude I can't even think straight today my brain is so bounced up. Let me try that again. I sucked in a breath of air the moment my face was released from the death traps.
Miroku pouted when she got off. "Why couldn't you have stayed a bit longer. Uncle was about to get a picture."
"Hoshi. If you want to have children in the near future, I heavily suggest you never bring this even up again." Lord of the stick-up-his-ass spoke stoically.
"Ahh...common Fluffy." Rin jumped up and pecked him on the lips the same instant Sota came running through the house screaming.
"Ahhhhhhhhhhh!" Should I help him? "I need help!" He technically didn't ask for help... "PLEASE HELP!"
Damn you...
I was about to ask the 15 year old what his problem was when the source walked through the door.
"SOTA!" Sango giggled and shouted. Her arm was covered in ugly black bruises and held in a sling. "Come here so we can MAKE OUT!"
...what?!
Sota's reaction was a girlish scream then to bolt behind my snickering mom.
Sango just seemed to scan her surroundings and finally realized when she was. "Whoa! I'm in Kaggy's house! SWEET! KAGS DEAR! YOUR LOVELY SAN-BAN IS ~HOME~!" She sang the last word.
"My ears just turned inside out!" Inuyasha then fell to the floor clutching his adorble ears dramatically.
"Sango?" I approached her hesitantly.
She turned to me then grinned broadly. "Honey!" She squealed and planted a slobbery kiss right on my lips. "I'm home!"
"Damn it!" Ewewewew! Get. It. OFF! "What the hell Sango?! Are you high?! Did someone slip some drugs into your toaster stroodle?!"
"Hahahahahahahahahaha!" Sango then proceeded to laugh like a moron. "I F***ING LOVE MY HYDRO'S!"
Ohh...she is stoned out of her mind. Crap.
"Oh dear!" My mom exclaimed and went to cover Sota's ears. But he had opened his mouth to speak.
"Shit, Sango! You shouldn't swear, damn it!" He shouted at the stoned girl.
"I want some damn cookies now, hoes!" Sango shouted and hopped on Inuyasha. "And I want this hunk-of-half-demon in my bed and his face in between my legs licking my pus-"
My mom choose the right time to cough and announce she was taking the responsible adults (which was her and Inuyasha's mom) to the den.
I then noticed Miroku was quietly sobbing in the corner of woe while sneaking glares of hate at Inuyasha. Probably because of what Sango said to the half demon...
"Woo! Imma hoe! Now all I need is a pimp!" Rin shouted referring to the title Sango had bestowed on all of us before preceding rip off her shirt and revealing her tiny toob top under shirt.
"Rin." Sesshomaru spoke stoically.
Hahaha! He got BONER!
"Did someone say they needed a pimp?" Sakurako then chose to strut into my house, her leg was covered in white gauze and I'm pretty sure she should have a crutch...
Rin giggled and nodded her head.
Damn. I am surrounded by morons.
"Ahhh! Its spicy!" Inuyasha chucked a box of tabasco Cheeze-it's on the ground and started to breath like a retarded dragon.
"Sango. I would suggest you stop humping my leg this moment." Sesshomaru growled at the leg humping Sango
"Never!" Sango shouted.
"EVERYONE! QUIET!"
Said everyone shut up and looked over to the door and gulped.
Well I was shitting bricks, but you know...
Jakotsu stood there with a super pissed look. Dear dog...we are all going to die!
"You!" He snapped at me.
"Me!" Ha! Sorry I couldn't help it!
"Why did you go after Naraku?!" He demanded and stormed up to me. He was almost the same height as Inuyasha, just a bit shorter than me, so he still towered over me a good couple inches.
"Um..uh..w-well..." Hide! Dive behind Inuyasha!
Said half demon glared over his shoulder at my crouching form. "Don't hide behind me, dude. I'm with Jakotsu."
"Oh! You can be with me in more than one way, Inu-sweety. Oo-o-o-o! Just gives me shivers thinking about it!" Jakostu swooned. Ewww Jak's creepy side is showing!
Inuyasha pointedly ignored him and turned back to me...he has a nice ass!
"Kagome?" I ripped my eyes away from the tantalizing butt of Inuyasha and looked at him innocently. "Sango is licking your weinis."
What the hell?!
I looked down and found my elbow was indeed
covered in Sango-spit. I glared at Sango who stared at me with an innocent look and her tongue sticking strait out and my elbow covered in Sango saliva.
"Ewwww! Sango got her slime all over my elbow!" EW EW EW EW EWWW GET. IT. OFF!
Miroku jumped up from where he was sulking with a determined look on his face. "That's what she said!"
Ahhh! Someone just tackled me in a hug! But that's a good thing! Cause Sango was licking me again!
"You could have at least invited me!" Jak wailed as he clutched me.
"Cant...Breathe..." HELLLLLP!
Suddenly, Jak was off of me. I looked up after coughing my lungs up, at Bankotsu, who was staring down at me.
Random thought alert! What would Bank look like with a monocle...?
"The raging homo is right..." Bank spoke as I looked over at Inuyasha who was being attacked by Jak. "You could have just called us up and you know...invite us to kick some ass..."
"Which was awesome by the way!" Sakurako put in before being silenced by a group of glares.
"I am truly hurt that you would not invite us to such a thing." Bank spoke in a weak, tired voice of pain and misery.
I raised an eyebrow.
He sighed then grinned crookedly
"Yeah I didn't think that would work either." The ebony braid wearing male said.
"Oh. my. god...did you just BITE my nipple through my shirt?!" Inuyasha once again claimed my attention...and what?!
"I mean come on!" Bank sighed dramatically and put his hands up like the ceiling can't hold us. "If you invited us, you probably wouldn't have been hurt and junk!"
Jakostu giggled in the background at Inuyasha.
Hahaha! Inuyasha looked like he was going to piss his pants!
"No sill-"
"Get your hands away from there you homo rapist frea-UWAHHH!"
"Trust me...I didn't even want Sango, Ayame, and Rin to come!" I really didn't. Those stupid people got hurt cause of their own stupid fault...and stuff.
"Ahhhhh! Why in the HELL are you SQUEEZING it?!"
"Couldn't you have just made them go away?" Bankostu demanded.
I gave him a look.
"Ok...that was a stupid question ignore that." Bank is finally catching on!
"Sango dear! I love you! If you should be in need of a wenis to lick or a leg to hump...it should be mine!" What in the HELL for goats is Miroku talking about?!
"Dance magic. Dance magic dance. Dance magic dance. Blah blah blah. Work that magic. Set em free!" Ok...I'm fairly certain Rin is singing the wrong lyrics...
And...
Suddenly, because things just had to get weirder...my grandpa comes streaking through the house. "Die foul demons!"
BOOM!
"THATS IT!" My mom stormed into the wild room, looking toughly pissed.
Ah crap...
*11:00 at night in Kagome's room* (A/N: thats right! I just left yall hangin'!)
Owww...ow..owowowow...ow...OW
OW!
*Ow*...
Did I mention...Ow?
Yeah my mom is scary. Let's just say, after all of that...my mom kinda...snapped.
Scary.
So here I am...I'm my room, with multiple bumps on my head and a body still aching cause some ass wipe name Naraku had to go and start hittin' me like I'm some random hoe!
WHICH I AM NOT!
*thunk*
Shh! What was that?!
*sshhwish...eeeee~kump*
Ok...those are not natural noises!
Time to activate my awesome ass kicking that is only archived by my awesome ninja...ness...YEAH!
"HI-YAH!"
"OW!" Inuyasha fell to the ground clutching his baby makin' parts. "What the hell was that for, Kagome?!"
Oops...
"That, my dear Inuyasha, was ninja..." I spoke in my crappy British accent.
"Well it sucks!"
"Not as much as-...yeah I'm not going to finish that..."
Inuyasha sat tenderly down on my bed.
Then I remembered something. I'm still mad at him!
"I'm still mad at you!" I exclaimed stupidly.
Inuyasha gave me a flat look. "No shit Sherlock, I thought the girl (you) who held a grudge against some random ass kid in 3rd grade for stealing your stuffed platypus, for 5 years is going to forgive me in a few hours."
"Hey! Fransin was very important to me! Wait-me forgive you?! Ha ! Your funny!"
I sat down next to Inuyasha anyways. Just like I always do, even though I was pissed out of my mind at him. The half demon tenderly poked at his...um...not-going-to-say-because-thats-where-bo y's-cooties-come-from thing and winced...wait...why am I staring at that?!
"Kags...why are you staring at my junk like it killed a kitten?" Inuyasha asked me with a abit of fear in his face.
"I...don't...know..."
"Well stop! It's stalkerish!"
He brought that up again!? "I'm not your bouncing stalker!"
"Yes you are! Why else would you stare at my now forever soft dic-"
Thou who I am mad at was suddenly cut off as the door swung open, revealing a extremely pissed Izayoi. "Inuyasha if you want to even be able to see the light of the day ever again, I would suggest you don't finish that sentence."
Inuyasha looked like he was about to piss his pants.
Ha!
"Now..." Inuyasha's momma turned around and started to close the door. "Your mother and I are going to proceed and get wasted out of our mind. No alcohol for you two, k?"
"Aye..." Wait...damnit. Why did I say that?
The door clicked close and Inuyasha turned to me. I stared at him...he stared at me...we both stared at each other...did my cat just pee on the carpet...damnit...that...will...be...hard...to...c ...l...e...a...n...u...p...
Uh...
"Kagome?"
No..
"Kags!" Inuyasha grabbed my shoulders and started to shake me like a british nanny.
"What?!" I screamed at him.
"...there is a thong stuck to your butt..."
Oh...
Wait! What?!
I screeched and jumped up; rubbing my hands on my ass trying to dislodge the said thong, Inuyasha watching intently, and sure enough, a lacey racey red thong fell to the floor. My face exploded in bright pink color.
I recognized the thong.
Don't ask how...
It was Rin's.
"Why in the hell is Rin's thong in my room?!" I screeched.
(*With Rin and Sesshomaru*) *3RD PERSON*
Rin laid contently on her mates bare super sexy chest that made her want to just coat it in syrup and lick it all off. It was so damn hot; she just wanted to bake a dozen cookies on it.
Mmm.
She would eat those cookies. *Wink wink*
"It seems the hanyo and his mate have discovered the thong that was left in her room from the one activity we had last month." The lord of all that is Fluffy shook the dark brown haired girl out of her thoughts.
Rin laughed evilly and hoped that her own little Kags could hear it.
(*back to Inuyasha and Kagome*) *BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH POV*
I swear I can hear Rin cackling.
Damnit, I'm going to tie her to a bed...wait that would just turn into something really kinky between Fluff king and her.
Damn.
I decided to take out my anger on Inuyasha.
"Get off my bed and out of my room." I commanded him.
"No." He replied.
"I'm mad at you! Get out!"
"I'm mad at YOU! Get out!"
"This is my room!"
"So?!"
A sudden pounding on the wall from my mom's room cut off our VERY mature arguing.
"Shut the hell up you two!" Izayoi's voice slurred. I think she is drunk. "Kagome's mother and I are going to have very passionate lesbian sex!"
"Mom, you not lesbian." Inuyasha yelled back.
"Damn..."
"Am I, Sweet fart?" This time it was my mom.
...did she just call me sweet fart?
"No momma." I shouted at her and glared at Inuyasha who was snickering at the name my mom called me.
Damn bastard.
I'm gonna super glue his junk to Koga's foot!
Take that!
"...Kagome...your staring at my junk with a extremely evil face again and its scaring me." Inuyasha whines pathetically, catching my attention off his manly man parts.
(*10 minutes of bouncing awkward silence later*)
"Wanna go rape some walls?"
"I thought you were still mad at me!"
"Oh...yeah, that's right! GET THE HELL OUT OF MY ROOM! YOU FAINTING GOAT!" That's right! I just call Inuyasha a fainting goat!
"...yeah, cause that's what I am." Said Hanyo's voice dripped with sarcasm.
By this time I was actually starting to get angry, like actually angry. Not that stupid shallow ass anger. Full on anger crap. I was annoyed, you know, that annoyance you get after someone doesn't listen to you? Even though my tone was joking, he should still have left my room the first time I asked, that bastard! I mean who does he think he is? Just barging in here without even asking my permission and acting like he owns then place!
"Kagome?"
"Really Inuyasha get out." I spoke, my tone losing its playful edge.
The hanyo finally picked up on my tone and scowled slightly. "Why?"
"Because this is my room-"
"No, why did you go after Naraku?"
"I went to have tea with him..."
"..."
"...Really?"
"No! I went to rescue Sota, Inuyasha! He was there, held captive, by some crazy bastard that used to be my best friend, possessed your ex-girlfriend and my old other best friend, raped her, almost raped me, almost killed me, and got my brother. I don't think he was in the hands of a mentally stable person."
Breathe Kagome, breathe.
Inuyasha's face suddenly darkened. "Well what would have happened to Sota if you guys lost to Naraku while you were trying to rescue him?" His voice was deathly calm. "What would have happened to Sota if you were to be captured? What would have happened if you were taken away?! Think of what that would do to your mother! To lose both her children in one fowl swoop!"
I gulped. He was right.
What would have happened if I had been captured? That thought shook me to the bone.
"What about me...?"
I looked up and fought down the blush that threatened to overtake me like...wow...did the thoughts that popped into your head sound as dirty as the ones that popped into mine?
For me, it involved Inuyasha, a bed, and a pair of hand cuffs.
Inuyasha's face was near inches away from mine. His golden eyes bore into my chocolate ones with such intensity, most women would faint.
"What about me?" His question rang though my brain again. What would have happened to him if i had suddenly gone missing? What about me? What would have happened if I had left him?
I couldn't even imagine it, that's how bad the thought was. It hurt just to think about it.
"You're such an idiot..." He growled suddenly, shaking me out of my internal...thoughts...things...stuff...so...yeah.. .
I looked up into his burning eyes. It was like they were full of fire! It's kinda creepy...
Wait...he just called me an idiot!
That ass hat!
(*Switching to third person because Kagome's brain is going to become a helpless pile of goo in a second*)
Inuyasha's lips descended upon Kagome's and; as predicted, her mind melted to goo upon the contact.
The kiss lasted until Kagome had to pull back for air. Because, well people need air. Unless they are dead. Then they don't need air.
Inuyasha started to attack her neck with wet open mouthed kisses, leaving a hot scorching trail of saliva in his wake and Kagome to write and blubber random noises that may or may not be attractive.
"You..." *kiss* "are..." *kiss* "a..." *liiiicccckkkk* "idiot!"
He murmured out those words between each kiss much to Kagome's chagrin, but continued his attack of random noise and tinglies-down-there inducing kisses.
"Stop calling me an idiot, assho-mmph!" Her sentence was cut off by another hot and searing kiss that left the poor untrained Miko moaning and writhing as Inuyasha pushed her down onto the bed, effectively trapping her in between his FREAKING AMAZING arms.
A very small part of Kagome's mind was fairly entertained in the thought of kneeing the Hanyo in his golden parts while it was super hyper sensitive. Of course that thought was effectively put to rest by Inuyasha's laser-beam-gaze-of-brain-melting-awesomeness and his equally brain-melting action.
One of Inuyasha's hand pinned Kagome's arms above her head in a swift motion that left her mind spinning more than it already was.
His free hand had just ducked underneath her shirt, tracing the lines of her ribs with his claws and discovering places that could make her moan if it was a turn-on-spot, or giggle if it was a tickle-spot. Both places were stored in the half-demon's mind for later use.
"Ahh!" Kagome grunted. "I'm supposed to be mad at you, damnit!" She hissed at him.
"Shh..." The hanyo soothed and continued his exploration of the flesh beneth the shirt, his lips smothering any other thoughts that didn't revolve around him, naked, and bed. Maybe a bit of rope or hand-cuffs too.
(*InuTashio's POV*)
How should I request her to come back?
"Izayoi! Come hither yon human mate!"
...no. She would get mad if I called her 'Mate'.
"You! The one who I love! Come back to our home of love~"
...that could not have sounded any gayer.
"Come to me you will, if you desire the sexiest of all dog demons!"
...last time I checked...she was not a big fan of Yoda...
Damn...
"What do I say...?" My voice rang out.
"What? No answer for a brother in need?"
"Well what do you know!? You're just a door!" I kicked the door that offended my feelings and watched in grim satisfaction as it fell down from the force, revealing the Hirgurashi's humble home.
I will have to repay them for that...
So, like the amazing being I am, I walked into the house. The smell of lots of booze instantly adulates me like a foul beast I must slay! The scent was accompanied by two female humans. One of which was my mate!
Oh dear lord of god above...
A drunken Izayoi is like multiple hells.
I looked at the ground and stared at the multiple empty beer bottles that sat smugly next to 2 and a half empty vodka bottles.
The smell of my lovely mate was all over the living room and by the amount of smashed objects I suspected she had trouble walking.
...Either that or she thought she was a Kung fu master again.
Probably that.
I followed the wobbly scent accented of alcohol up the stairs and almost immediately after reaching the upper level, my AMAZING nose was assaulted with the scent of sex. Hot, heavy, teenage sex. Not yet initiated, but they were damn close. And I doubt it was Sesshomaru and Rin getting it on the closet again. They were two busy doing that in the laundry room at Fluffy's house.
How do I know that?
Simple. I can hear them. Rin is quiet the screamer.
No, it had to be Inuyasha and the lovely Kagome whom were getting it on. I walked over to the room where the moans and sighs were coming from, and swung the door open without knocking.
Cause I'm an adult.
And they are children.
And in return, basically my bitches.
Boom. Logic from my fantastic mind.
Each child was shocked into not moving, just staring awkwardly at me in my amazing glory. Kagome was straddling my sons lap and very thankfully blocking the very likely problem in his pants. Both their mouths were open and connected by a probably now cold string of saliva. Inuyasha's hands were at the half way mark of tugging Kagome's tank top off and her pajama shorts looked suspiciously like they used to be full length and ended up suffering the full extent of my son's claws.
I raised an eyebrow (that only the gods could have sculpted!) at them and crossed my arms (also something that only the gods could have sculpted!) and waited for the two trouble makers to speak.
Kagome coughed awkwardly and detangled herself from Inuyasha, and tugging her tank top down with a raging blush that extended toward her neck.
"Um. Hi." She had spoken!
"Hi." I spoke less! It's like golf. I win.
"We can explain-"
"I'm just gonna stop you right there and tell you that there are no condom's at all in this household and demon sperm are very strong and resilient."
With that said, I turned around and left the blushing Kagome and my son; who was currently pounding his head on the wall repeatedly and chanting quotes from Golden Girls, to their own accord.
Why was he doing that, you ask?
I do not know...
Probably to get rid of that large problem in his pants. He got that from me!
I smirked at the couple and released them of my holy presence, and instead decided to bless my mate and her friend with me being near them!
The door to Kagome's mother's room swung open and revealed a plain room with a large bed in the center and a wall full of pictures and drawing from her kids.
Ah! My mate!
You lay upon the bed like a goddess! And Kagome's mother is all but TAINTNG your awesomenessity!
"Noooooooooooooooo!"
Crap...I just said that out loud!
No matter! They should be happy I allowed them to wake to my voice.
"INUTASHIO!" My mate screamed at the top of her lungs...and not in the good way. (A/N: *wink wink*)
Her soft eyes bore burning holes into my head as I stared (cowered) at her. She stormed up to me and looked down- which takes talent cause I'm taller than her- at me.
Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit.
"You WOKE me from me alcohol induced slumber FOOL!" She spoke (roared) angelically at me.
She is so pretty when she is about to castrate me...
"I'm sorry, honey!" I admit it! I did, maybe, grovel, sorta, at her feet.
Maybe.
Sorta.
You can't prove anything cause...brain fart.
"What are you doing here?!" She asked me sharply.
"I came to get you, honey. And bring you home." I spoke with a small smile as I stood up to my AMAZING height once more.
"And I had left a note on the counter top-"
She had left the note with cookies! (A/N: They had been dog biscuits!)
"-stating I was at the Higurashi household!"
And as if to accentuate her point, Ms. Higurashi snored loudly before shifting in the bed to the point where her butt was sticking strait up into the air.
Ah! Just like my equally godly wife to speak so sweetly to me.
"Yes but I still miss you!" I told her with my entire honor still intact.
She sighed and rubbed her temples as Ms. Higurashi gnawed and drool on a large pillow.
Disgusting. The saliva flowing out her mouth is like a water fall.
Me and/or my divine wife would never let something like that happen whilst we are sleeping.
"No. I am staying here."
Ah! Did you hear that?!
That is the sound of my heart that belongs to my one and only goddess-of-a-wife, breaking!
My wife gave me a weird look. "Are...are you crying?!"
*sniffle* "No," *hiccup* "I am not.."
"Uhg...you can take Inuyasha back with you if you're so lonely."
Huh...
I guess he can keep me company.
But not the same way I want.
From my wife.
Who is female.
That from Inuyasha is just wrong on so many levels.
I sighed like a man and hunched over also like a man.
"Fine..." Now to get my son..."INUYASHA!"
"FRIED MASHED POTATOES!" Ms. Higurashi shook awake from my godly roar and jumped off the side of the bed. "Uhg...ouch. Izayoi? Are you still here?"
(*KAGOME'S POV*)
Damn.
Damn it.
Dog damn it.
Shit.
Frick.
Why in the HELL, did he have to come in at the moment?! I was very well enjoying myself when he just burst in.
"aiajsndkdneknekrofkdammn!" Yes...that is Inuyasha at the moment. He stopped quoting the 'Golden girls' and is now moving on to the tender stage of complete and utter gibberish.
Lovely.
"Inuyasha." I'm trying to get his attention.
Guess how that is doing?
About as well as Koga and a balloon.
"Inuyasha."
"Yahsie?"
"Yshity-yo-yo."
"Inu-baby"
"INUYASHA!"
Ok, that one wasn't me...
But of course, that calling of his name had to get his attention.
"I'm gonna kill him..." Inuyasha muttered to himself. "I'm gonna rip his head off and shove it so far up his ass, it's coming back through his neck...rip his arms off, beat him with 'em...make his junk Invert..."
I was about to follow Inuyasha when I saw a light in the corner of my room. On my desk...ah crap!
My laptop was on!
And Skype was on!
Was that Miroku's face?!
He was laughing, damnit!
I stormed up to the laptop and stared straight into the camera and turned it off of silent.
"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING ON MY COMPUTER YOU DAMN LECH?!" I demanded.
"Why do you have to call me such horrid names, Lady Kagome?" He pouted.
Cheeky bastard.
"What did you see?" I demanded.
Miroku made an innocent face. "Oh nothing except you and Inuyasha getting it on."
*Insert me trying to strangle Miroku through the laptop here*
"You better not tell anyone..." I let that threat trail off.
But of course instead of him paling in fear, he grinned, which made me pale in fear cause that is his I-gotta-plan-and-you-can't-stop-me grin... face...thing.
He is a thing!
But he is a thing...with a grin that is scary as hell!
Damn you hormones for getting me and Inuyasha together!
"I recorded it and..." Oh dog he better not say it... "Gave it to..." No...No! Don't say that name! "Sango."
"AKQNIENFJSIZBRJIXOALMANROS!"
Miroku...I present to you...
Me having an almost seizer on my floor whilst screaming gibberish the whole time.
Ow...
I just stubbed my toe.
I reached up and slammed the laptop shut and hit it a few hundred times before deciding to stand up.
"Damn you, you crappy laptop! This is all of your bouncing fault!" ok so maybe I chuckled my laptop on the ground and stomped on it a few times. Maybe. "I HATE you! Arrgggg"
Imma pirate.
Oh dear dog...
I just threw my laptop on the floor like a barbarian!
"Oh Paul!" His name is Paul! "I'm so sorry!" I picked up the bruised and battered laptop and cradled it in my arms while I dusted it off with one of the electronic cleaning rags I got from a store with a name.
"I love you Paul. I'm sorry for what I said. Do you still love me?" I set the BEAUTIFUL laptop on my desk once more and tenderly lifted the screen.
And to prove that Paul still loves me, the logo of the laptop flickered on and led me to my desk top.
"Thank you Paul." I all but cried.
It was such a happy moment in my life.
I couldn't keep my eyes from moistening.
"Kagome..."
Who is that?
There is no one in my room except for...
"Paul...? Are...did my love bring you to life?" I asked my laptop.
I heard a sigh from the voice. "Yes, I am your laptop, Kagome." Strange Paul sounds oddly sarcastic and rude.
"Do me a favor, Kagome...turn around." Paul told me.
Why?
Does Paul not like me?
Does Paul not what me to view upon his awesomeness?!
I'm sorry Paul!
I bowed down and worshiped the godly laptop that spoke from above.
"Kagome!" The voice snapped and for the first time, I realized that it came from behind me.
I looked around and...
Oh dog.
That was Inuyasha talking and...and I thought it was the computer.
And he saw me talking to the computer.
Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit.
"Hi." I managed to squeak out.
He raised an eyebrow. That was over his eyes. His beautiful, godly, bouncing amazing liquid gold eyes.
"uh..." I'm so smart.
"Don't worry, Paul and I won't tease you for that." He reassured with a cocky grin. "Walk me to your door and give me hugs and kisses of goodbyeness, Wench."
I nodded, then it struck me.
"Why do you need me to walk you to my door? It's not like you're going to get lost." I stood up, kissed Paul goodnight and walked over to the Hanyo who had his hands in his pockets.
"I'll let you touch my ears."
"Come hither yon child!"
(*At the door*)
Ahhhhhhhhh. His ears are so cute.
I wanna chop them off and keep them in a box.
Geeze...
I sounded like Jakostu...
Who cares?!
Hee hee hee. They twitched in my hands.
"Are you almost done, Kag-" He was cut off by me smacking the side of his head.
"Shut up and enjoy the rare moment of my boobs in your face while I rub your ears." Its true. He didn't want to sit down and let me do it so I compromised and reached up, but he had to still lean over a bit and in return...
Yeah.
Face in boobs.
I don't mind.
"Hello Inuyasha dear."
And my face just exploded into metaphorical fire because my mom is witnessing our VERY compromising situation.
B.M.L.
"Oh Kagome honey? I would very much like to speak to you...alone, dear." My mother gave Inuyasha an apologetic smile as I pulled away.
Inuyasha then, once more, again, two times now (A/N: Wut...), started to pound his head into the wall.
My mom led me away gently.
I love her.
She is so sweet.
Sorry, just had to let you know.
"Kagome. I purified Izayoi."
I jumped when I heard that. "You did? W-why?"
My mother smiled gently and then spoke in that voice that wouldn't let anyone hate her.
"I have known for a while she has been poisoned. I was the first to know. Why do you think I always invite her over for dinner instead of going over to their house for dinner?"
Ok...now I'm confused.
What in the hell does dinner have to do with poison?
(*Kagome's Mother's POV*)
I watched as my daughter's face slowly morph into confusion and chuckled slightly.
I love my daughter...but she is a complete moron when it comes to being a priestess.
"I've been adding spiritual energy into her food and slowly letting that build up a barrier to the effects of the poison till I got close enough to finish purifying the remaining poison." I explained.
I'm going to guess my daughter is thinking at the moment, something along "Damn! My mom is bouncing awesome!"
How do I know that?
She just said it out loud.
"Honey, you're saying your thoughts out loud again." I reminded her.
Kagome blushed and sputtered out something along the lines of "The hell I did..."
Then she had to go and change the subject to something I really didn't want to talk about.
"So how close did you have to be to...yah know...purify Mrs. Takahashi and all that junk?" ahhh, my daughter is so proper yet not.
I think I did a fairly good job raising her.
But why in the world did she have to ask that question?
(*Kagome's POV*)
My mother looked down and...oh my god. Is that...it is!
She is blushing!
Momma coughed and looked up at me. "Fairly close, dear."
Fairly...close.
Her and Izayoi
* Quick flashback *
"Shut the hell up you two!" Izayoi voice slurred. I think she is drunk. "Kagome's mother and I are going to have very passionate lesbian sex!"
* Quick flashback end *
Uh...are you people thinking the same thing I am?
"Did you...uh...yah know...have...um...*cough*
...S-sex?"
Wow...
That...
Was the most awkward thing I have ever asked in my whole life.
My mom's face exploded in bright red color. "Not THAT close! All I had to do was kiss her...heavily...and transfer the proper amount of energy to finish off the poison!"
So basically...
My mom and Inuyasha's mom was making out while Inuyasha and I were making out.
Just like my family reunion.
Talk about deja vu.
I was about to reply when-OF COURSE!-I was interrupted.
Cause the big cheese man that lives in the sky's cotton candy, loves to see me rip out my own hair in frustration.
"I told you boy, women LIKE that!"
"And I told you old man, I won't do it!"
What in the hell are they talking about now?
I walk over; completely abandoning my mom cause I got the attention span of a squirrel, and see what in the world is going on.
"But why not?! They like that! We do, so why not them?!"
"Cause we're dog demon! They are not, moron-AHH! LEGGO MY EARS!"
"Take that back!"
This has to be...family bonding I guess.
Inuyasha was in a hold with his head trapped by InuTashio's arm while the other arm was pulling on his son's poor ears.
I wonder how long it will take them to realize that I'm here…?
"Women like having their stomach rubbed!" InuTashio roared.
Do you hear that?
That is the noise of me pounding my head into a wall because of the ridiculousness of InuTashio's statement.
A hand was gently placed on my shoulder.
"Honey..." My mother said with a soft smile. "You're going to have no brain cells left if u keep doing that."
Huh.
Would you look at that?
That statement gave me enough juice to bang a hole in my wall with my skull...
And cause a head ache.
This head ache is a bitch!
Damn you wall!
"DUMB-ASSES!" Uh-oh...Izayoi sounds maaaaaad.
"I told you already InuTashio! Women don't like their stomach rubbed the same way you do!" Izayoi seethed. Scary. "And YOU!" Her gaze snapped to Inuyasha who saluted her immediately.
"Yes, Ma'am!" Inuyasha is such a smart-ass.
"Why the hell do you go through Kagome's window?! I already knew you were coming! You told me you were coming to; quote "Get that damn wench to apologize!" end quote."
WHAT?
*INUTASHIO'S POV*
Ah my poor son!
Alas I cannot save you without suffering the same fate!
So...I might as well kick back and watch my son get verbally abused by his mother and future mate.
Ahhh. Nothing beats family bonding time!
(*TEN MINUTES OF VERBAL ABUSE LATER...*)
Inuyasha is a wimp.
He needs to grow a pair and not turn into a pile of twitching limbs when he is mildly (severely) verbally abused. (A/N: that was a lot of 'Y's)
"Well..." Inuyasha's daddy clapped his hands. "Amazing display girls, but my son and I must leave."
InuTashio groaned and he lifted his son up and slung Inuyasha over his shoulder. The motion stirred the half demon and soon golden eyes were staring at me in question.
Geeze...
He's probably wondering what's goin' on at the moment.
"Wow..." InuTashio adjusted the hanyo on his shoulder. "You're heavy!"
"Hey!" Inuyasha snapped at his father. "I'm not heavy your just weak!"
InuTashio glanced back at Inuyasha and grinned. "You're awake!"
"No shit, Sherlock!"
"good, cause now I don't have to carry your fat ass home."
"Fat a-...I don't weigh that much, ass-tart! You're just weak!"
"Weak?! How could you say that to someone as AMAZING as I am?!"
"Go shove your overly large head up you camel toe, old man!"
Uhg...they are so annoying...
"I'm going to bed everyone!" I shouted over Inuyasha and InuTashio's arguing and walked towards my stairs.
"Ok, honey!" My mom smiled to me as she sat down in front of our TV, grabbing a game remote. "Izayoi and I are just going to play some games!"
As I walked up stairs, the arguing between father and son, and the playful banter between my mom and Mrs. Takahashi got quieter.
Now sleep...
...OH DEAR BOUNCING DOG ABOVE!
ITS 5:30 AND I HAVE TO GET UP AT 6:30 FOR SCHOOL!
HOW DID IT GET SO LATE?! Or early...Ugh I don't even know anymore.
(*IN THE MORNING AT SCHOOL*)
HEY! Heyheyheyheyheyhey!
You know when you get like...a little bit of sleep and the next day youre like...SUPER HYPER?!
THAT'S ME RIGHT NOW!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
AHHH! I'M FALLING!
"Kagome? Yah know you can't run up walls, right?" Inuyasha said as he easily caught me.
No. "Pshhh! YEAH! Duh! What do you take me for?! An idiot?!" I'm so smooth!
As Inuyasha gave me a patronizing look and set me down, I grabbed his hand and held onto it will all my human strength. Because I can. And because Inuyasha's hand is the best. It's like the perfect combination between soft and calloused. Plus, it feels like a giant hand-made security blanket has been wrapped around me when I hold his hand.
Get it...hand-made?
HAND-made?!
Hahaha! I'm so freaking punny! (A/N: *facepalm* Kill me now...-_-) (Editor's note: please do)
Ok...now to take in the very normal (abnormal for normal people) morning...
Heh...
My friends are freaks...
Yay!
Rin was talking to the tree again...dressing him up with an outfit that matched her own.
Koga was...OMG! HE IS ACTUALLY CONVERSING WITH AYAME!
Bankostu...was showing Jakostu how to do a pelvic thrust.
And Sango was slapping Miroku like there was no tomorrow?
Yep...normal.
I walked up to my family and started to have a conversation. Or at least try to.
"I heard you all the way from my tribe, dog-shit. So who was the chick getting played?" Koga said bluntly as he handed me a bouquet of flowers.
I then handed them to Ayame who hugged them to her chest like there was no tomorrow.
And my face exploded into red as I realized the meaning of his words.
"W-What?" I sputtered.
"You know. Moanin', sighin', sexin'." Koga grinned lopsidedly and wagged a eyebrow subjectively at me then was whacked on the side of the head by Ayame.
"No sexin'." Damn you Inuyasha. Why in the hell for feet did you need to say that?!
"Oh." Koga got a thoughtful look.
"'Oh' is right, Kogurt!" Rin announced as she finally separated herself from the tree and joined us humans.
"...Kogurt...?" Koga looks confused.
"I was hoping that all that sexual tension could be released like a giant thunderstorm of an orgasm!" Oh dear dog above...what is Rin saying?!
"...You mean like the first time for you and Lord Ice ass?" Bank stated flatly, Jakostu behind him looking confused as he practiced the pelvic thrust.
Rin threw her hands in the air and accidentally whacked Inuyasha in the chin. "Yeah, Man! Release the thunder-gasm!"
"MIROKU! If you want to go out with me, stop asking every damn women that comes by!" ...*pause*... "Now stop asking men, you gay-fart!"
I looked over at Miroku and Sango.
You never know when a referee is going to be needed.
"DAMN IT! I HATE WOMEN!" Sango roared.
"Lovely Sango...you are a woman."
Sango deflated. "...I know."
Miroku stepped up and in a suddenly incident of sweetness hugged her.
I'm gagging right now cause you can literally see the hearts coming off of them.
"Hey, hoes. Does anyone have Ms. Hina-" Jakostu decided the best person to try a pelvic thrust on was apparently Sakurako, who I'm guessing, is trying to mooch some answers for homework.
The multi colored hair girl stared down at her crotch, which briefly, had touched a gay's.
"I don't know whether or not to be flattered or creeped out beyond belief and scarred for life. Probably the latter." She said flatly before turning and walking toward Bank stiffly.
Everyone turned and stared at Jakostu, who blushed with embarrassment.
"What?" The flaming homo said. "How was I supposed to know I would cause her traumatic mental damage with this?!"
He then proceeded to do another air pelvic thrust.
A girl ran away screaming.
We all watched her run away then turned back to stare at Jak.
...wow...
It's REALLY awkward right now.
"Well...!" Rin drawled, and (thank god!) broke the awkward silence. "I have a challenge for everyone!"
As everyone gathered around the abnormal (even for us) girl, I saw Bank hand something to Sakurako; who was looking rather smug.
When I looked closer, I noticed what it was.
A 50 dollar bill.
Jelly: ansibdskajgxufbdiaodbdnakjxycjajabsix
Inuyasha: Yes.
Kagome: you understood her?
Jelly: *stares blankly at phone screen and drools*
Sesshomaru: *whispers into fluffy* What is she doing?
Sango: How in the hell did I get stuck in this giant hampster wheel?!
Jelly: needz...reviews...*sparks come off of head*
Miroku: WE'RE GOING TO NEED A BIGGER BOAT!
Inuyasha: Ring ring ring ring ring ring ring. Banana phone!
Sesshomaru: *answers Banana phone* No Dad! You're no father of mine anymore!
Sango:I CAN'T STOP RUNNING!
Jelly: *latched on to outside of wheel and ia spinning with it* WEEEEEE! BLEG~ *vomits*
Sneakers (my cat): *stares at vomit* I'm not cleaning that up...
(*Now for truth or dare!*)
(This idea is from Wolflover235)
Kagome: Naraku!
Naraku: *pokes Jelly who is sucking on his arm* how do you get it off? And truth.
Kagome: how do you feel about me?
Everyone: boobs.
Inuyasha: lame...
Jelly: *inhales deeply into Naraku* ah-h-h-h...you smell like soap and evil...evil soap.
Sesshomaru: *spins on pole* Just answer the damn question!
Naraku: I wanted the jewel. You could get lost for all I care.
Kelso: BURN!
Sesshomaru: *singing* She's a brick...HOOOUUSSSE!
Jelly: *to Naraku* Rape me...
PWC & Koga: Well...that escalated quickly.
Kagome: *crying* you...you don't care about me?
Naraku: *Pokes at Jelly again.* Its starting to hurt.
Ranma: How did I get here?
Inuyasha: *stares at Ranma*
Ranma: *stares at Inuyasha*
Batman: *sitting in dark corner of house* my parents are dead.
Everyone: thanks for the downer, man
Fan girls: look! Its batman! And he's in a banana hammock!
Batman: *looks down* how did I end up in this?!
Inuyasha: Your in Jelly's world. A.K.A. Hell.
Jelly: I'm gonna molest Inuyasha now, Narry! Peace!
Email: Review...*loner walk*
Question-6: When you think of the word "Death", what pops in your head?
(and remember, you may now ask me or the characters of the story, questions x3)
Thank you have a nice day!
Add a message from the editor/me that says:
Oh my GAWD! This took forever to edit! First it was the italics and then the misspellings and then the I capitalization. Goodness! But it was fun reading Jelly's story and stuff... Soo read this, review it, and recommend it! Bye!
-Editor/Email