Chapter 10
Situated at the writing desk in his guest quarters, Frederick pulled a worn journal from his pack, flipping halfway through the book to the next blank page. Dipping the tip of his pen into the tiny bottle of black ink, he thoughtfully gazed out the window for a long moment, watching the sun make its appearance over the snow-capped mountains before finally beginning to write.
Yesterday was one of the best days of my entire life. I believe that Kahlan has finally forgiven me for the past and is willing to move on to a better future together as father and daughter.
My little granddaughters are already becoming very precious to me in the little bit of time I have been allowed to spend with them. They remind me of Kahlan and Dennee when they were little girls, their laughter and their smiles brightening my day like nothing in this world ever could. Those are memories that I had thought were deeply buried and long forgotten, but were somehow resurrected while playing with Paige and Priya.
My new grandson Aiden is the spitting image of his father in every way and I couldn't be prouder. Richard Rahl is a tremendous man and I am honored to be able to call him my son-in-law. I am thankful that Kahlan was able to marry for love rather than being forced to take a mate into a loveless marriage.
I know it will be a slow process to build a bridge of trust with my daughter again, but after yesterday, I believe that we are finally on our way.
Frederick slowly sat back in his chair as he stared out the window again. The cold wind suddenly blew the naked branches of the tree right outside his window, causing them to tap lightly on the glass as his mind was abruptly swept back to darker times, times that he wished more than anything that he could forget.
So much had happened since that day so long ago when the Sisters of the Light had suddenly come, taking Kahlan and Dennee from him, so much that he wished that he could just forget and never be reminded of ever again.
I just hope that Kahlan will still allow me to be a part of her life and her family after I tell her the things that still need to be said. She has grown into a beautiful, strong woman just like I knew that she would so many years ago.
Even as a child, I could not ignore the fact that there was something very special about my eldest daughter, that she possessed abilities and a heart that would lead her to do great things someday. That was probably one of the reasons that I feared her so after her mother died. Even then I had a feeling that she was a very powerful Confessor, one that would surpass even her mother.
She has definitely not proven me wrong and I find that I am more proud than ever to be her father, the father of the Mother Confessor, the Lady Rahl of D'Hara.
After this visit, I hope that I will still be able to be called that by her.
It would probably be better if I just left things the way that they are now, but it wouldn't be fair to Kahlan. Maybe not telling her, though, would be better in the long run. She's going through enough heartache right now without adding to it.
He reread the words, pondering how he would be able to tell her the other reason behind his sudden visit after all this time. Drawing a deep breath, he finally closed the book, running his hand thoughtfully over the worn leather binding as a small affectionate smile crept to his lips.
Keeping a journal had been something that his father had always done. He could still picture his father sitting down at the small table by the fireplace, pulling out the small book and writing about the events of his day. Nothing was ever too trivial or too small to not be carefully documented in the numerous books that he had accumulated over the years.
Frederick had gotten out of the habit of writing after Kahlan's mother had died, allowing his anger and bitterness to consume his life and hardening his heart instead. He was proud that he finally had some things about his life that were worth recording now.
Hopefully Kahlan would be able to read these journals in the years to come and look back fondly on the times that they had shared, proud of the things that he had eventually been able to accomplish with his life. He would love for her to be as proud to call him her father just as he was to call her his daughter.
Frederick wistfully stroked his gray bearded chin, the soft sound of laughter spilling from his lips as he remembered the squeals of delight that had filled the nursery when his granddaughters had grabbed hold of his beard. They brought him a sense of joy that he had never known could exist.
Tears sprung to his eyes as he thought about the family that he had here now. The thought of leaving them and returning to his home suddenly seemed so unbearable. He had been putting off this visit for months now, fearing the reception that he would receive once he had arrived.
Now, the thought of leaving them seemed so much worse to him.
Instead of being sent away or rejected, he had been welcomed into their family and close circle of friends. He had deserved the former, but had received more than he could have ever hoped for.
Stuffing the journal into his pack, he retrieved two small wrapped bundles, a small brown glass bottle escaping and rolling out onto the table as well. He felt his heart sink as he picked up the small bottle. Holding it up in his hand, he ran his thumb over the brown curling label, feeling such a sense of conflict over what he knew was coming.
He carefully placed the small bottle into his vest pocket, steeling himself for meeting with Kahlan later and the talk that he would need to have with her. He didn't know how it was going to go but he knew avoiding it was no longer the answer.
XXX
"Richard, this is far from settled," Zedd tried to reason with him. "Just because I confirmed that Michael is physically your son doesn't mean that that's the end of it."
"No, it just means that I have a child with a woman who I do not love, who is not my wife, and who I have never made love with," Richard grumbled, crossing his arms against his chest in simmering agitation.
"I'm just saying that we need to look into this further. This little boy didn't just come into existence on his own. It's not like it's his fault."
Casting a glance at his grandfather, Richard couldn't suppress the frown that had become fixed on his lips this morning despite the passionate night that he had spent with Kahlan. "Well, I had nothing to do with it either. Someone is behind this and I want to know who."
"I'm not saying that you did, but something obviously happened that night that you weren't aware of at the time," Zedd insisted.
"Obviously!" he retorted. "So am I just supposed to welcome this child into my family, accept him as my own when I had no part in it? And what about Sister Deryn? Am I supposed to accept her into the family as well?"
"I don't know yet, but hopefully things will become clearer once we have more answers."
"I just can't believe that this is happening," Richard shook his head as he came to stand before an elaborate tapestry that outlined the lineage of the House of Rahl, the irony of it all not lost on him. "All I've ever dreamed of was creating a family with Kahlan, Zedd. This…this is not the way it was supposed to be."
"I know, my boy," Zedd sympathized, his heart heavy as he stared at his grandson's back. "Sometimes we just have to learn to accept that life doesn't go the way that we had planned."
"That's an understatement," he snapped. "But how do I love a child who is mine, but I had nothing to do with, whose mother means nothing to me?"
The Wizard crossed the room to stand behind his grandson, his boney weathered hand finding his shoulder. "I know you, Richard," Zedd softly said. "You have a good heart. You and Kahlan will do the right thing in the end."
"Kahlan's already beginning to have her doubts," Richard finally admitted, his eyes momentarily falling closed in anguish. "I can't blame her, though. The evidence is glaring us in the face no matter what I say."
"In her heart, Kahlan knows that you were never with that woman, Richard," he reassured him. "I admit that it is very disconcerting to look into that little boy's eyes and believe that he's not yours somehow, but we all know that you'd never betray Kahlan. That's why we keep looking for the truth."
"I have nothing to hide." Richard finally turned around to face his grandfather again, feeling as though they'd had this conversation a hundred times already. "I'll do whatever it takes in order to get to the truth. I will not allow this to ruin my marriage."
"I highly doubt that you will lose Kahlan over this," Zedd scoffed, his wrinkles deepening with his incredulous expression. "Kahlan loves you deeply, Richard. She's not going to just walk away over something that you had no part or choice in."
"I just can't lose her over this," the Seeker replied, more to himself than to his grandfather.
"Richard, I have an idea," Nicci excitedly announced as she flew into his office, her black dress elegantly floating like a billowing storm cloud around her.
With a smile on her lips, she waved a book triumphantly in her hand causing Richard to internally cringe. The last time she'd had a book to show him, it contained a prophecy telling them how he would be forced to take Kahlan's life in order to save the world from Scai.
"Please, no more prophecies," Richard groaned. "I've had enough of those to last me a lifetime."
"No, it's not a prophecy." Nicci shook her head with a frown as she brushed her long blond hair back behind her shoulder. "Last night, I remembered something about being able to use magic to probe a person's mind."
Taken aback by the idea, Zedd came to stand beside the sorceress at the table, taking the book from her. "Do you really think that Sister Deryn would be willing to allow you to just sift through her private thoughts and memories? This is kind of a delicate matter."
"She'll have to or I'll have her removed from the Palace," Richard flatly stated. "Someone is playing a dangerous game with my life. It's threatening my marriage, my family, my future and I will not stand for it. Deryn will comply with whatever we need to do to find the truth or she'll take her son and never return."
The scornful heat of Richard's words sent an icy shiver through her, the anger that permeated him making her anxious with an overwhelming need to protect and defend him, to make things right once again. She hated seeing him so upset like this. He should be overjoyed, celebrating the birth of his son with Kahlan, not trying to defend his name against outrageous claims.
Nicci wished now that she would've paid better attention to what had been going on during the Seeker's stay at the Palace of the Prophets. At the time, though, she'd been much more interested in getting her hands on Richard's Han than getting his…
"So you think that you can do this?" Zedd asked, his white eyebrows crinkling together in contemplative skepticism as he flipped through the book.
"I possess both forms of powerful magic, Zedd. I can do almost anything I want to," Nicci reminded him with a knowing smirk.
Coming to stand behind her, Richard chuckled softly despite himself. "I wouldn't question her, Zedd. I thought you would've learned that by now."
"I still wish you'd let me have her," Cara suddenly interjected as she entered the room as well. "I'd have the truth in a lot less time and with a lot less hassle."
"Cara, you're supposed to be resting," Richard sighed in frustration, leveling a disapproving look at her. "Do I have to make it an order?"
"You know I wouldn't listen and besides I'm fine," Cara huffed in annoyance. "I wish everyone would stop worrying about me. I'm carrying a baby not dragon fire that could explode at any moment if I accidently breathe wrong."
"I know, but you still need to take care yourself," the Seeker insisted. "And I'm not going to submit Deryn to Mord'Sith tactics no matter how furious I am over the situation. Besides, something tells me she's not the one who is behind all of this."
"What do you mean?" Cara's gaze narrowed with his words, wondering what thoughts were spinning around in his head now. "You think there's more to it than whatever Sister Deryn did on her own to have a baby who looks exactly like you."
"Someone planned this whole thing, someone bigger and more powerful than Deryn. I want to know who and why."
"Just have Kahlan confess her and be done with it already," Cara replied with a characteristic roll of her green eyes. "She'll tell you everything you want to know and then some."
"I don't want to resort to that unless absolutely necessary," Richard adamantly announced with a shake of his head. "As ludicrous as her claim is, I don't want to use torture or confession to get to the bottom of this. She might be just as much as victim as I am in this."
"What are you talking about?" Cara scowled at him, not liking the thought one bit. "She certainly doesn't act like the victim. From what I've heard, she acts like she wants to be the next Lady Rahl. She obviously wants you back."
"She never had me to begin with," he spat out, releasing a frustrated breath. "Besides, there already is a Lady Rahl."
"That doesn't mean that she's not going to try to win you back," Nicci carefully pointed out. "Sister Deryn is truly in love with you, believes that you and she had a relationship no matter how short-lived or one-sided it was at the time. There's no telling how far she'll go to get your attention or to be a family with you and Michael."
"I have a wife and a family that I love more than life itself," he growled. "I don't want a new one."
"We know that, Richard, but Deryn definitely does not see it that way," the sorceress calmly replied. "She's been agreeable and forthcoming so far but there's no telling when that will suddenly end. Things could get very ugly very fast if we don't get to the bottom of this soon."
"Do you think that Kahlan or our children are in danger?"
Richard's hand instinctively fell to his weapon hanging at his hip with the sudden realization, his eyes hardening in fear. He would not hesitate to end this now if he thought for one moment his wife or family was being threatened.
"It's a definite possibility," Nicci admitted, pursing her lips and casting a sidelong glance at the Seeker. "We need to at least consider it."
"Cara, I want Garren to increase security around my quarters. Kahlan and the children are not go anywhere without guards and Deryn is not to be allowed to leave her guest quarters for any reason," Richard ordered.
"I'll take care of it," Cara replied, an impish look suddenly filling her face as she planted her fists on her hips as if begging him to try and challenge her. "Or do you think it's too much for me to handle right now what with this baby I'm carrying?"
Richard glared at her in annoyance, not the least bit amused by her sarcasm. His family was in danger and he was not in the mood for this. "Just make sure it happens," he replied in exasperation as he pinched the bridge of his nose.
"Consider it done," she smirked as she turned to leave, pleased to have finally been allowed to be part of the action again.
Richard shook his head in amazement as he watched the Mord'Sith leave the room before turning his attention back to Nicci. "Will using your magic to probe Deryn's mind create any pain for her?"
"No, it should be safe and completely painless," Nicci reassured him, taking the book back from the Wizard.
"Is it really our right to be probing through her private thoughts and memories?" Zedd questioned. "I'm not saying that I'm against it or that I don't think we should try it. I just want to be absolutely certain that we are making the right decisions here. This is someone's life we are prying into."
"What would you suggest we do?" Richard asked. "We're not forcing Deryn to do anything. She is more than free to take Michael and leave the Palace at any time. She is the one who showed up here making false claims. We are just trying to get to the truth."
"I know, my boy," Zedd sighed in resignation. "I just can't help feeling somewhat bad for the girl and especially for Michael. The little boy has no idea what is going on, doesn't understand any of this. And like you said, Deryn could be pawn in this game just like you are."
"I know what you mean," the Seeker reluctantly admitted, some of the fire suddenly vanishing from his voice with his grandfather's words. "I feel bad too, but she is potentially threatening my marriage and my family, my reputation. I can't sit back and let this go, not with everything that I hold most important to me on the line."
"It's going to take me a little bit to read up on this," Nicci informed them with a sigh. "Hopefully, we can do this later this afternoon or tomorrow if Deryn is willing."
"I'm grateful for whatever you can do, Nicci," Richard replied. "I just want this resolved as soon as possible."